Nabiki - Master of Anything Goes
Nabiki - Master of Anything Goes[R]
Niklas "Hawk" Jonsson


Summary: Ranma made another bet with Nabiki? Won't he ever learn? Well, at least this time it's a bet on an Anything Goes Martial Arts fight between Ranma and Nabiki. Surely our pig-tailed hero is capable of defeating Nabiki, 'aint he? Will this be the one time Ranma actually manages to one-up Nabiki?

Disclaimer: Ranma 1/2, the characters and whatnot are not mine, though I certainly wish they were! The story is mine though, all mine. This series deals with mature subject matters and violence. If this disturbs you, don't read. But if it does, then why the heck are you watching the show/reading the manga in the first place?

Feedback/Flames: Yes, please. Both of them are equally fun to read, although I must admit that I greatly prefer the first variety. :)
I can be found on ICQ as 21771860 or through e-mail as iamhawk@yahoo.com, more stories are available at my nifty lil' site at or by clicking on my handle up above if you're reading this on fanfiction.net.

"speech"
*emphasis/shouts/Kindred Domination/post-hypnotic triggers*
/thoughts/
*/telepathy/*
~translation~
+soundeffect/radio/telephone conversation/TV+

*** Author Rant ***

I just don't get where y'all get the notion that Ranma is so used to female flesh, that it doesn't bother him anymore. Sure, he's pretty dang familiar with his own body and he's even used a variation of Nabiki's distraction himself once or twice. But...

When he comes across a naked Akane, he freezes up. When he views her panties, he freezes up. When he's confronted with a naked Shampoo, he panics. He seems to be somewhat more resistant to bare flesh when Happosai is around, perhaps because the old freak serves as somewhat of a distraction or something. But even during the hot spring episode when the freak was about to lay his hands on a powerful scroll and should serve as a mighty distraction for young Saotome, Ranma was rather bothered by the girlie-girls washing themselves.

So, never underestimate the power a nice set of boobs hold over the male mind. Even with easy access to a great set of his own, I'd say that a different set that is as shapely as Nabiki's ought to be good for a mental reboot against Ranma.

Though it's certainly not the near-lethal attack due to loss of blood it would be if she used it against, say, Ryoga. :)

*** Author Shutting Up ***


*** Previously, on 'Nabiki - Master of Anything Goes' ***


"You punched correctly, the wrist is fine. But your fingers... I think you sprained your index finger, the others seem fine, though you'll probably be bruised for a while." Ranma ventured, exhaling with relief, before he suddenly got tense again. "Uh... Nabiki..."

"Yeah?" she replied, gingerly trying to move her fingers.

"Could you... Perhaps... Close your jacket..." Ranma mumbled, averting his eyes and blushing furiously.

"Wha..." Nabiki begun, then looked down. "Oh." escaped her lips, then she hurriedly pulled her jacket close and retied the belt over it. "Got a good look, eh?" she teased him, causing him to blush even more furiously then he already did. "Well, I did hit you like I said I would. You can enjoy the rest of the week as a free man, then we'll begin your month of slavery on Monday." Nabiki magnanimously announced, patting Ranma on the back with her left hand. "Don't feel too bad about it, Ranma-baby. When it comes to 'Anything Goes', I've got you beat. Hands down." she informed him, then walked off in search for Kasumi and her medical skills, leaving Ranma in the Dojo, standing in stunned silence and sporting beet red cheeks.

*** Roll credits ***






Chapter Two:


+Beep+ +Beep+ +Beep+

Ranma sighed and stood up, putting his manga aside as the beeper Nabiki had lent him suddenly went off. She wanted him for something again. He strolled off towards her room and walked in without knocking.

"Yeah?" he inquired and groaned as he saw her lying flat on her stomach, completely naked except for a towel covering her middle. The first week had been gruelling, as she had him mostly doing all sorts of boring, tedious and largely unnecessary tasks for her. Then she'd returned from an outing one evening, rubbing her left shoulder with a disgruntled expression on her face. Apparently, she'd been out collecting money and one particularly disgruntled debtor had thrown the money at her feet, then stalked off, shoving her into a wall in the process.

