5/8/o9 I am such a terrible Luxord, it makes my skin crawl. My description abilities could use work too. Oh well. Another slow, cruddy installment by me. My thanks to BeyondBirthday187 for adding this to your Alert list.

Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts is rightfully Square Enix and Disney's property.

I just enjoy destroying every shred of childhood memory it provides with my fanfiction.

Chapter Start

"What o I owe such a pleasant visit?" What he meant was "what the fuck do you want?" Dragging Luxord inside and shutting the bolted steel door, the boy wiping his hands once he let go of his visitor. "Please speak." Don't waste my time.

"Nice seeing you too, Zexion."

"Axel sent you. I'll ask again: what do you want?" Now he was being straight forward, sitting at one of his desks with crossed legs. Hollow aquamarine eyes watched him warily, almost angrily. "I know I am normally patient, but I can smell him on you, and it's making me sick. Take a shower if you plan to stay long." The blonde sighed, shrugging off his shirt and pants, Zexion tossing him a robe as replacement. Taking the discarded clothing, Luxord quickly yelled after him,

"Don't burn them this time; I walked here." A laugh echoed from the hall his 'friend' disappeared in, his fears temporarily calmed when a washing machine sounded instead of flames. When the rich and moody fiend returned, he beckoned for Luxord to sit at the small, circular wood table in the kitchen while he made his way around the cupboards for tea. "Thank you. So, I have heard gossip about a na–,"

"Do you want mango raspberry, or are you feeling up to some Earl Grey?" Slightly vexed from being interrupted, the blonde shrugged to indicate he didn't care which he had, making a light joke by adding, "just hold the poison." His host smirked and set up the tea kettle, heading over to the cabinets again to pull out a box of snickerdoodles. Chewing one thoughtfully, he set the cookies in front of Luxord, finally seeming sincere in hospitality. "The Naked Man, or The Streaker. It amuses me how YouTube, LiveJournal and DeviantART are talking more about him than the News, considering how dangerous he is. Actually, I hear he recently has a tributary Myspace page. Would you like the address?" Luxord was still on the subject of some nude colonist being dangerous, shaking his head in reply for internet information,

"How do you figure?"

"No one seems to realize he's not just leaping around the city," Zexion said softly, ignoring the question, "but the world. Other countries have reports of him, though a detail or two changes about his appearance. Hold your tongue." Munching on another cookie, the bluehead attended to serving his guest tea, dropping in a dab of honey before serving himself and gesturing for Luxod to follow him again. "This is the first of four videos where he displays violence. The quality is rather poor, but it's quite popular still; has 532, 046 views." With a sip of his tea and consecutive flicks of the wrist, the young man had an internet video playing in only seconds. "Hey asshole, pay attention!" It started with honking and a lousy focus, losing the ex - gambler's attention almost immediately. The blonde wasn't usually the type to question the other's intellect, but he had a small doubt about how many people watched this until he saw it was the exact number the boy predicted. About to bring this up, his heart just about caught in his throat as a ground - shaking sound that registered to Luxord as an exploding water pipe boomed, blue eyes snapping to the computer screen in time to see a Hummer smashed from the grill to the back seat windows, all folds of beaten fiber glass and aluminum scattered from one small focus point. The video finished then.

"What the bloody Hell was that?!" His shock and angry disgust was clear though he remained careful not to drop the expensive cup in his hand. The genius was too busy searching a different website, however, to care. Leaning away from the screen, he tilted his head towards it, an expectant and patient look on his face as he sipped his tea in silent contentment. It was a better quality photo than the trembling cell phone recoding of presumably a man's back from the center of the neck to below, well, sculpted derriere. The person must have had a very nice camera to capture such wondrous detail, because in the picture there were several other people and the focus point was noticeably far off. "He's huge. . .!" A majority of the crowd around the object of his curiosity barely reached beneath his shoulder blades though a few could face the middle. Zexion rolled his eyes, pinching the man's side.

"Wonderful observation, honestly, but that's not why I brought this up β€” could you quit staring!?" Luxord chuckled nervously, pale cheeks dusting pink. "Thank you. Please put your attention to him again, but the details of his skin." Raising embarrassed eyes to the Deviation again, he did as told. "He's. . . pure muscle. . .?" He received no answer, meaning he was missing the point. It was so irritating when Zexion made a game out of this; he would provide references and information, but create a puzzle out of most of it. "He. . . has a mild tan?" His bitter and enigmatic friend quietly drank his tea, dull silver - blue gaze resting on whatever he was waiting for the blonde to figure out. Letting out a frustrated groan, he scanned over the photograph again, close to throwing in the towel by now. "Could you just β€”," he started, silenced by particular markings on the Streaker's back. He hadn't put much thought into tattoos being strange, but upon careful observation, he noticed that the angle The Naked Man stood in revealed the black and purple ink protruding from his shoulder blades.

"Odd, isn't it? Almost no one mentions the wings; they're all too occupied with his body. They're real, in case you were wondering." Maneuvering the mouse, Zexion reopened the YouTube tab and played it again. This time Luxord watched, wobbly focus ascending quickly over the Streaker, man's dignity briefly viewable for a split second. There wasn't time to worry about such impropriety when this gossip legend left hooked the car's grid and crushed the entire front half effortlessly after that tremendous hissing sound was heard again. The bluehead paused to the part where the man prepared his punch, lips visible at the left end fo the screen while Luxord freaked.

"He's a monster!"

"But what kind?" The sincere curiosity and bristling excitement in that one inquiry petrified the guest, "He isn't human, Luxord, that is for sure. No amount of steroids will give someone that power, nor a body such as his. Seen here, his skin pigmentation is knitted with a kind of indigo, but in the photograph it isn't. The Streaker is better understanding what it means to appear human. . ." He shut the computer off, "Heed my advice and be wary of strays. I am anticipating his arrival soon." Clearly disturbed by an ominous, and almost plausible foretelling, the blonde headed down a hall and snatched his clothes out of the washer machine, wringing them out the best he could and hastily putting them on. "Luxord –?"

"I'll air - dry. Thanks for the tea, Zexion." And with that, he made his very clumsy and quick escape from the friend he now deemed looney.

* * *

Where is everything he once knew? Why is this place so foul and overpopulated by such ungrateful faux - beasts? They were small but great in number, and though they appeared as harmless as a faerie they carried remarkable and freakish weaponry.

He was so confused, having a difficult time staying awake after centuries of sleep, exposed to so many weird wonders in such a small amount of time. The growling yellow monster with one of those bratty humans in its belly, shouting at him was his first unpleasant experience here, aside from just having not an idea of what was going on.

Treading through the darker streets of this unholy place, indigo orbs rose to the sound of unsteady, heavy breathing and clapping, falling on a running human with short golden hair. He made no movement, muscles tensing to prepare for attack when the person slowed down, the obnoxious clacking sound decreasing volume as he did. "Who knew he was the suspicious type. . . ?" the human said, oblivious to the one who watched him.