Chapter 2: Revelations
Edward's Perspective

Perhaps I should haven't let myself be blinded by the petty relationship Jacob and Bella shared that night, maybe I would have acted with more rationality if I had. Of course I wasn't the one that initially attacked Bella but I was as to blame as much as Jacob was; I was the one baiting him after all, trying to get him to do something so that Bella wouldn't trust him anymore. I should have prevented it; it shouldn't have happened in the first place. Bella shouldn't be laying upon a hospital bed because of my actions- the consequences should have been mine. This was also emphasised by the pure fact every single member of my family- apart from Esme and Carlisle of course- told me the same thing, perhaps not to my face but it wasn't exactly hard for me to know what they were thinking. Both Carlisle and Esme seemed to have absolutely no views on the matter, but I think that they were just keeping their minds else where so to not hurt me. It wasn't like it mattered however; the guilt still danced around me no matter what my adoptive parents tried to do and nothing at all could deny the fact that I had hurt her.

I had hurt Bella.

'Come on Edward, you know you didn't mean to hurt her,' Alice's thoughts said to me, taking precautions even in her own mind as to not let her real emotions slip past. She was just trying to help me but I found I couldn't appreciate it- it was like I was just this one large black hole and anything that anyone said, thought or did to me didn't matter. Even now I could feel her concerned gaze fixated upon me through the glass separating her in the corridor from me at Bella's bedside, my head still buried within my hands since Bella had been moved here a few days ago.

"Go away Alice," I mumbled through my fingers, unintentionally speaking in a tone that was much harsher than usual, even when I know she was just worried about me. I hadn't even spoken for the last few days- I only spoke now for her benefit so she might settle down for a while and not carry on thinking that I had become comatose. Even though I couldn't decipher her feelings like Jasper can I could easily tell that she was hurt by my response, but even when she voiced this aloud in her thoughts I still couldn't bring myself to care, I was far too wrapped up in my own self-misery to do that. Plus any of the concern that managed to squeeze past my emotional defense laid with the motionless figure next to me. It wasn't always like this but over the first few hours most of my family came to realise that for no matter how long they talked to me I wouldn't respond, and now it was only Carlisle that made any effort to try and keep a conversation going. I guess the reason why I chose him to sometimes reply to was for the fact he was the one that was helping Bella now while all I could do was sit and wait, the fact that he was a respected doctor being highly useful in this instance since i'm pretty sure I gave up on the illusion of human breathing a long time ago. I couldn't even remember the last time I blinked; I just stared constantly at Bella through my fingers and that was it.

Carlisle came walking in at that very moment and began the routine procedure of glancing underneath the bandages upon her shoulder to examine his stitching before proceeding onto prodding gently at her chest to assess the recovery of the couple of ribs I had broken. I knew that vampires healed at a rate that was in no way comparable to humans but it still didn't calm my nerves, especially when she had yet to wake up yet. He knew that I could account for every single aspect that Bella's body partook in since I never left her side.

"Still no change?" He questioned me, his pen flashing across her chart as he wrote down his thoughts on her healing.

"She spoke again. The same thing as before, over and over-"

"Edward don't!" Bella's subconscious suddenly interjected, her pleading repeating over and over as I was certain she remembered the events of a few days prior. "Edward...please..." Her voice trailed off into silence in the same place as all the other times, right after the second time she spoke my name, as if it were of great hardship to do so. It made my heart darken with each time her nightmares happened, knowing that I was the cause of her bad dreams and there was nothing I could do to stop them, or sooth her. Even my very touch upon her hand threw her into screams if I tried, so in the end I just gave up and submitted into the clutches of my depression, allowing them to tighten around my throat just that little bit more.

"Is she ever going to wake up?" I asked out of pure misery, my voice sounding desperate as I yearned for the answer that she would be soon, even though I knew it would only be the exact same reply as the hundreds of times I had asked before. "It's been three days now... vampires are meant to have fast recovery systems..."

"We do, Edward," Carlisle began, his voice remaining in the same calm demeanor it was always in when he was talking with me, his words chosen with care as if I were nothing more than a child. His matter-of-fact tone ate away at my hopeful desires as he carried on, my eyes darkening just that little bit more because of the extra strain my turbulent emotions were creating. "But you have to remember these are not ordinary scrapes, these wounds are from werewolves. You have to be patient with her Edward."

