Claudia the Matchmaker
I sat next to Stacey on the bus, watching Alan Gray chase it down the street. The driver finally stopped. I caught Alan take a sniff of his breath, and then pop in a Mentos. He was really sweaty, and possibly smelly. Then I caught him spray on a cologne sample before the driver finally opened the door. Shelley was sitting by herself looking out the opposite window, so Alan wouldn't catch her staring at him. Shelley has a major crush on Alan, and he likes her too, but God knows neither one will ever tell the other.
Alan saw Shelley by herself, and plopped next to her. I had to admit, he did smell nice. Shelley noticed too. "Hi," was all she could manage. Alan looked down at his sweaty shirt, and whipped it off. I mean literally, he just took his shirt off and shoved it in his backpack.
He had an undershirt on underneath. It was pretty hot for the past month, so guys have been wearing those to school lately. Girls have been dressing kind of skimpy. For example, Shelley was wearing a tank top and short shorts. I was wearing an extremely short burgandy skirt, and a white belly shirt, like in a Britney Spears music video. I think that it was so hot, most girls, including myself decided to risk going braless. I could tell Alan noticed Shelley, as he was trying to keep his eyes off her chest. Shelley's boobs are huge.
Then he looked up at her face, and he had the same goofy look from two days ago. Shelley just started smiling, and Alan smiled back. Then the bus pulled up at our school. As we all got off the bus, Alan wandered over to the guys, but not before waving to Shelley. Shelley waved back.
We all walked to homeroom early, except for Shelley, who decided to hang out with the boys.
When we got to class, we were by ourselves in class. "OK," I said. "Love Bus worked!" We all cheered. "OK, what's next," Mary Anne said. "Well," I said. "Kristy, the guys are playing touch football today, right?" Kristy nodded. "Well, won't they need a water boy? Or girl, as the case may be." "I catch your drift," Stacey said. "We just need to get Alan on the bench." "That'll be easy," Kristy said. "All the guys 'play horribly' when a girl they like is the water girl." "So, we'll let her know about the game when she gets here," Stacey said. We all did the secret plan's signal which was mimicking a heartbeat with our hands. Shelley came in first. "Hey, Shelley," I said. "Did you hear that the guys are playing football after school?" "Really," she said. "Sounds cool. Why are you telling me?" "Because," I said. "I think they need a water girl." Shelley smiled, and then said, "I know. They already asked me. I said yeah." "Cool." Shelley sat in her seat, playing with her hair as she goggled at Alan.
Alan turned around, so Shelley turned around towards Kristy, and nudged her. They both laughed casually. Alan walked over. "Hi, Shelley." "Hi." "So, um, see you at the game." "Cool." They smiled at each other, and Alan sat down. I watched Alan run his fingers through his hair in a way that made Shelley almost scream like she was at a Smashing Pumpkins concert.
Then the bell rang. Alan actually walked with Shelley to their next class. Then again, it seemed too innocent. Later, at the game, Shelley was just sitting on the sidelines, as shy as usual. We all staked out a listening spot in the bushes. Of course, Alan was playing his worst. He moved to the bench next to Shelley, looking way too happy. Shelley offered Alan some water, and he drank. Then, Shelley just smiled. Alan smiled too. "It's too bad you got killed," Shelley said. "You were doing so well." Alan blushed. "I wasn't that good." Shelley nudged him. "You weren't a Favre, but you at least started like McNabb." Alan smirked. "So," Alan said. "It's so cool that you moved back. I mean, we were like best friends for four years." "Yeah," Shelley said. "You've really changed." "What do you mean," Alan said nervously. "Well," Shelley said. "You've really grown. You're, all, you know, taller than me, and stronger. Although I could probably still beat you at leg wrestling," Shelley said, giggling. "Wanna bet," Alan said, grabbing her in a leg lock. We poked our heads out, to watch Shelley squirm and squeal as she pulled her leg out, and wrapped it around Alan's legs. They laughed, and I watched happily as the sparks flew. Then, the game ended. Shelley won the leg wrestling match. "But don't worry, Alan. You get a consolation prize." Alan smiled and said, "What?" Shelley kissed him on the cheek. It took all my might not to squeal.
We watched as Shelley got up and said, "See ya tomorrow." Alan left with Pete Black and Logan Bruno. Logan glared at Shelley, but I don't think he had any reason to. The next day, we went to school via foot instead of bus, but we did see Alan and Shelley get off together. I thought my plan was working. But then, instead of walking to Homeroom together, they just waved. Then, Shelley walked towards us. "So, you guys," Shelley said. "Where do the Pikes live?" Then the Sweet Valley Middle School bus pulled up. I forgot to mention, because Francine Pascal and Ann M. Martin drank a little too much cider at the YA Lit Christmas Party, they wrote this series, which was supposed to be announce what was going on in Kristy's book, Kristy. It's the sick bastard love child of Sweet Valley Twins and the Baby-Sitters Club. I just hope that R.L. Stine doesn't attend the YA Lit New Years' Yves Party next month. Oops, I wasn't supposed to let on to the fact that I know about the author's real lives, was I? Just forget I said that. Just then, two other girls walked off the bus that looked just like Shelley with blonde hair. They were twins. OMG, what this is like the Parent Trap, but with triplets. Like, there were these triplets, but one of the parents took two, and died their hair, and the other took one. One of them walked up to us. "I'm Elizabeth Wakefield," she said, studying Shelley. "Is your name Margo?" "No," Shelley said, confused. "My name's Shelley." "Oh," Elizabeth said. "Good." The other twin walked over. "Don't worry, Liz. We don't have to worry about Margo until high school." The twins exchanged glances quickly. They seemed pretty weird. "So, anyway," Elizabeth said. "This is Jessica."
"Hi," Jessica said, smiling oddly. She looked at Stacey and smirked some more. Then, she waved to some girl across the lawn. "Lila," she shouted. "Over here." Lila walked over, and looked at Jessica, and tilted her head slightly towards Jessica. Jessica nodded and cocked her head in Stacey's direction. Lila frowned. They whispered and then said, "We have to go." Lila and Jessica walked away together, smirking. Later at lunch, we watched as Jessica and Lila approached Stacey. Elizabeth was already sitting at our table. She wasn't really that weird, and she was really nice. A lot of her friends pulled up chairs. Their names were Todd, Winston, Amy, Enid, and Ken. Stacey smiled at them, and said, "They are so obsessed with me. I wonder why they keep staring at me." Then, Lila came up and said, "You guys, wanna go to the newly installed school swimming pool?" We all nodded and followed Lila to the pool. When we got there, she walked over to Stacey and walked her to the edge of the pool. Then Jessica sprang out of nowhere, and shoved her in the pool. Stacey swam up, and started coughing and sputtering up water. "Jessica," she said between sputters. "Are you insane?" Jessica smirked. "You'll see," Jessica said. "You'll see."
Is Stacey about to meet her match? Is Jessica insane? Why the hell would a school transfer its students across the country? Find out in #3, Stacey's Problem
Look out for the Baby-Sitters' Friends Super Special #1, October!
