Notes- Tim's parents are entirely figments of my imagination, with the exception of Sarah, of course.

________________________________________________________________________

The Parent Trap

Tony DiNozzo half-listened to the one-sided conversation as he watched Bruce Willis shoot another bad guy on screen. He smiled, his attention taken back to Die Hard; he loved this movie. He was trying to teach Tim some decent movie-sense -Tim had actually been enjoying it too- but then the phone rang. So far, there had been an awful lot of listening and not much talking from Tim and he looked just a tiny bit worried.

"OK, mom. I'll be there," Tony heard him say eventually, then sigh. "Yes, mom, we'll both be there. Bye, mom."

Tony turned to him, eyebrow raised in question. "Well, I think I guessed that was your mom, but dare I ask where you just promised to go?"

"Not me, Tony," Tim told him with just the tiniest hint of glee. "Us. It seems that my sister has told them that I'm with someone and they want to meet you. Mom has invited us to go and stay for the weekend; she's having a party for my dad's birthday."

Tony frowned. "They're OK with it?" When they had told Sarah, she hadn't taken the news too well to begin with, taking a few days to adjust to the fact that her brother was in a relationship with a man. He saw the smile on Tim's face falter. "What aren't you telling me?"

"Well, it seems that Sarah neglected to mention one tiny detail," Tim confessed. "My mom is under the impression that Tony is Toni, as in Antonia."

"And, naturally, you didn't set her straight."

Tim blushed slightly. "I intended to but I thought it might be better to do it in person, not over the phone." He met Tony's accusing gaze and sighed. "Fine. I chickened out, OK?"

Tony couldn't help but laugh; this was going to be an interesting weekend. He pulled Tim back against him, where he had been sitting before moving to answer the phone, resting against Tony. Draping his arm back around Tim's shoulders, he leaned forward to press a kiss to the younger man's hair.

"Relax, Timmy; it'll be fine."

"Easy for you to say," Tim muttered, but he appreciated the support.

"Just enjoy the movie and forget about it." Tony pointed to the TV. "Hey, this is the best bit coming up- see? Wait for it…"

Tim watched the movie, knowing that Tony was just trying to distract him and was grateful for him doing so. He could really kick Sarah for dropping him in it like this; why the hell couldn't she have just told mom that Tony was a guy? He had the feeling that this was her revenge for him keeping it a secret from her for so long.

--------

Five days later, after convincing Gibbs to give them both the weekend off, Tony looked across at Tim, in the driver's seat. Tim was gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. He was staring straight ahead, his eyes wide. Tony knew how nervous his boyfriend was, but if he continued like this, he was going to have a panic attack before they actually reached his parents' house.

"Timmy, pull the car over."

Tim did, turning off in to a side street and stopping.

"Now let go of the death-grip on the wheel. That's good." Tony unclipped his seatbelt and turned in his seat. "Now come here."

Leaning over he unfastened Tim's seatbelt and reached up to manoeuvre Tim in his seat. Tim let himself be drawn into the kiss, Tony's hand creeping around to the back of his neck, holding him closer.

"Are you calmer now?" Tony asked, smiling, a few moments later as he drew back. "Right, let's go and get this over with, shall we?"

Tim nodded and started the car again, pulling back out onto the main road and the last five minutes of their journey. Pulling up in his parents' driveway, he was alarmed to see that there were two other cars there, apart from his parents'. He had kind of hoped to get the introductions and explanations over while it was just them, before anyone else arrived.

He parked up and got out, leaving their bags for the moment, just in case this didn't go too well. Not that he was telling Tony that, however. He felt the light touch of Tony's hand at the base of his back and it steeled his resolve. He was an NCIS agent for goodness' sake; he faced down criminals and terrorists on a daily basis. He could handle his mom.

He knocked on the door once before letting himself in, getting no further than a couple of steps into the kitchen.

"Timothy! You made it." His mom ushered him in, looking around the door for his guest. She stopped, frowned, then turned to Tim. "I thought you were bringing Antonia?"

Tim took a deep breath, reached back to Tony, bringing him inside. "Not exactly. Mom, this is Tony DiNozzo. My boyfriend."

Tim's mom got the same rabbit-in-the-headlights expression that Tony had seen on Tim so many times before, her mouth dropping open. If not for the situation, Tony thought, it would have been quite amusing.

"Timothy, glad you could make it." An older man came into the kitchen, glanced between them and asked, "Is there something wrong?"

Tim's mom seemed to snap out of it and turned to her husband.

"Timothy brought a guest," she said. "This is Tony, Timothy's… partner."

Just then, Sarah came in to join them, a mischievous smile on her face. Tim's assessment had been spot on; she had just wanted to make him squirm. He narrowed his eyes at her and cast her a look that promised brotherly retribution. She looked to Tony and then to her parents and she scarpered back to the other room.

"This was a mistake," Tim said eventually, after a few more moments of silence. "I think we're going to go."

They were almost out of the door when Tim's dad called then back.

"Don't leave just yet, son. Look, it was a bit of a shock and it took a little while for your mother and I to take it in," he said. He turned to Tony. "I'm sorry about your welcome here. Maybe we could start again?"

