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"Potter," James said quietly in his ear hours later. He waited all of a minute, then sang "All right. You asked for it."
A huge weight fell onto Harry's stomach and moved around rather quickly, bouncing and jumping
Harry sat up like a bullet, "What?" he snapped.
"School," James said lamely.
Harry looked at his legs and saw Sirius in dog form, now laying innocently on his lap. Harry scratched him behind the ears absently.
"Thanks," he said gratefully. He hadn't even heard his alarm.
Harry chastised himself. He needed to be more alert than that. When he got back to his own time, Voldemort's leftover cronies would still be after him.
Sirius' tail wagged wildly, thoroughly enjoying having his ears scratched…and being on Harry's lap. None of the Marauders treated him like a dog when he was one, so this was rather new.
"All right," Harry said quietly. He shoved Sirius off of his legs and stood up slowly.
Sirius saw the tattoo of himself lounging on Harry's left shoulder-blade and transformed human, grinning.
"Are you sure we didn't meet in another life? I swear that's me!" he exclaimed, still staring at the tattoo.
Harry looked over his shoulder at the lounging dog. "Nope," he lied easily and ably.
Sirius shrugged and grabbed his bag. "Hurry up!" he whined, "We've got to get to breakfast!"
Harry laughed, "Okay," he said.
He dug his robes out of his trunk and pulled them on hastily. He didn't even have a bag, because he didn't have any books because he wasn't planning on going to school this year. But he did have his wand.
"I should probably talk to Dumbledore…" he mused. Sirius shrugged again, then the Marauders plus Harry walked to the Great Hall.
Harry strode straight to the heads table to talk to Dumbledore.
"Professor?" he asked uncomfortably, "Because of… that thing I told you about yesterday, I don't have any books,"
Dumbledore nodded, "I thought about that. Your books should be here by now, I ordered them last night."
Harry was genuinely surprised. Being around the Weasleys taught him that everything was too expensive. "Thank you, sir!" he exclaimed.
"Of course," Dumbledore said simply. "I think they'll find you,"
He had a twinkle in his eye that Harry had grown unaccustomed to in the long years since he'd seen the man. Harry smiled one more time, then turned around and bounded towards the Marauders.
Harry plopped down in his seat and shoveled breakfast into his mouth. McGonagall came around with their schedules, and Harry looked at it disdainfully. He'd barely finished his own seventh year, being slightly preoccupied with saving the wizarding world, but he still knew all of this stuff.
"Look at that owl!" Peter exclaimed. Harry looked up at the swarm of brown birds soaring overhead. There was a spot of white among them all, and Harry felt his spirits soar even higher.
"Hedwig!" he cried as that familiar snowy owl settled before him with a huge bundle.
He wanted to congratulate her on making it to the past with him, but couldn't see how without revealing that he had gone anywhere.
She hooted softly, and he ripped open the package. There was a stack of books, a bag and a note from Ron and Hermione.
Harry, it's great to know you're alright. Dumbledore contacted us somehow through our fireplace, and told us what happened. We figured out how to send these, but we're not sure how to get you back yet. See, we can only send things there, not bring them back. But don't worry. We're working on it.
That was all in Hermione's tidy handwriting, but here Ron's messy scrawl was added.
What she means is that she's working on it. I know you'd prefer to be there anyways. We'll keep owling you.
Love: Ron and Hermione
"Fine." Harry said happily. Hedwig nipped his finger happily, "You're staying?" he asked. The owl hooted, "Fantastic!" Harry exclaimed. "I expect you'll want to go find something to eat?" he asked.
He let her eat his bacon, but knew that she wouldn't be satisfied with just that. The owl swooped off to the Forest to find breakfast, and Harry threw his books into his bag.
"Your owl?" James asked unnecessarily.
"Yeah," Harry answered happily.
Even if he was more than a few years younger than he planned, everything was so right, it was wonderful. He was there, at Hogwarts, with the Princes of Prank… which happened to include the gorgeous Sirius Black.
"Transfiguration," Sirius growled, but James beamed. That was his favorite subject.
The whole day they were talked to about how their NEWT year was positively their most important, and how they'd better not slack off. It was sort of a waste of time in Harry's eyes. He'd already done it.
"Hey, we've got to get back at Snivellus," Sirius said at dinner with a low voice that almost growled.
Harry smiled at the tone of that boys voice. It was wonderfully rustic. "What about Bellatrix?" he asked. He was more interested in pranking the woman who killed Sirius than his Potions professor.
Sirius grimaced, "Can't. she'll go tell her parents, who'll tell my parents, who'll come here and kill me."
Harry raised an eyebrow. He was very good at playing dumb.
"I was kicked out of my house, but that's all right. The Potters adopted me. Unfortunately, even though my real parents would have no right, they'd still come after me for doing anything to my cousin." His electric eyes sizzled with contempt. It appeared that he was more upset that they would intrude on his life, than that he'd been shoved out of theirs.
