Chapter two, peoples:) Just soes you knows, the italics are memories and thoughts and the like. Thanks for the people who reviewed!

A-Team I do not own...Serenity, yes.

Serenity flinched again at the wild screams of the patient whose room was adjacent to her. It seemed like every night he woke up, tortured by some terrible reoccurring dream. It took hours to console him completely, but tonight it seemed to never stop. After awhile, the woman couldn't handle it anymore. She stood up and popped her head out of the door. Nurse Bailey was just exiting his room, wearing a pale look. "Excuse me Miss Bailey."

The nurse barely gave her a glance. "I'm busy, miss."

"I know, but I was wondering if I could take a walk outside." Serenity put in quickly.

"It's past curfew." Bailey reminded her.

Serenity paled. "I know, but I don't know how much more of the yelling I can take." The nurse regarded her for a moment before nodding towards her.

"All right, but don't stay out too long, it's cold tonight."

Without skipping a beat, Serenity bolted towards the yard, not even bothering to change out of her baggy pajama pants and tattered T-Shirt. When she finally made it to her favorite tree, she collapsed onto the ground. Her palms were clammy and her stomach churned violently. She had never heard a man scream like that before. She slowly breathed in the cold night air, feeling it centered her slightly.

"What's wrong, little lady?" Serenity's sharp grey orbs snapped to her friend's brown ones.

"Oh, Murdock, you startled me." She shook her head and rubbed her shivering arms. The Captain knew the difference from cold shivers and fear shivers, and even though the night was as cold and crisp as the rat-tat of machine gun fire, he knew it wasn't the temperature that was getting to Serenity.

"Well, as much as Billy and I are sorry, that still ain't an answer, sweetheart." The mention of Billy hadn't even got a smirk out of Serenity, which made the pilot even more worried.

"Oh, well, I just wanted some fresh air, you know?" She attempted a smile.

Murdock plopped down onto the grassy patch next to her. "Now, honey, I saw you runnin' out here like you was bein' chased by a wild antelope monkey."

Serenity was still as white as a sheet, and though she knew she would be smiling at his words at another time, she was too shaken to even really register them currently. "Well, I guess I can't fool you, huh?" She smirked shakily.

"No siree ma'am, I'm the only one who can fool me."

Serenity sighed. "Well, I couldn't sleep. You know the guy who bunks in the room next to me?"

Murdock winced. "Clayton Vince. Poor little feller."

She drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her too-skinny arms around them. Her slightly green face contorted into a nightmarish grimace, like she was looking into the face of the grim reaper. "I've never heard a man scream so awful in my life." He delicate frame shuddered so violently that for a moment the pilot thought the young lady was having a seizure. She was shaking like a leaf. "It's simply h-horrible..." She seemed to be really shaken by this. The sheer terror and pain in those screams still sounded so close by. Her eyes fluttered open and closed as she lifted her trembling chin to the black sky. "I send a prayer up for that man every night, but I feel like it isn't ever going to do any good."

That wasn't a statement Murdock had expected. For some reason, he hadn't pegged the quiet, dark, secluded girl to be religious. Then again, he figured her personality wasn't all under control at the moment. "Sometimes, Renny, you just need faith to carry on." He sounded too much like Captain Murdock when he said those words. Serenity glanced up at him with a little worry, and a little sadness.

"Oh, I suppose it isn't anything particularly new to you..." She murmured delicately.

He shook his head slowly, his thoughts pulling him back to a place he didn't want to be. "No ma'am, it ain't."

Serenity suddenly bristled. "Damn that war and the people who started it!" She looked just as surprised as Murdock was at her sudden outburst. "I-um, apologize for my language..." She bit her lip. "It just doesn't seem right, does it?"

"Life, uh, rarely is right, sweet cakes." Murmured Murdock.

She seemed to think about this for a moment, before whispering softly. "Was it beautiful?"

Murdock gave her a look. "Pardon me?"

"Was it beautiful?" she asked again. "Besides the fighting, was it beautiful? Vietnam."

Now it was his turn to be silent. After a while, he looked at her with terribly dark eyes. "You know, I didn't really have the heart to notice."

Serenity gulped. "I apologize. That wasn't appropriate, was it? I'm sorry." She placed her chin on her knees and stared of into the distance. Why did I even ask? She thought.

"I suppose it woulda been, Renny, if there weren't so much hate in that soil." The Captain's voice came to her in a soft, haunted drawl that made Serenity think he was looking into the past. She silently cursed herself.

"I suppose the world would be beautiful too, if it wasn't for us."