She'd ordered him to give her a neck-rub to relieve the tension and thus discovered just how good he was at it. After a life of training, tension, strains and minor injuries, he'd picked up the techniques pretty darn fast and knew that if he ever found himself in serious need of cash, he could always take a job as a masseur or physical therapist.

After that, the tasks she gave him merely for her own amusement and his annoyment stopped coming... Mostly... But instead she called him in for a real massage at least once a day in the week since. This was her second today.

The weird thing was that she actually needed it! He'd never met such a tense individual in his entire life before. He'd never even begun to suspect just how much pressure the middle Tendo sister was under. Though after this time spent together with her, he'd started to realise just how hard she worked herself and those around her for the good of her family.

He grabbed a bottle of oil from her nightstand and started rubbing it in, as Nabiki let out several contented sighs. Once that was done, he really got to work and her sighs turned into low moans and pleased whimpers.

The third massage had not been pleasant, as Akane had walked in on them during it. She had *NOT* been pleased to find her sister naked, on the bed, with only a towel covering her middle section, while Ranma was giving her a massage. For a while, he had worried that all that screaming would cause his ears to fall off and he still had a bruise from where she'd clobbered him before he even had a chance to start to explain the situation.

"Nabiki, do you... Oh! Oh my." Kasumi trailed off after having walked into the room, stopping for a few moments, before she apparently concluded that nothing indecent was going on and thus carried on as usual. "Do you have any dirty laundry?" she asked, walking fully into the room.

"A sweater on my chair, panties and socks in the corner." Nabiki replied, pointing at one corner of the room where the items in question were bundled up on the floor. For such a well-organised person, she was surprisingly sloppy when it came to cleaning her own room. "OoooOOOooohhhh... Yeah, right there..." she moaned. "This is heaven..." she purred.

"Seems like it." Kasumi agreed with a wistful note in her voice as she collected Nabiki's discarded articles of clothing.

"Y'want one?" Nabiki offered.

"Oh! But... I shouldn't... I've got to..." Kasumi started.

"Kasumi! Do you want one?" Nabiki interjected.

"There's so much to..." Kasumi tried.

"Kasumi! Do. You. Want. A. Massage." Nabiki interrupted her again.

"Yes." Kasumi finally admitted.

"We'll be done soon. Drop off the laundry, go into your room and get ready. I'll send Ranma over when he's done with me." Nabiki told her older sister.




+Knock+ +Knock+ +Knock+

"Yes..." Kasumi mumbled from inside.

"It's me." Ranma replied.

"Come in..." Kasumi hesitantly offered after a while. She was clearly just as nervous as Ranma was. He opened the door and stopped, closing his eyes as he took a deep breath and tried to center himself, before opening his big mouth.

"Uh... Kasumi?" he started.

"Yes, Ranma?" she replied weakly.

"I think... Uh... You forgot... Eh... The towel..." Ranma muttered, keeping his eyes shut.

"Oh my!" she exclaimed and Ranma heard creaks and shuffling of cloth against skin as Kasumi rearranged things. "There." she finally announced and Ranma opened his eyes again, exhaling with relief as the dangerous area was covered. Apparently by a pillowcover she'd pulled off one of her pillows. "I forgot about the towel." she mumbled in acute embarrassment.

"Eh... Ah... It's... Okay." Ranma responded as he walked fully into the room and closed the door. After a moment of hesitation, he locked it as well. It wouldn't do for Akane to storm in on him giving Kasumi a massage. It had been bad enough when it was Nabiki, but if Akane knew that he was getting 'hands on' with a semi-nude Kasumi, the innocent Tendo sister, he'd never hear the end of it.

"Ranma... Be gentle..." Kasumi stated and Ranma turned beet red.

"What?!" he demanded, certain that he'd heard wrong. Had to have heard her wrong!

"Be gentle. Nabiki likes to go deep and feel the pressure. I don't." Kasumi explained herself and Ranma exhaled with relief, cursing his dirty mind for running off on him. Of course she hadn't meant anything like what he imagined, it was Kasumi for crying out loud! /All in your head, moron. It's all in your head.../ he told himself. /I am not a pervert. I am not like Happosai./ he added for good measure.

