"I am not obnoxious," I said matter-o-factly.

"Yes you are, you can't go five minutes without insulting me or complaining about something."

"Not every five minutes." He rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, I'm not even gonna bother arguing." he shrugged.

"Yeah, because you can't find a good comeback." He stayed silent and ignored me.

"Why are there people in my living room?" said a very tired Spencer coming out from his room.

"Long story," I said.

"How is you wanted ham and my mom tried to give me a tick bath a long story?"

"Because it wastes thirty seconds of my life, and now you just wasted another thirty seconds talking about it."

"Guys," said a voice in the background.

"Yeah well you would have wasted a lot less time if you just explained and not started arguing."

"Guys," the voice repeated a little louder.

"I wasn't the one who started arguing, y-

"You guys!!" yelled Carly at the top of her lungs.

"What?!?" we both asked simultaneously and then exchanged glares.

"Shut up!" she yelled.

"Fine," I said.

"Alright," he sighed.

"Now go to bed or get out." She said firmly.

"Since when are you so strict?"

"Since now, I'm tired of you guys always fighting about every little thing, Spencer and I are going on vacation tomorrow and-

"Wait, you're going on vacation?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah, I told you like a week ago. You weren't even listening to, were you?!"

"I was listening, I just forgot, I'm tired you know." The truth was I wasn't listening, I usually just smile and nod when pretending to listen since most of the time she's talking about some kind of test or something and how I need to study or I'll fail.

"Okay," she said a little suspicious.

"So where were you going again?" I asked. Wow, that was a stupid thing to say.

"Sam!" she yelled.

"What?!"

"You weren't listening! Half of what I said was about where I was going!"

"Well sorry, I just had a lot on my mind that day."

"Yeah, like, let me guess, ham?" commented Freddie.

"Watch it Benson."

"Will you two stop it! Sam, I'm going to Hawaii tomorrow. Now can we all just sleep?!"

"Fine," we both sighed.

the next morning

When I woke up, at first I had no idea where I was since this obviously isn't my room, then I remembered I fell asleep on Carly's couch which is breaking my back. No wonder no one else wanted to sleep here. I looked around to see Carly frantically looking for something.

"Sam! You're awake! Help me find my camera!"

"Wait what time are you leaving?" It was 7 a.m. right now. I'm surprised I woke up.

"7:30," she said still rushing to find her camera.

"7:30!? Why didn't you wake me up earlier?!"

"Because every time I tried to wake you up you said "go away, I'm sleeping" and tried to hit me with a pillow."

"Oh, well, where's the dork?"

"Helping Spencer with something. Now help me find the camera!"

"Why can't you just borrow one?"

"Good point, I'll go ask Freddie!"

"Okay then." Well now that everyone was out of the room and I have nothing to do, why not have a fat cake?

I started eating when it hit me, where the heck am I supposed to stay? I can't stay at my house unless I want to end up in the hospital, and Carly won't let me stay here because last time she let me stay here alone, let's just say she yelled a lot when she came back, and she was only gone for about two hours.

"Carly?" I yelled without thinking.

"Yeah?" she said coming back in the room.

"Can I stay here while you're gone?" What am I saying?

"Do you remember at all what happened last time?"

"Yeah but I what if I run out of ham and fat cakes at home?" That has to be the stupidest excuse I ever said.

"Then go and buy some."

"But what if all the stores run out?" Correction; that has to be the stupidest excuse I ever said.

"Well get some from someone else."

"I can't though."

"Why not?"

"You know people these days; they don't share their ham and fat cakes anymore."

"Just bring the ones we have to your house before we're gone then."

"Yeah but-

"Sam, the answer is no," she said cutting me off.

"Fine," I said giving up. What am I supposed to do now?

"We have to get going soon unless we want to miss the plane!" yelled Spencer.

"We're right here you know, you don't have to yell," I commented.

"Sorry, I'm just so exited! I mean we're going to Hawaii!"

"How did you even get tickets there? They're like impossible to get," I asked.

"Well the lady said that a family had just cancelled because they got sued for something and couldn't afford it anymore and since you guys are famous for iCarly she gave us a discount!"

"I love being famous," Carly laughed.

"Great, now let's GO!" yelled Spencer and then headed into the lobby.

"Well bye guys, don't murder each other while I'm gone," said Carly before she and Spencer left. Where do I go now?