Murdock glanced at the shaken young woman curled up next to him. He frowned, not much liking the cynical side of her. He had learned gradually that her cynical nature was usually a bi-product of the voices she fought back.

"Serenity, the whole world would be beautiful if people stopped lookin' at the dark and focused on the good parts." He slung an arm around her shoulder. "Now I know that look, sweetheart, but I'm tellin' you to have a little hope." She glanced at the oddly lucid pilot curiously.

"Hope, in this place?" She shuddered. As much as the meds helped her, the white washed walls never lost their menace.

Murdock leaned in closer, and Serenity saw the seriousness, and a little bit of desperation in his eyes. "Someone has to hope, Renny. Someone has to keep sendin' those prayers to the big guy upstairs, because most of us just don't have it in us to try anymore." From the look on his face, Serenity knew he counted himself among that number.

She smiled and nodded. "Roger that Captain." She tried to push all of the swarming dark away. "Where were you anyway? I hear from the nurses that you disappear every once an awhile, but where to?"

The man grinned his lopsided grin, making Serenity's heart skip a beat. "Well, I ain't gonna talk till you're on your way inside, you look positively chilled." He helped her up and they started walking back to her room. As Murdock started his tirade about Billy and flying Elephants, Serenity knew it wasn't true, but smiled anyway. The Captain knew she didn't buy it, but the truth wouldn't do, and he was grateful she played along.

All the while, Serenity listened, and put in things where she ought to, and laughed when she needed to, and put a serious mask on her face when his words called for it. The smile on her face was genuine, though. Even Murdock, so skilled in doing so, couldn't hide the hurt in his eyes, and Serenity promised herself solemnly that she would add a little prayer for him too.

What she didn't realize, was the way Murdock scanned her face and saw her strife, and promised himself he would send a prayer of his own upstairs for his friend, even though he hadn't done anything like that since Vietnam.


The shell of Serenity sobbed in the corner of her room, completely broken and terribly alone. Murdock had gone off, and on top of that, this...She hugged herself tighter and shivered, even though she was currently smothered in blankets.

In all her time here, she had never refused medication. Today was a different story. She had screamed at the nurse and smacked the medication out of her hand. They might have put her to sleep had she not then shrunk back in the corner, apologizing abundantly and sobbing terribly. She only lashed out if they got near, and she got more distressed each time they tried.

A nurse, named Leslie, was fond of Serenity. She knew why this was happening, and knew they wouldn't really be able to help her. She hated what they were planning. If only they could get across to the woman before they had to do this...

Just then, Leslie spotted Murdock, no doubt coming back from another escapade. She ran over to him. "Mr. Murdock, Mr. Murdock! Please I need your help!" The worried nurse cried. She had seen the calming effect the two had on each other, and thought this just might work.

The confused Captain stopped in his tracks. "My help? Lady, you must be the crazy one." Leslie was not deterred.

"It's Miss Wilds, sir. She wont let us near her and I'm afraid of what we might have to do if we can't calm her down. I thought maybe you could talk to her-"

The pilot was now all business. "Move aside, I'm on my way." He marched quickly to her room, long legged strides causing the nurse to run after him.

When they reached the door, Leslie stopped. "I'll be right here." He nodded, then carefully walked in.

Serenity was curled up in a corner, wrapped in a protective layer of wool, and sobbing hysterically. It was enough to jerk the man's heartstrings rather violently. "Renny? Renny, It's me, Mudock, remember?" She didn't respond. He slowly walked towards her, but she showed no signs she knew he was there. He crouched down right in front of her. "Renny-?" He reached out a hand and laid it on her shoulder gently.

Instantly, she clamped a hand on his wrist and screamed bloody murder, shoving it away, and swatting at him with her skinny arms. "NO! I won't take your medicine. GET AWAY!" The Vet was surprised for a moment, before regaining himself. He couldn't grab her flailing wrists, lest she thought he was trying to force give her medicine, which would make her panic even more. In the end, he winced as her arms hit him and pulled her into a strong embrace.

"Renny, it's me, sunshine. No one's gonna give you anymore meds right now, see? I wont let em." From the folds of his shirt a quiet voice squeaked.

"Murdock?" The weakness in her voice was terrible to witness.

"That's right, sweetheart." For a few minutes, she sobbed into his chest, both relieved and hurting. Finally she pulled away, her eyes red rimmed and her skin even paler than usual.

"M Sorry, Murdock." She apologized with slurred words.

He rubbed her arms softly, trying to quell her shivering. "I just don't understand, sweetcakes, you've never been upset about takin' meds before."

