Chapter 2: Boo! Boring Forest Trek
... The walk hadn't helped at all. It'd been an hour or so, and Pikachu was totally bored shipless. There was absolutely nothing to do in this forest! Just like usual, there were no pokémon. There never was, unless there had to be one for the episode's plot. Unless it was the first episode of a new region, or the opening of a movie, or whatever. There were plenty of pokémon around at those times, but where the heck were they now!?
Ignoring that, the forest was very green and dull. Much like the thousands of other forests Pikachu had seen every week of his life.
Yep... simply put, he was bored. He could almost swear he'd never been anywhere near as bored as he was now. The only time he'd ever been this bored before was that one time he'd accidentally caught himself with a pokéball. Something he'd done while trying to... um... 'borrow' Ash's ketchup packets. It hadn't been worth it. He'd been stuck in there for three freaking days! All while Ash had completely trashed Oak's place looking for him, despite the professor's pleading.
Pikachu gave an exaggerated sigh. He was starting to wish he'd stuck with the others. Looking upwards, he noticed that it was getting slightly late. The sky was starting to get fairly orange.
He smiled lightly. Well, this was a fairly pretty sight, if nothing else. He wished he had a significant other who he could spend this time with. Just him and her watching the sunset together. Unfortunately, he didn't know anyone who liked him enough for that, so never mind...
Looking back down, something behind a tree in the distance caught his eye. Curious, he began to run towards it for a better look. As he got nearer, hope welled in his chest that maybe, just maybe... it was another pokémon for him to interact with. Somebody new and exciting and-
... Ah, nope. It was just Team Rocket. Judging by the way they were lying there in an unconscious heap, he guessed that they hadn't yet recovered from the motorcycle accident. Poor jerks.
Looking them over, the mouse couldn't help but notice that the unconscious heap lacked a certain member. That is, Meowth. Glancing around a little, though, he found the weird cat sitting next to a nearby lake. He was using a stick and some worn out-looking string as a makeshift fishing rod, probably trying to catch his dinner or something... in this world where only pokémon existed. Unless it was Kanto, which had regular animals. Such as worms, mongooses and, more importantly, fish.
"[Hey, Meowth!]" Pikachu called out.
After a small startled yelp, the cat quickly turned to face Pikachu. He frowned after seeing who it was. "Oh, well, look who it is! Da twoip's pikachu! You'd better not be tinkin' of blastin' me off after dat junk wid da bike!"
Pikachu shrugged. "[Not unless you're doing illegal stuff, I guess. Are ya?]" he asked, secretly hoping that he was. If only for some fun target practice, if nothing else.
Meowth sighed and returned to blankly staring out at the river. "Nah, not today. Sadly."
Pikachu blinked. "[... What? Why?]"
"[Well, we hit our 'appearance per episode' quota, so dat's it for today. We're pretty much off duty.]"
"[But... what about the times you showed up more than once?]"
"[Dat's when we manage to nab us some overtime hours. Not today, dough.]"
Pikachu clicked his tongue. Dang it. No vaguely entertaining shenanigans today, then. Ash's plumbing issue at the castle could hopefully be fixed with something other than Team Rocket being there at the right time, though... so that was something.
Sitting down next to Meowth, Pikachu also stared out at the lake. It was fairly pleasant, despite the situation, though fishing wasn't exactly Pikachu's idea of fun.
To break the silence, and hopefully have something to look forward to, he decided to ask something. "[Yo, so... got any plans to capture me again later this week? Maybe hopefully with some kind of giant robot?]"
Meowth looked at him oddly. "Eh? What, d'ya want a visit to da baws' office, after all?"
"[No way, but... well, it's kinda fun when you try to steal me, so...]"
"Tsk. Well, nah. We ain't got any hours left for a couple'a days. Dey're tinkin' about startin' a clip show episode soon to save money, so dey're gonna just use flashbacks instead of us guys."
Pikachu's face fell. "[Oh... shame.]" He sighed. "[Well... sorry to hear that, I guess. But hey, just do it for fun for once, who's gonna know? Or care?]"
"[Yeah, right! Where're we gonna get da money for anodder mech? Da last time we came after ya wid one, yer Tunderbolt practically put us outta house 'n' home! So we gotta wait 'till da boss lends us another couple'a hundred before da next one's comin' in."
