Title: Nightmares
Disclaimer: I don't own the Avengers; they belong to Marvel of course… I will say, I quoted some scenes from the Avengers in this story; they are not mine. They belong to Marvel/Disney and are the brilliant creations of Joss Whedon and the other writers etc. Just used them to illustrate some things going on with the story.
Author's Note: I am having a really hard time with this … I wanted to get further along in this chapter… OC will probably be introduced in the next chapter… Maybe I will give you a hint towards the end of the story? ;]
I would love it so much if you guys could leave any reviews or +/- feedback… I am trying to write this to be kind of like a movie or show, switching between characters/locations. What do you think so far?
Loki now inhabited the area of Stark Tower created to emulate his California Lab. He was enclosed in a glass chamber with a cot, a couch and magazines from Shield. He was lying on his cot, hands behind his head staring off into space. He couldn't seem to relax, and being caged up made it ten times worse. His only sense of satisfaction came when the mortals removed the muzzle that his idiot of a brother had placed over his mouth.
Loki felt like his body was shaking. His muscles were so tense he was sure they would snap at any moment. He just hoped the humans could not read his mind or sense his anxiety. For the entire evening, Captain America had been in and out of the cell, keeping an eye on him. It made his blood boil. It seemed as though he visited Loki every fifteen minutes, all to check on him. Loki rolled his eyes and sighed heavily. His fourth check-in was coming up within the next few minutes. The Captain's clockwork habits were quite annoying.
Captain America sat in Stark's lab, unable to concentrate. The events of the past few days were too much to handle. He was so upset, but was unable to express his feelings. Not only was he as Loki had said a "man out of time", but he was also a man alone. He knew taking his frustrations out on punching bags was growing costly, especially to his knuckles. He was so lost in thought that he did not hear the elevator doors opening or the footsteps coming up behind him.
"Where is Tony?" A voice from behind asked, worry and concern evident in its inflection.
Captain America almost fell off his chair. He jumped up and spun around to see a beautiful woman standing before him. "He is –" Captain America began, losing his breath momentarily. "Hi- I'm Steve," he said sheepishly sticking out his hand.
"Pepper," she replied, shaking his hand. "Where is Tony?"
"He is helping clean up the city, Ms. Potts," Jarvis answered.
"Is he-" Pepper began.
"He's fine, he gave us quite a scare though," Cap said placing an arm comfortingly on Pepper's shoulder.
"Yeah, he's known for that," She said finally able to relax.
"How long have you been here?" She asked sitting down next to him on the couch.
"It's been a few hours I guess… Kind of lost track of time."
"Have you eaten anything yet?" Pepper asked, also standing up.
"Not since earlier," Steve admitted, rubbing his stomach. "I've been on babysitting duty… Loki's down in the lab… Shield is holding him here."
"Can I make you anything?" Pepper asked. "I cook all the meals for Mr.- Tony…" she explained as she pulled her hair into a ponytail.
"Oh anything is fine," Cap explained. "I don't want to put you out. I do have to check on Loki though, the Shield agents will be switching shifts soon."
"Has Loki eaten?" She asked awkwardly, not knowing how super villains prefer their food.
"We tried to get him to eat earlier but he refused. You're welcome to try…" Steve said.
Pepper retreated down to the kitchen area to see what kind of food Tony had. While parts of Stark tower had been severely damaged, the kitchen remained intact. She opened the fridge slowly, praying that Tony had actually bought groceries prior to the attack.
It is kind of late, but … kind of early, at the same time… She thought to herself as she rummaged through the fridge. At first it appeared that the fridge was almost empty, but tucked in a back drawer she was able to find enough eggs, bacon, and fresh bread to make breakfast for everyone.
"Your captain is late," Loki scoffed.
"I didn't realize there was a schedule," Captain America replied entering the room as if on cue. "But I'm glad you missed me."