"I'm sorry Jake... I couldn't help it..." Bella murmured, her sudden change in words drawing both Carlisle's attention and mine to her. This was one of the only times when against his own self-control Carlisle did something he tried to prevent, his thoughts slipping to how this new apology that had worked into my sleeping angel's conversation would affect me. It was also the first time he had stopped thinking about the medical dictionary, no longer reciting each word and definition from it in alphabetical order- something that had caused me a long time ago to stop listening to his thoughts no matter how curious I was about Bella's condition.

'I wonder how Edward is going to take this; surely she is apologising for him to Jacob about what happened.'

Even when I knew Carlisle was just concerned about me all this done was make me slip further into my despair, my head soon finding my hands while my eyes peered out to Bella to initiate my staring once again. I focused rigidly upon her motionless body and left no thoughts as to voice my answer to his concern, my ears soon listening to his fading footsteps before the click of the door was heard. That was when their thoughts began. It was a bit jumbled at first, but Esme soon found her voice and spoke as soon as he closed the door behind him, her eyes flickering briefly to me with a worried look on her face. She had been thinking I might go to the Volturi if something went wrong only to be squashed by her own inner arguments, believing that I would never do anything stupid like that again.

Of course I was thinking of doing something that stupid again. If Bella was destined to die, then so was I.

"How is he?"

"Much the same. If Bella wakes up i'm sure he'll be fine, but if it isn't soon I fear he may have to be forced into hunting; even though he doesn't need to feed everyday the emotional strain he is being put through is burning up energy rapidly, and his eyes are darkening with every hour that passes." His description of myself did earn my attention for a few moments as I vaguely listened to his words, my thoughts beginning to wonder how they would force me to hunt, I doubt I would let them take me from Bella. However it was then that I re-processed the whole conversation and came across the doubt of my angel's rousing- this voiced possibility that she might not ever wake up enough to separate my body from the largely uncomfortable hospital chair to the left of the bed and to the corridor where my family were still conversing.

"What do you mean if, Carlisle?" I demanded, my voice producing a raw anger I hadn't felt since I was holding Jacob in my grasp. Alice tried to calm me down slightly my pulling lightly on the sleeve of my ivory jumper but I gave even less notice to this than I gave to the strange looks I was receiving from the humans further up the corridor, instead deciding upon creating even more of a scene and repeating my question, but in a louder voice this time. "What do you mean if, Carlisle?"

"It is merely a word, Edward. It is impossible for me to say when she should be waking u-"

Carlisle didn't get the chance to explain fully as my eyes wandered back to the bedside and found the sheets no longer encapsulating my angel, her body no where to be seen within the small private room she had been placed thanks to his reputation at the hospital. The door lay ripped aside from the frame as I ignored the human trait of opening using the handle and sped inside, my fear growing with each second that passed as I began to search every single place that the room provided. I soon found her within the bathroom staring at the mirror with what I could only describe as an unsure look upon her face, calling my arms to cradle her waist with just a simple look; a dazzling look.

"Do you love me, even though i've changed?" Bella suddenly asked, my head already leaning towards her neck as I gave her a light shake, drawing both our attentions to the couple staring at us in the mirror.

"I will love you always Bella, no matter what happens." I was just about to kiss the back of her neck when a wolf's cry broke out in a soft whine, her arms instantly pushing mine away as she raced to the window and stared worriedly out of it, as if she were expecting to see Jacob from the second storey window of the hospital. My arms instinctively made their way around her waist as I joined her at the watching post, one of my hands soon releasing from the other to brush through her hair in a soothing way, much like a mother would do her concerned child.

"He's not here, love. Jacob left a few hours after we arrived," I murmured, pressing my lips to the spot between her shoulder blades in an extra aid to comfort her. I did know for a fact this did only supply her with a hint of truth, since I did neglect to mention that I sank my fangs into his neck and poisoned him with my venom. She didn't need his fate to worry about as well as her own. "He didn't want to stay."

"He...didn't?" Her voice was faltering now as she turned her head to the side and buried it in my chest, her eyes peering up at me through her fingers. "Did Carlisle get to look at him at least?"

I didn't get given the time to answer her question as the wolf cried out again in a longer, drawn out whine- almost as if it were calling to us directly- when Bella began to tremble, her head burying further until her expression was fully hidden from me. What I didn't know however was that she wasn't trying to block it out, in fact I only realised once I was laying on my back on the floor and Bella ran straight past me into the corridor that she was instead plotting against me, and didn't want her emotions to give her away. I didn't stay down for long as I performed a light flip back onto my feet and soon chased after Bella, just managing to wrap my arms around her and force her to stop before she got too near the open corridor window. She squirmed in protest as I lifted her easily so her feet dangled a few inches off the ground to prevent another escape, her body soon shifting in my grasp until her knees rested against my chest while her back lay supported by my hands.