"[Aww, c'mon…! You don't even have a house or a home, so it's fine! Besides, you could just wear a disguise and use a cage, or something! That's cheap enough, right?]"
"No way, Pikachu! Da fabrics cost a lotta dough, and den we've gotta sew 'em up! Usually a lotta times, because we're awful wid sewin' machines, so t' heck wid dat! Oh, and you don't even wanna know about da cage costs."
"[Oh... okay.]" Dang it, what a disappointment. Looks like easing his boredom by fending off Team Rocket would have to wait for a while.
... Oh well, whatever. There were probably other ways to pass the time. Until then, though, it was probably time to head back to the castle. He didn't have much else to say to the cat anymore... and besides, there was still the prospect of ghosts at the castle! Something he'd honestly forgotten, because of all the shenanigans.
"[Oh well, was nice seeing ya again, but I've gotta jet,]" Pikachu continued. "[No doubt Ash'll be missing me. If he's stopped messing around with the pipes, anyway.]"
"Yeah, sure," Meowth replied. "Catch ya later, Pikachu. Literally, even! Even if da animators will never let da status quo change in a million years."
"[You ain't wrong...]" Pikachu replied dryly.
"Hey, say hi to da rest of da twoips for me, too, won't'cha?"
Pikachu got up and started to head off. "[Yeah, sure thing. Well, bye!]"
"Hey, Meowth, who're you talking to out... there!?" a rough voice said all of a sudden.
Both the pokémon turned their heads at the voice. It was James, who was staring bewilderedly at Pikachu.
Oh dear... was he going to take his chances despite everything, and try to capture him again, anyway?
... A small smile crept across Pikachu's face. No wait, that was an awesome thought! Leave it to good ol' James to overcome the one Rocket-appearance-per-day limit! The mouse was gonna have something fun to do, yet!
"Wahh! Jessie, save me!" James squealed, diving behind a nearby tree.
Tenderly rubbing her head, Jessie walked into view. "What's with all the ruckus? My head feels like-" she started, pausing with wide eyes at the sight of Pikachu. Screaming at the top of her lungs, she toppled backwards out of sight.
... Well, so much for that, then. Heh... though Pikachu wasn't too disappointed. It'd been the funniest thing he'd seen from the goofs in ages. Not that it was saying much...
He was a bit confused, too, though. They usually took any opportunity they could to steal him. Then again, much like Pachirisu and Snivy, they could get very inconsistent occasionally. Sometime, they had a plan which ultimately used some kind of mech... sometimes they just wanted to hang out... sometimes they tried to catch Pikachu with a freaking net... and sometimes, like now, they acted intelligent and ran away from him like wusses. However, despite how easy it made things... it was the boring option, so Pikachu wasn't a huge fan of it.
"Button up, you two! Yer scarin' da fish!" Meowth yelled in a hushed voiced as the two Rocketeers continued to scream.
James and Jessie's screaming continued, though at a much more quiet volume this time.
Pikachu rolled his eyes and started walking away. "[It's alright, I was just leaving anyway. Well... bye!]"
He rapidly left the scene. He could hear the noises of generic Team Rocket-based commotion behind him... but he didn't dare to stop and figure out what was going on. Lest he get a headache on top of the lack of something fun to do.
... Agh, darn it. It was on his mind again! His boring show! Ughh...
Ears drooping, Pikachu sighed as he walked around Mamoswine's large furry leg. Why couldn't life be like it was back in the old days, when everything seemed so new and exciting? Back in those days, it'd seemed like adventure was just around the corner every step of the way... but now he could hardly tell what he'd done five minutes earlier.
Oh yeah... remembering Team Rocket's screaming voices, he was reminded; back in the old days, everyone's voices were amateurish, yet so full of charm and life! Now, almost everyone spoke soooo sloooowlyyyyy... and not to mention, they sounded bored as all heck. Especially Ash Ketchum's voice actress. Though at least she didn't sound as bad as when she was voicing Buneary, instead. Things got very odd, then. What with her slurring and inconsistent voices. Strangely adorable, but odd, all the same. Also, Team Rocket's voices, once pretty amusing and cool, now sounded like literal torture. James sounded like a smoker, Jessie sounded like a living violin, and Meowth sounded like Bugs Bunny and Bubsy Bobcat's embarrassing lovechild.