"Umm not exactly,"
Captain America rolled his eyes slightly at Loki's response. He turned his attention to the Shield agent standing nearby. "You can take a break now." He said and waved to the guard.
The guard silently left the room, leaving Loki and the Captain to their thoughts.
"You know, I easily could have won the battle if not for that monster," he said fiercely.
"I'm sure," Captain said nonchalantly.
"Who are you kidding?" Tony sassed as he entered the room.
"Mr. Stark," Captain began, turning to face the other man. "Pepper was looking for you. I think she's making food up in the kitchen…"
"Good to know, you heading up there?" Tony motioned towards the door.
"The guard's on break," Cap replied warily.
"No, new guards just started," Tony explained.
As if on cue, two shield agents entered the room, ready to begin their day shift.
The two men gave the shield agents a nod and left the room leaving Loki behind.
"So what kind of food is Pepper making? She better not have used up the stuff in the fridge," He said, more to himself than to Steve.
"I'm not sure… I told her I didn't care…"
The elevator doors opened to the kitchen and Stark walked in to see Pepper preparing a full-scale breakfast.
"I made us breakfast," she began. "There was barely any food in your kitchen, but I found eggs, bread, potatoes and ba-"
"You made the bacon?' Tony almost screamed. Both Pepper and Captain were taken aback by his outburst.
"Damn it… I- I was saving that bacon!" he almost screamed, slamming a fist onto the table.
"For what Tony, You're the one who never buys any food… Don't blame me. I made enough for everyone, and it's almost ready.
"Well, I can't stay… I came back to get Cap… Bruce needs ya' out there on the front lines." Stark explained.
"I'll take the food to go then, ma'am," Captain said politely. "Just let me get my shield and we'll be on our –"
"Here ya' go." Pepper said politely and handed Steve three to-go containers. "One for you, Tony, and Bruce."
"Thanks," Cap replied with a smile, blushing slightly as he took the boxes.
Tony smiled at Pepper and stroked her arm softly before leaving the room. He hated leaving her behind, but there was a lot to do out in the city.
Punch. – A fist made contact with Loki's face. The force of the blow stung his already raw cheek.
Kick. – A boot hit him in the ribs, knocking the wind out of him, leaving him unable to move.
Two shield agents began the beating; Loki was getting the crap kicked out of him by two mortals. One assailant grabbed him by the throat and threw him up against the wall. His body landed with a dull thud. Loki could barely breathe. He had merely made a comment stating his feelings about the intelligence level of Nick Fury and found himself on the receiving end of an attack.
While he tried to roll out of the way, the restraints around his legs made escaping almost impossible. Shield agents had managed to render him helpless. He felt disgusting and weak. The blows kept coming.
He eventually rolled onto his side, pulling himself into the fetal position to escape the punches that were coming at him.
"That'll teach you." One of the guards exclaimed, spitting in Loki's direction. "It will teach you to kneel."
Loki coughed, spitting up blood, and tried to steady himself on his hands and knees.
"What's going on here?" A voice came from the door of the cell. A horrified Pepper stood in the doorway with a tray of food.
"He was trying to escape," the one guard said, dumbfounded at the sight of Pepper.
Loki laughed softly at the stupid look on the guard's face. This woman had truly caught him off guard. "So you must be the infamous Pepper Pots." He said spitting out another mouthful of blood.
"I am." Pepper replied coolly, placing the tray down on Loki's cot.
From the tray she had brought to Loki's cell, she took a napkin and dipped it in the glass of water meant for Loki. She used it to dab at the blood oozing from a fresh wound on the side of his face.
"I can do that myself!" he snapped, ripping the towel from Pepper's hand. "The last thing I need is you mortals trying to cure me."
Pepper looked down at him and wasn't sure what to do. It felt wrong to leave him there to get his clock cleaned, but she wasn't about to let him walk freely.
"I brought food," she explained, motioning towards the tray. "You should eat…"
She turned to the other agents, turning her back on Loki. "There is more food upstairs if you're hungry," she began. "I ca-" the guards cut her off.
