Bella sighed in relief as she lay in her tub, the bubbles almost engulfing her body. Her curls were pinned in a messy bun on top of her head, a few tendrils coming loose. She bent her head back and stretched feeling the knots in her shoulders dissolve. She had craved a hot shower for years, to feel the bubbles against her soft skin and smell the sweet aroma of strawberries.
After an hour or so she got out the now cold water and wrapped a towel around herself. Going out the bathroom she smelled the mouth watering scent of roasted chicken and pie. It was her favorite, and she never got tired of eating it. She looked around her house and sighed. She had bought this house for Martha when Tim and Abra were alive, but Martha now lived with her daughter who was with child. So Martha, being the kind woman she was, gave Bella back everything knowing that her old house held too much pain. Her house still remained empty, and the property still hers but she didn't step a foot there in seven years.
Going through her closet she pulled on black tights and a big t- shirt. There was no need to impress anyone. Putting on her grey Uggs and slipping on her old battered up jacket, she went downstairs. Martha had set up a table outside so that they both could enjoy the nice breeze and terrific view of the mountains.
The house stood in the forest, and Bella like it that way. She was isolated here and no one could bother or pity her. She knew what they said behind her back, knew that even though seven years had passed they still talked about it. Some called her crazy, others said she did the right thing but she knew that no matter what she would have done nothing would have changed. Abra and Tim would never come back to her. The pain would never go away.
She thanked Martha for the food, her smile all but forced.
Martha saw the pain in Bella's eyes, had experienced the same kind before, losing a child and husband in a dreadful car crash some years ago. Sighing she went to get her coat from the wooden rack She could still remember the bright smile on Tim's face as he brought Abra home from the hospital. She was such a beautiful baby with her fathers blue eyes and mother curling brown hair. A dimple winked on each of her rosy cheeks. When she had died, Martha remembered, Bella was cationic. She didn't want to eat, speak, or even walk. She only would sleep, and sometimes cry. The pain was too much for her. And Martha hated the man who had caused her all of her sufferings.
Going back outside and giving Bella a small sad smile she said,"Good night Bella",and kissed the her head, only to not get a response. Sighing she grabbed her things and left the house in silence. Bella looked at her walls. They were so bear, not a picture that would hurt her in any way. All of that was left in the old house. She couldn't bear to look at their faces anymore than she could bear to look at hers anymore. Not feeling hungry anymore Bella threw away the remaining of her food and went to the living room.
She settled herself on the red couch and propped her feet on the arm. She used to prop her feet on Tim's lap and Abra would lay on her stomach. And later, when abra was asleep, they would both tuck the baby away and kiss her goodnight. Clutching her stomach tightly she sobbed. Anyone could see she was unhappy, and miserable. At times she just wished to die. She knew the notion sounded stupid, but what was life worth living if you couldn't spend it with the ones you loved. She had been hurt so many time, by the Cullens, by Jake, and then when that man killed her family.
Funny she didn't know his name. She didn't know the name of the man who had killed her family and of who she had killed.
Sometimes she wondered how his family felt about her. She hated him with all her heart, so didn't they hate her too. She had killed their family, she had taken away a life, someone they cherished. She hated herself for that. She hated herself for killing someone's child, father, or sibling. She didn't have to, but she did. Even if he killed her loved ones she didn't have to kill him. She knew this.
Shaking her head, she closed her eyes and let her brain rest for a while. It was better for her to just leave the past and look on to the future. But she couldn't. Before she even knew it she was asleep.
Bella woke up to the sun shining upon her face. Her neck was stiff and her joints aching from sleeping in the wrong position. She rubbed her eyes and let out an unlady like yawn. She went into her room and threw on some clothes, too tired to really care if she looked good or not. She grabbed her keys, on the way out of the house, and locked the door. She always remembered to lock the top and bottom, the check if all the windows were closed. She could no longer feel safe...anywhere. She always felt as if someone was watching her from the shadows.
Bella got into her Blue Mustang and sped off towards town. She used to have a black Lincoln, but it was Tim's and he loved it to death. Driving it would only remind her of him and bring the pain. As she passed the tall trees and the forest she wondered how her life would be if Tim and Abra would not have died. Her baby would have been seven almost eight and Tim would be twenty six and looking handsome as ever. They would probably have more kids by now... maybe even the boy she had always wanted. She shook her thoughts away chastening herself for thinking such foolish things. They were gone and no matter how much she dreamed, nothing would go back to being the same.
As she pulled up into the driveway of the diner, she felt the many stares on her face. She saw Jessica Stanley Newton and her annoying kids just three cars away from her. They were about nine now and still as bratty as ever. Abra, she knew, would never have turn out like them. Jessica smiled and waved, almost friendly but not quite. Bella just nodded her greeting.
When she went inside, everything seemed to quiet down and everyone seemed to be looking in her direction. Such nosy people they were but Bella didn't care to speak her thoughts aloud. Some smiled at her, others avoided her eyes but only one dared talk to her. And that was Lauren Mallory or should we say Lauren Taylor. Her doctor of a husband stood behind her, looking nervously towards his wife. He must have known what a big mouth she was.
"Well if it isn't the killer bitch", she spat, "how was jail. Hope you suffered.". Everyone gasped like some soap opera and Bella chuckled. Turning around she met the plastic face of Lauren and smiled sweetly. As she took a step towards the bitch, the girl just took a step back. "If you're going to say something, than I sedgiest you know the consequences", Bella snarled. Bringing her hand back and then bringing it forward Bella broke the fake blonds nose.
Before she could do anything else a cold hand stopped her. She knew that touch all to well. The touch was suppose to comfort her, to sooth her. Little did the person know it riled her up. So they were back. She not only had to deal with her grief but she had to deal with this man, "Hello Carlisle... it's been a while", turning around she smiled cooly at the handsome man. All traces of anger or hurt were off her face. Number one rule is Bella Swans book: "Never show the enemy your weaknesses".
