The song is 'Crazy', written by Willie Nelson and performed by Patsy Cline and Ray Price.

Chapter 2

Several hours went on without anybody else coming inside the hatch. With the frenzy surrounding Shannon's death, the arrival of new survivors and Walt's kidnapping, everybody had much better things to do than to come in and check on Sawyer. Kate couldn't blame them; Sawyer had never made any effort to fit in, she thought sadly as she watched him sleep. Almost from the second she had met him, she had known that, deep down, he wanted nothing more than to be liked, but something was stopping him from showing it. After she had discovered why he had taken the name 'Sawyer', she had begun to get a clearer idea of why it was that way.

He wanted to punish himself.

Her heart sank at the thought. She would have wanted to help him, to make him understand that he wasn't a bad person after all. But who was she really to contemplate such a thing? She had her own issues with being bad or good, and that was complicated enough.

She suddenly heard some footsteps. Someone was coming.

"Hey, Kate," Jack said as he entered the bedroom. "I came back as soon as I could. There's a lot going on right now."

"I know. Locke told me," Kate replied evenly. She didn't really want to know more about the latest events. For once, she was content just to sit back and let others handle things.

Jack nodded and got closer to Sawyer.

"How is he?" he asked, checking his pulse.

"He hasn't trembled since you left. I think his fever went down a little," Kate answered, more hopeful than convinced.

Jack checked Sawyer's temperature and shook his head.

"No, his fever's still up there. I can't tell if the antibiotics are working. I'm sorry."

For the first time since Sawyer had returned, Kate felt fear overwhelm her. She felt like she couldn't breathe, she felt like she couldn't move. The medication had to work, he just couldn't die.

Aware of her anxiety, Jack put a soothing hand on her shoulder.

"Kate, he's not doing worse than he was, and that's a good sign," he said, but she didn't know if he was just saying that to reassure her. But she had to get a grip on herself. Remembering what Jack had told her about allowing himself to be afraid for five seconds before moving on, she started to count silently.

One, two, three, four, five.

She opened her eyes and met Jack's.

"There has to be something more I could do for him than just sitting here watching him fight for his life."

Jack looked at her curiously for a second before saying:

"It'll help to get some food in him. Keep him hydrated, maybe mash up some fruit and see if you can get him to eat it."

Happy to be able to do something, she had a tiny smile.

"I got it."

After Jack had finally been able to get her to promise she'd let him watch Sawyer come the next morning, so she could get some sleep, Kate put on a Patsy Cline record. Glad to hear music again, she began to sing along as she proceeded to mash up some mangos for Sawyer.

Crazy
Crazy for feeling so lonely
I'm crazy
Crazy for feeling so blue

She could relate to Cline's solitude, having felt so lonely while Sawyer had been away. After all, there was a connection between them; he was the only one like her on this island. The only other person that didn't belong, he had once said. And she agreed with him.

But now he was here, and she didn't want to feel alone anymore. So, even though he probably couldn't hear her, she started to talk to him.

"You hungry? I'm just going to mash you up some fruit here. When you wake up you're going to get a kick out of me feeding you like a baby," she said, amused at the idea.

Sawyer suddenly grunted in his sleep, his jaw clenching. He probably was hurting and Kate put her hand over his, painfully aware it was the only thing she could do to comfort him. He was really pale, his hair was messy and dirty, plus there were dark circles under his eyes. She hated to see him so frail.

He groaned once more and turned his head to face her. For a split second, she thought he was going to open his eyes and suddenly it dawned on her that she didn't know how he'd react if he woke up to find her taking care of him. Was he still angry with her? The last time she had seen him was by the fire, when he had told her there wasn't anything worth staying on the island for. She cringed at the memory. Of course he had the right to be angry with her. She had threatened to take his spot on the raft even though she could feel how much he needed to leave. But did he have to say she wasn't worth staying for? Had he meant it? Was it the real reason why he had left?

Somehow she didn't think so. There had to be something a lot deeper to push him away, to get him to risk his life out on the ocean. Did it still have to do with his self-loathing?

