"I hate camping…" John grumbled. The fire the five of them were sitting around was pathetic, and getting smaller by the minute. "Look at this thing! I swear, it's making me colder," the pyrokinetic moaned, shivering dramatically. Even Bobby, the ice mutant, had to admit it wasn't the warmest of nights. A conspiratorial smirk lit up John's face, and after he stared at some dying embers, the fire miraculously came back to life.
"You're not supposed to use your powers, John!" Kitty hissed, looking to Logan for support.
"Hey, it's warm now," Logan reasoned, obviously less mindful of the school rules than Kitty was. Bobby and John smirked when Logan continued, "For all I know, the fire got bigger on its own." He threw on another log for good measure, then sat back down on his sleeping bag. During the summer, most students went home, leaving only Iceman, Pyro, Rogue, Shadowcat, and Wolverine as babysitter. Professor Xavier had suggested he take them camping so that the four students wouldn't lay around the mansion all summer. He wasn't the paternal type, but he lived in the mansion long enough to understand that leaving students like John and Bobby in an empty, very expensively furnished mansion wasn't a good idea. Unfortunately, that meant playing chaperone.
When Scott came back from his vacation with Jean, Logan was going to kill him. The spot he'd suggested to the group was about as wild as it could get (convincing Logan it was some kind of scheme to get rid of him), and the nights were as cold as the days hot. He was just about to curse Cyclops again when he realized their little group was now missing four of its five members.
"Where'd everybody go?" he barked, sniffing the air for their scent. There was an odd combination of cinnamon, snowflakes, flowers, and the fruity gum Kitty had been chewing. "You didn't see them leave?" he said, vaguely aware that he sounded crazy talking to himself. "Relax. They're probably just going the bathroom," Logan guessed, using the answer that meant the least trouble. He would've seemed hopeful if his gruffness had allowed it. 'Well, is that what you really think they're doing?' Logan argued internally. If they had been there, he could just imagine Kitty and Rogue looking at each other before breaking into grins.
"No!" they would say.
"Well, this is just great…" Logan mumbled under his breath. "I'm stuck being babysitter and now I've got four renegades on the loose." 'In a highly flammable forest', he thought to himself.
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Bobby glanced at his friend nervously when the shark Zippo came out of his pocket. "John, are you sure we should be doing this around so many trees?"
"So maybe a few trees get torched…" John said off-handedly. "What's the big deal? I hear ice isn't that great for trees either," he said sarcastically, drawing the flame out to rest in his palm. John's smirk grew wider, and he pulled something out from behind his back, tossing it to Bobby. His friend looked at it in confusion before it registered. This was Logan's alcohol.
"Dude, are you crazy?" That only seemed to make John happier.
"He's gonna kill us!" Kitty lamented, though with her ability, she'd be pretty safe.
Bobby groaned at his best friend's antics, because someone had to, but his curiosity got the better of him. "How'd you get this?"
"What does it matter? How long do you think it'll be before he finds us?" Pyro said excitedly, and Rogue smiled. As much as she loved Logan, she knew he could be aggressive, and worried about what he would do to Bobby and John once he found them. He wouldn't do anything to her or Kitty, she knew. Stealing alcohol from Logan was no small feat, seeing as he hoarded it like one would treasure, and she thought John was a little crazy for doing so.
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"I'm gonna kill those two…" Logan growled, his claws coming out. Wait. His senses alerted him, and he listened.
"Superman." That was Bobby.
"Yeah right! Spiderman would crush Superman…" Judging by John's slurring, there was a slim to none chance in there being enough alcohol left to give Wolverine even a slight buzz. Now that he knew where they were, he felt no need to hesitate in reprimanding them.
"Wolverine!" Bobby greeted amicably, the alcohol having taken away any sense of self-preservation he'd once had.
John winced dramatically at the sight of their teacher, making a face Kitty was sure only he could pull off. "Looks like we're in trouble, Kitten," he smirked, not sound as apologetic as she would've liked.
"And what do you think you're doing?!" Logan declared, more triumphant than angry, as he had finally found his prey.
"We were…satirizing. It's better than it sounds, you know," John said slowly. "Satirizing."
"Nice vocabulary, man," Bobby complimented, giving him a thumbs-up while moving to take another swig. Logan intercepted it, taking a large gulp and feeling instant relief. The two drunken teenagers seemed undeterred, and Kitty and Rogue watched on with amusement. John suddenly became bold, and said, "You've gotta love the effects of alcohol. Long-lasting, fast-acting…it has it all." Logan nodded in agreement before realizing this was one of his sweet, innocent students talking.
"That's it. We're going home," Logan announced.
"Finally," John muttered, no longer slurring. He reached down to pull Bobby up, and Logan felt a flash of annoyance. Had they tricked him?
"Is this some kind of inside joke I'm not a part of? Did April Fools come early?" he ranted.
"Johnny's just a weird drunk," Rogue assured him. "Wasted one second, sober the next."
