The Wizard of Ah
Summary: Lucinda Heartphilia, simply called 'Lucy', is a young farm girl who lives in the small back woods town of Magnolia. She's always longed for magic and a life of fame, but how could she when all her stern father wants for her is to continue on the line of 'pig-raising'. When a sudden storm whisks her away into the Land of Fiore, she must find her way back home by traveling with an eccentric group consisting of a hot headed (flammable) straw man, a sexy clad Iron woman, and a (not so) cowardly lion, along with her snarky pet cat, Happy. But the problem with it all is, at the end of the day, will she want to leave?
Chapter I: The Farm Girl
Somewhere over the rainbow, and through the lands of gray, there is a little place called Magnolia. Now, this isn't some blooming town nor is it some busy, bustling city. No, Magnolia was just a little backwards town that consisted of small, backwards people who lived placid backwards lives. Now in this town however, there was a certain backwards girl who dreamed of a life that was not so backwards. Her name was Lucinda, and if you ignored the fact that she wore a dress that was usually covered in slime, and reeked of manure, she could easily be said to be the prettiest girl in Magnolia.
Now, our little story picks up at a point in time where Lucy isn't looking so pretty. She's leaning over a teetering stack of hay and hefting it above her head. She isn't the strongest girl but her father still insists upon working her like an strapping young lad. With her skin covered in hot sweat and her face red, and her long yellow hair pulled in ponytails, one wouldn't think she's the beautiful heroine of this tale. She lifts the hay above her head, and with a huge grunt of effort that pops a vein in her forehead, she heaves it over the rickety fence that holds in the horses. The horses neigh and surround the hay, and Lucy leans against the fence and sighs.
"Look who's being lazy again" snickered a high little vioce "You shouldn't be slacking Lucy. You'll get fat"
Lucy scowl's and throws some dirt at the cat sitting besides her. Happy is what she calls him, and she doesn't know why. He never makes her happy. Lucy is sure that the goal of the small, blue talking cat is to make her as unhappy as possible.
But, that's not too hard nowadays for her. Lucy sits beside Happy on the grass and plucks the grass at her feet. Now that her face is no longer beet-red and the sweat has settled into a cool sheen around her body, her prettiness returns. Her hair isn't actually yellow; it's more of a soft golden color, pronounced more by the sun shining above. And her eyes are wide and brown, like sweet chocolates that have melted.
The horses behind her nay once more, and she wipes her forehead and returns to work, encouraged by Happy's slick comments about getting fat.
If Lucy had it her way, she'd never lift a pretty finger to work ever again. Her father, Jude Heartphilia, was a tough stern man who was always wrapped up in the affairs of Heartphilia Plantation. Lucy understood why he wanted her to work so hard anyway, since, after the death of her mother it was basically up to her to be the lady of the farm. But, as she lifted bale of hay after bale of hay, Lucy couldn't help but let her mind wander once more. Her heart yearned for places far away from her stinky old farm, where she could flirt with who she wanted and do what she wanted. She loved the animals on her farm and enjoyed taking care of them, she honestly did, but somewhere, nestled in the girl's heart, she knew she was destined for places afar.
"Lucy," Happy said, waving his little hands to capture her attention, "Lucy, you've got that look in your eyes again. Are you thinking about boys who you lllliiikkkeee?"
Lucy scowled again, hating being pulled away from her day dreams of the places she'd get to see, and the things she'd get to do
"Don't roll your tongue like that, Happy" she scolded "I told you it's disgusting"
"You llliiikkkeee them" Happy chirped "You lllliiikkeee someone"
Lucy tossed the last bale of hail into the horse pen and said "And who exactly do I like? Father won't let me leave the farm anymore. Not since I graduated from school"
Happy shrugged, not bothered by the fact that he didn't know who exactly Lucy liked. Who happened to be no one, by the way. How could she like anyone, not when she was stuck on the farm with her stupid father and her withered, brittle Aunty Aquarius. She blushed at the thought of any boy coming her way. From the stories Lucy read, men were supposed to be dashing and strong, and reliable. Her prince charming was tall and stoic, and at night, when the sun had settled and all the animals on the farm had stopped bleating and neighing, Lucy would imagine him coming to her and wooing her right off her feet. It was silly and cliché, but it was all she had. She didn't really understand most men, not when the population of magnolia consisted of many females, and the only males happened to be idiots who did nothing and laid around. Lucy didn't think that these guys were good examples.
And besides, she wasn't really looking for a husband. All she wanted was to get away from the farm and her dumb dad, and be her own girl for once. For once, she'd stop being 'Lucky Lucy of Heartphilia Plantation'. All she wanted was freedom.
"Lucinda!" came her father's hollering "Lucinda get in here!"
"Yes dad!" she cried back and stood, wiping the soot and dirt from her dress.