Tony nodded, smiling; they were really trying. Holding out his hand, he said,

"Hi there, I'm Tony DiNozzo."

"Thomas McGee." The older man shook his hand. "And this is my wife, Angela."

Thomas led them into the lounge, where Sarah sat with another couple and an older woman. As they came in, everyone looked up.

"Timothy, come over here and give me a kiss," the old woman said, beaming.

Tim smiled fondly and did as she asked, crouching in front of her chair and giving her a peck on the cheek.

"Hey, Grandma." He saw her curious looks back towards Tony and figured it was better to get this over with, like ripping off a band-aid. Standing, he went back to Tony's side. "Tony, this is my Aunt Margie and Uncle Charles and Grandma Ella. Everyone, this is Tony DiNozzo."

"Tony is Timothy's partner," his mom supplied helpfully, earning a grateful look from her son.

Tim's grandma looked over them both, then nodded. "Well, come over here, young man."

Tim smiled apologetically and nudged Tony forward. He went to her and crouched before her.

"So, you are our Timothy's boyfriend? Is that the right word?" Seeing the alarmed look he shot back to Tim, she laughed. "Don't look so shocked, young man; I watch Oprah."

Tony smiled. "Yes, ma'am, I am."

"Now don't you start calling me ma'am," she told him. "You make me sound old. Call me Ella."

"Yes, ma'am- sorry, Ella."

"DeNotzo, did you say?" she asked. "Where are you from?"

"DiNozzo," Tony corrected. "It's Italian, but I was born in America."

Ella smiled happily. "Italian, how wonderful! So, what do you do?"

"Mom, Tony is a guest. He might not want to answer lots of questions," Tim's mother began, coming over to them, but Ella waved her away.

"It's fine, Mrs McGee, honestly." Tony turned back to Ella. "I'm a Special Agent with NCIS. I work with Tim."

"Do you ever get to boss him around?" she asked, with a gleam in her eye.

Tony nodded; despite his apprehension, he liked Ella.

"All the time," he replied, grinning.

Ella and Tony both glanced back at Tim when they heard the resigned sigh from him and then smiled at each other.

"I think we'll get along just fine," she told Tony. "Now, come and sit down by me so I can tell you all about Timothy. Angela has some photographs around here somewhere…"

Later that evening, the rest of Tim's family arrived. The house was full, with the men out in the garden tending to the barbeque and drinking beer whilst most of the women had gathered in the kitchen with a few bottles of wine and enough gossip to last them for hours. Nieces and nephews ran around, playing ball games or just annoying their parents.

"I'm sorry about Grandma," Tim said, once he managed to get Tony alone for a while. "I should have warned you that she can be a bit outspoken."

"I liked her," Tony assured him. "Especially when she got out those baby photos…"

He laughed at the groan from Tim, who assumed, quite correctly that he wasn't going to hear the end of those pictures for some time yet.

Tony glanced back around the corner of the staircase to see whether anyone was around. He didn't want to make things uncomfortable for Tim; even though his family seemed to have accepted his rather unexpected choice of partner, he didn't think they were ready for seeing anything else. Since no one was around, however… Manoeuvring himself closer to Tim, he leaned in to slant his mouth over Tim's. For a moment, Tim backed away from the kiss, glancing about nervously.

"Relax, there's no one around," Tony told him.

This time, Tim kissed him back, allowing Tony to pull him closer, hands around his waist. There was the sound of footsteps in the hallway and then,

"Honey, have you seen Timothy?"

Without missing a beat, Sarah's voice replied, "Yeah; on the stairs, making out with Tony."

Tim backed off and sighed, resting his forehead against the wall. "Sometimes, I really hate my sister."

Tony was sitting on the stair next to Tim when Angela tentatively poked her head around the corner. He felt like a teenager getting caught sneaking about with his boyfriend; the whole thing was actually funny.

"Sorry, I, um, didn't mean to interrupt," she began.

Tim's cheeks pinked. "Nothing going on, mom."

"Well, I just came to tell you that the food is ready," she said.

The two men got to their feet to follow her, passing Sarah on the way.

"Some day, when you're least expecting it," Tim promised her, "I'm going to remember this weekend." He smiled pleasantly. "Watch your back, sis."

Tony chuckled and waited until they were out of earshot before he leaned over to whisper,

"You know, you being all threatening-big-brother is very sexy."

By the time the evening was over, Tony was glad. Not that he hadn't enjoyed himself- he had –but there was only so much playing nice he could do. Right now, he just wanted some peace and quiet. Tim's mom had put them in the guest room and now he curled up in bed and dragged Tim's body against him, getting comfortable. When Tim tried to shift away from him, he stubbornly refused to move his arm, holding him in place.

"Tony, cut it out!"

Tony rolled his eyes in the darkness. "Relax, would you? We're going to sleep, nothing more."

Tim sighed loudly but some of the tension left his body. "I know. Tony?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for coming with me this weekend. I mean, you didn't have to; they're my relatives," Tim said.

Tony kissed the back of his neck lightly. "I didn't mind, really." He yawned, getting settled down to go to sleep. Tim could almost hear the smile in Tony's voice when he added, "Besides, I'm expecting a nice reward when we get home for behaving myself all weekend."

"Deal."

---------

End.