"I cannot leave you alone with him," the man began. "But the food does look good…."
"Jarvis will alert you if something happens," Pepper explained as she ushered the guard out of the room. "It's in the kitchen on the 2nd floor. Jarvis will direct you."
Loki watched as Pepper sweet-talked the guard. He couldn't help but notice her willing-ness to help him. He had just tried to take over the world and she was actually being nice to him. He felt this would be a good opportunity to find a way out of the cell. If he were nice enough, perhaps she would let him out.
"Now back to you," she began, eying Loki suspiciously. "I have a feeling you're probably pretty hungry…. You should probably eat something," she said as she pushed the tray over to Loki. He had finally managed to clean himself up.
Loki stared blankly at the food placed in front of him. He knew that Pepper had made him bacon and eggs, but he didn't trust it. "I'm not hungry," he replied, his words short and with feeling. At that moment his stomach growled, making it apparent to Pepper that he was lying.
"Mmmhmm," she replied, a smile forming on her lips. "Well, if you're not going to eat, then I will," she exclaimed as she ate a piece of bacon f rom Loki's plate.
After watching her eat the bacon and live, Loki took a piece. He bit down on it and began to chew. He hadn't realized how hungry he was. Now that he thought about it, it had been at least four or five days since he had last eaten. His stomach growled again, reaffirming his decision to eat. Within a few minutes he had cleared off the plate and drank the remaining water. He put the tray back onto the floor.
"It's all a lie," he mumbled absently.
"What's a lie?" Pepper asked, taking a seat on the floor.
"Everything," Loki snickered, a smile forming across his thin lips.
"You lie, they lie, I lie... everyone lies. It's the nature of humanity, one big lie. You all think you're so much better than me... but you're not, and deep down you know it." Loki sneered.
"It's not about knowing you are better or worse than anyone else," Pepper began, becoming lost in thought.
Something about Loki's statement struck a nerve with her. She remembered the lies that had caused Tony to become Iron Man, as well as the lies that had caused Ivan Vankov to attack New York. Lies drove people to do crazy things... if anyone knew that, she did.
"While I agree that everyone lies, everyone who is lied to does not reek havoc on large cities in attempt to rule the world… People lie with good intentions sometimes," Pepper explained.
"Does anyone ever have good intentions?" Loki asked sarcastically.
As much as he was trying to put up a front, Pepper could see the hurt in his eyes. Before she could say anything he stood up. "I am going to sleep now. Please go." he said and motioned for her to leave.
"As you wish." Pepper said as she left with Loki's dishes.
"Father, what will we do-"
"Silence." Odin exclaimed at Thor's outburst.
"But-" Thor began, but stopped himself, not wanting to disrespect the Alfather.
"You know not what you ask of me," Odin began. "He must be punished."
"His mind father... he is ... he knows not what he is doing."
"I must do something. Loki must be punished." Odin exclaimed.
"How is he?" Frigga asked quietly, making her presence known.
"He is being held on Earth mother,"
Frigga sighed heavily. She missed her son and was worried for his safety. She went over to a mirror kept in the back of their study and used her magic. With it, she could see her son in his prison cell on Earth. From what she saw, it looked as though his sleep was not peaceful.
"He sleeps, but with great discomfort" she said quietly watching Loki's chest rise and fall. She could see an expression of pain on his face and paired with the tossing and turning she feared her son was going through something terrible.
"I will meet with the Asgardian justices tomorrow Thor, Loki's fate will be decided. You will bring him home." Odin looked at Thor and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I am counting on you, the future King of Asgard." he exclaimed.
"Yes father." Thor replied taking a knee in front of Odin. "I will leave at once." He replied after bowing in allegiance to the King.
"No, no. I am not-" Loki jolted awake, sweat dripping from his forehead.
