Chloe's phone rang as she was shoving her active case folders back into the drawers. The caller ID showed a picture of Lucifer sexily smirking at her. As soon as Lucifer had figured out you could set a personal image for a contract, he had snatched her phone away and taken about a hundred selfies before he found one that was just right. Sometimes Chloe secretly looked at the goofy ones to cheer herself up.
"Hey Lucifer, I'm about ready to go. I just need to make a quick stop at home to pack a suitcase."
"Don't worry about that. I don't want you to lead the Russian mafia back to your apartment. I had Maze pack a bag for you."
"Wait, you asked Maze go through my clothes?" Chloe panicked, thinking about the small shoebox of toys and lube in her bedside dresser (which had sadly not opened for a long time).
"Surely that's happened before, Detective. I mean, you are roommates. I'm certain your socks have ended up next to her thongs in the drier at some point." The words were out of Lucifer's mouth before he remembered teasing the Detective might lead to a physical intimacy situation he would have to refuse. For a week. In order to satisfy his therapist's request for him to explore 'emotional intimacy', whatever that was.
"Ew." Chloe rolled her eyes and sighed before she could stop herself. Damn, that was actually the perfect opening to flirt. She had been thinking about Ella's suggestion, to just try sleeping with Lucifer and see where things went. She sort of wanted to maybe go for it? But she was so rusty at flirting. Oh well, you have to start somewhere. "Huh, well, I really hope you didn't ask Maze to grab any extra shoes." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "I've got a repurposed shoebox with some... interesting contents... that I hope she doesn't find."
Lucifer's mind immediately jumped into the gutter with a squeal. Strap-ons. Lesbian porn. Riding crops. Wait, wait, no this was the Detective, and there was no way she would be flirting with him over the phone. "Baseball cards? Don't worry, Detective, your secret's safe with me." Chloe opened her mouth to correct him, but he was already telling her details of their escape plan. "Now, I've just emailed you a airline ticket. Have one of your plainclothes co-workers give you a lift to the airport. I'll meet you there."
Lucifer didn't show up at the gate until 15 minutes into the boarding process. Chloe was fuming, and confronted him as soon as he strode into the waiting area. "Did you just post a picture of your boarding pass on Instagram?"
Lucifer grinned. "Oh, so you do follow me, Detective! What's your username? You must be going under a pseudonym."
Chloe held up her phone, showing a picture of Lucifer with his arm wrapped around the pop singer Nick Carton's shoulders. His printed boarding pass was clearly visible in his hand. "What the hell is this? You made time to have lunch with a celebrity and tell the world where we're going?"
"Well, not the world," Lucifer chuckled, checking her screen. "Only 5,847 people." He took another look at her phone. "Oh, 'mommagrizzly80'. I'll follow you."
"It's just pictures of Trixie's art projects." Chloe shook her head. "Lucifer, this is serious. It's likely the mob already knows we're going to Las Vegas."
"Good." Lucifer grabbed her elbow and steered her up to the line of last-minute boarders.
"Wait, what?" Chloe shook off his hand and moved to block his path. "Lucifer, how is you sharing our hide-out destination good?"
"Because we're not going to Las Vegas." Lucifer stepped around Chloe and handed his boarding pass to the flight attendant. He gestured at Chloe's boarding pass, and she handed it over, looking completely confused.
"Lucifer, wait," Chloe called as he strode down the jetway. "What do you mean, we're not going to Las Vegas? That's where this plane is headed."
The man handling gate-checked bags nodded to Lucifer, and opened the side door. Lucifer grinned over his shoulder at Chloe. "Well, then it's a good thing we're missing this flight."
Lucifer's Porsche was at the bottom of the stairs. They followed the plane down the runway, then took a back service road out of the airport. In ten minutes, they were on the freeway heading northwest into the chilly hills, instead of northeast to warm Las Vegas.
"So, where are we going?" Chloe yelled over the noise of the wind whipping past her ears at 65 mph.
"Some place safe and secluded," Lucifer yelled back.
"Where?" Chloe shouted.
"Quite the control freak, aren't we, Detective?"
"What?" Chloe cried, looking offended.
"I didn't know wind-induced hearing loss set in so suddenly," Lucifer quipped. Chloe crossed her arms and glared at him, then reached out to turn on the radio to a Country station, just to annoy him. Lucifer spared her a glance, then sang with a perfect twang, "We were screamin' cause all the streets were empty. And you kissed me, and we were up all night-"
Chloe rolled her eyes and changed to a '80s station. Lucifer effortlessly switched to singing, "Maybe we make a deal. Maybe together we can get somewhere."
Chloe's eyes narrowed, and she switched to a Christian station. "Jesus... he loves me... he loves me..."
