sorry for the late update and how short this chapter is ... hope you enjoy though!
The whole house was still asleep. After all, it wasn't that late, probably something like 7-ish. Though he was tired from his jogging, Ian was still quite active so he used his energy to prepare breakfast for his siblings. Afterwards, he started tidying the living room which was a mess, besides, he had to keep himself busy, to keep his mind off of things he didn't want to remember. However, his strategy led him to the opposite result as he noticed the broken glass from the window that had been left on the floor. He remembered Sammi who was (fortunately) unable to aim properly with a fucking gun. He then remembered who she was after but also why that latter person had made an attempt on Sammi. Ah. There it was. There was the guilt he had tried to bury deep down. There it was rushing, breaking everything, all his defences, drowning him like a tsunami. Everything was his fault, it was all him. Sammi should've killed him. After all, she had already ratted him out to the army, might as well finish him.
He had heard her being arrested, her yelling and swearing at the cops was so loud the entire neighbourhood had probably heard it too. That was all he knew about the aftermaths of the event.
He heard a step on the stairs that made him startle. He almost reached out for the baseball bat before realising it was only Debbie. She looked at him, then at the breakfast already fully made, then back at him. "You're already up? You should really take a shower, you stink." After that, she just sat at the table and started eating. Ian gazed at her for a few seconds. He could barely recognise her, something had changed while he was away a couple months ago. Because ever since, she was no longer the nice, smart and understanding sibling he had known. Or maybe it was just his perception that had changed. He could remember her calling him crazy at the army base and how it had hurt him. Truth be told, it still did. He knew he was sick, but family was supposed to be forever, family was supposed to stand by you no matter what and not make you feel awful about yourself …
Ian didn't reply to his sister, he just nodded and started to climb the stairs. He waited a couple seconds outside of the bathroom until he heard his brother flush the toilet. He then walked in as Liam was washing his hands. The little boy turned his head to see his brother, frowning, suddenly smelling the unpleasant odour that was coming from the redhead. He even plugged his nose while walking out with a smile, playfully avoiding any physical contact with his brother by remaining a couple feet away from him. Once Liam out, Ian grinned. His little brother was by far the only person who was able to make him feel anything right now; it was an enjoyable, warming feeling in his stomach he wanted to hold on to. He listened to Liam's footsteps rushing down the stairs. He then proceeded to take his clothes off, while taking a peek at his reflection in the mirror. He had large dark rings under his eyes and he looked exhausted, like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. He stepped into the shower and turned on the faucet to ice cold water. His entire body tensed up as he rubbed his eyes. The cold against his skin was chasing the numbness away. He was filled with energy.
He spent nearly fifteen minutes there (thank god someone – Lip and his deus ex machine – had paid the water bill), letting the water awake his senses. He could have gone for another run afterwards, but he wasn't up for it. Ian stepped out of the showing singing and wanting to dance like there was no tomorrow. His hips, wrapped in a towel, were swinging, the melody in his mind bewitching his body. His thoughts wandered back in time and he remembered his former job at the Fairy Tale. He was actually missing the place and how every client was gazing at him, wanting to touch every single part of his skin. He enjoyed feeling desired, therefore powerful. He always knew he could ask for anything as long as he gave back even just a little. The clients adored him, needed him.
He looked at his reflection in the mirror and sighed. Even if he wanted to, he doubted he would ever be hired in Boystown again. He was out of shape and his overall appearance was a mess. His hair was so long, too long, longer than it had ever been; he needed to get it cut. He froze a second, experiencing a sort of flashback: the last person who had cut his hair had been Svetlana. She used to trust him, to rely on him, to teach him Russian, to laugh with him … But that time was over now and it probably never happen again.
Ian grabbed clean clothes and got dressed. He heard Debbie yell from afar: "Going to school!" He rushed to the top of the stairs to wish her a good day but the sound of the door shutting cut him. His eyes crossed Liam's."Guess we're gonna spend the day together buddy!" Liam shrugged, used to being left alone, he motioned towards the television remote. Ian hurried to put himself between his little brother and the TV. "Uhu, don't you dare even think about it!" He smiled as the surprise was obvious on Liam's face. Pleased to see he could still surprise the people around him and especially the kid standing in front of him, Ian went to look in the cupboard for board games he could play with his brother. He ended up picking four of these, most of them had several missing pieces but it didn't matter. They played for a couple hours, Gallagher-style, laughing like they didn't have a care in the world, like Ian wasn't being manic, like Liam hadn't been left on his own for most of the past few months. Nothing was important but the sound of their laughter and the way Liam giggled.
Eventually, they both got tired of cheating, winning or losing. Ian let his sibling tidy the mess they had made. "I'm gonna rest just for a while, ok buddy?" He stroked Liam's hair and climbed up the stairs. He didn't feel tired at all but he felt like lying down. He had a ton of energy at the moment and he needed to channel all of it. Otherwise, he was pretty sure he would explode.