"It was a dream," he consoled himself quietly as he rocked back and forth. His skin felt hot, clothing damp from sweating. He ran a finger through his now wet hair and pressed his back against the cool stonewall behind him. He closed his eyes again, a wave of nausea hitting him.
"I thought you might like this," Pepper said quietly, stepping out of the shadows. Loki looked up, his cheeks blushing slightly at the humiliation of the woman seeing him in this condition. Not wanting to have to talk to her, he stretched back onto the bed and turned away from the woman.
She sat down on the cot next to him and placed a cool cloth on his face. "This will help." She said quietly. "Tony has bad dreams sometimes… "
"I bet he does," Loki mumbled sarcastically, covering his face with the cloth.
As he closed his eyes, his, dream began to come back to him. He remembered falling from the Bifrost, the sound of Thor's cries, and the look on Odin Alfather's face. He opened his eyes, trying desperately to get the image out of his head. He was tired of the nightmares, tired of being forced to remember the events that had caused him to try to conquer the world to become King.
When he let go of Odin's scepter, he figured that he would either die alone between the realms, or be rescued by Thor and Odin. He silently prayed for death as he fell into the abyss. What ended up happening was a fate far worse.
He was found half dead by the Chitauri and taken to their planet. Once there, they began to torture him. Not only was he abused physically, but also mentally. Slowly the Chitauri worked to push him over the edge. They tested his endurance by limiting food, water, and sleep.
When he was able to rest, Loki constantly had nightmares. In every dream the creatures twisted his memories, making it impossible for him to tell what was real. They fed on his insecurities and turned his feelings of sadness and jealousy to rage. Despite being away from the Chitauri, the nightmares had not stopped. If anything they had gotten worse. He constantly had vivid dreams, reliving the torture he experienced by the Chitauri, or worse dreams about being tortured by his family.
"Loki," Pepper was now standing over him, waving her hands in front of his face. He flinched, realizing that she had been trying to talk to him.
"What do you want?" He said snappily as he sat up. "Can't you see I am trying to rest?"
"I just wanted to give you something to help you sleep, maybe help stop the nightmares," Pepper began, opening a box of sleeping pills. "Take two of these, they should help." She said handing him the pills.
Loki eyed her suspiciously. "My whole life is a nightmare…" he said quietly taking the pills. "All I am is another relic." He said quietly lying back onto the bed.
"Your brother seems to care a lot about you, he just returned from Asgard and was asking about you…" Pepper said, trying to reassure him.
"I don't have a brother." Loki said firmly, his eyes slowly becoming heavy as he slipped into sleep.
This time he dreamt of the battle between the Chitauri, himself, and the Avengers. He was reliving a memory.
"Look at this, look around you! You think this madness will end with your rule?" Thor screamed, eyes pleading with Loki.
"It's too late. It's too late to stop it," Loki replied, a conflicted look on his face.
"No, we can, together," Thor said placing his arms supportively onto Loki's shoulders, his eyes wet with tears for his brother.
This conversation was a painful memory for Loki. While he would never admit it, deep down he still had love and admiration for his brother. He despite his frustrations and anger with Odin he still craved his family's affection. He wanted so badly to trust Thor and be able to work with him as his equal. While he longed for this, he knew it would never happen. He had so much frustration and rage building inside of him that he snapped. The Chitauri's psychological torture had taken its toll and at that moment Loki was a lost cause. Thor's words were falling on deaf ears.
"Your sentiment," Loki felt himself hiss at Thor, stabbing him violently. It was if he was having an out of body experience. He watched in internal horror as Thor's facial expression changed. Gone was the compassion and the sincerity that lined the thunder god's face.
Thor grumbled angrily as he lunged at Loki, managing to throw him to the ground. Loki remembered taking one last look at Thor before rolling off of the roof. The real Loki secretly hoped he would fall to his death, but the Chitauri knew better.
