Chapter 2: Chamber of Sex

This is just a joke people, DON'T TAKE IT TOO SERIOUSLY.


One day at Privet Drive Vernon and Petunia were sexing Harry while Dudders watched with his new video camera. They were all high as pulled his fat dick out of Harry's ass and finished off the rest of the ice cream in the fridge then got Dudders' brand new bong out of the secret hiding spot A.K.A. Harry's cupboard, they hid their stash there so if the police ever came Harry would get arrested just like they wanted!

Suddenly a big hairy giant busted through their door and raped Dudley.

"Its time to go back to Hogtits you dumb fuck!" he said to Harry.

"Bye motherfuckers!" Harry said to his stoned foster family, as he ran out the door with Pubicwig up his ass and the trunk in Hagrid's.

As they left the house Hagrid threw him in the motorcycle and drove away with Harry's balls caught in the door the whole way to Diagon Dickway. When they arrived there Ron showed Harry his new Dildo he got for his birthday, this one wasn't a rotted hand-me-down! It was a Nimbus 2000-and-fuck-me, the newest model. Harry had to steal more money out of his college fund to get one! Once Harry met up with Ron, Hagrid left, but not before having an three-way with his two favorite students. Ron took Harry back to the alley way where they would need wheelchairs and the rest of his family was getting high as a fuck.

"HARRY!" Ron's mother said when they arrived in the dark alley.

"We were about to start without you two shits!" Arthur Weasley exclaimed.

They gave Harry the bong first.

"Careful now Harry." said Mrs. Weasley.

"Why do you like Harry better than me!" Ron said as he slit his wrists with Percy's dildo (yes it was that sharp).

"Go hang yourself already you fuck" said Ginny as she braided her pubes.

Ginny was becoming quite the young whore her father thought with pride he saw her snort coke with a hollowed out dildo of Percy's. Percy was coming along nicely too he thought as he watched his son beat his hoes with a leather whip.

"The best pimp of his age!" said their mom with pride.

Just then they were late for the train, so Molly shoved the group up her vag and ran as fast as she could to the station. It was a good thing she had eight kids so she could carry her family around. When they arrived they all fell on the floor and she pulled their shit-stained suitcases out of her ass. The train left so they had to take the car as they pulled away Molly heard several children die under her wheels.

"Music to my ear!" Molly said.

"Don't you mean ears?" said Fred and George at the same time.

"No, I mean ear, I lost the other one when I used it as my third hole in the sixties. Good times, good times!"

Fred and George stopped jacking each other off and got in the car, stepping over the severed heads of Muggle children.

First they lost Arthur when he opened the door and fell out of the car, but it turns out it wasn't Arthur, it was Mr. Paul in disguise! That explains why he was being such a dumbass for the past five minutes. His mom Britney Spears later got thrown in the trunk and shot in the head. Finally they got to Hogtits where they ran over Snape as they pulled up to the gates.

"ALWAYS!" screamed Snape, his last words before Hagrid shanked him.

Authors note: Shanked means stabbed to death then raped

End of book two, I don't know if I'm gonna finish it or not.