CHAPTER TWO
I slowly started to stir, not yet opening my eyes, but I immediately knew two things. It was bright, and it was chilly. I raised my head and widened my eyes and saw that I had nothing but my boxers on. I looked around, worried about the zombies that were pouring in, at least according to what I last recalled, but there was nothing, no one. I saw I was in a forest of some kind, somewhere that I did not recognize. But why the hell was I naked?
I sat up and looked to my left, and I saw a backpack on the ground. Weird. I opened it, and inside I found a torch, a bottle of water, a can of lamb rations with a pull tab top, a bandage, and some sort of carpenter's belt type thing that had 7 or 8 pockets and loops in it. That's it. I had nothing else, in the middle of nowhere, with no one else around, with no way to know where the hell I was.
Wait a second, there was something smaller in the backpack, something metal. I reached down in the bottom and pulled out what appeared to be some type of compass. I had never used one before, but it couldn't be that hard to figure out, right?
I stood up and then suddenly I remembered. She was gone. She was dead. She was shot by that fcking soldier, Sorrow. She was eaten. She was gone. I sobbed, finally taking a moment to try to come to terms with it, with my situation, and then my thoughts drifted to my kids. The schools had been evacuated, but were they safe. I had to get moving, to get somewhere.
I walked, and I walked. I found a few trash bags laying around, and never thought to look in them until I saw a book sticking out of one. I pulled it out and it was an instructional book on how to how to skin an animal and turn it's hide into leather. I don't really know why, but I put it in my bag.
I kept walking, and happened upon duffel bag. Inside were 3 bottles of water and 2 cans of lamb rations.
Other than the garbage and the duffel bag, I found nothing else. I found no one. No person, no civilization, no buildings, nothing. I had no phone, no way to communicate with anyone, no way to call for help, not that anyone would respond, I thought.
'How long had I been knocked out?' I wondered. And who dropped me here in the middle of god knows where and stripped me of my clothes but yet left me a little food, water, a light source, and a bandage? At least the left me the dignity of my underwear.
My thoughts were interrupted by a sound coming from the side of me. Some bushes stirred. I stood completely still, not sure what to do. Was it a person? Was it one of them? Was it safe?
Finally, I mustered the courage to call out. "Hello? Anyone there?" The bushes shook, and out ran a chicken. In the middle of the forest, a god damned chicken.
It was then that the other entity that was near decided to make its presence known. I was grabbed from behind, and I turned around, and a zombie was there, wanting to chew me up!
I stumbled back, shocked for a moment, then realized I'd better high-tail it away! I started running as fast as my two legs could go, through the bushes, through the trees, and I kept running and running. I ran so much I almost felt like Forrest Gump.
My breath became heavy and short and I realized I must have been running for who knows how long, so I stopped, took a chance, and turned around. Nothing. There was no zombie chasing me. Phew!
I turned back around to keep heading in the direction I had been going, and it was then that I saw HIM.
He looked right back at me, pity and sorrow in his eyes, full of regret and remorse.
I started to open my mouth, but I really didn't know what to say. I wanted to cuss him out. I wanted to scream and yell at him. Hell, I wanted to tackle him down and beat the living shit out of him, but I didn't. Why? I don't really know. Maybe because deep down somewhere in the depths of my subconscious, I knew that he hadn't meant it. It wasn't intentional, it was a messy situation and I guess I could see that from where he had stood it must have looked like a group of zombies coming at me.
But still, he shot her. He put a bullet in her chest, and then the b*stard pulled me away. I could have saved her! She might not have been dead! I could have carried her with us to the gate! There was a chance!
Wasn't there?
I mean, she wasn't eaten alive was she? I hadn't heard her scream when they started ripping her precious skin and tissue from her bones. Had she been dead?
Still, he shot her, and that was enough. He caused her death, even if it was the zombies that killed her.
"Hey man, you have no idea how sorry..." I put my hand up.
"Don't you even say it. I don't want to hear that word come out of your mouth. I could have fought that zombie off enough for her and I to get away. I could have protected her. I could have saved her, and she would be with me here, now. But no. You had to open fire. You had to shoot. You shot her. You killed her. You took away my life, my love, my reason for living. You took away my soul. You killed her. You fucking bastard."
Surprisingly, I had said all that in a calm voice, which kind of scared me, because I should be raging. I should be killing him, taking him to the ground, choking the life out of him. Yet I was eerily calm. Stern in my voice, but calm. That really did scare me.
He opened his mouth to speak. I put my hand up again. "What on earth do you think you could possibly say to me that would be of any good, hmm? What the hell do you think could come out your mouth that could make anything better?"
"Look man, I know you're pissed. I know you're hurt, but all I saw when I turned around was two bodies falling into you. One was for sure a zombie, and the other had her back to me and I had no way, no way at all of knowing she was not another zombie. I thought you were dead. Hell, you were dead. That zombie was getting ready to eat your chest. Like it or not, despite the unfortunate circumstance, I saved your fucking life. I shot that zombie and he didn't eat you. I got you to the gate. What the fuck happened after….."
He kept talking but I stopped listening. I could feel the anger finally building. It was boiling, and I was near explosion.
"…that if I hadn't done it, you would be dead, and maybe I would too.
"Unfortunate? UNFORTUNATE?" I yelled. You kill my wife, and you call it unfortunate? You know what Sorrow, mister react on the fly military hotshot, mister 'I saved your life.' FUCK YOU! You know I am pissed? You have NO idea. You know I am hurt? You know nothing about hurt. I lost her, not you. She was my wife, not yours. You saved my life? What a fucking joke, man! You didn't save my life, you killed it. You killed me. I am dead without her." I fell to the ground, sitting down and started sobbing into my hands. "I am dead without her….."
It was silent for what seemed like eons. Then he walked over to me and stood over me, and it was only then that I really realized that he, too, had the same type of backpack I did, and that he too, was not clothed. He had no uniform on, no gun, no hat, no, he was in his camo underwear, just like me. And that underwear was right near my head.
"Can you please get your junk away from my face? Seriously?"
We both kind of chuckled, awkwardly and halfheartedly, and he backed up. "Sorry."
I stood up, brushed my legs off, and stared at the sky. It had to be about 5ish in the afternoon. I had been walking all day. I took the water out of my backpack and took a sip, then replaced it.
My eyes finally settled on him, and that's when he spoke again, and this time, I didn't put up my hand.
"Look, uh, sir? Hell I don't ever recall getting your name."
"Rizzano. Just Rizzano."
"Look, Rizz, you're…"
"No, I said it's Rizzano. Only my friends call me Rizz, and you are very much not my friend."
"Right, sorry, Rizzano. Look, you're right. I have no idea how pissed you are. NO idea. And you have every right to be. EVERY right. But I do know hurt. I do know pain. Before I got assigned to that tent outpost, I had been searching for my kids. When I told you my wife didn't know where they were, it wasn't because I had talked to her. It was because she was dead. One of those THINGS ate her face, and I wasn't there to stop it. My brother called me and told me, witnessed it, and was crying to me because instead of trying to save her, he ran. And that made me angry, that made me PISSED. But you're right, I don't know how pissed you are, and I don't blame you for being that way, but I lost my soul too, my life, my everything."
How dare he try to show he's as human as I am and make me feel sorry for him, I thought.
He continued on. "You have no idea how deeply sorry I am, how truly remorseful I feel for shooting her, but I am certain I didn't kill her. I shot her on the right side, not anywhere near her heart or any vital organs."
Oh, I was fuming again. Just when I thought I had calmed down. "Do you hear yourself? You shot her in the chest, in the right side, so she was still alive when she fell. You should have let me pick her up and carry her! You should have let me save her! There was a chance we could have made it together!"
"Look, Rizzano, those zombies were right on top of her when she fell to the ground. There was no time to play the hero, no time to spend grabbing her and picking her up, and there was no time to stand around and mourn. We had to move. We would have been next!"
I opened up my mouth to argue, but deep down I knew he was right. I was pissed, and I didn't want to admit it, but he was right. She fell, and within mere seconds she was being eaten. I KNOW he didn't mean to shoot her, but I just didn't care. It was unfair.
"Look, I don't want to talk about it anymore. I don't know where I am, or where I am going, but I can't just stand here with you anymore. I am wasting precious time looking for some type of civilization to where I can try somehow to track down my kids. So excuse me, but I have to go." I walked past him in the direction I had been going all day.
"Um, Rizzano, I came from that way. For miles. All day I walked, from that direction. There's nothing back there."
I stopped, turned, and looked at him. F*ck him for helping me.
"Fine then I'll go uh…."I pulled out my compass and fidgeted with it. Then I pointed. "That way, east. Yeah."
Sorrow chuckled.
"What?" I said, looking indignant.
"That's direction you're pointing is south west. You're using that compass all wrong. Here, let me show you." Reluctantly, I handed him the compass and he showed and explained to me how to use it and read it.
Without any gratitude, I started walking south west. I walked about 10 steps, stopped, sighed, and turned around to him. "F*uck!" I said out loud.
"Problems?" Sorrow asked.
Sighing again, I replied, "I guess, if you want, we should stick together. Like it or not, it's better to have someone to be with to watch each other's back, and you have skills that I just don't have. Training that could be useful. And I see you have a knife. Was that in your back pack?"
"No, I found it in a hollow tree stump, of all places."
"Well, anyhow, even though I hate your guts, you can help me. I did find a little food and water. Do you have any?" I asked.
"Only the bottle of water and can of lamb rations that came in the backpack." He said as he pulled them out. "Oh and this torch and bandage, but no, nothing else.
"Well then you help me, and I'll share my extra food and water."
"Sounds like a plan then. To the south west?"
"To the south west."
