A/N: If this looks familiar, it's because I posted it on my Naruto blog (mainly SS) sus-uke for SS Month Day 9! I just edited a few words here and there.

Also based on that first sentence I guess I have an affinity for the word trivial. I'll try to update Trivial Motion as soon as I'm done moving!


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On Opposite Sides

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Sarada has seen her parents fight before ("it's not fighting, only a discussion," her mother would say and her father would agree), but never once would she have imagined that they could become so passionate over something so trivial.

The family of three had been lounging in the kitchen. Sasuke and Sakura both stood at the counter, preparing the family's routine dinner, while Sarada sat at the table recounting the day's events.

"I don't know how," Sarada paused for a moment to find the right words, "but Boruto managed to make the farmer even angrier than before, and this was after he accidentally sprayed the wrong pesticide all over the crops!"

Sasuke snorted, but otherwise the two parents were silent while their daughter continued her story.

"So I'm thinking, well this mission is a complete failure, but I can't see how it can possibly get any worse." Sarada said.

"Oh no," Sakura intoned.

"Oh yes! Mitsuki, the poor soul, had thought that it would've been a good idea to ask the farmer a question to deflect the attention away from Boruto. Except, it only made the farmer explode at us. He kicked us and Konohamaru-sensei off his property!" She pushed her glasses up in a huff, as they began to droop down the slope of her nose. "I can't ever face Hokage-sama again, not with a mission failure!"

"Sarada, I can assure you the idiot has other things to worry about."

Sakura stopped chopping the vegetables she had in front of her before throwing her husband a glare, and walking over to face her daughter at the table. Putting her hands on the dark haired girl's shoulders, she looked into her daughter's eyes. "What your father means, is that while Lord Seventh is an incredibly powerful ninja now, he wasn't the most talented ninja at your age."

"That's giving him too much credit." Her father now faced the two.

The woman rolled her eyes and ignored her husband's comment. "I can't tell you how many d-rank missions we failed as a team, many of which were Naruto's fault."

"Really, Mama?" Sarada asked in disbelief.

"Oh yeah. Big time."

The family was silent for a moment, while Sakura processed the new information given to her about the Hokage.

"So what was the question Mitsuki asked?" The pink haired woman was curious about what had gotten the farmer so riled that it cost her daughter a successful mission.

"Hm?"

"What did Mitsuki ask the farmer?"

"Oh!" She had forgotten to mention it. "He asked if tomatoes were fruit or vegetables." She hid the grimace on her face, for she knew that her father enjoyed the little red balls of pure evil.

There was a pause in the Uchiha family. The knife Sasuke had been using to slice thin strips of salmon clattered on the wooden cutting board. "Well, that's easy," the father responded monotonously. "Tomatoes are obviously vegetables."

Her mother clicked her tongue, and replied to her husband. "That's where you're wrong. Tomatoes are classified as fruit."

"I think I would know if tomatoes were fruit, Sakura."

Standing besides the elder Uchiha female, Sarada watched as her mother crossed her arms haughtily, with a smirk upon her lips. "I suppose the great Sasuke Uchiha can't know everything."

"Sakura…"

"Yes, darling?"

"Fruit is sweet. Tomatoes are savory, acidic almost."

"So?" Sakura asked.

"I hate sweet things. I think I would know if I enjoyed eating it."

Her mother in return replied with what seemed to be the most sugary voice imaginable. "Well," she shrugged, "you enjoy eating me."

Sarada was horrified, and didn't even register the blush that resided upon her typically stoic father's face. "Ew! Ew! Mama! Do you have to say things like that when I'm in the room?"

Sakura had the decency to look a bit ashamed. "Sorry Sarada."

"I knew Papa and Mama were dirty." The girl shook her head in disappointment.

The man in the room cleared his throat. "As I was saying, there isn't a possible explanation as to why tomatoes would be in the same category as another fruit such as a banana."

Sakura Uchiha moved towards her husband, poking her index finger solidly into her husband's chest. "There are plenty of explanations, Sasuke-kun, you're just choosing to be ignorant.."

The man rolled his eyes, and gestured for his wife to continue.

"It's not about the taste, silly. It's about the way the fruit is developed." She emphasized her point by sprouting her hands together, in the form of a plant sprouting. "They come straight from the ovary of a flower, same as cucumbers and other types of squash. I wouldn't typically tie those together with other more commonly acknowledged fruit, but I can't change what it is. And what it is, is fruit!"

Sarada was amazed that her mother had put such such thought behind her argument, but it was clear that the same sentiment was lost on her father.

Both renowned shinobis simply stood in the kitchen, practically nose to nose, but on opposite sides of opinion. It was almost comical, for her mother stood on tip toe to seem more intimidating (and almost succeeding if it were not for the flour smeared upon her cheek), and her father, always strong and lean, clad in a frilly yellow apron.

Said man pinched the bridge of his nose with his sole hand. "Sakura, you're being stubborn-"

"I'm being stubborn? You need to accept science, Sasuke-kun!"

Their daughter, still seated at the dining table briefly pondered if she had enough time to run up to her room to grab her phone to record the squabble between her parents before deciding that the risk of missing too much was greater. Boruto would just have to believe her when she would tell him about what his idolized sensei did in his spare time.

"Well then, science is wrong." Her father retorted.

Sarada almost burst out laughing at the wild eyed look that her mother took on. The pink haired woman began to sputter, "I- You- What?!"

"You heard me." The man smirked. "Your precious science is wrong."

"You can't argue against a classification!"

The salmon on the cutting board was starting to look tempting. Sarada wondered how much longer they were going to argue before they went back to cooking their dinner, she was hungry, she thought glumly as she patted her empty stomach. She hadn't eaten all day after losing her appetite from the failed mission. The girl cut off the quarrel between the two adults to ask a question. "I get that you both have passionate opinions on this, but can you do this after dinner?"

It was funny how quickly the couple seemed to gain a sense of self-awareness. Immediately, her mother and father seemed to practically deflate.

Sakura had the decency to look sheepish, and apologized. "I'm sorry sweetie, I guess we got a little carried away huh?"

Sarada shrugged, but gave her mother a warm smile in response. She also was able to see the red that tinged the tips of her father's ears, and burst into giggles. "Papa, can we go out to get ice cream after dinner?"

She knew that normally her father would decline, but figured it was worth the shot. Especially since he seemed to be feeling a little guilty.

The grunt her father gave her was enough confirmation.