When she arrived at her house, she found her father standing on the porch, his face set in a scowl and his arms crossed. She carried Happy in her arms, and beneath his breath, he muttered
"Oh, oh. Someone looks mad"
She quietly hushed him. Among many things her father didn't like, he didn't like Happy. If Jude found out that Happy could talk, he'd be gone within a second. And Lucy didn't think she could handle losing her best, if not only, friend. Although Happy was annoying and sassy, she couldn't think of life without him. Not when before Happy, she'd had no one to talk to. And that had been lonely.
"Yes dad?"
Jude scowled down at her "Did you feed the horses?"
"Yes"
"And the pigs?"
"Yes"
"And the cows?"
"Yes"
Once all those had been answered, Jude's scowl melted off and he smiled a little. "Good. you're Aunty wants to talk to you."
And with that he was gone. That was all Jude ever really said to Lucy; he'd ask her if she did her chores and then he'd dump her on her Aunty Aquarius. Lucy loved her father, because he was her father and it was mandatory. She couldn't say that he was anything that a father actually should be. He was a great reason why she wanted to leave her bored, platonic life behind. She couldn't remember the first time he told her she loved her, or even a hug. Those had stopped when she had been very very young. Right after her mother had died.
Lucy remembered a lot about her mother. She'd been eight when she'd died. She remembered Heartphilia Plantation before her mother had died. It had actually been fun. Lucy remembered days of laughter and joy, of hugs and kisses, and playful games. She remembered enjoying being with her mother, and listening to stories about the city. Lucy's mother had been born a city gal, and she had been so very beautiful.
Perhaps, that was why her father didn't want to let Lucy go. Her mother had died of a sickness she'd caught in the city, while visiting her relatives. Lucy could only remember having her mother holding her one day and the next having her father telling her that there would be no more days of sunshine and joy, no more days of playing with the kids next door because her mother was dead and Lucy had to be the woman of the farm.
Inside the house that Lucy knew so well, she found her Aunty Aquarius sitting in the same rocking chair she'd sat in since Lucy could first walk. Her Aunty Aquarius wasn't the nicest woman. After her mother had died, she'd stepped in as some sort of placebo mother figure, but she never quite fit the roll. Aunty Aquarius had a way with words that no one else did, and she always had special words to say to Lucy. They weren't very nice, and they were never encouraging. On that day, Aunty Aquarius was rocking furiously in her chair, which was never a good sign. When she cracked open her eyes, her heartened eyes met Lucy
"So you're still living here? When are you going to get a man?"
That was her favorite subject with Lucy. Aunty Aquarius had lost her husband, Uncle Scorpio, before Lucy had even been born. And she never stopped ragging Lucy about finding her a good man like Scorpio, who would provide for her and give her thirty babies and make her a good woman. Today however, since she was in a rotten mood, she was all the harder.
"There are lots of amazing men in this town. Why, young Hibiki down the road is looking for a lady to marry! He's beautiful and you'd be lucky to marry someone like him. Don't go thinking just because you're cute you're going to land you a city guy. No city man in his right mind will want you, not no way, no how!"
Lucy stood there, clutching Happy, and said nothing. She nodded, taking blow after blow, until Aunt Aquarius had tired herself out and had fallen asleep.
"Wow. I know you're fat Lucy, but the old lady was real mean today" whispered Happy. She hushed him silently and went to her room. There wasn't much to do after chores had been done and Aunt Aquarius had dished her daily life ethics on marriage. Lucy sat Happy on her bed, and tucked her hair behind her ear.
"Oh, Happy" she sighed, going to the window and staring at the blue sky "I wish I could fly. I wish I could fly far and fast, away from here! I want to see the city Happy! I want to enjoy things!"
Happy replied "Then why don't you?"
She turned back to him. "Father would never let me."
Happy snickered "Yeah and if you tried to run away he'd see your butt from miles away"
Lucy chucked a stray pillow at him.
She sighed and went to the mirror. Hanging on her old cracked mirror was a picture of her mother. She was smiling and holding a baby Lucy in her arms. She really was beautiful.
Lucy stared at herself in the mirror, at her chocolate eyes and her sun golden hair. The dress she wore, the plain, boring old brown dress the same color as the manure she dug out everyday did nothing for her. How could she, a simple farm girl, have adventures?
She brushed her hair and pulled it in a side ponytail. That was her favorite hairstyle. It was the one her mother used to do for her, when she had been little. She'd whisper a little song in her ear too, while slowly passing the comb through her scalp. And, while Lucy brushed her, and swept it into a side ponytail, she sung the song her mother used to sing
"Somewhere, over the rainbow, cat's can fly.
There's a land that I heard of
in a lullaby."
"Somewhere, over the rainbow,
Words come true
and the magic that you dare to dream
is really true"
"Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up in a land
where magic rules "
"Somewhere over the rainbow,
cat's can fly
cat's fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh, why can't I?"
"Lucy," Happy interrupted her "Lucy, you sound like someone's trying to strangle you."
She scowled at him once more and threw her comb at the cat. He snickered and dodged him
"Be quiet, Happy!"
