Hello everyone. Thank you to everyone who read my story and I really hope you enjoyed it. And thank you so much to those who reviewed. I really appreciate that. I also want to apologise for the fact that my previous story had paragraphs that had been pasted twice over. Since I'm new to fanficiton, it took me some time to figure out how to properly update an edit so I'm so sorry for any confusion that might have caused.

As always, apologies for any grammatical errors and I hope you enjoy this story as well. Please let me know what you thought about it.

Disclaimer : The characters are property of Shonda Rhimes and Grey's Anatomy


The Way I Loved You

Jackson was confused. He and April have been married for sometime now and things were going pretty much amazing. He never thought that the transition from been ... well whatever they had been to been married would be so effortless. Never in his life had he thought he'd be someone who would even want to be married. The last girl he felt something even remotely close to what he felt about April had been Lexie and even then marriage had been the furthest thing from his mind. He used to see it as been restraining and unromantic, as ironic as that sounds. But now he realises that he just hadn't yet met someone who he was so sure he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He wanted April, and only April for the rest of his life. And he wanted that on paper. He also wanted to buy her a huge ring that would blind any man who tried to hit on her, but he had to go with a more modest one than he had in mind considering how, the more he thought of it, April wouldn't have appreciated the sentiment.

He loved their marriage. It felt like the smartest decision he had ever made in his life. And he knew that marriage wasn't easy but right now, they were in a great place. So Jackson couldn't for the life of him understand why April was bringing up with this whole "compatibility test" thing.

"Come on Jackson ! It's going to be so much fun !" April said from her seat on the kitchen island. Jackson was on dinner duty today but been the perfectionist that she was, April had to sit by and supervise. She insisted that she was merely keeping him company but Jackson knew her inside and out. She was making sure he didn't burn the chicken. "We just have to go in and answer some questions and the minister tells us how compatible we are"

This was a bad idea.

"I don't know babe. It's just not my kind of thing." Jackson realised that maybe acting as though he was uninterested was the best route to go. Telling April that he thought it would be a miracle if they even got 50% would be unwise.

Jackson shut off the stove and walked towards April to stand in between her legs. Instinctively, she wrapped her legs around his waist and put her arms around his neck. He placed his hands on her waist and pulled her closer to the edge of the counter.

"Yes but it's my kind of thing and I do things that you like that I don't really like all that much just because it makes you happy. " April said, with a pout. He couldn't resist kissing her pout. The pout was dangerous. It was too adorable and if he saw it for too long he wouldn't be able to resist doing whatever she wanted. And he had to resist for their own good.

"You're taking about Sneakercon aren't you ?" Jackson asked, smirking.

"Jackson it was convention ... On SNEAKERS. We walked around looking at SNEAKERS ... The whole day. And I didn't complain once." April replied.

It's true. April could care less about sneakers but since he had this "weird obsession" as April insisted calling his, as he saw it, slight enthusiasm towards sneakers, she had accompanied him to Sneakercon without having to be asked twice. But Jackson was more than willing to return the favour. He'd gladly accompany her to Disneyland. She reacted to Disneyland the same way a 6 year old would and he never really cared for cartoons. But this ... This could affect their relationship. It could pop their blissful marriage bubble where everything was amazing and smooth sailing at this moment.

"Jackson please. For me. Because you love me. Aaaaannnndddd because you owe for ruining my other wedding." April said, with a smirk on her face.

"How long are you planning on cashing in on that one huh ?" Jackson asked rolling his eyes.

"Just this once. Promise" she said, kissing him and tightening her legs around his body. He lifted her up and started carrying her towards their bedroom.

"Fine. But you know ... Just remember. I told you so."

April squealed and kissed him passionately. He realised he might as well make the most out of tonight. Once this test comes back, he won't be getting laid for a long time.


"April. Come on. You promised you wouldn't be upset." Jackson said as he closed the door behind him. The day had gone great. They'd gone to the minister's office, taken the "test" which Jackson knew while he was writing the answers that they'd flunk, thanks to questions like, "Does religion affect your view of the world ?" and "What are your views on hand-me-downs?" Yes, that one had actually been a question, a question he had a very different answer to than April did. The truth was him and April were more different than he liked to admit. More different than him hating oatmeal and oatmeal been April's favourite breakfast. They were raised differently, had different perspectives of the world and expected different things from their lives. That's what had made her so interesting to Jackson when they were friends. He loved been able to get along with someone whom he couldn't in a personal level relate to very much.