Anyhow, she had been hurt by his statement and, she had to admit, angry with him. Not so much for exposing who she really was, or for ruining her only chance of escape. No, the main reason she was angry with him was for not caring about their bond. About her.

She hadn't realised that right away. Even after he had left the island, she had remained irritated with him… until Claire found the bottle containing the messages that had been aboard the raft. Up to that moment, she had had the gut feeling that she would end up seeing him again one day, that their story wasn't over. But then she had to face the facts: he was probably dead, dead without knowing how she truly felt about him.

Worry
Why do I let myself worry
Wondering
What in the world did I do

Her anger had disappeared then, to be replaced by an immense sadness. Would he have left if she had told him she had feelings for him?

The song was still playing and, listening to it, she realised she knew the answer to that question.

Crazy
For thinking that my love could hold you
I'm crazy for trying
Crazy for crying
And I'm crazy
For loving you

The answer was 'yes'.

As they had arranged, Jack came back early the next morning, and she finally agreed to get some sleep on the couch while Jack stayed in the bedroom with Sawyer. But her sleep was uneasy and it only had been a few hours when she decided to go check on Sawyer.

Jack was taking his temperature when she entered.

"Hey," she greeted him.

He raised a surprised eyebrow.

"Hey, what are you doing here? Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Any change?"

He gazed at the thermometer he was holding and announced:

"The fever has started to go down."

"Does that mean he's going to be okay?" she asked, afraid of hearing the answer.

Jack sighed.

"He's not out of the woods yet, but he seems to be responding to the antibiotics."

Suddenly, it was like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. He would recover. Maybe he would never love her, but at least he'd live.

"I'll stay with him."

Jack shook his head.

"Kate, you've only slept a few hours. You need more than that," he said reproachfully.

"I'm not tired."

Knowing it was a lost cause, Jack tried something else. At least it would get her out of the hatch for a while.

"Then go out and get him more fruit."

Kate sighed.

"Okay, but I'll be right back."

Although she hated to admit it, it did feel good to get out of the hatch. It was a beautiful day and she breathed the fresh air with delight as she headed into the jungle to find some mangos. She suddenly heard some noise to her right: it was Michael.

"Hey, Kate! Long time no see!"

"Michael, hi! I'm glad you're back…"

She hesitated for a second before adding:

"I learned about Walt. I'm so sorry… We'll get him back, you'll see."

"Yeah…"

He nodded slowly, his eyes filled with sadness. He obviously didn't want to expend upon the subject, so he asked:

"How's Sawyer?"

"Still unconscious."

Michael pondered on the information before putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"He'll pull through, Kate, if only to annoy us."

They smiled to each other until they heard footsteps. Looking at the tough looking woman coming towards them, Kate suspected it was the 'Ana-Lucia' Locke had told her about. Glancing at Michael who didn't seem too pleased to see her, she knew her guess was right.

"You must be Kate. I'm Ana," she said to Kate, extending her hand.

But Kate didn't move. Locke hadn't left out the details of how she had wanted to leave Sawyer to die on the jungle floor and that was something she just couldn't get past.

"You're the one who killed Shannon," she said coldly.

Ana removed her hand and put it in the back pocket of her jeans.

"It was an accident," she replied, not looking sorry in the least to Kate.

"Right."

Ana-Lucia had no retort and asked:

"How's the cowboy doing?"

"Since when do you care?" Michael snapped.

Before Ana could reply, Kate answered her question.

"He'll pull through, but no thanks to you."

Aware that she hadn't found a friend in Kate, Ana-Lucia turned away and left. Both Kate and Michael stared after her. Kate wouldn't have wanted to be in her shoes. Killing Shannon probably had been an accident, but Kate couldn't help but think this woman meant trouble.

"Kate?" Michael said after a moment. "Are you going back to the hatch? I was going there to tell Jack that Shannon's funeral would begin shortly…"

"I'll tell him," she replied before heading to the mango tree.

She couldn't wait to go back to Sawyer.