He pulled out the bottle of oil from his pocket, then applied a generous amount of it, trying not to think of the fact that he was running his hands over a nearly completely naked Kasumi. For some reason, this was worse then when doing the same with Nabiki. When it was Nabiki, he could shrug it off, even if he was somewhat uncomfortable with all that naked skin filling up almost his entire field of vision. He could tell himself that she was forcing him, that he had no control over it and that he was honor-bound to do as she asked him due to the nature of their bet.

But that didn't help now that he had Kasumi underneath his hands, running his callused hands over that impeccable expanse of naked silky-smooth skin. /I am not a pervert./ he repeated mentally for good measure. He was surprised at how tense she was, at how many knots he found and over just how much stress she must be under. He closed his eyes as he worked, trying to remember the last time he saw Kasumi take time for herself and failed to recall even one such instance. She was always around, always doing something, always with a kind and bright smile on her lips.

"MMmmmMMMMMMmmmmm..." she purred./I am *not* a pervert!/ he fervently insisted, closing his eyes for a few moments. When opened his eyes again, he was determined to ensure that Kasumi got the very best he could offer her. He also instantly decided to ensure that she got more help around the house before she worked herself to an early grave. "Oh... *Oh* my..." Kasumi exclaimed as Ranma decided to give the girl a real treat. Nabiki had only gotten the standard massages he'd used for years while on the road with Genma. But he'd learned things lately, he'd learn to manipulate Ki. He'd learned to use pressure points. He *knew* how to make it an experience Kasumi would never forget.

She was like putty in his hands, as he worked out the kinks in her body. She purred like a kitten as he worked down deep with infusions of his Ki, rather then pressure. She moaned out loud as he used various pressure points to relieve stress, accelerate healing and increase the production of the body's own drugs. By the time he was done, she'd fallen asleep with a shit-eating grin on her face.

He put the oil back into his pocket, then snuck out of the room, closing the door behind him, leaving Kasumi to a well-deserved rest.

Of course, Ranma being Ranma, not even such a simple thing as sneaking out of a room could be done without complications.

"Ranma! What were you doing in Kasumi's room?!" Akane demanded, then glared down at his oily hands. "AAAAAAHHHH! You... You... You... You... You *PERVERT*!" she thundered and Ranma wisely decided to retreat for the moment, bolting away at top speed, leaving a fuming Akane behind.




When Ranma returned a few hours later, his father and Mr Tendo had apparently found out about his recent activities, something he had managed to keep a secret up until that point. They had merely seen him spending more time around Nabiki and assumed it meant that he was getting better along with his fiancé's sister, saw it as a good sign and then stumbled off to celebrate the impending wedding.

Now when the truth apparently had gotten out, they were less then pleased.

"SON! HOW DARE YOU GIVE MASSAGES TO YOUR FIANCEE'S SISTERS, BUT NOT YOUR FIANCEE?!" Demon-Head Soun demanded.

"RANMA?! YOU LOST TO A GIRL?!" Genma demanded. "Oh, woe is me! My own flesh and blood, a pitiful weakling!" he continued, bemoaning his fate as he attempted to beat some sense into his weak son.

+THWACK+

"Ow..." Genma whimpered from where he landed out in the yard.

"If a girl manages to beat a 'pitiful weakling' like me, but I still manage to beat you, then what does that make you, pops?" Ranma spluttered, then ducked out of the way as the demon-head whipped at him, sprouting accusations and complaints that he wasn't getting his hands on Akane instead of her sisters.

"You blabbed, huh?" Ranma asked Nabiki as he passed by where she was sitting at the table, calmly munching on a cookie as she observed Ranma dodging her father.

"Nope. Akane did." Nabiki replied, then continued eating until the next time Ranma passed near her. "By the way. What did you do to Kasumi? She just won't stop grinning like a loon and it took nearly two hours before she managed to stand on her own two feet."

"Well, she was pretty worn out and tense, so I kinda went all out on her." Ranma replied, then ran another lap around the room.

"Do you know how kinky that sounds, Ranma-baby?" Nabiki inquired as he returned to the table. "Just what did you do when you 'went all out on her'?" she asked during the next lap, her curiosity piqued.

