Chapter 2: Nothing Less Than Love

Castiel moved around his room, fingers caressing all of the surfaces.

Dead had left, of course he had. It would've been a nice, perfect, romantic world if they'd been able to stay content and snuggled in the same room. Same college. Same city. Technically Dean should've been graduating that year but he'd decided work at the same time. The four year track for your bachelors only really worked if you took a full course load every semester. At least they were still in the same state and the drive would cripple neither of them or their still tentative relationship.

With a sigh and a shaky smile he settled himself onto the bed. They hadn't had the chance to completely unpack any of things. The room was empty and a mess. The only items up were the presents he'd received for Christmas that first winter of knowing them, and the decorations Mary had forced him to take with. The largest item, leaning against the wall, was a painting from Dean's room he'd grown fond of that the older boy hadn't wanted. A leftover from Mary's decorating before Dean had been able to choose what to put into his room.

He tried not to focus on the mess too much, it would make him anxious. Dean would be back tomorrow and the room would become a little more colorful. Castiel reached over for the stack of papers he'd left on his desk. Information for the counseling center and a name circled in red on the back. He had his own therapist of course, but she'd felt like it would be important for Castiel to have someone to talk to on campus if she wasn't available. He'd been to nervous to say no. In his head he knew it was a smart idea, she couldn't be available to him all the time. There were other patients to take care of. Patients who needed her more. It was the thought of having to re-divulge everything he'd already shared with her that made his skin run cold. It had been hard enough the first time around and he hadn't even shared everything with her yet. He took comfort in knowing the visits would be merely a suggestion, not a requirement.

A loud slam echoed across the hallway. Castiel jumped, banging his head on the top of the bed. (They'd bunked the two to give him more room.) Loud laughter followed the noise and Cas' eyes flew to the door that separated the joint bathroom he shared with the room next to him. Loud, very male, voices echoed across and Castiel put an open palm to his chest. His heart beat strongly against his hand. He frowned and curled his fingers around the fabric of his shirt. Castiel clenched it tightly, leaving creases as he chastised himself. It would be the start of four years, four years of therapy, doctors visits, and medication. One bang shouldn't have thrown him off so badly. Besides, unless he'd been mad Lucifer had always been gentle.

When his laptop beeped at him, followed by a shrill ringing, Castiel nearly slid to the floor in relief. He yanked one of the chairs the dorms provided out and settled himself in it. A small flashing icon was jumping up and down at the bottom of his dashboard. A few clicks later Sam's face came into view.

"Sam," Castiel said, shoulders sagging a little as he relaxed.

'Hey Cas. All settled in?'

Castiel nodded and moved a little out of the way. He turned his laptop so that Sam could get a small eyeful of the room.

'So I guess not all the way in.'

"Dean had an evening class and work tomorrow morning. He couldn't stay. He'll be back tomorrow. How's Stanford?"

Sam's face split into a gigantic grin. Castiel watched as he resettled himself in the chair. 'Really good. I'm so excited- I still can't believe I'm here-' Sam stopped talking for a moment and frowned.

Even before he could continue, Castiel jumped in, "That's great, Sam. You'd better take a lot of pictures. I assume you'll be using all of your vacation time to visit us?"

When they'd sat in Sam's room at the Winchester's house, browsing through pamphlets, he'd noticed Sam hovering again and again over a Stanford brochure. Castiel had no desire to leave that far, he'd had his heart set on places closer to Dean and to his brother, Uriel, but far enough not to have to spend any more time in the same city that had shaved away so much from him. In the end it was only with Castiel's encouragement that Sam had applied; he'd looked pained when he'd gotten the acceptance letter and still felt guilty over it.

'Of course! I don't think I could stay away even if I wanted to. Pretty sure everyone would kill me or come kidnap me.'

"As good of a driver as Dean is, I'm not sure I'd like to see him speed to California in the Impala either."

'One of these days speed limits will mean something to him.'

"We live in hope." There was shuffling in the back of the stream coming from Sam's room. Muffled conversation in the background as Sam's head disappeared from the view of the camera. When he came back he had a remorseful look on his face. "Go."

'If you're still up later, I'll hit you up. I'll text you.'

"Have fun," Castiel said as he hit the button to end their video call. He knew if he didn't do it Sam would linger for forever, worried about leaving.

He glanced at the clock, it wasn't quite late enough for him to be heading to bed yet. He thought of Sam and Dean and promptly realized that he hadn't e-mailed his own brother at all about being settled in.

Uriel and Dean still weren't the best of friends, he doubted they ever would be and not speaking to or seeing each other didn't help, but Castiel and his relationship as brother's had grown. It wasn't perfect, and every few months they would attend a therapy session together, but it was still there.

Castiel opened his e-mail to find both an e-mail from his aunt, and more or less still legal Guardian, and his brother. He opened Anna's e-mail first. Something in his chest unknotted a little as he read through the e-mail. It was short, sent early in the morning, with a few too many smiling and heart emoticons peppered through the e-mail. If he hadn't known better she'd been a bigger nervous wreck about him leaving for college than he'd been. And he'd had an anxiety attack the last night he'd packed.

That little something in his chest that had loosened as he'd read his aunt's e-mail wrapped itself straight back up.

He'd opened his brother's e-mail. There was the expected excitement, threats to kick anyone's ass that bothered with him, a warning to 'Winchester' to treat him well, but it was the extra he hadn't been expecting. It was about the rest of their family. The family had had left him and Uriel stranded in Lucifer's house never to check up on them after his mother had died.

Lucifer had been very prolific in the community, and in ways that Castiel hadn't known in his field of work.