"Oh…" Harry said quietly.
It was really remarkable how used to this Sirius seemed. It was as if he didn't even care about it. But Harry could tell that his Marauders had helped him through it, and he was fine now as long as he had them.
"All right, what so you want to do to Snape?" he asked, excitement bubbling in his chest. He hadn't gotten around to much pranking in his own time at school, and now he got to start with the greatest prankers of all time! How fantastic!
"Not sure," Sirius said, "Prongs?"
James took a hasty look around the Great Hall, then whispered "We'll figure it out tonight," Sirius looked up like a dog who'd just caught scent of a rabbit, and spotted his cousin walking towards them. She stopped behind Harry, and looked down at the top of his head.
"Hello," she said almost humbly, "I'm ever so sorry about last night," She was speaking mainly to Harry, who hadn't acknowledged that she was there at all.
"Excuse me?" she asked, trying so hard to capture the attention of the boy.
Though his attention the previous night had been far from happy, it was exciting. She needed another hit. She craved his gaze. She had fallen for him. How terrible that he hated her.
Harry turned towards her slowly, without even the slightest trace of a smile. "Yes?" he asked seriously.
Bellatrix lowered her head a fraction like a flinch. "I just wanted to tell you that… any descendant of the Dark Lord is all right with us."
Harry's lips turned into a sneer, his eyes even colder. "A descendant of who?" he asked.
"Voldemort," she whispered. "Lord Voldemort. There is a… group of his followers, mostly in Slytherin. You should come and meet us. Anybody who speaks 'it' is welcome." She said quietly.
"I don't know what you mean." Harry said coldly, "Speaks what?"
Bellatrix's eyes grew wary. "Parseltounge," she whispered. Harry stood up, towering almost half a foot over her.
"I am sorry. I did not mean to anger you," she said quickly, then she ran away, to the Slytherin table. Harry turned back to the Marauders and sat down like nothing had happened.
"Woah," Sirius whispered.
Harry's gaze was so serious. He managed to look gorgeous all the time! No matter what he was feeling, or saying, it always made sense. He always made Sirius agree. He always made Sirius fall for him just a little more. Every glance pulled him in deeper.
"I know," James said quietly.
Remus looked puzzled, "What did she mean, 'mostly in Slytherin'?" he asked.
Harry longed to tell him that he was sitting right next to the one who wasn't a Slytherin, but he kept his mouth shut.
"Obviously," James said, "She meant that some of them are in a different house. My bet's on Ravenclaw."
Peter looked nervous.
"Don't worry, Pete," Sirius said confidently, "We won't let them get you."
But that didn't seem to comfort the boy, whose beady little eyes continued scanning the Great Hall.
"Hmm," Harry grunted.
Sirius' electric blue eyes found his emerald green ones, and they held eye contact for a moment before Harry broke it, looking down at his plate. He couldn't help them prank anybody without running the risk of exposure or changing the past. Naturally, he would anyways, but it was terribly dangerous.
Sirius looked down uneasily. Harry's eyes were so troubled. It was hard for Sirius to know that something had happened to Harry and he couldn't know about it.
What he didn't realize is how hard that was for Harry.
This was the man that he'd trusted so much that it lead to Sirius' demise. It felt so strange for him not to know everything about his life.
"All right," Remus said almost an hour later.
He stood in front of his trunk and was pulling things out.
The Map, a few notebooks, a few pranking props, a spell book or two, and a few first drafts for the Marauders map.
"Woah," Harry muttered, "What is all of that?"
"The Marauders secret stash," Sirius said wisely, who was sitting on Harrys bed beside him. James and Peter sat on James' bed across from them and were waiting anxiously for Remus to finish dragging things across the room to them.
"It's all in Remus' trunk so that nobody will suspect," Peter explained helpfully.
"All right," Remus said again, "We've got the minutes from all of our meetings. The Map, obviously. A few books I picked up this summer. A whole notebook full of things that irritate Snivellus, compliments of Padfoot," Sirius took a tiny bow, "A list of all the names we've ever called him. And these notebooks are all of our pranks."
He looked excited. The first prank of the year. "Oh, and this one's each of the houses Common Room passwords."
Sirius grabbed that piece of paper from Remus and looked like he was memorizing it. It was a pretty cool little bit of parchment, which automatically changed to the new password as new ones were installed.
"where do we start?" Remus asked.
James had a similar expression of joy, anxiety and excitement. He couldn't wait either. "I vote that we should remember everything that we've already done to him. Oh, we also have to recognize a newcomer."
Remus nodded, "Harry Potter. You are about to bear witness to a great lot of pranking genius. With that privaledege comes a bit of responsibility. You are officially under oath to say nothing to anyone. You may not tell anybody what we're doing or when we're doing it. You may not rat us out. You must help prank Snivellus to your best capability. You must," then Sirius cut him off.