Lucifer finally reacted. "Not that pathetic drivel," he snapped. "I hear more than enough about my half-brother this time of year." He switched over to a classical station, and they sat in silence. At some point, Lucifer glanced over to find the Detective curled up against the doorframe. Good, she could use some sleep, he thought. The Detective works too hard.
Chloe woke up as the convertible's engine shut off. "Where are we?" she asked groggily, looking around at the giant redwoods surrounding the parking lot.
"Camp Pluto," Lucifer said, pointing to a wooden archway with the name and (former) planet carved on either side. "It's situated far enough from any town with streetlights so astronomy nerds can get their fill of star gazing."
Chloe stepped out of the car and surveyed the green undergrowth and towering rust-colored trees. "It's beautiful, Lucifer." He looked pleased with himself, and went to fetch the suitcases out of the trunk. "It's quiet." Chloe could hear the occasional hammering of a woodpecker, but the reverent silence of this place made her aware of the endless drone of traffic back home. "Remote." There were power lines stretching from the road up to several log cabins, but her cell phone showed no bars at all. "Lucifer, I don't have cell coverage. How am I going to check in with Trixie? What if Dan needs to warn us because the mob is on the way?"
Lucifer hefted a purple suitcase out of the trunk, and slung his suit bag over his shoulder. "Did you ever think it might be good for you to disconnect, hmmm?" Chloe crossed her arms and glared at him. "Fine, Detective. There's a landline in the office, and we can check the voicemail tape for messages from Dan twice a day."
"The voicemail tape?" Chloe asked, incredulous. "Please tell me this place has indoor plumbing."
"Yes, Detective, you'll have access to a toilet and a hot shower." Lucifer shook off the thought of water cascading down Chloe's body. "We're in the cabin on the hill. Jens said it has the best view."
Lucifer was downright chipper as he lugged the suitcase up a hiking trail and several wooden stair cases. Chloe was getting increasingly twitchy. "Lucifer, I don't like this. There's too much cover. Anyone could sneak up on us and we wouldn't see them until they were three feet away."
"We could burn down the undergrowth," Lucifer suggested with a straight face. "I do so love an inferno."
Chloe snorted, "Yeah, I'm sure the young trees would appreciate the additional sunlight."
Lucifer looked back at the Detective. "Since when does a city girl spout off forest facts? Have you been watching too much Yogi Bear with your spawn?"
"No, Trixie doesn't watch Yogi Bear." Chloe shook her head, a nostalgic expression on her face. "But Dan and I made sure to take Trixie hiking whenever we could. My Dad would always take me camping when I was younger, and I want Trixie to be able to appreciate nature too."
"My Dad was never one for family outings, and my excursions to Earth were generally cut short, so I can't say I've had the chance to really appreciate the great outdoors." Lucifer brushed up against a tree, and came away with an armful of sap. "Bloody hell," he cried, trying to wipe the sticky substance off and only succeeding in getting his hands covered in pitch.
Chloe suppressed a laugh at the sight of the prim man in a full dress suit surrounded by acres of forest and dirt. "City slicker," she teased, and passed him to take the lead up the trail.
Chloe insisted on securing the cabin, cautiously walking through the door with her gun drawn. Lucifer flung the door open behind her, and proceeded to toss the suitcases in the middle of the living room. "Let's see what Jens has provided for supplies," he called, striding through a doorway into what looked like the kitchen. Chloe sighed at Lucifer not taking anything seriously, and lowered her gun.
It was actually a cute little cabin, with two bathrooms and four bedrooms, each with one double bed. The main living room held a giant wooden dining table and a mismatched set of furniture. Chloe ran her hand over the back of a gold velvet chair and shook her head at the plaid couch. A giant stone fireplace loomed in the corner, but the room was made more cozy by the numerous shelves with an assortment of books, games, puzzles, and camping gear. Chloe stepped further into the dining room area to look out the glass doors. "Wow, Jens was right about the view."
Lucifer popped back in from the kitchen, and stood next to her to admire the redwood and pine valley. "Yes, I do think I made a good choice for a hideout, wouldn't you agree, Detective?"
Chloe elbowed him. "Maybe. I'll reserve judgment until I see the stars from the deck." Chloe gave him a side eye and semi-casually leaned against him. "Do you want to watch with me?"
I would like nothing better than to drown in the starlight reflected in your eyes, Lucifer thought, gazing down at Chloe's soft smile. But he had made a promise to Dr. Linda, and that sounded like it was likely to lead to a physically intimate situation. "Perhaps," he said, trying to sound non-committal. "We need to unpack and I need to look in the other cabins for additional cooking supplies." He turned to walk away to his room, ignoring the perplexed look on Chloe's face. "Jens left us with an absolutely dismal set of condiments and spices."