... Speaking of speaking, everyone's discussions had been so much better back in the day, too! They'd had such banter! Misty, Brock... even Ash of all people had enjoyed sassing each other so much! The quips that'd come out of their mouths had made them sound so charming and funny and great! Now, though... it was like living in a children's show. A very bad children's show. Everyone was either way too pleasant, or way too dim for their own good. Even though Ash used to be one of the most cunning people Pikachu knew, at times. But now, he acted like his brain had melted.
As Pikachu's feet touched down on a dirt road, he exhaled heavily. Oh well, whatever. He was beating a dead ponyta by this point. He wanted his 4kids back, despite some of their weird censorship quirks, but it seemed that was a lost cause by now. What else could be said? But oh well. Ohhhhh well. Ohhh welly welly well. Oh well well welly welly well. Ohhhhh wellllly wellllly well- Wait, what was that sound?
Looking to his side, he saw the freaking spirit cycle coming straight towards him at full speed!
"NYAAAAAAAH!" a voice from it screamed, chilling Pikachu's very soul. Oh crud!
Screaming, he prepared a Quick Attack. However, a horrible sharp pain stopped him.
...
Oh no. Cramp!
Falling to the floor in agony, he twisted around. As he saw the motorcycle rapidly approach, he screamed. "[Oh, legends, too much excitemeeee-!]"
... Everything went black.
TO BE CONTINUED!
Finished:
Old version - 20/08 (August)/2011
New version - 01/01 (January)/2018
Word count: 1,865
VGS2's pointless notes: Oh no! Pikachu got rekt! D: I wonder what will happen…? Except, we all know already, because of the summary. But oh welly wellz… XP
Fun mistakes of the day #1: 'The only time he'd ever been this time was the time he'd accidentally caught himself'
(Pikachu the timelord. I wonder if he'll randomly turn into a woman, too?)
#2: 'Meowth sounded like Bugs Bunny and Bubsy Bobcat's embarrassing love uncle.'
(A love uncle? Sounds… dodgy. XD I think I originally made this mistake because I was gonna say 'Bubsy's embarrassing uncle' at first, but then thought of something better. But then horrible things happened…)
Welp, that's that! Except… y'know what? I should post up the original version of this chappie, too. Just for prosperity's sake. In fact, sure, why not? Here it is, so you can laugh at me from a load of years ago! Enjoy!
¡Warning!
Everything past this point is non-canon to the fic! It's just the old content of It's An Alright Life that's here for a laugh or two! Read on at your own risk, for you will cringe as much as I did while re-reading!
¡Warning!
Old author's note from 2011.
What's this? A serious fanfiction from VGS2?! Surely I jest!
Ah well, believe it or not, but this is something that I've been wanting to do for bloody ages now, and it's just recently that I've decided to stop being a lazy arse and actually make something that isn't completely random.
So yeah, 'tis my first serious fic (unless you really think that Hotel Pikachu's that professional, which I doubt), so naturally it's going to be slightly rough around the edges here and there, but regardless, don't be afraid to criticize or flame as appropriate, or whatever.
Anyways, blah blah blah, let's-a go!
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Pikachu was bored. He hadn't ever been as bored as he was now. Heck, not even the time he accidentally caught himself with a pokéball after going through Ash's bag to look for ketchup packets was as boring as what he was doing now, and it took him nearly three days to get out of that thing!
As calming as this morning stroll through the woods was for him, it didn't help his mood improve much. Infact, it made things worse! Ugh, peaceful serenity does nothing for a mouse's level of interest, so it would seem.
He gave an exaggerated sigh, "Jeeze, it sure is boring around here... Nothing but leaves and trees and- Oh?"
Suddenly, Pikachu's inner monologue was interrupted as he spotted something of interest in the distance. He began running towards it for a better look.
Could it be? Something fun? Something to take his mind off things? Something that could ease his bore- Ah, nope, just Team Rocket. And judging by the way they were lying there in a heap, covered in scorch marks, he guessed that they hadn't yet recovered from the last time they were blasted off. Poor sods.
After observing them for a few seconds, Pikachu couldn't help but notice that the unconscious heap lacked a certain member. After looking around a little more though, he found him sitting next to a nearby lake, using a stick and some worn out-looking string as a makeshift fishing rod, probably trying to catch his breakfast or something.
"Hey, Meowth!"
After a small startled yelp, the cat pokémon quickly turned to face Pikachu. He frowned after seeing who it was, "Oh, you again. Waddaya want? Not finished blasting me off have ya?"