"Just act like a Marauder, All right?" he asked impatiently. He trusted Harry completely. It was impossible not to.
Harry grinned, "Sure," he said.
Remus rolled his eyes. "If he doesn't agree to it, he doesn't have to do it," he insisted, and Harry thought of how much he sounded like Hermione.
"Okay," Peter said, "We've already…" he took a deep breath and Sirius looked like he couldn't wait for Harry to hear what they'd done to the boy. "Dressed him up, plastered Gryffindor colors all over his Common Room, turned his underwear red, painted him gold, made him speak gibberish for three days, washed his hair in Transfiguration, Potions, History of Magic, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Herbology-"
Sirius interrupted him, "That really ticked him off," he reminded everyone.
James grinned, "Don't forget the nicknames,"
"But that isn't all that's we've done!" Peter protested.
"We all know what we've done!" James insisted, "If Harry suggests something we've done we just won't do it again." Peter sighed.
Remus smiled slightly, "I suppose that the question has become: How do we keep it original? Of course, we could repeat something that really mortified him in smaller increments,"
"Huh?" Sirius asked.
"We could wash one strand of hair every day," Remus explained.
Sirius nodded with comprehension, "But how could we manage that?"
Remus looked confused, "I wasn't actually suggesting that," he informed them, "It's boring."
Harry grinned, "But it would remind him to beware of the Marauders. And if you did it every Divination hour, he would hate that subject, too."
Sirius looked just about ready to kiss him. Which he actually may have been, whether or not he would admit it to himself.
"That's brilliant!" he exclaimed, "Remus, you're a genius,"
Sirius had to give credit to Remus. That way, he couldn't be accused of favoring Harry. Which he did.
"Well…" Remus admitted modestly. "I agree, though. Every Divination. Who still takes that class?"
"I got kicked out," Sirius pointed out. He smiled as if reminiscing that brilliant moment in history.
"Me too," James said.
"I failed out," Peter said quietly.
"I dropped it." Remus said, "Harry?"
Harry looked around the room at each of their hopeful faces. "I guess I could do it. I wasn't planning to go, but sure. For you." He didn't specify, but he meant Sirius.
Sirius beamed, "Brilliant! What else can we do?"
Remus laughed, "Isn't that good enough?"
"No!" Sirius exclaimed.
Harry's eyes lit up even more just then, "How about after each strand is washed, it turns red or gold?" he suggested.
Sirius grabbed the boy in a hug, "You're a genius too!" he cried.
Harry hugged him back weakly. Sirius' embrace revealed his slightly hidden muscles that clenched him tightly to the blue eyed boy's hard chest.
"Um, thanks," he didn't think he'd ever actually been called that.
A moment later, Sirius reluctantly let him go and looked over at James, who immediately knew that the two of them had to have a very serious talk.
"Okay, tomorrow?" Sirius suggested, already wary of whatever James might say.
"Sure," Harry agreed. "But you lot won't even be able to see it!"
"With any luck, neither will he." Remus said, "He'll be sitting there and not even notice. The next day and the next day, and the next day, and then finally, there'll be enough red and gold that he'll notice and not know what happened!" He was positively hysterical.
Harry smiled, "Yeah, but what happens if he catches me?"
"Kill him," Sirius retorted with a huge grin on his face, "What can he do to you?" James noted the expression on both boys faces when they met eyes.
"I'll take that as a vote of confidence. Hey, can I read these?" Harry asked the group.
"Sure," Remus said, "we've got to use them somehow,"
"Oh, I know a pair of twins who'd be thrilled to read a sentence of this…" Harry muttered, thinking of Fred and George, whose prank store was still booming.
"Oh?" Peter asked, "Who?"
"Um… No one," Harry said quickly. Hedwig flew in the window a moment later with a parcel in her beak. "What's this?" he asked as she dropped the package on his lap and flew up to his shoulder. "Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes… They didn't," he opened the box and found that they had. The Wesley twins had sent him all sort of pranking devices with a note on the top.
Thought you could use these. Good luck with old Snape. Say hello to the Marauders from us. Mums in a panic for you. Watch it, or she'll bring you back.
Don't you dare try to pay us.
Fred
George
Ps: we mean it!
Pss: make sure we get that map!
Psss: we sent you your cloak too, figured you might need it
Pssss: thank us later
Harry laughed, "Check it out," he said quietly. There was a good amount of U-NO-POO (the constipation sensation that's gripping the nation), an enormous stock of trick wands, a few Daydream Charms, almost ten Skiving Snackboxes, a shield hat and even two Edible Dark Marks (they'll make anyone sick!) Oh, and his Invisibility Cloak.
"Woah," Sirius said incredulously, "where'd you get all that?"
