A/N: So this is the second chapter of my LeahxJasper story. I hope you enjoy it :)
Disclaimer: I do not own twilight or these characters. I just write what my imagination creates
Leah's POV
As I sit here with my head in my hands, I begin to regret agreeing to be in this stupid wedding. When I first heard that Sam and Emily had finally set a date for the wedding I was shocked. It's not like I wasn't expecting it, it's just that for the longest time I had hoped that Sam would come back to me. I had this notion in my mind that they hadn't set a date because Sam was second guessing his relationship with Emily. I never really believed the stories about imprinting; so it wasn't hard in convincing me that imprinting wasn't real and I would be with the one I love again. Well that was stupid. Nice going Leah. I curse myself for hoping. I think back to the time I agreed to be the maid of honor.
A few days after the wedding date announcement I was sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast when she walked in.
"Leah?" She said her voice wary.
"What are you doing here?" I said not bothering to look up from my plate.
"Your mom invited me over. She wants to help me plan the wedding."
I stiffened. "Okay so if you're here for my mom then why are you here talking to me? You should be talking to her."
She walked over to the table and sat in the chair across from me. "Well I have something I want to ask you."
I looked up at her. "What?"
"Would you like to be my maid of honor?"
I just looked at her. Would I like? Why the hell would I like to be the maid of honor in her wedding with Sam?
As if reading my mind she shook her head slightly and said "I mean would you please be my maid of honor?"
I looked around the kitchen avoiding her pleading eyes. I knew that she really wanted me to be the maid of honor. We always talked about it when we were younger; we promised that we would be each others maid of honor. My silence must've made her nervous because she started talking again. "I know that you're hurt and being in my wedding is the last thing you want to do but I really miss you. I want us to be friends again. Being cousins has no meaning if we don't talk.
I sighed. I missed Emily too. It sucked not having a girl to talk to and I was tired of always feeling depressed over her relationship with Sam. I looked back at Emily and nodded. "Okay. I'll do it."
I thought that being in her wedding would help me move on. Like it would give me some type of weird closer that would allow me the chance I needed to rebuild my friendship with Emily. In the end I was wrong, Surprise surprise. Being here at this wedding did nothing but make me feel more unloved and depressed than ever. It's not just because of whose wedding this was but also because everywhere I look I see happy smiling faces. Happy couples, hugging, kissing, dancing and having the time of their life. I feel alone, like I don't belong here.
I sit on a log near a clearing in the woods. I've walked far enough that I ca't hear anyone at all anymore. I needed to get away to think and process what happened just a few short hours ago. I also left because I didn't want anyone to see me as I am, I didn't want to ruin the happy times of the wedding guests. I sigh. what can I do now? At the moment I can't think of anything. My mind is a big blank, I feel like a damn zombie. I start to pick at the flowers in my hair. I don't have anything else to do; and yet even if I did I'd still probably rather be here. Here sitting on this log, messing up at my hair and staring up at the sky. why? Because no one is bothering me. No ones is in my face telling me to smile. I don't have people lecturing me about how mean I am, about how I should just forget Sam and forgive Emily. No one is around who expects me to be happy. I can just be me. Or at least the depressed, lonely version of me.
I hear the crunching of leaves somewhere close, someone is coming. I sniff the air. It's one of the Cullens. I stand up as a he descends from the trees. It's the blond male one, the one who can feel what others are feeling. What's his name? oh yeah Jasper. I cross my arms and frown at him. Why is he here? He's interrupting my sulking. He stops in the middle of the field. "Why the hell are you here?" I yell
"I wanted to see if you were okay." he says in an low voice. Normal people wouldn't have heard him.
"I'm fine."
"Your red puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks say otherwise." I don't reply and he takes a few steps towards me. "Do you wish to talk about what is upsetting you?"
"No."
He stops a couple feet away from me. "If you do not wish to talk then may I sit here with you, in case you have a change of heart?" I think for a second. Do I really want him here? Not really. Do I mind if he's here? No. I shrug then walk over to the middle of the field and sit down. I look over at Jasper, he looks a little confused.
"Flowers." I say then pick a small one out of the grass and hold it up. He gives a slight nod of his head and walks back over to me then sits down next to me.
Jasper's POV
We're just sitting here in the grass. All is quiet except for the ruffling of the leaves when the wind blows. We're not talking and she isn't even looking at me; Yet I couldn't be more content. I am still surprised she let me be near her. when I decided to follow her I only planned on keeping my distance and just watch her like I had been. I didn't plan on showing myself to her, but as I continued to feel the mixture of emotions that she was feeling I couldn't not go and try to console her. I wanted more than anything to comfort her. I wasn't sure how I would go about it or how she would react; I just had to go to her. So I did. When I first appeared before her, her mood shifted from one of great depression to annoyed then indifference. Now She is relaxed. Her head is titled up towards the sky and her eyes are closed. The wind blows and ruffles her hair. She smiles, I smile. I'd hate to see that smile disappear, but there is something I must ask her.
"Leah?" I say in a whispered voice.
She stiffens for a moment then relaxes again. "Yeah?" She says.
"Why were you so dejected earlier?"
she looks at me confused. "Huh?"
I give a soft chuckle. "Why were you so depressed earlier?" I know that this question will upset her but if I truly want to help her or have any chance at making her happy, I have to know the answer.
She looks down and starts picking up pieces of grass from the ground. "Because the man I love got married to my best friend."
"That is the obvious answer, everyone knows the wedding upset you to some degree. Even if you tried to hide it. I am asking you more specifically about why you were unhappy. what are the reasons for your sorrow?." She looks back down at the ground. "I know you are aware that I feel what others are feeling and what you were feeling no more than an hour ago was immense heartache." She says nothing her head still turned towards the ground. I run my index finger along her jawline, under her chin and gently lift her head until her eyes meet mine. I half expect her to strike me for touching her, but she doesn't she only stares at me. Tears forming in her eyes. Everything in me is shouting at me to dismiss this conversation; telling me that I shouldn't force her to talk about something that causes her great discomfort.
"What is making you unhappy?" I say softly
A tear escapes and rolls down her beautiful cheek as she says "Me."
My eyebrows furrow in confusion. "I do not understand."
She closes her eyes for a moment , taking a deep breath; she then opens them and looks at me again. "I make myself unhappy."
"How so?"
"By pushing people away." She pauses, as if expecting me to say something. I don't; she continues. "when Sam first imprinted and broke up with me I was crushed; there is no use in denying that because it's painfully obvious that I still am. Instead of dealing with my pain and trying to move on, I've spent the past years lashing out at people. Turning my pain into anger and trying to make others as miserable as I am. Eventually the ones who were close to me began distancing themselves. I don't want to go into further detail because they aren't important. what really matters is the end result. After all is said and done I have no one else to blame but myself for my unhappiness. I brought this upon myself and I made my biggest fear come true."
"What fear?"
More tears begin to fall. I can hear her heartbeat accelerate. With a wavering voice she says "Being alone. I've always feared being alone and now I am. Thanks to myself."
Tears flow out of her eyes, unable to contain her pain any longer she begins to sob. I can resist no longer, I wrap my arms around her shaking frame and hold her tight as she cries into my chest. I rest my head upon hers and breath in her scent. "You are not alone Leah." I say against her hair so it comes out muffled. I pull back unwrap one of my arms and cup her cheek. I use my thumb to wipe away her tears then I lean into her slightly; her breath hitches. "you are not alone." I say once more. Then I lean into her again. This time I don't stop until my lips are lightly pressed against hers. This is what I've wanted to do for so long.
A/N: So what do you guys think? Feedback is always welcome. Good or bad ^_^
