It was hitting her now. Lying to Brian wasn't helping her feel any better at all, it just made her feel worse. All that had just happened she was eventually coming to terms with. She couldn't cry. She mustn't cry. Not yet anyway. Not while he was still here. She just had to stay strong and hope her face didn't give her away. She hadn't known them that well yet all she seemed to want to do was curl up in a ball and cry. "River, are you all right?" He spoke kindly like he meant every word that he was saying and she knew he was. She knew how she wanted to reply but she couldn't for his sake instead all she said was "Yes, it doesn't really matter now all that matters is that you're all right." Her words sounded sure yet they held no meaning whatsoever. Her hands made sudden movements as she pulled yet another lever down on the TARDIS console and she was sure her eyes were close to welling up with tears. "Doctor, do you mind if I go to our room for a minute? You know I need to write this down and your rules are against you looking." She was looking for a quick excuse out of this situation. She needed time alone to cry. "Of course, River." She knew that he could tell this was just a diversion but she stopped pulling levers all the same and headed of into the labyrinth that was the TARDIS.

As she tore down the endless corridors all she could think about were the past few hours. She may not have grown up her parents in the normal way but they were as dear to her as they would be to any other child and they had just died right in front of her. When she finally reached the door she pulled it aside so hard that she hurt her wrist again. The regeneration energy was still at work and it had not yet completely healed. Her wrist was just another scar that the day would leave on her forever never to be forgotten. As she sat down at the grand, Victorian dressing table in the corner of the room to write in her diary it suddenly occurred to her. This was her diary, her book, not just for adventures but for her to write things she thought were important. That night she wrote like she had never written before bringing each and every word she wrote to life with all the meaning she could find and all the time she cried for every memory provoked something new for her to write and something new for her to remember. It had been 3 hours since she had last spoken to the Doctor. He quietly pulled open the door and the sudden creak caused her to suddenly awake from her world of thoughts. "River it's being three hours. Are you sure you're all right…" He spoke gently and with love. As she looked up from her diary he could see her eyes bloodshot and puffy from each and every teardrop that she had cried. "No, no I aren't…"