"Sorry, man, I know this hurts," Jack said to a stirring Sawyer as he cleaned his wound. "Michael told me you pulled the bullet out with your bare hands. You'll have to show me how to do that sometime," he said, unable to hide his admiration for Sawyer's guts.

Ever since Sawyer had told him about his encounter with his dad, Jack just couldn't despise the man as much as he once had. Perhaps Sawyer wasn't all bad after all… but that didn't mean they could ever be friends. Respect each other, maybe, but no more.

Jack was finally done with the cleaning and was about to get new bandages when Sawyer whispered:

"Where is she?"

His eyes were still closed; he was talking in his sleep.

"Where is she?" he repeated.

Of course, Jack could guess who he was talking about.

"You mean Kate. She's been watching over you ever since you got here. The only way I could get rid of her was to send her out to get some food for you."

"I love her…" he murmured.

Jack froze. Had he heard right?

"I love her," Sawyer repeated more clearly.

This time there was no way around it: he had heard right. A bit shaken, Jack sat down. Of course he suspected Sawyer had feelings for Kate. But to hear him admit he loved her was something else entirely.

But he didn't have time to dwell on it. He heard the hatch door close and quick footsteps approaching. Kate.

"How is he?" she asked, panting, as she came into the bedroom. She evidently had hurried back and that only made Jack feel more depressed.

"The fever is still going down. He'll be fine."

Not thinking, he added, "He even mumbled something-"

He stopped, cursing himself for saying that. What was he thinking? He wasn't going to be the one to tell her that Sawyer loved her, no way.

"About what?" she wondered.

Thinking fast, Jack replied:

"Uh… He said something about kicking Ana-Lucia's… you know."

Fresh from her less than pleasing meeting with Ana, Kate couldn't help but chuckle.

"I can't say I blame him."

Although Jack was sad for Ana, Michael had told him about the way she had treated Sawyer. He knew she could be quite… difficult. He smiled widely.

"I see you met her."

"Yes," she replied, returning his smile. But a second later she sobered up. "Jack, you should get down to the beach for… for Shannon."

"I was actually thinking that I should stay and watch Sawyer," Jack said. What if Sawyer woke up and repeated that he loved Kate? He looked down, feeling guilty. It wasn't the right thing to do, he knew it. But a part of him just didn't want Kate to know how Sawyer truly felt about her. Maybe then he'd still have a chance with her?

"You said he was better. I'll stay with him," she said resolutely and right away Jack knew he had lost her. Sawyer was all she could think about and deep down he probably had always known that. He had to give up.

"Okay, I'll go. But Kate… After the funeral, I'll come back and then you'll have to rest some more. You're not serving him well by exhausting yourself."

She was already sitting by Sawyer's side, her eyes not leaving him. Absently, she replied:

"Fine."

Jack sighed internally and left. Kate would never be his.

After the funeral, Jack had came back to watch Sawyer again. By then she really was extremely tired and didn't fight him. She left the hatch to go and get some sleep inside her tent. She hadn't mentioned Sawyer talking again in his sleep, and Jack felt relieved. And also a bit guilty.

A few hours went by and Jack was expecting Kate to come back any minute. She had already been gone longer than he would have thought she would. He closed his eyes for a second, rubbing them. He could use a nap, too, he though, until he heard a teasing voice:

"Since you certainly wouldn't go to Hell, I'm guessing I'm still alive?"

Jack opened his eyes. Sawyer was looking at him, a smile playing on his lips.

"Can't hide anything from you, Sawyer."

Sawyer's smile widened, only to fade as he looked around.

"I'm in a bunk-bed? Are we saved?" he asked, suddenly serious.

Jack shook his head.

"No, we're not."

He had barely finished his sentence when Kate came in, saying:

"Okay, Jack, my turn."

She stopped dead as she gazed at Sawyer and saw him smiling widely at her, dimples showing.

"You may be very pretty, Doc, but I'd have preferred if her face had been the first I'd seen when I woke up," he drawled, obviously happy to see her.

At first, Kate returned his grin, but it quickly disappeared.

Turning her back to Jack and Sawyer, she ran out.