"Pressure points, Ki manipulation, massage. The works." Ranma replied as he darted past Nabiki yet again.

"Stop running. You're making me dizzy." Soun said, his eyes unfocused and glazed from his head swivelling round and round, while his body never moved. "Oooohhhh, pretty colours..." he mumbled, then keeled over and fainted.

"And you haven't done that with me... Because?" Nabiki inquired, her eyes dangerously narrowed.

"Uh. You... Never asked?" Ranma ventured cautiously, knowing that he was now on very shaky ground and that the slightest mistake might mean instant disaster.

"And you never offered... Because?" Nabiki demanded.

"Uh... Eh... I... Eh... Never thought of it?" he offered, not having anything better to say or capable on coming up with a convincing lie on such short notice.

Nabiki fumed silently as she mulled that one over for a few seconds, then apparently decided that it wasn't worth flaying him for. She shrugged and visibly relaxed, though her glare got even more hard.

"Next time, I want what she got. Am I making myself clear?" she asked.

"Crystal. You want it just as good as I gave Kasumi, check." Ranma confirmed, nodding furiously.

"We are still talking about a massage, aren't we, Ranma-baby?" Nabiki inquired, her gaze softening and her lips quirking upward into a teasing smile.

"Perhaps... Do you want it to be only a massage?" Ranma responded, which would have been oh so cool, if he had been able to pull it off. It wasn't nearly as impressive with him starting to blush even before he'd finished the sentence and being completely incapable of meeting Nabiki's gaze due to acute embarrassment.

Still, it took Nabiki by surprise and she studied him in silence as he squirmed under her careful scrutiny.

"Well, well, well. What do you know..." Nabiki mumbled to herself. "Ranma-baby! I'm impressed. I see that I've been a good influence on you during these two weeks!" she praised him. "You have a lot to learn, though. A *LOT*." she added, then slung her right arm across his shoulders. "Don't you worry about that though. You keep giving me all these wonderful massages and I'll turn you into a shameless tease in hardly no time at all!" she promised.

"And... Uh... If I don't wanna become one?" he ventured.

"Ranma-baby. In all the time that we've known each other, how often has what you wanted had any relevance whatsoever on our dealings?" Nabiki inquired with a wide grin.

"Uh... Not ever?" he replied after a few seconds.

"That was a rhetorical question, you dolt." Nabiki responded with a bemused shake of her head. "You really do have a *lot* to learn."




"OOoohhhhhh MMmmmyyyyyyyy GGgggooooooodddd..." Nabiki moaned as she regained consciousness, then instantly reached for her telephone. There was *no* time to loose. She only had Ranma for the rest of the month and after that, she'd have to come up with some other way of getting him to work for her. At the moment, she was even ready to pay him. Hell, she was even feeling so damned fucking good that she would be willing to give him a part of the profits!

Not a big part, of course. But considering who she was, it was a generous gesture of near saintly proportions none the less.

"Ryo-chan, it's me. Drop everything and I really mean *everything*! I need you to find some space to rent in central Nerima, it doesn't need to be all that big, just a couple of rooms, but I want a good location. I need flyers printed and delivered, advertising Divine Massages at the address you rent for me. The first five minutes are free! Threaten, coerce, bribe or whatever, but I want that space to be accessible for me by tomorrow." Nabiki prattled off the moment the girl in the other end picked up.

+Uh, sure thing boss. But... Are you sure about the 'free' part?+ she inquired, no doubt wondering if her boss was ill or drunk.

"Oh, I'm very sure. It's just like with drug dealers. The first one is always free, then when you got them hooked, you start charging through the roof." Nabiki responded with a distinctly feral note in her voice. She rattled off a few last-minute instructions, then hung up with a smug look on her face. These massages... None who got one, would be able to stay away from them. Nobody! When she got the rumour mill working, spreading the word that there was a cute young man giving out heavenly massages, they'd have customers lined up around the block.

"Every single one who gets a freebie, will be coming back as a paying customer. Day after day after day. This is way more addictive then narcotics." Nabiki grinned smugly to herself.

"Why, thank you." Ranma suddenly spoke up. "Good to know." he added and Nabiki twirled her head around, suddenly spotting a mop of black hair sticking up at the foot of her bed.