He honestly didn't think their differences were much of a challenge to their marriage either. He loved how she challenged him. It kept things interesting. But their compatibility was a lot more important to April than he had imagined. He couldn't really understand why but it was clear she was upset. She had been quiet the whole car ride. She usually talked incessantly and sang along with the radio. He realized now how much he'd gotten used to her doing that, that when the car was silent it felt empty.

She had begun cleaning. That was Phase 2 of April Kepner's Guide To Been Upset With Your Husband. Phase 1 had already happened. The silence, in which she analysed every little thing that was right and wrong about what made her upset. Phase 2 was cleaning their already spotless house. By the time Jackson put his keys on the hook - he needed as many brownie points as he could get - she had already begun to wipe the invisible dirt on their coffee table.

"April, I told you this was a bad idea. And now you're mad at me and we're fighting over something so useless." He sat down on the couch and tried to pull her onto his lap. She stepped out his grasp and looked at him.

"I'm not mad at you Jackson. I'm just ... Nothing. It's nothing. I'm going to start on dinner." April said as she headed towards the kitchen.

Jackson walked into the kitchen. She was scanning the fridge but he could tell by how tense her body was that she was thinking about something else, something clearly not related to dinner. He walked behind her and put his arms around her waist, kissing the back of her neck. He hands lifted her shirt and put his arm on her skin softly caressing it. Jackson had never been good with feelings. He didn't talk about them. Rest assured that he tried harder these days for April. Mostly because not talking about them was what messed them up in the first place. But it was still tough. So physical affection was how he communicated best. Generally whatever emotion he was feeling he usually buried it with sex. But sometimes he communicated through sex.

"Jackson ! Really ? I definitely do not want to have SEX with you right now !" She turned around, slightly pushed him away and walked off.

"Because you're mad at me ! You only ever not want to have sex when you're mad at me " Jackson knew she was walking off to avoid this, but he was determined to resolve this. Even if it meant talking it out, because clearly the other way wasn't going to work. "Just admit it April. You always tell me that the easiest way you can resolve something is if you admit there's something to be resolved in the first place. So take your own advice and admit you're mad."

"Fine ! Yes. I'm mad" April finally stopped moving. But she was still not calm. She was wringing her hands together and almost jumping up and down in the same spot. "I'm upset. Okay ? I'm really upset but I'm not mad or ... or upset with you. I'm just mad ... And ..."

"And upset. Yes I know" Jackson made no attempt of moving near her. She needed time to cool down. If he moved she'd just go off racing. "Well ... If you're not mad or upset at me, what are you mad and upset about ?"

April didn't reply for a while. She just stared at her hands. Finally, she looked up. "We got 20%. 20% Jackson. That's like ... I mean ... 20% you know. What if ... I don't know I'm just upset ... About that. I'm upset that we got 20% because ... I don't know why. No ... No I do ... Or maybe not... I don't …." She was rambling. Jackson had a feeling she already knew why she was acting like this. He had a feeling she just didn't want to share because she thought it would hurt his feelings and he had a hunch that he knew why.

"Sweetheart. Did you and Maththew do this test? Before the wedding ?" She slowly nodded. "How much did you get?" He looked at her curiously, although he suspected he already knew the answer to that.

April's hesitation confirmed his suspicions.

"You got a 100% didn't you?" Jackson asked. His face fell. He saw that April noticed his change of expression. She sighed.

"Jackson ... I ..." She began.

"No … No no it's cool. It's cool. I'm gonna ... I'm gonna go ... Um ... I'm gonna go sleep now." He said as he walked off and closed the bedroom door a little louder than he intended.

Jackson feared the worst. Maybe she was regretting it; regretting marrying him. Maybe she wished she hadn't run to him and married Matthew instead. He fell back down on the bed, fully clothed and got under the covers. He didn't think he could survive if April left him; if she regretted them. She was the best thing that had ever happened to him. April was it. He was serious when he told his mom that she was "the one". He had never and could never love anyone the way he loved her. He couldn't imagine life without her as his wife.

He heard April slowly open the door and walk into the room. She lifted the sheet carefully and shuffled underneath it. He turned to face her as she lay down facing him.