An almighty shudder jerked her. After a moment of painful silence, she finally choked the words out. "They did something to me, Murdock. I'll never...I'll never...be me again..."

The Captain froze. He had heard plenty about the terrible side effects of the drugs. Had they done something to her? "What happened?"

She trembled for a moment before weakly scooting forward into his arms. Her body was loose and weak, like what was bothering her had stolen all of her energy, all of her will to live. She laid there for a long time, listening to her friend's breathing and heartbeat. The voices on the edge of her mind retreated somewhat from the protection Murdock offered. "I wasn't feeling right." She murmured at last. "They did an exam, they told me...they told me..." Her chest tightened up and her heartbeat raced. "I heard about the side effects, but I thought they would be better than the voices." In a tiny whispering voice, she whimpered out the next line. "I was wrong." Murdock tensed. He had never seen her so low. He knew he needed to wait for her to speak. Finally Serenity pulled away from him and looked into his deep chocolate eyes. She was embarrassed, ashamed, and guilty. She didn't want to say it, but knew she had to. She knew she needed to face him while she said it. It would help her face it herself. "They told me I can't ever have kids, HM. They said the meds...they made it so...so..." She couldn't finish. The tears overwhelmed her eyes and spilled outwards. She looked up to the sky, lip trembling and voice cracking. "God, HM, I always wanted to have kids so bad." That revelation shook Murdock to the core as he watched his sweet Serenity tremble. She always was so gentle and calm. She would have been the perfect mother, he mused. He cupped her face with his hands, making her look at him. Her eyes seemed like lifeless gray orbs, unseeing, almost.

"Oh, darlin'. I'm sorry. I can't even imagine what you must me feeling. I just..." For once in a long while, HM Murdock had no idea what to say. He had felt lost before, and look what it did to him. He figured he needed to help her but he didn't know how. He stroked her soft cheek with his thumb, although she didn't seem to feel it. He sighed. An idea had hit him, but he wasn't fond of it. At all. The sight of Serenity trembling like that however, forced him forwards. He yanked off his coat and started undoing the buttons on his shirt.

"What are you doing?" Serenity mumbled. She wasn't really startled. He had his Napolean shirt on underneath his buttonup, but she was nevertheless confused. She'd never seen him with less than his longsleeve button up on. When he had loosened all of the buttons, he threw it off and shyly moved his arm towards her. For a moment she was downright lost, but then she spotted the ghostly white lines wrapping around his wrists, and the small pockmarks and thin webbing along his skin. She gasped lightly. She knew the soft marks had once been an angry red, and she could only imagine the pain...Why had he shown her, of all people, those marks? "HM..." She choked out. Tentatively, she reached out a hand and traced the lines on his arm, wincing at the small moan he choked out. Angry tears leaked out of her eyes. "How could anyone do something like this? To my HM of all people..." She nearly gaged, imagining someone doing these things to her jolly friend. Murdock frowned. He hadn't meant to upset her more, he just wanted her to know she wasn't alone...

"You and I and a whole bunch of other people know what it means to be unmade, Renny. I know that you can't talk about it to someone who's never felt that way, at least, not without regret, and...if you need to talk about it...or somethin'...or..." He was stopped by the soft kiss she laid on his cheek.

"Then I know just who to talk to." She reached for his button up and handed it to him, hands no longer trembling. "Thank you." Her eyes meant more than her words; they said everything she didn't know how to.

He studied her for a moment and saw...he didn't know what it was, actually, but it wasn't pity, and he was grateful for that. He shrugged his shirt on and snatched up his jacket. Serenity put a hand on his arm. "I don't know if I want to talk more about it just yet, but...I will later." She smiled. "Now go get some sleep, HM, you look like a you need it. You can tell me about your adventure later." He smiled his lopsided smile and nodded.

"Yes ma'am." He stood up and started out on shaky legs.

"Murdock?" She called out.

"Yep." He turned around to look at her.

She paused for a moment before gathering her resolve. "Tell em I'll take the meds now."

Murdock smiled softly at Serenity. She was so strong and she never gave up. She made him feel sane, and she did it without trying. She was stronger then most men he had seen on the battlefield. In a huskier voice than he had intended to use, he replied, with his hand snapped up in a salute. "Yes, Ma'am."

Well, that scene was hard to finish...I'm just gonna be framing the main things that happen at the VA, but I might go into further detail later. If anyone has suggestions or anything, I would be happy to hear them. I'm just a little baby writer who would love any tips:) Well then, till I see you again, ta!