Pikachu shrugged, "Not unless you're doing illegal stuff I suppose. Are ya?"
Meowth sighed and returned to blankly staring out at the river, "Nah, not today."
Pikachu sat down next to Meowth and stared out at the lake with him.
After what seemed like several minutes of awkward silence, Pikachu started talking again, "So... Got any plans to capture me again this week?"
"Eh? Nah, not today. Infact, we're spent 'till next week. Yer last thuderbolt practically put us outta budget, so we gotta wait 'till da boss lends us another couple'a hundred before we can come after ya again with another mech."
Pikachu's face fell, "Oh, shame. Well, sorry about that. You really should start finding better ways to kidnap me though, like a simple disguise, that's usually pretty good!"
"Nah, we always gotta make dem from scratch, and none of us are that good wit' sewing machines, so no thanks."
"Oh... Ok." What a disappointment. Looks like easing his boredom by fending off Team Rocket would have to wait for a while.
Ah well, whatever. Guess he'd have to find some other way to pass the time. 'Til then though, it was probably time to head back to camp. He didn't much else to say, and besides, the sight of the forest was beginning to bore him to tears, "Oh well, was nice seeing ya again, but I've gotta jet. No doubt Ash'll be missing me."
"Ah alright then, catch ya later Pikachu. Say hi to da rest of da twerps for me, will ya?"
Pikachu got up and started to head off, "Hm, sure thing. Well, bye!"
"Hey Meowth, who're you talking to out- ...There!?" Both the pokémon turned their heads to meet James, as he stared bewilderedly at Pikachu. Oh great, he was gonna try to capture him again, wasn't he?
...No wait, he was gonna try to capture him again! That can only be good news, now he'd have something fun to do!
"Wahh! Jessie, save me!"
...Or not. Just as quickly as he appeared, James left the scene by diving behind a tree at the speed of light, clearly not wanting to stay and fight. Oh Arceus, now they had him doing it too.
Still, judging by the way he did that, he probably still had the thunderbolt from last time on his mind.
"Button up, Jimmy! You're scaring the fish!" Meowth yelled in a hushed voiced.
"Oh, er, wahhh..." James tried again, much quieter this time.
Pikachu rolled his eyes and started walking away, "It's alright, I was just leaving anyway. Well, bye!"
He only managed to get a short distance away before, once again, he started to reflect on his life.
These days, all he and Ash's team did these days was battle, train, and occasionally run into a small problem or two, but that was basically the height of his excitement. Oh, and Team Rocket. Hard to forget Team Rocket, always using the same tired old strategies to capture him again and again, and always failing, as evidenced by Pikachu's recent finding in the forest.
Pikachu's ears drooped, why couldn't life be like it was back in the old days, when everything seemed so new and exciting? Back in those days, it seemed like adventure was just around the corner every step of the way, but now he could hardly tell what he did five minutes earlier.
As much as he hated to say it, he missed the old days when Team Rocket were a somewhat decent threat, Ash was a useless trainer (more so than now, at least) and 4Kids kept adding silly censorship quirks to his show. At least those times were interesting as opposed to the boring stuff he gets up to now.
Ah well, can't be helped. He's had these thoughts like 20 times this week alone, he didn't need to start getting depressed over them again. He couldn't help but let his mind wander though, while making his way through the foliage that stood between him and his way home, or to the campsite at least. Was there nothing to occupy his time with?
He became so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't even notice when he walked onto a road, let alone stop to check if it was safe.
He soon regretted this though, because after looking to his left to see what was making those strange honking noises and then staring down the motorbike that was rapidly approaching him, he soon realised that having his head in the clouds was not the greatest of ideas.
He tried to use quick attack to make a swift escape, but his plans, and his consciousness, were soon dashed as the bike rammed into him at full speed.
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Next up: Pikachu awakes to the biggest surprise of his life.
Will it be a good one? Well he just got hit by a motorcyclist, so what do you think?
So there ya have it! Older 'It's An Alright Life'! Now wasn't that a cringefest! :D Let us never speak of this again.
I guess one comment I could make is... that comment about "and 4Kids kept adding silly censorship quirks to his show." was what inspired all of the 4th Wall Breaking of this reboot. Just one silly little thing can change a whole lot, can't it? XP
Welp, that's it. Peace out! c:
