Disclaimer: The characters and world belong to Ciro Nieli and Nickelodeon.
Chapter 1.2
Set my body free
The silver tigers in the moon light running
And the wind in the trees
Singing do you believe?
We Must Be Killers – Mikky Ekko
Well, shit.
With some effort, Karai averts her gaze and plasters the best nonchalant look she can muster on her face. "I have no idea what you're talking about." So much for being in the clear. Her heart races and her fingers itch to grab her phone, to warn Leo that Tiger Claw knows. But it would give her away, it would just be too suspicious.
"The rock," Tiger Claw steps closer until he is towering over her. "That you threw at my face when that despicable rat was about to perish by my hands."
Her face flushes in anger and embarrassment. She is being talked down to by a giant cat. As if she were a child.
She cranes her head back so she can look at him. "Why do I need to explain myself to you?" There's no point in denying. He knows and she comes off bad by lying about it. Not that the whole ordeal was sketchy as it is...
His paws clench into fists the size of her head. Avoiding the urge to cower, Karai stands and while it minimises the space between them, her head is jutted out in her own self-pride.
"You need to explain yourself, or I will go straight to Shredder about this." He whispers menacingly, "and where would that leave you?"
Dead, possibly.
Her options are limited.
"Shredder is lying to me," she forces out, her teeth clenched tightly as she admits the harsh truth. "He has been lying to me my entire life, and Splinter knows the truth." No longer being able to stare into Tiger Claw's one eye, she casts her gaze to the crescent moon. "He can't die, just not yet, alright? Are you happy?"
She does not register his reaction, hell, she's afraid of his reaction to the news. Her mind conjures up a twisted visual of herself being dragged back into the church by Tiger Claw and thrown at her father's feet as she is forced to cough up the truth. What happens next is a blur, clouded by what the truth really is. Would just having doubts cost her, her life? Or would Shredder tell her everything that she has been wishing to know since old enough to understand what her mother's death really meant. She was alone.
"No," he answers gruffly and turns away, giving Karai space to breathe again. "Your doubts may just cost me my job, and my life if I let you look into this..." He trails off in thought, truly thinking about his next course of action.
Karai's jaw clenches. She wants to beg, to plead to give her just a little bit more time to figure it out but... she's just too stubborn to let herself seem so weak.
"When we cross the turtles' path," he begins and Karai listens intently as he turns to face her, his eye set in stone, daring her to protest. "You will help me destroy them unless you want your father to find out what you've done."
Her face falls at the information, eyes focusing on her feet. Destroy them. Something only a few months ago, she would have welcomed. Hell, she would have given anything to dig their graves for them. Now it puts a sickening pit into her stomach.
"Hey, guys," April says from the beanbag, her knees up to her chest as she watches Donnie and Mikey play video games. "Want some pizza?"
Mikey flinches at the offer but softly nods, "yeah, sure."
Leonardo sighs from his spot in the Den, resting against a cushion. "It was just a dream, Mikey." His eyes flick to his T-Phone that is held tightly in his hand for what seems like the hundredth time since he returned home and got the warning message about Tiger Claw. Still nothing new from Karai. He couldn't decide if that were a good or bad thing.
"It wasn't." Mikey says forcefully before heaving his own sigh, knowing his brothers would not believe him and turning his attention back to the game.
April gets up and shoots Leo a warning look, don't push him. She really was like their older sister, but in retrospective, she would be the same age as Leo so he gives her the same look in return. She quirks a smile before disappearing behind the barriers that lead to the subway.
A small sound of protest comes from Donatello as he is beaten by Mikey, yet again. "Wait, shouldn't someone go with her?"
"She can handle herself, Donnie." Raph says as he rips the controller from Donnie's grasp. "Move it, my turn."
"Yeah, she can handle herself, but does she necessarily have to?"
"You're being protective, Don." Leo points out, his free hand jerking towards where April had just left. "You know she hates that. We've all been told off for it at some point, just trust her. If she needs us, she'll call." With that thought, Leo glances down at the T-Phone and his stomach forms a pit. She will call if she needs him.
Raphael narrows his eyes at him. "What's the deal with you and that phone? You've had it in your hand all night."
"None of your business." Leo shrugs it off, his attention on the game but Raphael hits pause – ignores Mikey's protest of 'hey!' - and stands up.
"You are acting weird and weirder than usual, what the hell happened when we home?"
No getting out of this one, Leo internally sighs and lifts himself from the seat. He slips his T-Phone into his belt. "I talked to Karai and-"
All at once, his brothers fix their attention onto him and Leo swallows before he continues, "I gave her my number in case she needs us."
Never has Leonardo felt so awkward around his brothers before. He cannot even stand Raphael's heavy gaze and he looks towards the barriers, eager to escape. But soon enough, each of his brothers begin to talk at once -
"We can't trust her, Leo! What were you thinking?"
"She ain't gonna believe us, how stupid do you think she is?"
"Does she want to come home?"
The final question is said gently and Leo's eyes soften at his youngest brother. "Mikey, she... she doesn't know what to believe. But I am helping her, which is a good thing-"
"Leo," Raphael snaps, and his large hands grab onto Leonardo's shoulders. "She was raised by Shredder. He manipulated her all these years, what makes you think he will roll over and fess up? Face it, bro. She's going to believe him out of all of us."
Leo's eyes tighten and the air gets unbelievably thicker. He doesn't believe that. Karai is not Shredder's daughter, she is Splinters and Tang-Shens. If her parentage alone has anything to say about her – it's not that she's gullible enough to feed into Shredder's lies without having her own doubts. Which she does. She said as much.
"Then why did she warn us of Tiger Claw's return?" Leonardo demands rhetorically as he shrugs Raphael's hands off of him. He had not yet informed his brothers on the return of their newest enemy, but now just seemed like the perfect time – to see that shock register on Raphael's face made it worth the wait.
To drive it home, Leo waves his T-Phone in the air, "yeah, she messaged and informed me to make sure none of you leave the lair and get yourselves killed."
Raphael looks utterly stupefied.
April rounds the corner at that moment, two boxes of pizzas in her arms. Her face falls as she takes in the scene around her. For a moment, she looks as if she is about to drop the boxes but she settles them carefully down on the pinball machine.
"What is going on?" She asks warily, moving to stand between himself and Raphael.
"Ask him," Raphael growls, "he has gone behind our back-"
"Behind your back?" Leo echoes incredulously. "Is everything one-sided to you, Raph? Why can't you look at this from her point of view? She did not ask to be raised by the Shredder, she didn't ask to be torn away from her true father and have her mother perish in a fire-"
"Leo!" April whispers in horror.
Then he notices Master Splinter in the doorway, he must have heard them arguing from the Dojo.
Feeling suddenly uneasy about the situation, Leo turns his back with every intent of going to his room and not letting anyone in. He would use this time to escape and go topside, but Karai's warning was clear. So instead, he slams the door to his room harshly and sits down heavily on the bed.
His brother – the source for most of his problems – never could quite see from other people's perspective, his downfall. Leonardo's downfall would have to be the faith he has in those who don't quite deserve it. But Karai does, she really does.
Just as he decides to call it a night, his T-Phone lights up. He stares at Karai's picture for a few seconds, attempting to decipher if this is a trick.
He answers hastily, "Karai?"
"Leo," she breathes into the receiver. She sounds out of breath; afraid.
"What happened?" He is on his feet, prepared to round his brothers up to help her-
"He knows, Leo," she says his name again almost like a mantra, "he knows."
Leo doesn't need further explanation. His brows pull together. "Do you want to meet up?"
"No!" Karai exclaims. She takes a deep breath before continuing, "stay in the sewers, you're all safe there."
Leonardo feels his chest constrict with each passing word. If she doesn't need help, why did she call? He had not planned to let his brothers or even himself leave-
"He is blackmailing me, Leo. Tiger Claw knows something is up and I confessed. I told him and if we see you... I have no choice but to fight you."
He opens his mouth, to assure her it's not that bad, they always fought and why should this time be any different? But he is interrupted once more with shattering information.
"He wants me to help destroy you. All of you."
Leonardo's lack of response haunts Karai as sits on her bed. After Tiger Claw's dismissal, she ran straight back to the penthouse and made a beeline for her room where she knew it would be safe to call Leo.
When did she become so dependant on him? On anyone, but herself? It sickens her, really. She had been doing just fine a few months ago. Until she saw Splinter for herself, then it felt like her entire world was opening new possibilities and awful truths. What would be worse? Pretending it was all fine and staying with her uncaring father, or making a life changing decision that will leave her questioning who she really is as a person?
When did the sake of who she is depend on who her father was?
"Say something," Karai implores in a whisper and brings her knee up to her chest. "Please."
"Are you safe?" He sounds determined, like he has a plan and Karai's anxiety instantly deflates.
"Yes, I am."
She can almost hear him nodding, "good, then." He responds and she hears some muffled movement, he must have sat down. "Keep in contact, alright?"
"I'll keep you updated." Karai promises, her usual self piecing back together. With that, she hangs up and shoves the phone underneath her pillows. She almost frowns at her childish behaviour, as if that will stop anyone finding her phone, but she feels at ease so she pushes herself up from the bed to examine herself in the mirror.
Frazzled, she decides upon her reflection. Her hair is fine, no loose, straying tendrils and her make up has not smudged, but her eyes are just a little too wide to be considered normal.
She stifles a humourless laugh. When has her life ever been considered normal? Karai rattles off a list in her head, never been to public school. Never had friends, and when she did it was a mutant who just happened to be her enemy at the same time. Was trained in martial arts since she was old enough to walk. Was raised to kill the man who was responsible for her mothers death.
If only she know who that really was.
The next morning, Karai wakes up earlier than usual. At the break of dawn, she is situated on a stool in the kitchen and she stares down at the only picture of her mother that she has. It was time. It was time to talk to her father.
He never comes home when she does, possibly to avoid seeing her. He spent most of his time in Japan at his business offices and would only attend her training sessions to give her tips. Before she was shipped to New York on his orders, Shredder had promised to show her the Death Dragon kata.
But then there were complications.
Karai rubs her thumb absently over the hand covering her mother's shoulder. It no longer seemed like a coincidence that the fire burned only a portion of this photo, keeping the identity of her father hidden.
With a quick glance at the clock above the bar, Karai swivels around in her seat and leans her back against the tabletop. He would be home shortly, to sleep, she didn't know. Maybe to grab a few things, drop something off, but she knew he came here every day – when she was asleep.
The door opens and Karai regains control of her breathing. She hadn't noticed how nervous she was getting.
But there he is. Her father steps in, removing his helmet in the process and locks eyes with her. He does not linger his gaze as he moves to the coffee table in long strides, many documents sit on top.
"What is it, Karai?" He asks without even looking at her. He flips open the cover of one of the few documents and scans it briefly before moving to the next one.
"I wanted to ask you something," she finds her voice after a few beats of silence. "It's important... about – it's about Mom."
Her mother had always been a sore subject. When Karai was really young and her father would actually spend time with her, whether it was to teach her Japanese and English or to read, something any normal father would do with their child – just a little less emotionally attached – Karai would often ask about why she did not have a mother like the kids in movies.
He would brush her off. But when she was old enough to understand what death meant, he relayed the harsh truth to her. She was only seven.
From such a young age, Karai had blamed Hamato Yoshi for – not only her mother's death – but the reason why her father was so detached towards her. Whether he resented Karai for surviving and not the love of his life or because the idea of a happy family had been effectively shattered, she never really cared. She only knew that Hamato was the blame for everything that ruined her family.
Shredder would not even tell his seven year old daughter how he and Tang-Shen met. It brought back too many painful memories, he would say.
Karai had to build her mother a personality. She had to build the love her mother had for her when she were still alive because her father never decided to reassure the child that yes, her mother loved her so much.
Then the rat, the very person she blamed for everything, told her how much like her mother she was. She had snapped at him, told him to shut up and never speak of her mother again when her own father never dared mention her himself.
So fierce and yet, so scared.
That is the epitome of how she felt in this very moment, about to confront the main who raised her.
"I don't have time, I have a very important meeting in-"
Her chuckle cuts him off and she looks at the ground, nonplussed. "You never have time."
The silence that follows is so deafening that she hears him close the document and look at her. She does not raise her eyes to meet his, afraid to see his scarred face loom back at her.
All the courage she had mustered seemed to break before her very eyes as she slips the photograph into her sweatpants and stand from the stool, eyes focused on the hallway that led to her bedroom.
"Forget it."
"Karai," his voice stops her.
