Not Too Far Off.


Your name is Karkat Vantas, you have numerous stab wounds on your fingertips. You have been trying to sew together a doll for Nepeta Leijon, it isn't going well. Your moirail, Gamzee Makara, has been impatiently waiting for you to finish, eager to talk to you on Tollian, he doesn't seem to understand that you are too bust for his shenanigans.

You wait five more minutes and decide it is time to give your scarred appendages a break. Besides, you are going o go shithive maggots if you hear another beep. You lightly run your finger across your track pad, flinching slightly in pain. You see eleven pop ups littering your screen, coincidentally it matches the number of red dots decorating your fingertips.

TerminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TC: HeY mY bRoThEr.

TC: WhAt ThE mOtHeRfUcK aRe YoU dOiNg?

TC: OkAy I sEe HoW iT iS.

TC: WhY aRe YoU oNlInE iF yOu ArEn'T gOnNa ReSpOnD?

TC: ArE yOu AlL bUsY mY mAiN mAn?

TC: SoMe ReAl ShIt Is GoIn DoWn MaN.

TC: I nEeD sOmE oF tHaT aLl AdViCe YoU gIvE.

TC: YoU hAvE tO mOtHeRfUcKiNg AnSwEr Me SoMeTiMe, BrO.

TC: I cAn Do ThIs AlL dAy.

TC: I cAn JuSt ThRoW bAcK tHiS sHiT tHaT hIsSeS.

TC: I tHoUgHt AfTeR tWo Of ThOsE mIrAcUlOuS dRiNkS yOu WoUlD hAvE aNsWeReD.

CG: OKAY WHAT IN THE FLYING FUCK COULD YOUR NOOK-SUCKING ASS NEED?

TC: Oh HeY mOtHeRfUcKeR. hOw Is It HaNgInG mY mAn?

CG: THE ONLY FUCKING THING THAT IS GOING TO HANG IS YOU IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT IN THE HELL YOU NEEDED. I WAS BUSY MAKING SOMETHING YOU FUCKASS.

TC: WhAt ThE mOtHeRfUcK wErE yOu DoInG?

CG: I AM MAKING MY STUPID FUCKING SECRET SANTA GIFT.

TC: WhY yOu AlL mAkInG sOmEtHiNg?

CG: NEPETA'S LIST THING SAID SHE WANTED SOMETHING HAND FUCKING MADE.

TC: GoOd LuCk WiTh ThAt BrO.

CG: THANKS. NOW FUCK THE HELL OFF SO I CAN FINISH.

TC: WhAtEvEr YoU nEeD bRo.

TC: HiT mE uP wHeN yOu ArE dOnE.

TerminallyCapricious [TC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

You are now really fucking annoyed, seeing as that was a huge waste of time. You let out a breath and pick the doll you were working on back up. You adjust the small cat hat you finished a few hours earlier, it's kinda lopsided, but you're pretty sure she won't care. You go to reach for the small trench coat Kanaya made for you to use, knowing you wouldn't be able to do it on your own. You have it almost all the way on the doll when you here a loud, familiar laugh rips through the hallway outside your door.

"OH, K4RK4T," you hear her scream, instantly wanting to punch yourself in the face. "WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1ING 1N TH3R3? YOU H4V3N'T L3FT YOUR ROOM 4LL D4Y!"

You recognize her as Terezi, your formal flush-crush and all around pain in your nook. You flinch as she slams your door into the wall, there is even a hole she has created over her numerous attempts to make a grand entrance into your room.

"1S TH4T 4 DOLL, K4RK4T?" she shouts as she approaches you, her loud cackle soon fills your ears. You don't think you can take many more interruptions.

"YES. IT IS A FUCKING DOLL. NOW WHY THE HELL DO YOU CARE?"

"OOOOOOOOOOH," she exclaims, making a reach for it. "WHY 4RE YOU M4K1NG 4 DOLL?! 1S TH4T FOR YOUR S3CR3T S4NT4?"

You pull the doll close to your chest just before she is able to touch it. "WHY THE FUCK DO YOU CARE? A TROLL CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING DOLL FOR NO GODDAMN REASON?"

You can hear her cackle again, it's making you miss back when you only read what she was doing rather than hear it. "YOU 4R3 SO FUNNY, K4RK4T. 3V3RYON3 KNOWS YOU WOULD R4TH3R KILL YOURS3LF TH4N M4K3 SOM3TH1NG."

"WILL YOU JUST GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM? JEGUS DICK YOU ARE SO GODDAMN NOSY ABOUT EVERYFUCKINGTHING," you yell at her, using your free hand to swat at her.

"OK4Y, 1 C4N T3LL YOU N33D MOR3 T1M3 TO F1N1SH YOUR DOLLY," she says with yet another cackle as she exit your room, slamming the door behind here.

"JEGUS FUCKING DICK," you mumble to yourself, "I JUST NEED TO PUT HER FUCKING JACKET ON AND FINISH THESE GODDAMN HORNS."

You finish putting the small green trench coat on the tiny Nepeta and reach for the orange thread. Right before you get the thread through the eye of the needle you hear your doorknob turn.

"Karkitty!" you hear a high pitch voice sing as your door creaks open. "Equius isn't here to play with me, can you?"

You let out a breath and slam the needle down, shoving the small doll in your pocket. "WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED ME TO PLAY WITH YOU?"

You watch as her smile falls into a frown. "I just... I thought you would want to have some fun—you've b33n hiding in your room all day!"

You sigh and start to feel guilty. "I GUESS I CAN PLAY WITH YOU. BUT ONLY FOR A SHORT ASS TIME. I HAVE SHIT TO DO, YOU KNOW!"

Her face lights up and she does a small jump. "Okay! I'll be waiting in my room fur you!" She bounces out of your room, not bothering to close the door behind her.

You let out a breath and try to count to ten to calm yourself—you only make it to five before you decide there is no point in doing stupid shit like that. You grab your husktop, pulling it a bit harder than usual to unhook it from it's charger. You wrestle with the doll as you reach your door, trying to shove it in your pocket to be sure Nepeta—or any other troll for that matter—can find it.

You're shaking your head as you walk down the hallway and towards the catlike troll's room. You pass by Dave as you near Terezi's room. You swallow hard and try not to focus on it, you tell yourself you don't care about them being matesprits. Even though she is a pain in your nook, you are still pissed she chose that nook-sucking human over you.

"Hey," you hear him say, his deep southern drawl making his voice easily recognized, "you dropped somethin' there."

You turn to face him, he's holding out the doll you tried so hard to conceal. You snatch it from him and try not to make eye contact.

"You could at least say thank you, ya know," he says, knowing just how to piss you off.

"THANKS, YOU BULGE-GUZZLING FUCKASS," you snap.

"Wow, you're still pissed, are ya? About me stealin' ya girlfriend?"

"I DON'T GIVE TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU AND THAT PAIN IN THE ASS."

"Uh-huh," he says, slowly nodding his head. "Seeing as you have the little kitty, I don't see why you should be pissed."

"WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE YOU TALK ING ABOUT?" you're shouting now, but no one else has noticed since it's not really an odd thing to happen.

"You and Nepeta, ya'll are thing now, aren't cha?"

Your face is turning red for some reason. "SHUT THE FUCK UP, WE'RE NOTHING."

"Sure ya are," he says as he raises his eyebrows at you. "Whatever helps ya sleep at night."

"JUST FUCK OFF, STRIDER, NO ONE ASKED FOR YOUR DUMB FUCKING OPINION ANYWAY, YOU GODDAMN NOSY ASS HUMAN."

He shrugs at you, puts his hand in his pocket and keeps walking.

Your hands have turned into fists, but you try to calm down so you don't take it out on Nepeta. You don't know why you have the urge to be nice to her, but you'd rather just not question it.

"KARKITTY!" you hear her squeal as she looks up from her tablet, she's sitting on the floor against her wall.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT," you tell her as you walk into her room and close the door behind you.

She sets down her tablet and runs up to you, her big eyes staring into yours. "Don't be so grrrrouchy!" she scolds before pouncing on you for a hug.

You bite your lip as her arms wrap around your neck. "GET OFF ME OR I'M GOING BACK TO MY ROOM."

"Fine, fine," she pouts as she pulls herself away from you. She looks up at you and interlocks her fingersand rests them under her chin. "What rolepaly game do you want to play? I'll let you pick!"

"I DON'T FUCKING CARE, JUST NOT ONE OF YOUR DUMB CUTE ONES."

"But they're allllllllll cute!" she exclaims, her eyebrows beginning to furrow.

You stare at her for a few seconds before caving in. "FINE. BUT DON'T FUCKING TELL ANYONE."

"Okay, Karkitty," she says with a giggle as she walks back to her spot.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING CALL ME THAT," you snap as you go to sit beside her.

"And I told you to stop being so grrrrrouchy!" she says as she playfully pushes your shoulder.

You choose to just breath and open your husktop to play one of her dumb roleplay games. "WHAT ONE ARE WE PLAYING?"

"Here," she says as she leans over you and starts typing, "I'll open it fur you."

Your cheeks glow a light red as you feel her body so close to you, but for some reason you don't yell at her to get off.

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you're going to fucking snap because that fuckass Strider wasn't too far off.


I hope I didn't disappoint you guise with this second part! also, I'm not a big fan of Karezi, but I do recognize that Karkitty does have feelings for her, so I tried my best to not deny that here in this story.