"I'm so sorry." She began as she placed a small kiss on the tip of his nose. "I am an awful person. I just ... I'm scared." She admitted. He didn't think he wanted to hear this.

"I'm scared because I love you so much. And that scares me because I've never felt like this before." She whispered, quietly.

Jackson was taken aback. This wasn't really the confession he was expecting. He expected her to tell him that maybe they weren't the best idea. But not .. This.

"I loved Mathew. I did. I loved him in my own way. I wouldn't have agreed to marry someone I didn't love. I just didn't love him the way I love you. You're ... Frustrating and complicated and ... You drive me crazy sometimes and you .. You infuriate me." She chuckled.

"Thanks for the compliments babe. " He said, still unsure of where this was going.

"I feel things with you ... About you that I've never felt before and I feel it in a way that I've never felt before ... And that scares me. It scares me to be so in love with someone who drives me crazy in two completely different ways. Because, if .. If you leave, or if I lose you or if one day you decide that you don't want me anymore because ... Because we're too different ... Jackson I ..." He was speechless.

"Wait ... You don't ... This isn't about you ... Regretting us ?" Jackson asked as he wiped away a tear that had fell.

"WHAT ?!" She looked shocked. He realized that he'd been way off mark. "You thought .. Jackson why would you ... OF COURSE NOT. No. NO. Of course not ! Marrying you was ... It's the best decision of my life. I'd run to you all over again, everyday of my life. I will never, for no reason ... Ever ever regret that. I can't believe ..."

Jackson kissed her then. He kissed her with so much force that April was actually pushed on to her back. She laughed, breathlessly, after he pulled away. He lay back down and pulled her against his chest, interlocking their feet.

"I'm sorry I jumped to that conclusion." Jackson began. "I get it you know. How you feel. I understand that. I feel the same way. I mean, you admitted it yourself babe. You're crazy." He heard her chuckle.

"I love you so much that sometimes it overwhelms me. I guess that's why it took me so long to admit it."

"I know." She said, as she placed a kiss on his neck. "Mathew was nice. He was perfect actually. He said and did everything right. He got along great with my family. We were ..." Her voice trailed off. She sounded like she had a sudden epiphany and Jackson knew exactly what it was that she had realised.

"Compatible ?" Jackson asked, looking down at her.

"Yes. Compatible. We were compatible and it was so ... Oh god. I feel horrible saying this. It was comfortable. And comfortable is ..." She looked up at Jackson, with a guilty face. She didn't have the heart to admit it.

"Boring ?" Jackson said, holding back a laugh. He couldn't lie. Part of him secretly loved hearing her say that. "Yeah. I get that too. Stephanie was nice. We had a lot in common. It was fun. But I didn't love her. I never felt anything close to it." Jackson did feel bad admitting that out loud. April drove him mad. She was this crazy, complicated person who made him feel so many intense emotions all at once, but that was the reason he kept coming back. One of the reasons he was so in love with her. Nobody kept him on his toes the way April did. Loving April was risky. She was worth it, though and it's also not like he had much of an option. He could never love someone else. She was the only one for him, crazy and all. It was hard realizing that had they both been true to themselves they could've avoided a lot of the pain they caused not only to other people but also to each other.

"We're different . And that's fine. That's going to be hard, true. But it's also what I love the most about us. About you." Jackson said, kissing the top of her head. "April the fact that you want us to work so much is the reason we're going to be fine. Because you'll fight for us. I'll fight for us." She smiled at him and nuzzled her nose against his neck.

"We'll be fine. I love you so much. That's what the stupid test didn't ask. How much I love you. That's all that matters." She said, smiling.

"Exactly. Now that that's done, can we please go spend time doing things we are very compatible at." He winked suggestively while pulling her up to straddle him.

"Yes we can." April said giggling before she bent down to capture his lips.


THANK YOU FOR READING !

If you have any prompts leave them in the comments, or send them to me on my tumblr account : "astoldbyacertifiedunicorn".

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P.S : This was inspired by the song "The Way I Loved You" by Taylor Swift. I always thought that was a perfect song for April in terms of her feelings towards Mathew and Jackson. Also, I recall April and Mathew taking a test sometime before their wedding so that was also another point of reference.

PPS : I am working on your prompts. I had already begun this one before I published the first so I thought I'd get it over with before I start working on the prompts, so expect those in the stories to come.