"Bella," I said calmly, completely ignoring the fact that my family had all rose from their seats at that point from the commotion. "You can't just rush out at every howl. How can you tell if it is Jacob or not?"

"How can you tell me that it isn't?" She snapped, her expression growing angrier by the second.

"I can't."

"Then let me go."

"No."

"Why?" She snarled, the enraged noise she made sounding strange from her lips.

"Because I can't bear to think that I might lose you again," I whispered, my gaze dropping from her's in my guilt. I knew I was being selfish by trying to keep her here, but I couldn't seem to let her go- moreover I couldn't make myself let her go. We remained quiet for a few moments as we just stood locked in place with Bella still balanced on my chest, neither of us wanting to break the awkward silence that ensued. She gazed after her finger with an innocent expression as she traced a line from my cheek down to my neck, her breath curling upon my ear as she leaned in close to speak, not daring to go above a whisper.

"I love you."

I felt a light peck on my neck as I was suddenly thrown backwards into Emmett; her legs having used my chest as an aid to back flip gracefully from my grip and effectively push me a distance that was just enough to let her make it through the window in under a couple of seconds. My family shared my confusion from the sudden turn of events apart Alice, the normal look she held telling me she knew this would happen yet she purposely pushed the vision telling her this from her mind so I would not expect it. If she was going to play that game, then she would have to pay for the consequences.

"Alice?" I said in a relatively calm manner, still luckily held in place my Emmett's hands on my shoulders from when I fell. "You know i'm going to kill you don't you?"

She smiled and shook her head, her reply sounding as optimistic as usual despite my obvious anger with her. "I love you too, Edward." She then turned to Emmett and pointed out his grip holding me in place before skipping over to where Jasper sat and seated herself on his lap, the smile still shining in all its entirety. "She's with Jacob."

If I had been in more control of my emotions at that point I probably would have done either one of two things; one, follow Bella out of the window and wherever they may be and kill him or two, murder Alice for letting her go before taking off after Bella and killing the dog. Either way I was going to get him out of the picture, and this time I wasn't going to be kind and leave him with just a little bite on his shoulder. However as it was Jasper seemed to be sharing the same grin that Alice was and I instantly knew he was unleashing his 'happy' vibe on me, and as such I didn't feel the necessary rage in order to murder anyone at the current time. So instead I turned to Carlisle and Esme who had remained silent all this time, their parental concern obvious in their posture but not in their serene expressions.

"I have to go after her."

"Do whatever you have to do Edward, but remember her feelings before you do something," Esme spoke lovingly, making me truly appreciate for her unconditional endearment. "We won't be far away if you need us."

"Nothing comes without sacrifice, Edward," Carlisle added, his arm extending around Esme's shoulders showing the unbreakable bond that they shared, the same as I shared with Bella. I nodded in reply and just as I reached the window to jump out of Alice piped up again, jumping from Jasper's lap as if she just suddenly remembered something.

"Jasper can go with you," she said, momentarily pausing my exit.

"I'm going alone, Alice."

"If Edward wants to go alone-" Jasper began, his expression displaying his apology for Alice's pushy nature, a frown forming on her lips because of his disapproval.

"Jasper will go with you," she corrected, stepping onto the balls of her feet in order to whisper something in his ear before looking at me and smiling once again.

"Fine. Come on Jasper," I gave in, knowing that there was no way to disagree with her if she truly willed it to happen. Even if she hadn't seen the outcome already she would get her own way anyway- that could be classified as one of her gifts as well.

"Sorry Edward," Jasper murmured as we landed together at the side of the hospital, his expression apologetic as he fell silent, all his effort spent on trying to keep up with me as I weaved in between the forest. I was somewhat glad Alice had pushed Jasper on me- with his ability active around me the murderous intent I had ebbing away with each second that passed. Jasper slowly fell behind as I upped my pace, the anger he had dutifully been keeping back once again taking hold as a familiar voice rang out from the clearing just ahead.

"Stop! Let me help!"

I took refuge in a tree overlooking the small clearing as my ears filled once again with my angel's voice, but the scene that I watched after was far from as comforting as Jasper joined me.

"Jake, stop moving!"