"What, no truffle oil?" Chloe called after him. She received a short laugh as he hauled his suit bag into a room on the right. Chloe picked up her suitcase and hauled it into the room down the hall from Lucifer.
"I hope Maze packed some pajamas," Chloe muttered as she threw her suitcase on the bed and unzipped it. Her jaw dropped. Apparently Maze had packed nightwear, if by nightwear she meant clubbing clothes and every piece of sexy lingerie Chloe owned.
"Where did she even find this?" Chloe exclaimed, pulling out an off-the-shoulder red dress. "Wait, was this from a high school dance?" The suitcase was full of blouses that were bought on sale and then found to be too low-cut for her male colleagues to take her seriously. Spaghetti strap tank tops bought on vacation, never to be worn again. Too thin white shirts. Lacy bras that had been part of her plan to seduce Dan into having more interest in her and then buried in the closet after they separated. "Oh, for fuck's sake!" Maze had even found the cosplay costume she had worn to one of her Mom's conventions. Chloe dumped the leather dress into a puddle on the floor.
"Well, you wanted to seduce Lucifer, so Maze gave you plenty of ammo." There was only one problem. It was 55 degrees outside, and she was going to look really odd on hiking trails in a dress.
She walked into Lucifer's room to find him neatly hanging up an army of suit jackets. "Hey, Lucifer, do you know if the camp has a lost and found?"
"Why Detective? Have you lost your cabin key already?"
"No, it's just the clothes that Maze picked out..." Lucifer looked intrigued and Chloe realized this was the perfect opportunity to flirt. "Well, they're fine for when you and I are alone..." Chloe sauntered up to him, and Lucifer gave her long legs a once-over. "...sitting by the fire." Chloe leaned towards him, looking at Lucifer from under her eyelashes, and ran a hand up his jacket. "They might make me a little cold though."
Lucifer was staring at Chloe's lips when the phrase "physical intimacy" ran through his head. Damn Dr. Linda to hell. He cleared his throat and took a step back from the Detective. "So Maze is an inept packer, hmm?"
Chloe blinked, startled at Lucifer backing away from her come-on, and slowly let her hand fall back to her side. "Um, yeah." She shook her head, and then snapped back into her usual brisk tone. "She didn't pack any warm clothes, so unless I'm right by the fire, I'm going to freeze."
Lucifer sighed as he watched Chloe's face transform from slightly hurt to glacial cop. "Right, well, if what Maze picked out isn't suitable, we can't exactly hail an Uber to the nearest mall. The closest town is an hour away, and we're more likely to find a farm supply store than a Macy's."
"Right, which is why I asked if there was a lost and found. Maybe I can borrow some sweatshirts."
Lucifer grinned wolfishly and gave Chloe a once over. "You're more than welcome to borrow my clothes." The vision flashed before his eyes, of Chloe wearing nothing except for his suit jacket beside the fire. Bad devil, stop that!
Chloe watched his seductive grin fade. Wait, is he flirting with me? Chloe wondered, confused. Didn't I just flirt with him and he pulled away? This is just some game to him. Whatever. "And risk ruining a suit that costs six months' salary? No thanks."
"Very well then, Detective." Lucifer straightened his jacket and gestured out the door. "The lost and found is probably located in the main office, which is back down the hill."
"It doesn't look like there's a lost and found in here," Chloe said, closing yet another box of papers. The office was full of boxes, but none of them had clothes in them.
"Detective, did you know that Al Capone spent some time here?" Lucifer called, holding a photo album.
"What?" Chloe said walking over.
"Yes, there's photographic evidence." Lucifer showed her a photo of a group of gangsters and singers, leaning against a bar on a stage, drinks in hand.
"No, Lucifer, they're obviously in costume. Flappers never wore dresses with fringes and feathered head bands. This was a play."
"Oh," Lucifer said, taking a closer look at the photos and dates. "Do you know, Detective, it looks like there were several plays over the years."
"Which means the summer camp probably has a wardrobe room." Chloe looked at him excitedly.
"Sound work, Detective!" Lucifer exclaimed, grinning. "We make quite a team, following the clues to the couture."
"Yeah. Yeah, we do," Chloe stated, giving him a soft smile. The world paused for a few heartbeats as they looked at each other.
Lucifer felt an odd emotion rise up within him, and instead of squashing it, he decided to try this 'emotional intimacy' concept and put it into words. "Detective..." Lucifer carefully put the photo album down and gathered his thoughts. "When you were on trial, you stated that I was the best partner you've ever had."
"I did say that. And I meant every word."