When she faces him, Karai fully expects to see the usual agitation set in her father's eyes but it's not there.
"What do you want to know?"
Slightly caught off guard, Karai stares back at her father for a few moments, wondering when the act will die. He has a meeting, he won't miss it. But he still stands there, waiting patiently.
"What was she like?" Her voice comes out small, as if she is seven years old again.
His eyes catch hers and for a split second, she sees it. She sees fear in his eyes, but fear from what, she couldn't tell.
"She was..." he trails off, his tone matching hers and he swallows, "she was much like you. Strong, beautiful, never let her opinion go unspoken."
Tears spring to her eyes but she holds them back. In all her years, he has never opened up like this. Never called her beautiful, even indirectly as he did just now. And to hear from her father that yes, she was like her mother was a relief. Perhaps her mother was proud of her.
"We met shortly after I left the army with Hamato," his voice takes on an edge but he continues to speak, "I met her first. I introduced her to Hamato and..."
She waits patiently. If she persists, he may stop altogether.
His eyes fly back to hers and he shuts down, the walls back up and his face is stone cold.
"I have to go, get some sleep before sunrise."
With that, he walks briskly from the room and fastens his helmet back over his scarred face.
Knowing there is no way she could ever fall asleep, she moves to the lounges and sits heavily down on one, the photograph back in her hands.
For once, Karai truly feels like she knows her mother.
At the break of dawn, Leonardo wakes up from soft knocking on his door. He turns over in his bed to face the offending noise.
"Come in," he says and pushes himself up as he rubs the sleep from his eyes. "Sensei?"
Splinter offers him a soft smile before entering his bedroom. "My son, how are you feeling this morning?"
Memories of the night before rush back and Leo suppresses the urge to grunt and go back to sleep.
"Wonderful."
Splinter's eyes soften as he sits on the edge of the bed, his hand resting on Leo's shin. "Please, do not bring the burden of dealing with Karai upon yourself."
Heaving a sigh, Leonardo moves from beneath his Sensei's grasp and swings his leg over to be sitting on the edge as well. If it were that easy, Leo would not be feeling so down in the dumps. He might be in the Dojo, training until he formed blisters and was satisfied with the progress he had made. But it was impossible when he continued to wake up during the night, his hand reaching for his T-Phone to see if Karai had contacted him.
"Leonardo, please. This is not worth you and your brothers fighting."
Leo chuckles and slaps a hand to the back of his neck, rubbing away the pain from his muscles. Must have slept on it wrong. "Raph thinks I should just give up, but I can't. It's not that I am taking on your burden, Master Splinter. It's that..." he shakes his head softly, "I betrayed her."
"I made so many wrong decisions because of Raph when I could have made the right one and maybe... maybe Karai would not be in this situation. Maybe she would be with us, right now."
"Leonardo..." Splinter rests a hand on his shell, "do you really believe that if Karai chooses to accept the truth, that she will live with us?"
Leo looks up, confused, "don't you?"
Splinter holds his gaze, his brows knitting as if in pain, "I would wish that to be true. But it is not my place to hold her here, especially against her will."
The T-Phone lights up, vibrating in the bed sheets for only a second before Leo snatches it up, his eyes running over the message.
Had a talk with Shredder. I don't know what to believe any more.
Leonardo looks at Splinter who reads the message and giving away no indication to how he feels.
"Don't push her, my son," Splinter finally says as he makes his way to the door. "It is her decision, and her decision alone."
When Splinter leaves, Leonardo feels lost and angry. Lost because he wants to help Karai, he wants to make her believe the truth. Angry because how can a father just ignore what is happening around him? He knows where Karai is, yet he refuses to go and get her. To bring her to the Lair and explain himself.
Leo. Reply. I need to know if you are safe.
He quickly replies, sorry, I'm here. Do you want to meet up tonight?
Not safe. Talk later, I have training.
Leonardo sighs heavily and reclines on his bed, his eyes suddenly heavy.
When will she stop being the last thing he thinks about before falling asleep?
Hi!
I want to finish part one of his fic before the episode comes out so expect quickish updates from here on out.
Thank you for the responses I have gotten and for simply reading this story, it means a lot and I appreciate all of it :)
This is really just a filler chapter for what is about to happen... so enjoy the calm for now! The storm is coming.