The shaggy haired male turned to look at her with a mild concern in his eyes, his thoughts going laced with worry as she continued to dance around him. "Bella, you should still be in hospital-" I felt a surge of tranquility rush in to battle the ever growing anger as Jasper calmly laid a hand on my shoulder, his gifts soon quelling the need for me to jump down from the branch and massacre the man. "I'm fine, I heal faster than normal people, remember?"

He broke into a jolly laugh that soon changed into a coughing fit, his hand instantly reaching for his chest as a pain glazed over his eyes. I deemed the culprit to be that one of his broken ribs must have punctured a lung from the sight, the many years of free study while not teaching me enough to match Carlisle's extensive knowledge helping at this time.

"You don't heal that fast Jake, I mean look at you! You haven't even seen Carlisle have you?" She fretted, her hand soon replacing the one he held on his chest, her mouth curving into a tiny frown as she listened to a melody she would never be able to play again. "I wish you weren't so stubborn Jake, you really should see someone. I bet if I asked Carlisle to-"

"No Bella, there's no need," he interrupted with an expression I couldn't describe- his eyes drifting to the very tree I was hiding within.

'Is there Edward?'

I cursed lightly under my breath as his thoughts echoed within my head, my gaze lingering upon Jasper as I debated what to do next. It was clear that our appearance wasn't as secret as I originally thought- it seems that while we had managed to stay hidden from Bella it wasn't enough to escape Jacob and his animal senses. I swung my legs over the branch and landed softly upon the ground with Jasper following soon behind, the minute noise we made as our feet made contact with the earth drawing Bella's attention to us. It was times like this that made me wish that Bella was still human; sneaking around required much less effort.

"Edward?" Her question lingered in the silence unanswered, her eyes flickering between me and Jasper. I watched as her mouth pulled back into an expression that wasn't the usual happiness that she greeted me with, her normal smile replaced with a frown as she spoke again. "Why are you here?"

"I was worried Bell-"

"So you thought Jake might hurt me?" Bella interrupted, her face contorting in anger. She turned away from me after a few moments of silent glaring but I could still see a faint tremor sweep across her shoulders. Was she hurt by what I said?

"Bella, I didn't mean anything by it," I reasoned, my hand tracing random patterns down the contours of her back as I kissed her neck lightly to a quiet gasp. Bella rested her hand on my cheek in reply and with that I thought I had been forgiven- how wrong I was. She maneuvered herself in my arms and cupped her face lightly in her hands, speaking in an octave that would confirm our secrecy from the werewolf and other vampire present. As she finished speaking and stepped away I couldn't help but stand shocked at her words, my eyes gazing numbly at the sad smile fixed upon her face.

"Look after Jake for me," she said in a louder tone, her eyes briefly flickering to Jasper and Jacob before settling once again on mine.

"I love you," I whispered, my eyes yearning to fill with tears that could never fall.

"I know," she replied, the sad smile lifting slightly at my statement. Her eyes glazed over with a watery film that I sorely wished I could mimic, my frozen expression reflected back to me from the rippling surface. She waited for a few minutes more in the silence before turning and disappearing into the forest, her image quickly disappearing from sight as she ran.

"Edward? Where is Bella going?" Alice asked as she burst through the trees a few seconds later after Bella disappeared, the rest of my family lining up beside Jasper who had since taken refuge under the tree, not within it. The fact that she asked me surprised me from my numbed mindset, especially since she was probably no where near Jacob when Bella decided to leave.

"Bella... Bella is just going to visit some friends," I mumbled, the words having a hard time forcing their way past the lump in my throat Bella had caused. Everybody's thoughts instantly zeroed on me from their previously different directions, with Alice's jumbled thoughts sounding the most distressing out of the ones I could decipher.

'What did you do Edward?!'
'Bella just left without telling me...'
'Why would she do that to me?'
'I thought being a vampire was all she wanted...'
'Why can I not see her!!'

There was however one more thought that stood out along with the flusters of Alice, which was those of Jasper currently curling his arms around her in a bid to calm her down. He knew instantly from his innate ability to read emotions that our leaving was not as simple as it appeared, but as I flickered my eyes to meet his all I saw was pure confusion; he didn't know what to make of what he felt.

'We'll talk when we're alone.'

I shot him a grateful look for not deciding to voice his thoughts aloud when Alice wasn't looking, my eyes trailing to the ground as I spoke next. "Jasper, would you care to go hunting with me?"

All of my family at that point- excluding Jasper who knew what I was thinking- looked at me with equally curious expressions as they tried to guess at why I would ask such a request. They knew I was fine to go hunting on my own and that ever since Bella was turned into a vampire I rarely chose my partners, usually my family just took turns filling the position. Out of all of them it was Esme in which the majority of curiosity changed into concern, her maternal instincts driving her instantly to my side where she took the human motion of placing her hand on my forehead as if I might have a temperature. Not that vampires ever got ill anyway.