"Um… those twins I mentioned," Harry said happily. He popped open a Snackbox and threw a puking pastille to Peter.
"They've got a joke shop in Diagon Alley… they were thinking about putting one in Hogsmeade when-" Harry was spared finding a stopping point before mentioning Umbridge by Peter immediately hurling uncontrollably.
"Harry!" James exclaimed, "What…?"
Harry threw an orange candy over to him, "Shove that one down his throat," he advised half-heartedly. James wildly tipped back Peter's head (nearly drowning the boy) and dropped in the candy. Peter stopped puking, coughed a few more times, and looked like nothing had happened.
"What?" James asked, "What is that?"
"A Skivving Snackbox," Harry said dully, "Gets you out of class, guarantied." He didn't mention that these were invented twenty years in the future.
"Wow," muttered Sirius, who was still digging through the contents of Harry's box, seemingly oblivious to the fact that it was still on his lap. But he did know. And he had no intention of stopping.
Sirius yanked out a large, billowy cloak and stared at it for awhile. "Harry…" he said quietly.
"Yeah?" he asked, while pouring over the description of a Daydream Charm box. The dream was a new one. Something about killing Voldemort, and Harry was making sure that he wasn't mentioned by name.
"This is an Invisibility Cloak," he said.
Harry looked over, "Yeah. They sent it for me. I must've forgotten it at home," he said quickly. Honestly, he thought he'd put it in his trunk.
"And what're these?" Remus asked. He'd begun sorting through the box as well.
"They look like Edible Dark Marks." Harry explained tiredly, "Would it help if I just dumped it out?"
It was fine if Sirius wanted to look through the box while it was on his lap, but with Remus there, it just felt weird.
Sirius secretly felt the same way. He'd gotten rather jealous the moment that Remus started looking. Remus nodded sheepishly and Harry tipped over the box onto his bedspread.
"If I knew those were in here, I would've suggested using them on Snivellus." Harry said half heartedly, "Assuming that he hasn't got one already."
"Huh?" James asked. He'd gotten up and was sorting through the boxes contents.
Harry smiled, "What if he doesn't know how you get a Dark Mark?" he asked, "We could get him to eat one of these to 'be accepted into Voldemorts inner circle'… What?" he asked. All four boys were staring at him with equally shocked expressions on their faces.
"You… You said his name!" Peter said quietly.
Harry tried hard not to laugh and say 'Yeah, well. When I killed him, I obtained that right.' But he held it in.
"Um… yeah?" he asked, "Fear of the name only increases fear of the thing itself." Dumbledore and Hermione had said that, so he figured it would be safe to say it now.
"That's what Dumbledore said." Remus remembered, "But that's Dumbledore. He can say whatever he wants."
Harry raised an eyebrow. It was surprising to think that years before Voldemort gained enough support to really do some damage, these kids were afraid of him. It was disgusting.
"If it bothers you, I won't say it anymore," he offered quietly.
"Thanks," Peter said, but the other boys kept their stares on Harry.
A moment later, Sirius' worried face broke out in a grin. "You're right. I don't need any more people being afraid of him. I'll say it too. Vol…Vol…Voldemor…" he gave an impatient grunt there. If Harry could do it, so could he. "Voldemort! Voldemort! Voldemort, Voldemort, Voldemort!" he leapt to his feet and did a little victory dance. He was elated that he could prove himself to Harry.
Remus nodded, "I've never thought You-know-who, it's always been Voldemort in my mind."
James grinned, "Voldemort."
They all looked over at Peter expectantly, but he couldn't utter his masters name properly. "Voldymort… Voldy… Volde… Voldemart… Moll… no, that's not right… Voldemoort?" He looked over at Remus hopefully, but he just shook his head. Peter had to sort this one out for himself. "Voldymort…is that close enough?"
"No," Sirius said distantly.
"Hey!" Harry exclaimed, "That's my Daydream!"
"Yeah," Sirius muttered. Harry rolled his eyes. He'd been there the first time anyways. What did he care if Sirius got to see what happened? He just hoped that it showed the person who cast the spell on himself defeating Voldemort, not Harry.
"It's not close enough." Harry said, "Just say it… Voldemort. It's not so hard,"
Of course, that was said by the person who'd murdered Voldemort, so it was a little easier for him that one of his mindless drones and cronies who again and again came after Harry until eventually, he was forced to kill them before they killed him.
Peter scrunched up his face, "I can't do it!" he exclaimed angrily.
Harry didn't care that the little rat was getting angry at him. He wanted to be hexed and cursed. He could handle it. He just wanted to fight back.
"Come on, Wormtail," Remus said encouragingly, "Vol…de…mort," he said, emphasizing every syllable.
"I can't do it!" Peter cried.
"Sure you can," Sirius said distractedly.