Thor stood quietly outside of Loki's cell, watching him sleep. Despite Loki's actions, his brother's well being was still his main concern. Loki's behavior worried him. Loki seemed to be having another nightmare. Loki was tossing and turning in his sleep and at one point he had been crying. Thor remembered when the two were children; Loki would have bad dreams often.
Somehow Thor felt that Loki had always known he was different, so to Thor the news of his parentage should not have been a total shock. He could not understand how Loki could throw away the ties to their family so easily. Thor knew Loki had been through a lot since his fall from the Bifrost and all he wanted was to find out what had made his brother snap. To his knowledge, up until his banishment, Loki had been happy for him, and had been accepting of his role as future King of Asgard. Now all of a sudden it seemed as though Loki had been living a double life.
"Nightmares?" Thor asked Pepper as she entered the room.
"He has been having them on and off all night." Pepper said uneasily. "I'm Pepper, Pepper Potts," She explained. "I am Tony's assistant, is there anything I can get you?" She asked.
"No Potts of Pepper, keeping an eye on my brother was very kind of you. I know not what troubles him so, but I am forever grateful that you were there for him." Thor said, placing a hand on Pepper's shoulder. "I wish to help him. But I cannot…" He said, sadness filling his voice, his eyes tearing up slightly.
"You should talk to him. I will give you two some privacy." She said, retreating upstairs to check on the other Avengers.
Thor went into Loki's cell and sat down on the couch. By now, Loki was shaking. Thor could not make out what he was saying, but he was talking in his sleep. He started to become more agitated, tears filling his eyes. Thor placed his hand gingerly on Loki's shoulder to nudge him awake.
Loki mumbled at first, unaware of whom had woken him.
"Loki? Brother, what troubles you?" Thor asked, placing a supportive hand on Loki's shoulder.
"How many times must I tell you? I am not your brother." Loki replied harshly. He secretly wanted to be held, for Thor to tell him things would be ok, but he knew that Thor could no longer and would no longer protect him.
"Loki, I – I only want to do right by you," Thor began, his eyes pleading. "How have I wronged you? I must know. What caused you to do this? I... I am taking you home today, to see mother and father, and our friends. "
Loki felt as though he would be sick. If he kept his feelings buried inside for much longer he thought he would throw them up. To prevent such he thought of the most hurtful thing he could say to Thor. All he wanted was to be left alone. "I have no friends. And as for mother and father… I have no mother and father. I have lived a lie, and I will do so no longer. Do what you must with me, but I will not call you brother or them family." Loki instantly regretted his reply, but there was no going back now.
"How can you say that?" Thor almost exploded. "Do you not remember all the good times we had growing up? Despite your words, I never meant to cast you in the shadows. I always loved and respected you."
"I have no good memories Thor. But you wouldn't know about that. But someday you will. Someday you will realize what I have gone through. And you will realize why I can not forgive you, Odin, or even Frigga." Loki continued. "Please leave. I will go with you wherever you wish me to go, but as far as any kind of bond you think we share, you are mistaken." Loki rolled away from Thor, fighting the tears that he feared would soon spill.
"Brother …" Thor almost croaked, tears now streaming from his blue eyes. As Loki rolled away from him, he could feel his heart breaking. As if to try one last time to do right by his brother he quietly walked out of the cell.
Loki waited until he could no longer hear Thor's footsteps. Tears fell from his eyes and he cried, harder than he had ever before. He pulled his knees to his chest and slowly fell asleep. He hoped that there would be no more bad dreams.
Fin for now -
SO… in the next chapter I will definitely try to intro the original character… I am in the process of writing. I will be on vacation this week, but I am bringing my laptop, so we'll see what I can get done. =]
And did anyone catch that lovely I am Legend reference? :) haha...
Also at this time I want to give a shout out to my awesome Beta – my best friend Caitlin has been proofing the story for me… so thanks to her! =D
*Note – she hasn't proofed the last part of this story, so if there are errors, my bad!
