WTF?


OMIGOD I AM SOOO COOL THAT I HAVE THE REEVEW REPLIES HERE!

Jay Resop: I FORGOT YOSHIZILLA I AM SOOOO SORRY I WILL PUT IN THIS CHAPTER!
Act II: I HATE YOU! STFU!
Joeb: U TEH SUXORZ! STFU!
Razzkat: YOU TEH LIARRR! STFU!
Turquoise: I M THE GENIUS AND U R NOT! STFU!
Jigglypuff: WHY DIDN'T U REVIEW MY STORY JIGGLYPUFF I HATE YOU NOW STFU!
SkyQueen3: STFU!
Fool: Actually, I completely agree with you on all points, especially about 'review or I won't update'. Thanks for the review.
Rynada: IS THAT A FLAME? STFU!


Chapter 2


"Well, we'd better get you to your room," said Samus to Wigglytuff.

Wigglytuff nodded eagerly.

"NO!" said Master Hand. "You must immediately enter into a fight to prove just how cool you are!"

Wigglytuff looked confused, but then she shrugged.


Suddenly, at Final Destination…

"Where the heck is this?" said Link.

"It doesn't matter," said Master Hand. "How about it's a vortex in the middle of nowhere?"

"Uh… kay," said Link.

"The point is, you will now fight our new Smasher, Wigglytuff!"

"All right," said Link.

The fight began. It was, for reasons involving a huge lack of imagination and/or effort on the part of the author, exactly like fights were in Super Smash Bros. Melee. In fact, it was so exactly like SSBM, that huge numbers appeared in the air, counting down until the fight began.

"GO!" shouted Master Hand.

Link jumped forward and slashed at Wigglytuff with his boomerang.

Wigglytuff's happy smile turned to a shocked look of indignation. "Wigglytuff!" she said angrily.

Link poked Wigglytuff with an arrow, in the eye.

Wigglytuff fainted in shock, falling backwards to the ground.

She didn't move.

"Uh…" said Link uncertainly, "do I win?"

"Wait…" said Master Hand. "It looks like she's charging up her noobishly powerful slap attack!"

Link looked at Wigglytuff's body, which still lay still. "Oo-kay…"


Three hours later…

"Look," said Link, "nothing is happening."

Wigglytuff got up and slapped Link on the cheek.

"Ow!" said Link.

Link poked Wigglytuff with his bombs.

Wigglytuff started crying.

"Aw," said Link, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

It suddenly occurred to Link that he was holding a lit bomb.

"Huh," he said. "I'd better throw this away."

It blew up, and Link staggered back slightly.

Wigglytuff smiled vacantly.

"Meh," said Master Hand, "we all know that Wigglytuff was going to win this anyway, so…"

Master Hand swooped down, grabbed Link, and dragged him out of the arena.

"WIGGLYTUFF WINS!" he shouted.

"Yay!" cheered the crowd.

"How can there be a crowd if we're in a vortex in the middle of nowhere?" wondered Samus.

"Shut up, person-who-was-raised-by-birds," said Falco, shoving her.

"Shut up, bird," said Samus, shoving him back.

"Ooh, clever comeback," said Falco sincerely.

"Yes-a," said Luigi.


Later, once Link had recovered from his humiliating defeat at the hands of Wigglytuff, he went over to talk to her.

"Hey," he said.

"Wig!" said Wigglytuff brightly.

"Yeah," said Link. "Anyway, congratulations. It's amazing. It's… wow, it's just so amazing that there's a Smash Brother so awesomely over-powered that tournaments become a complete waste of time."

Wigglytuff nodded.

"Yeah, good work," said Link, backing away, and then fleeing in shame.

On the other side of the room, Marth and Roy were discussing the newest Smasher.

"She's really something, you know," said Marth, running his hand over his sword as he held it up to the light.

"You're right," said Roy. "I just have to make out with her and then kiss her furiously and then become deeply, deeply romantically involved – so much that we marry."

Silence.

"If you get what I mean," said Roy.

"Yeah, I get what you mean," said Marth. "It's interesting, isn't it? Here we all were, living our lives normally, and suddenly a new arrival causes everyone to get caught up in a huge love triangle."

"It's not a triangle if it has over twenty people in it," said Roy.

"Okay, love icosagon," corrected Marth.

"I said over twenty," said Roy.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" said Marth, standing up and raising his sword. "I'm sorry that I offended you by implying that a triangle can have more than three sides! But you know what, Roy? I don't care! In fact, I hate you! Let's never be friends again!"

"Fine!" replied Roy angrily. Then he stopped. "Wait – Marth, don't you see? This newest Smash Brother, Wigglytuff, is driving us all to madness! It's horrible!"

"You're right," said Marth. "We must keep level heads."

Peach went flying by on a broomstick, with Mario chasing after her, waving a large green and purple glowstick.

"Level heads," agreed Roy.


THANK YOU all for T3H REVIUWS!

I want more reviews!

(Yeah, also read stories by me, Yoshizilla who I completely forgot about and I'm sooooo sorry, Kill the Empire and Oni who I've never actually read a single story by, and all the people I mentioned in the first chapter (they're great), and Tikitikirevenge, and me. Oh, and yours truly.)


Oh, and whoever flamed me – thanks for adding to my review count. Can you do that for every chapter? I promise to take your abuse to heart. –crosses fingers–