Die Liebe ist ein wildes Tier / Love is a Wild Animal

Trigger Warning: Domestic Violence

Bettina grit her teeth and stared down the bull in front of her. The clock behind him read 02:40. The neighbours were going to call the cops. Again. "You're going to wake him," she warned.

"Fuck him!" Anton spat. "Who gives a shit?" He took a drooling swig of his beer before continuing. "After what he did to me? He's lucky I didn't-"

Heat flushed Bettina's cheeks and she cut him off, tone menacing. "Don't. Threaten him."

"How else is he gonna learn? I should have started years ago. Now thanks to you, he's a sensitive bitch."

Bettina's eyes narrowed. "Shut your mouth. He's just a kid, they both are. You know they like to play jokes."

"Jokes?" Anton's voice bordered a hysterical growl. "That was supposed to be funny?"

"To him, I could see how it would be." She tried to repress her smile, remembering Anton's face when he unwittingly set off the clump of cherry bombs that were waiting for him in the bathroom. A sense of pride filled her. Didn't I do the same at his age?

Anton's eyes morphed slowly from frustration to a cold sort of understanding. He spoke in a hushed tone, snark laughter choking his words. "You're getting off on this." He took another drink, slamming the empty bottle down on the table. "You always defend the little shit and now here you are, smiling like I'm fucking stupid." With effort he stood, swaying a little. Taking haphazard steps toward her, his heavy hands curled into fists. The eerie smile that filled his face a moment ago had been wiped away. "Do I look like I'm stupid?"

A cold shiver inched up Bettina's spine. With every step he took, she took one in the opposite direction until her back hit the kitchen wall.

Anton's hulking arm levelled across her neck, pinning her.

Even though she was trapped, she took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. "Look at you. You're a mess. And you ask me this?" Her laughter rang out, dry and cutting.

Anton's free hand slammed into the poorly finished wall behind her.

Bettina blinked and everything was dark around her. She could vaguely make out the familiar shape of a child's bed. Fear laced her. "No." She spoke to the small figure in the dark. "Don't-"

At the same time she was also in the kitchen, Anton's hot beer breath on her face. "That's right. Beg."

Two figures stood on the opposite end of the kitchen. One was Wolfgang. The other, her friend Yrsa.

"Shut him out," Yrsa warned. "You're his mother. You're stronger than him. Shut. Him. Out."

In her son's room, she pulled the blankets up to his chin. His pensive stare was locked on her.

In any other circumstance she could sever the connection between her and her son with ease. Yet regardless of how hard she tried this time, she felt him merge with her. The sensation of cold adrenaline flowed between them, and his anger seeped into every muscle in her body. "Go to sleep," she whispered. She smiled, although she knew it didn't reach her eyes.

A rough hand clamped down on her throat and squeezed.

"Shut him out!" Yrsa commanded.

"I can't!" Bettina snapped, voice pitching under Anton's grip.

Her shaking hand rose to caress the boy's forehead, which was cold with sweat. "I'm okay," she soothed. "Let go. You don't want to feel this."

He shook his head, icy eyes certain far beyond his years and said, "Neither do you."

Die Liebe ist ein wildes Tier / Love is a wild animal
Sie beißt und kratzt und tritt nach mir / It bites and scratches and kicks towards me
Hält mich mit tausend Armen fest / It holds me tightly with a thousand arms
Zerrt mich in ihr Liebesnest / and drags me into its love nest
Frißt mich auf mit Haut und Haar / It devours me completely
und würgt mich wieder aus nach Tag und Jahr / and retches me back out after many years
Läßt sich fallen weich wie Schnee / It drops softly like snow
Erst wird es heiß dann kalt am Ende tut es weh / First it gets hot, then cold, in the end it hurts

- Rammstein, Amour