Those Charms had really gotten better. Harry remembered a time when you drooled and didn't say anything. Didn't blink or breathe very much when you took that charm, and now he looked a little out of it, but overall he was normal.
His electric blue eyes had lost that silver-ish touch that Harry loved so much, but it wasn't so apparent when he was bored either, so really, he was just fine.
"Sirius?" Harry muttered. He wanted to see how much it took for him to notice that someone was calling his name.
"Padfoot?" James asked a little louder than Harry, catching on. Again, the boy continued staring off stupidly. "Siri?" he asked.
Remus smiled, "Sirius Black, you are in detention forever!" he exclaimed with a very good McGonagall impression.
"Huh?" Sirius asked vacantly.
"Detention." Harry said, "Forever? No more cursing Snivellus, and no more broom cupboards," he said.
"What?" Sirius snapped, the silver touch returning to his electric blue eyes.
"No more broom cupboards," Harry repeated.
Sirius made a face, "Why?" he whined. He had the sudden urge to pull Harry into one of those marvelous little structures.
Harry grinned, "How'd you like the Daydream?"
"It was amazing!" Sirius exclaimed, "It was so… Wow. But I have a question… Why would you defeat Voldemort?" he asked.
"Huh?" Harry asked.
"In the Daydream." Sirius explained, "You were defeating Voldemort! It was fantastic! There was this huge battle and a cute redhead" What he didn't mention was that that redhead was Ron, "And something about a… horcrux? It was amazing! I don't get it. why would you be in there?"
Harry hesitated, "Uh… I don't know. I guess the twins thought I'd be the one to open the box," Wow, that was a good lie.
Sirius shrugged, "What's a horcrux?" he asked.
"Sort of an imortalizer," Harry explained. "You put part of your soul inside it. But it's a terrible half life, or in Voldemort's case, a seventh of a life. You've got to kill people. One for each horcrux. Anyways, you're immortal until each of the horcruxes is destroyed. After that you're just a normal person…" Harry realized just then that he shouldn't have known so much about them.
"Oh," Remus muttered. He seemed to be piecing things together, and that was dangerous for Harry.
"Um… Harry," James said uncomfortably, "You never said why you didn't tell us your real last name."
"Hmm?" Harry asked, "Oh… Uh… I don't know," he lied quickly, "Haven't you ever wanted to be someone else?"
"Sure," Peter said, "I've wanted to be Captain America,"
Sirius raised an eyebrow at the boy for a moment, then turned over to Harry, who he was still sitting next to. "But it wasn't much of a change," he pointed out.
Harry smiled weakly, "No, I suppose not."
"So why bother?" Sirius asked.
That boy didn't make much sense. He was very nice looking, and very nice sounding, but he didn't make sense at all. (Those very's should probably have been very's)
"Well, I don't know," Harry said confusedly.
"To escape your other life?" Remus asked wisely.
"I guess," Harry replied.
Remus kept an unwavering stare straight at Harry's eyes. It made him nervous, but he didn't show it. He returned it with a stare of his own.
"A life… where you did something that you maybe shouldn't have done?" he asked.
"No…" Harry said quietly, "I definitely should've," he said half-heartedly. "I should probably go… get that divination thing worked out," he said hastily before sprinting out of the room.
"What is with that kid?" James snapped.
Sirius had an odd expression on his face, "I should go help," he said.
"Do you want me to go?" Peter asked helpfully.
"No!" Sirius snapped, "Um… no. No thanks," he said more friendly.
He slipped out of the room silently and went after Harry where he knew that he would go. To the Shrieking Shack.
It was as if something was screaming at him to go meet the boy in that depressing little house in Hogsmead, and though he didn't know it, Harry was.
He wanted Sirius there. He wanted to tell him everything. He wanted for him to understand.
Sirius transformed into his Animagus form and ran for the Whomping Willow that concealed the passage to the Shrieking Shack.
Harry ran in Animagus form at full speed until he reached the base of the Whomping Willow. It would be so much bigger when he went to Hogwarts, so much like Voldemort.
He raced forward and pressed the part of the tree that would halt its swinging branches and crawled down into the narrower passage, then bolted forward to the Shrieking Shack. He raced upstairs to that bedroom where Sirius dragged Ron and laid down on the bed, panting.
He heard the pounding footsteps that announced that someone was in that house with him. 'Great,' he thought to himself, 'Company' but that was just what he wanted.
Somewhere in his mind he was sending out cries for help and for Sirius. And that was what he got.
Minutes later, the shaggy black dog found him and hopped up onto the bed beside him. Only then did they transform human.
"Hi," Sirius said quietly.
"Hi," Harry returned with the completely miserable expression of a child who'd misplaced their parents.
"What really happened?" Sirius asked, knowing that he didn't have anywhere near the full story.
He wanted to make it all better. Wanted to make those beautiful green eyes glimmer with happiness and excitement again.