"And cat's can't fly. I'm a cat, and I can't fly"
"Well, maybe you're just different."
"All the other cat's can't fly"
"Yeah, well all the other cat's can't talk either"
this, for once, shut Happy up. Once Lucy's hair was done, she stripped and put on her favorite outfit. It was the outfit she was allowed to wear indoors. It was just a simple blue miniskirt and a white zip up shirt, but her father absolutely refused to let wear it outside.
She crawled into bed, and curled up, closing her eyes, and sighing, dreaming of lands far away, where she could fly and do magic, and she was free, free like the birds in the sky. Happy curled up next to her, and although he said nothing, just being next to her reassured her.
She was awoken by the sounds of heavy rain slamming against her small house. She sat up groggily and rubbed at her eyes. Happy stirred besides her and mumbled something about 'fish'.
"what's going on?" she whispered, throwing her legs over the side of the bed. The ground beneath them shook, and Lucy found herself doing a faceplant on the floor. She rolled over and stumbled to her feet, stumbling towards her window. Outside, the sky was bleak and gray, and she couldn't see far away. She heard the panicked cries of the farm animals, mixed in with the roar of the rain.
"It's a storm!"
"No, duh"
She ignored Happy and went tripping to the door. Just as her hands wrapped around the knob, the house shook once more. And then she heard it. There was a massive roaring and shuddering, and the temperature in the room dropped ten degrees. She rushed back to the window, just in time to see the sky light up with a massive thunderbolt. And not too far away, she saw a tornado, rushing and hissing, spinning it's violent way straight at Heartphilia Plantation.
"Oh no!" she cried, and this time, Happy's hugged her leg. She bent low and scooped him up "We have to get out of here!"
They sprinted out of the room, and towards the door "Aunty Aquarius!" she shouted "Dad! Aunty Aquarius! Oh where are you?" There was no reply. She stumbled her way out of the house, until she was at the door. Before her, the ground was sodden and wet, slick with mud and soggy grass. Cold wind beat at her, forcing her back in the house. She used her hand to shield both her and her pet, and struggled back to her feet.
Above the howling and spitting of the weather, above the growling and the roaring and the spinning of the wind, Lucy heard her father's shouts "Lucinda! Lucinda! We're in the shed, hurry up! Lucinda!"
"Dad!" she screamed back "Dad!"
She was back at the door, braving against the biting cold wind and the terrible rain. It was now impossible to see and impossible to hear, and she didn't know whether to go this way or that. She was scared, and she held Happy all the tighter. He was quiet in her arms, staring ahead silently; trust the stupid cat to be silent now, when all she really wanted was for him to continue talking, just so that she had something to take her mind off.
"Lucinda!"
"Dad!" she cried back
and then, the tornado was upon them, destroying everything in its path. Dirt, grime, soot, anything it could pick up, it was thrown at Lucy, and she was pushed back. Then, there was the groaning ripping sound, the screeching and aching, and the house itself was being ripped by the tornado. She held onto Happy, paralyzed by the fear running through her. She didn't know what to do, didn't know where to move, and didn't know what to think. In that moment, all she really could think about was her mother, and the strange weightless feeling that she had had when she knew that she was dead. That was how she somewhat felt right then. Like she weighed nothing, despite all the times Happy had called her fat. And then, she wasn't weightless anymore. She was spinning so rapidly, spiraling into places unknown. She squeezed her eyes and shut and hoped that above anything else, it would end, that it would all be over, and she would be safe.
At last, with one final thud, the spinning stopped. It took a moment for Lucy to collect her thoughts and even longer to stand up. Happy wriggled from her grasp and landed on the floor
"Ow!" he said, stretching "You almost choked me Lucy!"
"I'm sorry!" she said "I couldn't help it. It was too scary"
Happy gave her a skeptical glare, and hurried to the door "Come on, let's hurry to the shed!"
"Y-yeah" she said, and threw the door open.
She gasped.
Before her, the regular town of Magnolia, the sight of Heartphilia Plantation that usually greeted was gone. Instead, there was a road, a road of yellow brick that stretched farther than the eye could see. And surrounding the road, there were flowers, flowers of impossible colors that Lucy had never seen. The sky above them was impossibly bright, a different hue of blue that Lucy didn't could exist. There were tree's too, trees that were greener and shinier than the one's back at home. Everything, everything, about this new, strange, glorious place was brighter and happier. Mouth agape, Lucy took her first shaky step outside
"Oh, Happy" she gasped "Happy, I don't think we're in Magnolia anymore"
Happy hopped off after her. She took her first step on the yellow paved road and realized that she had no shoes on.
"Look!" Happy shouted, pointing off to the left. Lucy followed Happy's fingers, and then she gasped. Two ruby red slippers were poking out from beneath the house.
"Oh no," she moaned
"Oh no" echoed Happy. He looked up at her, and then, said slowly "Oh no Lucy, I think you're butt squished some poor lady"
