Words between asterisk *written like this* are actions. Words in italics are thoughts of the speaker. A series of asterisks such as ****** are dividers between situations.
Contains spoilers for books 1 through 4.
Disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury.
This one is more a study on Dumbledore and Snape. We know that they are both cunning. I thought it would be fun to pit one against the other, to see how their mind works.
Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated, praise is always welcome, but flames are ignored so don't even bother.
Headmaster vs. Potions Master:
How Dumbledore got Snape to watch over Lupin
Snape: WHY?! Why am I making this stupid potion for stupid Lupin?! Lupin who's so stupid that I have to remind him to take the potion. Lupin, who's so stupid that even after reminding him, I have to check up on him and upon checking and realizing that he didn't take it, I have to play his stupid house elf and bring it to him! WHY?! Ah yes, Dumbledore…cruel, sadistic, manipulative, more evil than Voldemort could ever hope to achieve…Albus Dumbledore.
*********flashback to summer before start of classes******
Dumbledore: Ah there you are Severus, care to make a slight wager to make this year a bit more…interesting?
Snape: Interesting? I'm sure you mean, tolerable. This is rare, Albus. The last time you participated in a bet was 2 years ago when we had a group lottery over whether or not the Whomping Willow would survive Fluffy's-
Dumbledore: Yes, yes. All in the name of science and now we know that the Whomping Willow can tolerate enormous quantities of nitrogen.
Snape: Yes, all in the name of ….science. And I do believe I was the sole winner in that lottery *smirk*.
Dumbledore: My, my… little Sevie's gloating...trying to gloat in front of your old Headmaster eh? Well, no one here has had the extensive experience that you've had with that tree.
Snape: *glares at Dumbledore, mumbling* sadistic bastard.
Dumbledore: *Raising an eyebrow* What was that Severus?
Snape: *clears his throat* I was just wondering what kind of wager you had in mind oh beloved Headmaster.
Dumbledore: Ah yes. Let's see. I'll bet you 4 lemon drops that Remus will turn into a werewolf at least once this school year.
Snape: What kind of a bet is that?! That's the kind of bet that I would come up with! Of course, none of the professors would be dumb enough to bet against a given…what is the old man up to? Do I look stupid? No way! I'll not be on the other end of this!
Dumbledore: Now to set the bait! Don't like lemon drops? Alright then, how about I double your salary if you win?
Snape: IT'S NOT THE LEMON DROPS!!! Headmaster, I do not place bets on impossible odds! I'm a Slytherin, not a Gryffindork!
Dumbledore: Gryffindork? Oh I'll get you for that one…but later. Right now I gotta raise the ante. The odds are not impossible, just improbable-
Snape: *crosses his arms* No.
Dumbledore: It didn't work when he was a student and it's not gonna work now. How about I throw in a trip to Hawaii for next summer?
Snape: Hmmm, Hawaii would be nice. I could get a tan, try surfing, hula dances…well I could make a Wolf's Bane potion for Lupin…WHAT AM I THINKING?! I KNOW HE'S UP TO SOMETHING AND I WILL NOT FALL FOR IT!!! But hula dances, sunsets on the warm beaches…ABSOLUTELY NOT! But hula dan-NO! I regret to decline your offer, Albus *satisfied smirk*. And why is this bet so important to you? *raising an eyebrow*
Dumbledore: Ha, trying to out think me Slytherin? Time to reel him in! Important? Not at all. I just thought you would enjoy the opportunity of a challenge. But I guess I was wrong. You are cunning and ambitious…I guess you just don't possess enough cunning and ambition to win this bet…even though you are the head of Slytherin house.
Snape: DAMN HIM for exploiting my Slytherin pride! Gryffindor my ass, he must've been a Slytherin! No way out of it now…fine, then I'll drag him down with me. Double my annual salary tax-free, a 2 month all-expense paid trip to Hawaii this summer, no Valentine's Day at Hogwarts next February, the Weasley twins expelled, and I get to call Madame Hooch, Hoochie-mama and you've got a bet.
Dumbledore: I can't expel Fred and George but I can replace their double potions with Ancient Ruins.
Snape: Deal. *turns to leave*
Dumbledore: Now for that Gryffindork bit…Oh and Severus, in the event you lose this wager, you'll be accompanying Sibyll to the Yule Ball next Christmas.
Snape: *shudders*
Dumbledore: *smirks, popping a lemon drop into his mouth* Who's the man?