"You also said that you could 'count on me' and I..." Lucifer looked at Chloe, confused. "I don't know what I've done to deserve your trust, Detective." Chloe started to shake her head, but Lucifer held up a hand. "I've abandoned you at crime scenes when they were too boring. I've caused you no end of paperwork and headaches by tormenting your suspects. I have little knowledge of police procedure aside from what I've gleaned from working with you. Even after a year, I still don't know what a BOLO is."
Chloe smiled and shook her head. "No, Lucifer, you don't understand. You're insightful. You get me to look at situations in a new light. You understand people's motivations and desires." Chloe bit her lip, and Lucifer got an inkling what she was desiring, but her next words surprised him. "But you're still this mystery to me. I've been honest with you, but I still feel like there's things you're not telling me. Sometimes I can tell something's upsetting you, like when you tried to get yourself shot by that sniper, and you won't open up to me, and it kind of... hurts." Chloe shook her head and then looked at him, arms crossed.
Will I never stop hurting the people around me? Lucifer thought. Chloe's mention of his attempted suicide by sniper brought back memories of confronting Uriel to save Chloe from being killed. Of Azrael's blade singing gleefully in his hands as it sliced through his brother's flesh. Feeling it quiet as he stared, horrified, at his brother's blood covering his hands. Dr. Linda's words rang in his head, "Why is it that you've never shown Chloe your true face?"
Lucifer's jaw worked as he studied the notices on the corkboard. "Look, Detective, I... I don't always tell you things..." He took a breath and looked her in the eye. "...because I'm afraid that you'll think less of me."
Chloe put her hand on his shoulder. "Lucifer, why would you think that?"
"You're a paragon of honesty, Detective," he exclaimed, gesturing at her. "An unwavering upholder of Law and Order and Justice. And I-" I killed someone. I killed my brother to protect you. The words caught in his throat and he simply shook his head.
"No, Lucifer, I'm not perfect." Chloe put her other hand on his shoulder and gave them a squeeze to make him look at her. "I'm human too." Lucifer snorted, not wanting to correct her perception of his mortality. "I make mistakes. You just saw me get caught lying about being the first person on the scene of the murder of the man accused of killing my father. Please don't put me on a pedestal. I don't-I don't want to feel like you need to pretend around me."
Lucifer eyed the Detective with such a mistrustful gaze that Chloe's heart ached. Chloe let the silence stretch, aware of her hands still gripping his shoulders, just looking at him hopefully. Chloe finally felt him relax slightly. "Alright, we'll start small." Lucifer drew a breath, looking determined. "During our case with the stab-happy yoga teacher, I stole the blade from the crime scene."
Chloe's jaw dropped and she blinked. "You. Stole it. Why?"
"The blade was originally stolen from someone who was once very close to me." My sister, Azrael, the angel of death. "It was very important to them, so I stole it back, as a favor" to the humans who would have died under its terrible influence.
"That's why you were so worried about the blade and then you didn't care when it went missing." Several things clicked into place in Chloe's mind. "So you took evidence from a crime scene." Lucifer cringed and nodded. Chloe took a breath and tried to focus on the positive. "Ok. Thank you for being honest with me. It doesn't make what you did right, but I would rather know than have you hide things from me." Lucifer nodded solemnly and Chloe chewed on it some more. "Wait... you said you would start small. Stealing a murder weapon from a crime scene isn't exactly small."
Lucifer looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Oh, if you only knew all I've done. He aimed for a joke to lighten the mood. "Well, Detective, I could have started with the fact that I've been stealing Dan's pudding from the precinct refrigerator, but you caught me in the delicious act of devouring one last week."
Chloe tried to clamp down on an eye roll and failed. "Lucifer, this is serious."
"I know, Detective! Who will eat Dan's precious puddings while we're both gone from the station? They'll go bad!" Chloe shook her head, but she was smiling again. "Look, Detective, didn't you tell me our stab-happy yoga teacher took a plea bargain already? It's not like she got away scot free because the murder weapon was missing."
Chloe sighed and crossed her arms. "You're right, Lucifer. But this is a problem. I can't have you stealing things from crime scenes because you owe someone a favor."
"All right detective. You have my word I won't steal anything from an official crime scene."
"Dan's pudding is off limits too."
"Touche detective. Very well then." Chloe nodded, and Lucifer took a breath and smiled. "That went better than I expected."
Chloe smiled back at him. "See, Lucifer, you just need to trust me. Now come on, I still need to find some warmer clothes."
Lucifer let her lead the way up the hill to the main dining hall. Would you keep smiling, Detective, if I told you I was a murderer? How can you trust me if you don't believe I'm a monster who tortures people?