"Edward are you not feeling well? Perhaps you should get Carlisle to take a look at you," she fretted as she peered closely at my eyes. I groaned and cast a warning gaze at Carlisle not to come over before replying.

"Esme i'm fine. I just feel like hunting with Jasper. Jaz?" He smiled at Alice as he took his arms away to stand dutifully by my side, his expression unchanged as she glared coldly at him, especially when she didn't know what was happening. It wasn't like she was going to have to wait long to know in any case since Jasper was probably going to tell her all about it when he got back anyway, that is if Alice didn't find a way to kick Jacob to Antarctica first to see it herself.

"Be back soon."

I left them to deal with Jacob as we travelled in a northerly direction, stopping around 500 miles short of the Canadian border on a small island in Cascade Locks (A/N I got this from google, so I may be wrong as I live in England.) Jasper turned to me with an inquiring expression since we had spent the entire journey, his patience still allowing him to give me time to speak first. I fixated my gaze upon a leaf that fell onto my palm as I spoke, not wanting to see his reactions to my questions.

"What did you think?"

"Well, for one I know that Bella isn't going to see friends," Jasper said slowly, his own eyes soon drifting to the leaf in my hand as if he were as captivated by it as I pretended to be. "No one who would be seeing friends would feel like that. It was... I don't know. It was almost as if she felt it was evil to separate herself from you, but it wasn't like all the times she had to do it before. She felt as if she was hollow inside- when she spoke to you if I couldn't see her I wouldn't be able to determine there was someone there. She didn't emit any emotion whatsoever. I..."

I looked up at him as he trailed off, his eyes shutting as his arms wrapped around himself as if he had suddenly caught a chill. "It was horrible. I don't think she expected to see you again."

"Don't...think...?" I echoed, my voice failing on me as I repeated his words.

Bella didn't think she was going to see me again?
Where did she go?
Why did she go?

I could see Jasper clawing at his arms as my mind ran frantic, his chest heaving heavily as a result of my sudden emotional drop. Now that I thought of it, it was probably selfish of me to bring Jasper with me at all, especially when I already had predicted how I would react since I already knew from his mind I wouldn't like what I would hear. "Jasper... you should go."

At least then he wouldn't be around an emotional black hole anymore.

Without any lingering strength in my body I sank slowly to my knees until they hit the cold earth underneath me, my eyes trailing randomly about the ground not knowing what to focus upon. Despite my dismissal Jasper came and sat down beside me, his ability on full reign as he tried to calm the looming depression that threatened to take me in.

"You have to remain strong Edward. What would Bella think if she saw you like this?" Jasper said, his unique gift managing to work its way through my stubborn shield and drawing my attention to him. "Didn't you promise Bella that you wouldn't let a repeat of last time happen? You never saw what that did to Alice- can you think of what this might do to her? You know I can't let anything hurt her like that again, if I have to drag you to Bella myself to snap you out of this then I will."

"Me...to...Bella?" I asked, a confusion seeping into my tone at his words. "But she told me-"

"Does it matter, Edward? She went after you last time, so this time it is your time to go after her," he replied, stating it in such a way it was as if I should have known in the first place. He stood up after finishing and offered his hand down for me to take, pulling what mostly must have been dead weight to my feet. "You know cannot leave without saying goodbye to everyone however."

"I know," I murmured, offering a small smile to Jasper in gratitude as I had so many times in this one day alone. I couldn't stop my attention from drifting off into the trees as I vainly wished I could just go after her now, my heart yearning for me to just leave everything behind and leap headfirst into a blind chase created by my angel. But he was right. I couldn't leave everyone just like that without saying anything... especially not Esme...

"Go."

"What?" I turned back to him, my attention momentarily diverted back to Jasper.

"Go. I'll tell them- that is if Alice hasn't told them all yet," Jasper chuckled, his expression relaxing slightly from the stoic slate he had been adopting since my obviously distressing turmoil. I placed my hand on his shoulder and gave it a light shake before murmuring a quick thanks and sprinting back into the forest surrounding us, the trees flashing by causing me to remember the first time I ran Bella through Forks.

"No matter what you say, I will find you, Bella. I have an eternity at my disposal to look."


A/N: I'll probably write a preface to this story over the next few chapters, I just need to decide what i'm actually going to write in it, lol.