Disclaimer: I don't own anything, TYVM.

A/N: Thanks to Always a Bookworm, Ultimate Ending, lovenyami, consumedbylove, Bffy519 and gaarafangirl91!! Hope you enjoy the chapter!

Oh, one important thing: For this fic, all the yamis and hikaris have separate bodies.

Job Hunting for Psychopaths: Chapter One

Bakura figured Ryo's demand would be easy enough to get around. After all, the kid left for school at an ungodly-seeming hour of the morning; who was to stop Bakura from lazing around all day like he normally did?

The answer turned out to be not a 'who', but a 'what'. A very obnoxious 'what'. Bakura was roused from sleep the following morning by an obscenely loud, high-pitched (oh, how he hated high-pitched noises) beeping.

At first he buried his head in his pillow and attempted to ignore it, but quickly found that venture impossible and switched to hunting for the source of the incessant noise. His eyes, scanning the room, happened to glance upon the digital clock on his table, which read a horrible time of five-thirty AM.

Wait. I don't own a digital clock.

He leaned closer to the alien device and sure enough, that was where the beeping was coming from. Now, how to turn it off..

The thief was in the midst of pressing random buttons in the hope that one of them would make the noise stop when Ryo walked in, looking disgustingly cheerful.

"Good morning!" he said in a tone that would sound bright to most people but to Bakura bordered on sadistic.

"Don't you 'good morning' me," he growled. "I know you had something to do with this, now tell me how to make it stop or I will rip out your insides in the most painful way I know how."

Privately wondering what the least painful method would feel like, Ryo complied and hit the magic button. The beeping ceased. Bakura reminded himself that this was why he let his hikari live. Without a word he laid back down with every intention of going straight back to sleep, but Ryo was having none of it.

"Oh no you don't," he said sternly. "You're going job hunting today, remember?"

"At five thirty in the damn morning?!" Bakura snapped incredulously. "Like hell!"

"If you want to beat the rush, then yes. If you don't apply first, you'll never get chosen. Not with your credentials."

"What credentials?" Bakura asked in the same disbelieving tone.

"Exactly," Ryo replied dryly.

Bakura rolled his eyes, extremely irritated by how this morning was progressing so far. "I am not going job hunting before the sun is even close to coming up. In fact, you can consider yourself lucky if I decide to go at all."

Ryo raised an eyebrow. "Really. You won't mind having Atem as a houseguest for awhile, then."

The thief's eye twitched horribly, but he weighed his options and forced himself to shake his head. "You can't blackmail me into this one, Ryo."

Ryo smiled sweetly and turned to leave the room. "Very well then." He paused in the doorway. "Oh, I almost forgot. I don't have a spare bedroom, so he'll have to share yours."

Bakura waited exactly half a second before bolting from the bed and spinning his hikari around by the shoulders. "Is this a joke?!" he snapped. "Make him sleep on the floor!"

"You sound like a petulant child," Ryo informed him coolly. "And I am not making a guest sleep on the floor."

Bakura suddenly had a horrible sinking feeling.

"Ready to begin your career now?" Ryo inquired slyly.

Bakura swore loudly and went to get dressed.

Ryo watched him go with a wide smile on his face.

TBC

A/N: Okay, before you shoot me, I know there was no jobhunting in this chapter, but I had to set things up properly. The real chaos shall begin next chap, promise. ^.^