And he couldn't. He couldn't make it better. He couldn't even understand what he wanted to make better. Couldn't understand what was bothering Harry.
Harry sighed, "I don't know if you can handle it," he said.
"Why not?" Sirius begged, but his voice was so solemn that it could not coax a smile out of Harry's usually so lit up and happy face.
"It's a really sad…life," he answered.
"But I want to hear it," Sirius insisted quietly.
Harry gazed into Sirius' silver-ish eyes. He seemed to mean it. It was refreshing to speak with someone who was genuinely curious. Harry loved that about Sirius.
Harry blinked slowly at the boy lying beside him on that bed and decided that if he wanted to hear it, he definitely could.
"You have to understand that you can't tell anybody… not Prongs, not Moony, not Wormtail," he forced himself not to grimace at the name.
"I promise," Sirius pledged.
"Well…" Harry said seriously. He lifted his bangs briefly before lowering them to cover that lightning bolt shaped mystery.
"This is a scar… and it's from the killing curse. When I was thirteen months old, Voldemort stormed my house acting on a prophecy about the two of us… He killed both of my parents, and tried to kill me, too. But my mother stopped him. She died trying to save me, and that love made me untouchable."
He paused for a second, thinking of exactly what he could tell Sirius without telling him everything, but he really, really did want to tell him everything. His eyes were so innocent and imploring… Harry cut off his thoughts. There had to be a limit to how much Sirius could effect him.
"I met Voldemort again… almost every year after I turned eleven. In sixth year I started working on getting rid of his horcruxes. Making him mortal."
"As mortal as a mad killer can get," Sirius grunted. He was trying to get Harry to smile.
Harry wanted so badly to smile, "I succeeded a few years ago… and the month after I did… I killed him." he said quietly.
"No, you didn't." Sirius informed him, "He's still alive. He just killed twelve people in London,"
"Yes, I did," Harry said almost silently, "In my own time, he's dead. Sirius, I don't know how, but I was sent back in time… I was going to Hogwarts to be a Defense Professor, then… well, this happened." His voice was filled with so much remorse that Sirius couldn't help but reach over and hug him.
Harry fell into his arms for a minute or two with almost happiness before he remembered the reason for which he received the hug.
"Don't worry about me, though. It's just really hard not to tell anyone… especially when you lot get around to my name…"
"You're James' son…" Sirius said, more like a fact than a question, but he looked into the eyes of the boy that he still hadn't let go of, his own eyes full of questions.
"yes." Harry answered, "James Potter and Lily Evans." Sirius' eyes widened, "That's why it's so important to get them together,"
Sirius took another look into those emerald green eyes and almost understood the pain that they held. He wanted to dive into those eyes, he wanted to light them up and make them happy, but he couldn't. He couldn't do anything but just sit there, nearly in the boys lap with the force that he hugged him.
"And… the tattoo?" he asked slowly.
"It's you," Harry said almost obviously, "You knew that,"
Sirius nodded. Something inside of him did know. "And the dragon?" he asked with a tiny smile.
Harry had a tiny smile too, "my first girlfriend suggested it… my only girlfriend, we didn't last very long… She couldn't understand that she couldn't get in my way… She couldn't fight Voldemort for me," Sirius waited for something more, something about him or about Harry's new love interest, but nothing was said.
"And now?" Sirius prompted.
Harry longed to say that it was all about Sirius. That he could never even think about another girl when he had the perfect boy right beside him, but he didn't.
He didn't say a thousand perfect things that wanted to pour from lips. He didn't say anything. He just hugged the boy back with the same force that he was being hugged, and tried to clear his mind.
It wasn't fair for Sirius to be forced to react to any Occlumens that Harry employed. He certainly seemed as if he liked Harry, and Harry knew that he liked Sirius a lot. He couldn't resist those bright blue eyes.
Harry gently stroked his long black hair and felt the boy stiffen slightly in his arms. He retracted his hands and leapt up from the bed with incredible speed.
"I'm sorry," he muttered hastily. He felt terrible. Of course Sirius couldn't feel that way about him.
Sirius' eyes found Harry's, "No, I just… I just realized… I have a girlfriend,"
Harry froze for a moment or two, then broke out laughing loud and long. "You… You what?" he asked through his chuckles, his eyes swimming with tears.
He had to laugh. It was the only way that Sirius wouldn't see the hurt. A girlfriend. Not boyfriend. Not even a chance for Harry.
Sirius shrugged, "It's not like she means anything… Not like you," he whispered.
Harry felt something flip in his stomach, and recalled that only happening once or twice in fourth year… With Cedric.
"A girlfriend… Wow," Harry muttered.
"What about that redhead?" Sirius asked accusatorily.
Harry snorted, "Ron? He's engaged to Hermione!"
