A/N - J.K owns everything except the house. :)
If you want to see the house,farmhouse,villa, go to the link on my profile.
Read on.
Meet Collins
"So, I was thinking we go out and celebrate you becoming partner tonight."
I turned around after I locked my office door and started walking with Guy, my best friend at Capper Orion.
"I'm not a partner yet Guy, they tell us tomorrow."
Guy put his hand on my shoulder and stopped me from walking.
"Oh but you have been made a partner. I'm just not meant to tell anyone."
I stared at him, "No way."
He nodded, his grin widening, "Congratulations!" he hugged me, but then said in a hushed voice, "But you can't tell anyone. Got it Collins?"
I nodded. Everything I'd done had gone towards being made a partner at Capper Orion, the Wizarding world's biggest law firm. I was the firm's youngest attorney, at 26. Sounds impossible, huh, but because of the war they were struggling, and shone. 5 years of early mornings and late nights, stress deadlines and such and such, and now, it had all payed off.
I got on the elevator, leaving the office in a daze. The usual exit was clogged with other workers leaving so I decided to use the Floo network. I've only ever used the floo network once or twice and didn't like it. I headed into the room, somewhat like the Ministry's Floo room, and stepped into a fireplace and was whisked away.
I groaned. Why was it so bright?
I got up from my hands and knees and looked around. This certainly did not look like my living room, one, there were hills, trees and a road. I looked around me and recognized the platform I was standing on was a train station, but it was empty and small. I walked out to the front of the station and saw a family packing up their car. A train must've just left.
"Dear! Hello there."
My neck cricked painfully as I whipped my head around to the caller. A lady dressed in classy clothes was rushing towards me with; I'm guessing her husband, trailing behind.
Oh good, I can ask them where I am.
"Hello, I'm Collins Monroe…"
"Yes dear, now, all set, we'll take you up to the villa and you can get all acquainted."
What? What was this woman going on about?
"I…"
"Come now, quickly, the new guests will be arriving shortly."
Confused, I walked back to her car and hopped in.
"Now, you'll be at the villa for 5 hours a day doing the everyday stuff, and then you will come back to our house which is just down the hill, short walking distance for the rest. You will cook, clean, iron, dust, and answer to the guest, and to myself and Charles when you're at our home."
I opened my mouth to reply when I saw a sign saying "Colle Val d'Elsa".
That couldn't be? Oh god, I can't be in Italy.
"Collins dear? Did you hear me?" said … oh I don't know her name. How do I get this out of her?
"Yes…mam?... If you don't mind me saying but, you're English."
Charles chuckled from the driving seat, "Thank you for stating that, I was never quite sure myself."
I smiled. Despite being in a foreign country and lost, Charles seemed like a funny man with silvery hair.
"Patricia and I decided we'd like to convert a farmhouse in Tuscany and to rent it out, after I sold my company." he explained.
What an odd ambition. Still, I had a way of getting their names off them. Here goes.
"And um, what would you like me to call you? Patricia, Charles or Mrs.…"
Patricia cut in front of me, "Oh if you would dear, call me Mrs. Nevis."
Excellent, Collins.
I realized Mrs. Nevis was still talking, "…and so as Housekeeper…"
If it was possible, I would've fallen of my chair, but WHAT? Oh no, what have I gotten myself into.
We arrived at a beautiful stone converted farmhouse, and got out of the car.
"Now, I'll give you a grand tour. Living room, dining room, kitchen down there. Upstairs now, guest bedroom, down here, master bedroom, master bedroom, both with ensuites, don't forget. Let's go onto the terrace. Now, the pool needs the cover on it at night, its electric so just press the button. Parasol goes up in the morning, down at night. Pool house through there with bathroom. Now, kitchen, it's your domain, so get acquainted. Where did you say you were trained?" Mrs. Nevis stopped and turned to face me as I stared in horror at this beautiful kitchen, it looked so…. Italian!
My face took on another look of horror as I realized she was asking where I trained. Surely she can't be a wizard. I'll have to take my chances.
Putting on my best attorney voice, pulling out some of that courage that had hidden away since I arrived, I spoke up, "I've trained at Capper Orion for 5 years, mam."
I'm not lying. I can say I misunderstood if she is a witch.
She thought for a second, "Never heard of it" – I swear I must've deflated so fast from the breath I was holding in – "Prestigious is it?"
"Oh, only the best, mam," I replied.
"Where is Capper Orion?"
Shit! She's English, she'll know… English culinary places. Crap.
"It's ah, in ….. Australia."
Australia? Seriously, Collins?
"5 years. That's a long time. I'm surprised you don't have an accent." She said thoughtfully.
"I mask it well. While I was there it was all 'G'day Mate' and 'Tucker'," I explained.
What? Australian's don't talk like that. That what people think they talk like…
Recognition crossed Mrs. Nevis' face, "Oh yes, obviously."
…And apparently Mrs. Nevis thinks so too.
"Well," she said, slapping her hands on the counter, "I'll leave you to making a nice large Italian Vongole, or Tiramisu for the guests to feel welcomed to Italy."
I stared in shock as Mrs. Nevis left.
What the hell is a Vongolly, or Vongali, or argh! And how the hell am I meant to make it? I'm an attorney, I don't even know how to make toast!
Deciding to try something, I opened all the cupboards to find a pot or something and some food. Pasta shouldn't be hard enough; it's just pasta and sauce.
I picked something up from out of a drawer and stared at it.
Well, it's got a button, so it's mechanical, easy enough. But what does it do?
I poured some tomato sauce into a pot and stuck the thing in it. Nothing.
"What I this?" I shouted in frustration.
I put it back into the pot and moved it around. A stirrer perhaps?
"Argh!" Then it occurred to me. It has button, and it stirs. I put the thing to the top of the sauce so it was touching.
"Maybe it goes like this…" I pressed the button…
And screamed as tomato sauce went flying everywhere, especially onto the man that just came from behind the arch.