When Lucifer had been convicted, a time that Castiel only vaguely remembered in detail (he knew at least that there'd been Dean's hand, warm in his own), it had sent ripples through everyone that had known him. Even as they'd dragged Castiel and Uriel through the long trial process there had been violent opposition. Such an upstanding family man could never do that to his own children. They'd never have been able to be friends with someone like that. They would've never done business with a man like that. He was such a nice boy growing up. He's a good man. You're just dragging his name in the mud! You've ruined his career!

We would've know.

When the conviction and jail sentence had been handed down all that Castiel could recall was the deafening silence in the court room that followed.

The rest of the family had been quick to re-connect with them after that. Or attempted to. Uriel had made it vehemently known that he wasn't very interested in speaking to anyone else in their family. It wasn't as if they were interested in checking up on them for their well-being. Ignoring the natural animosity for the parts of the family that had left them alone, Anna had warned them about the type of people they were related to. She'd been polite about it but she'd also made sure they understood why she owned a private business, completely separated from the main Novak 'clan'.

He'd never even known they'd been so important and now they wanted to be everywhere in their lives.

Castiel never paid much attention to them and in the past years hadn't met them or directly heard from them. Anna did a very good job fielding questions from the rest of the family. Repeatedly they'd asked her where he was planning on attending school, even offering to pay for it. Anna had said 'no thank you' and they'd worked hard to make sure Castiel got a scholarship. (He'd refused to let her put a dime in. They'd finally compromised at school supplies.) Uriel, however, made sure it was his business to know most of the whereabouts of the rest of the family. He stayed far enough away to not be involved but Castiel was starting to get worried it would get him in trouble.

Uriel hadn't particularly cared and told him that he wasn't going to 'fuck it up' again.

Someone in their family was running for a senator's seat and another would be starting a book tour with campuses listed as potential tour spots.

'I'll let you know if there's a more concrete list. Seems okay for now. You stay the hell away and keep an eye out on campus news.'

'I will, thank you.'

Despite trying to tell himself he was fine, and just because his father had been scum didn't mean that the rest of the family would be as bad, just the idea of them made him feel weak. Spit gathered in his mouth and he quickly rummaged through the remaining boxes, ripping them open with a pair of scissors he'd found, until he found his bedding.

He was just happy that Dean hadn't made fun of him for it.

The comforter he pulled out was Dean's old one. It no longer smelled anything like him but it was enough to know how many nights Dean had let him sleep with him, safely on top of the blankets, dozing on a lazy Sunday.

Not caring that it was probably not an acceptably late enough time for a college student to go to sleep on their last free night, he crawled into his bed. Castiel shifted around, the anxiety crawling like an army of ants over his bed, forgetting that he had no other bedding unpacked and that he probably should take his evening medication just in case he fell asleep for the night. Briefly, he lifted his head to turn and yank his cellphone off of the desk within reaching distance. Castiel clutched at it, knowing all he had to do was push a button and there Dean would be, no matter what. Still, there was no way that he would be out of class yet.

So instead of worrying his boyfriend, Castiel fluffed out the comforter, wrapping his arms and legs tightly around it, and buried his face into the soft fabric.

Dean would be there tomorrow, Uriel would make sure that he knew where the rest of the family was, and Anna would never let any personal information about him slip.

He'd be fine for one night.

Castiel breathed in deep, imagining Dean next to him. They still had plenty to work on to make their relationship full, happy, and healthy; but it was good. It helped that Dean was talking to a few people as well. From what Castiel could see he'd never forgive himself for the... outburst, as Castiel liked to call it, when Sam had been injured. It was something they'd eventually have to talk about, but outside of the guilt Dean spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to help Castiel work with the rest of his trauma. It had been a long few years but things were starting to feel a little more stable. Like the ground underneath his feet wouldn't crack open at any minute and swallow him hole.

With a nudge, Castiel kicked the comforter a little further over him, cocooning himself in it. He imagined Dean's warm hands, spread out over his body, scared to touch him. He thought about having to scoot back to initiate a tighter hold and how Dean would sigh in relief, warm breath brushing against the nape of Catiel's neck.

He was pulled out of his small fantasy by a beeping. Castiel tried to figure out the source before realizing it was the phone he was clutching in his hand. His eyes felt heavy and blurry. He was much closer to falling asleep than he'd thought. Maybe the day had taken a bigger toll out of him than expected. Castiel slid his phone open.

DEAN:

'class is boring as hell. wish i coulda stayed. JIC I cn't call until ur asleep rem. med. & we put blankets & shit in box#4'

Castiel smiled, curling his lips in and nuzzling his head down. He stared at the text, feeling suddenly too content and tired to move. He let his hand drop, curling his fingers tight around the phone, and closed his eyes.

A/N: Another short one I know but hell the first chapter was supposed to be like, three-thousands pages anyway. It'll pick up from here once I get the base out and my feet back in the water for this story and start to really plan. Right now I'm just writing from the intro level and trying to get it to start juicing itself and I'm stopping wherever the muse says it's time to stop.

I'll probably start doing dividers between parts to make the chapters longer. It's weird only writing a few pages of work when I've been writing 20-30 page things for Alibi. I still do not have a beta. K already has her work cut out for her with Alibi. (Which, 8 pages already written, now I'm stuck on the after smut part. Also, it's semi-finals/finals week for Olympic Hockey so I'll be cheering and rooting for Finland so that's been kicking my writing speed in the butt.) This chapter published in honor of us defeating Russia in the quarterfinals.

Also; for those of you who are here from the original and were there, anything you want to see happen or covered in the sequel? Of course I've got my own goal points but if there was anything I was missing feel free to give feedback. And remember, updates can be found at goodquestionharlie for my tumblr account.