Sirius laughed, "Yeah, that'd be a problem…" Harry nodded and considered going back to sit next to the boy, but then Sirius stood and walked over to him.
"I don't know what you're going to tell the female population," Harry said quietly.
Sirius smiled, "I'll tell them I've retired,"
Harry's eyes lit up, nearly shooting off the fireworks that screamed to burst inside of him. He took one of Sirius' hands and closed the distance between them.
His lips met Sirius' in such a gentle way that it sent a whole new set of shivers down his spine.
Sirius closed his eyes slowly, the intense pleasure from the contact of their lips making something explode like a time bomb and send a rush of warmth straight to his toes. His stomach flipped over and he was in heaven.
Slowly, he deepened the kiss and slipped his tongue forward. Harry eagerly accepted his entrance and kissed back passionately.
"Excuse me?" someone said behind them. Harry leapt away from Sirius, landing several feet to his left, then looked over in alarm at James Potter.
"Hello," Harry said quietly, staring at the floor embarrassedly.
"Hi," James said uncomfortably, "I was just going to talk to Sirius."
Sirius noted the lack of nickname with concern. "Um… what?" he asked.
James shot him a look, and Harry raised his gaze for an instant, "I should go," he muttered, then he transformed into a lion and ran full speed out of there.
He made it out of the Shrieking Shack, out of the Whomping Willow completely, and headed deeper into the forest. He ran past a few more familiar places. That pond, that huge rock, that frightening tree, and he even glanced at that disgusting colony of spiders that Ron in particular was terrified of.
He stopped by a rock that looked new and leapt up to the top, landing gracefully on all four of his legs.
He laid down, still panting, and rested. That was bad.
He hadn't even heard James enter. Had he heard anything of his story?
Why did he have to tell Sirius? Why couldn't he push his feelings aside? How difficult would it be when he went back to his own time and re-learned that Sirius was dead? Would he be as difficult to get over as Cedric was? Voldemort took Sirius away as a godfather. What would he do to the boy now?
This was irresponsible. Too many bad things could happen, and he didn't care. And what about Sirius? What would happen to him when Harry left? How would he handle it? Probably by finding more girls.
But what if he couldn't get over Harry? That was terribly big-headed, but it was true. What was Harry supposed to do? Find a time-turner to visit Sirius every week? That wasn't enough time with him.
What would Harry do when he saw that veil? Even the thought of it made Harry want to hurt someone. Made him want to scream and die. But more than anything, it made him want to cry. He'd told himself no more crying, but how was he supposed to help it? How, when he was faced with such an obstacle?
The same way that he faced that seemingly impossible task of defeating Voldemort. He'd managed that, hadn't he? But that was different. That meant being smart, and using force.
This meant that he had to accept Sirius' love, and its absence. He had to accept that he loved in return, and that soon he would love only a memory. He had to do such emotional sorts of things that he could scarcely breathe.
A snow white fleck pushed its way through the trees over Harrys head and settled on his shoulder. Harry transformed human and untied the small letter that was attached to her foot. It was from Hermione.
Good lord, Harry. What's wrong? You know, that Occlumency isn't good for anyone. I was sitting here perfectly at ease, then this terrible rush came over me and… Well, then I felt as if the whole world was coming down on me, and I knew it was you. What happened?
Harry wanted to scream at her. How was he supposed to tell her?
"Hedwig… how am I supposed to talk to her?" he asked quietly.
The owl hooted and flew off of his shoulder. Harry abandoned the letter on that rock, transformed into a lion and followed his bird.
She led him outside the abandoned Hogsmead village to that cave that Sirius lived in during Harry's fourth year. Harry transformed human and nearly collapsed. There was The Veil.
"Hermione?" he called, "Hermione, are you there?"
"Harry?" he heard, "Where are you?"
Harry laughed, "You won't believe it! I'm in that cave that Snuffles showed us in third year! That veil from the Department of Mysteries is in here!" he exclaimed.
"That's amazing, Harry," Hermione said, "You're still in that time?"
"Well, yes. Where else would I be?" Harry asked.
"Um… I don't know,"
"'Mione," Harry said slowly, "What happened?"
"Um… Nothing! Everything is great here," Hermione lied.
"Oh… Tell Fred and George thanks for the package. It's really something," Harry said appreciatively.
"Yeah, business has gone up even higher," Hermione said, her voice strangled.
"Hermione!" Harry exclaimed, "What's wrong?"
Hermione sniffled, "Nothing, just nothing." Harry remained silent for a few minutes.
"Harry! It's terrible! Everyone's out looking for you, and I went too, and Ron said that I care more about you than him, and I told him that just because I wanted you safe didn't mean I don't love him, and he left!"
Harry hesitated, "He what?" he asked, "Where?"
"I don't know!" Hermione cried, "Nobody knows! He's just gone!"
"Shh," Harry murmured, "It's all right, how can I help?"
Hermione sniffled again, "You could… you know… look for him…" she said quietly.
"Sure." Harry said, "Anything that will help. Hang on a minute,"
He reached out with his mind, calling for his best friend.
'Ronald Billius Weasley… Where the hell did you go?'
Something began materializing before him. it was a dingy pub, and nobody seemed to be speaking English. Harry couldn't make out the words, but when his vision moved around the room dizzily, he saw Ron in the corner, drinking with a few slightly too-drunk old hags.
"'Mione?" he asked quietly. "'Mione, I'm not sure where he is. Nobody's speaking English, and it's sort of blurry…"
"Oh… fantastic." Hermione huffed, "He's drunk!"
Harry bit his lip to keep from laughing, "That's not necessarily what it means… I could just not be focusing."
There was a long silence where Hermione tried not to yell at Harry. Tried not to scream that he'd better start trying.
But he didn't even know it.
He was listening to a completely different conversation back in the Shrieking Shack.
"You want to tell me something?" James asked quietly. Harry couldn't see him,
but he could see Sirius. He was blurry, but who could mistake those eyes?
"Um… no?" Sirius asked hopefully.
James sighed, "Paddie… what's going on?" he asked, "It's all right, I've sort of made my own assumptions. But I'd rather hear it from you…"
Sirius took a deep breath, "Well… I think I might love him," he muttered.
"Siri, you've only known him for a day," James said sadly.
"I know, but…" Sirius trailed off, "You remember the first day that you saw Lily? You just knew! That's exactly how I feel about Harry,"
Harry tried not to live in that ecstasy. That moment where Sirius expressed his feelings so wonderfully, so perfectly. Harry found that he wasn't breathing, and that he couldn't start. He lived in that panic-y happiness. He loved it.
James paused for a moment, waiting for Sirius to go on, "But… you've always… had girlfriends… haven't you?" he asked slowly, trying to piece together words that wouldn't fit together like parts from twelve different puzzles.
"Yeah, but…" Sirius was trying so hard to explain something that he didn't understand. Something that James didn't and couldn't and wouldn't understand. He just wanted to be accepted for it.
"I don't know… With him, it's different." He paused for a few seconds, "All of these girls… we might've… done things, but all of them combined in all of the years that I've known them…they've never made me feel the way that Harry does with a single glance,"
"Getting rather poetic, aren't you?" James asked almost accusatorily.
Sirius looked hurt, "Prongs…" he said quietly, "It's not like I want to… I just…"
"I get it," James said irritably, "But couldn't you 'just…' with a girl?"
Sirius sniffed quietly, "No," he said, his voice slightly cracked. Harry felt his heart breaking. He wanted and needed to go and comfort the boy.
"Why don't you understand?" he begged. "It's… I would never question what you feel for Lily." He suddenly yearned for Harry even more. Surely, Harry would make it all better simply by being around.
"Keep her out of this," James warned, "This has nothing to do with her! You're…. You're just…" Sirius sniffed again and James took a deep breath. "We can still be mates, can't we?" he asked quietly, uncertainly, self-consciously.
"Of course we can!" Sirius exclaimed, "Why wouldn't we?"
"I just…" James said, "I don't know if I want him in our dormitory… with you," he muttered.
Sirius laughed and ran over and hugged the boy, which looked especially odd to Harry, since he couldn't see James and it looked like Sirius was hugging air. "You're the best brother in the whole world… I love you." he said quickly.
Obviously, that love was completely brotherly. Not remotely romantic. James knew that, but even still…
"Yeah, yeah. I love you too," James said, clearly uncomfortable. "You really love him?" he asked.
"Yes," Sirius said completely certainly.
"Well… I'm happy for you. now, If you can help me get Lily, I'll be even happier," James said.
Sirius laughed again, and all was right in their world. Unfortunately, all was not right where Harry stood. Or was he even standing anymore?
"Harry!" Hermione shrieked. Hedwig bit his ear and hooted like mad.
Harry jerked like he was being tortured, "Huh?" he asked sharply.
"Harry!" Hermione shrieked again.
"Yeah?" Harry asked, rubbing his ear.
"What is wrong with you?" Hermione exclaimed, "You can't do that! Just stop talking, and Hedwig went insane and… Ugh!"
"Uh… sorry," Harry said, "What ?"
Hermione sighed, "For one thing, I wanted to see if you're all right. For another, I still don't know why I keep feeling like the world is going to fall in on me when I'm perfectly fine!" she exclaimed.
Harry grinned, "Sorry," he said insincerely, "Must've been from my end."
"Well… what happened?" Hermione asked impatiently.
Harry smiled when he got to voice his reply, "I fell in love."
A/N- Aww! I'm so happy for them! The only real question is…Which love is more important to Sirius, and whose secrets will he keep?
Love it or hate it, tell me what you think!
Dani