"Ranma!" she exclaimed. "What are you still doing here?!" she demanded.

"Calmest place in the house." he responded with a sigh. "Akane is on the war-path, the parents are furious and Kasumi keeps begging me for another massage. Happosai apparently overheard her and now he too wants a massage, only he wants me to do it in my cursed form... With my tits." Ranma groused, shaking his head in disgust and revulsion at the idea. He held up a book over the edge of the bed so that she could see it. "So I holed up here, figured that I might just as well get some reading done and try to avoid getting zapped by Hinako-sensei tomorrow."

"I'm naked in here!" Nabiki protested.

"With a towel covering the important bits. Just like you were when you got your massage, only then I had my hands on you." Ranma debated. "'Aint nuthin' I haven't seen before anyways." he added flippantly. Nabiki waited for a few moments, then grinned.

"You didn't say anything about you having the better body this time." Nabiki stated.

"Yeah, well... I learn from my mistakes." Ranma defended himself, well remembering the first massage, when Nabiki had made a comment about how lucky he was to get his hands on such a great body. He'd responded that he could get his hands on an even better body whenever he got wet. After that, he had spent the following five minutes curled up on the floor, whimpering in pain as his nuts slowly started to recover from being squeezed in Nabiki's iron grip.

"Eventually." Nabiki agreed. She'd only had to use the Tendo Nabiki Ultimate Anything Goes Negotiation Technique, the Nutcracker of Persuasion, twice before he seemed to get the point and started controlling his mouth around her. As far as teaching aides went, the Nutcracker of Persuasion was incredibly effective. It certainly seemed to work a whole lot better then Akane's fists, feet, mallet and acidic statements ever had. Akane still couldn't get Ranma to stop insulting her, but Nabiki appeared to have managed with a simple two-step program. "Aw, heck. I don't really mind. You could have let me know that you were still here, though." she added with a faint hint of irritation creeping into her voice.

"I would have, if you hadn't dived for the phone the moment you started to stir again." Ranma interjected. "So, I'm going to become a masseuse for you, is that it?" he inquired, a faintly irritated note in his own voice.

"Look, Ranma. You've got a gift. It's... That was... I can't even begin to describe it. With the money we'll make off your massages, I won't have to sell pictures any longer. I won't have to run betting pools. I won't have to blackmail people." Nabiki replied. "I'll have you work every free minute for the rest of the month, but I'll pay you for your work. That'll give us a decent amount of customers. Once your month is over, we can continue running the business part-time, raise the prices and only keep those customers who are willing to pay what we demand. You'll still have time for school and Martial Arts, you'll make some money for yourself and the household will be kept afloat." Nabiki continued passionately. "Please, Ranma. At least think about it?"

He already was.

He knew, or at least thought he knew, just how much she actually hated doing what she was forced to do, in order to maintain a somewhat steady income for the household to live off. He wasn't all that comfortable with it either. After this time spent with her, he'd learned more about her operations then he'd ever wanted to know. It was hard to enjoy even Kasumi's cooking, when he knew what sort of things had paid for the ingredients. He had thought the pictures of him and Akane were bad enough, but in comparison to some of the other things...

Had he known before, *really* known some of the things Nabiki had been up to, he never would have said a word about the pictures. Having a few semi-nude pictures of his female form being distributed around the school was nothing compared to some of her black-mail schemes, the tests she sold and the poor people she manipulated like pieces on a Shogi board, just in order to ensure that her family had food on the table, power in the outlets and water in the faucets.

But that didn't mean that he'd give in easily. He had learned well from Nabiki.

"How much?" he inquired, having learned that particular lesson pretty darn quickly after Nabiki took him under her wing. She heard him shuffling about. She turned her head around and saw him turning around, sitting up on his knees as he looked at her. She controlled a blush and hastily made sure that the towel was still covering her rump. While she wasn't an excessively modest person and having a distracted opponent had certain indisputable benefits during negotiations, she didn't quite feel like baring herself any more then necessary at the moment.

"500 Yen an hour and 1% of the profit." Nabiki offered, causing Ranma to raise an inquisitive eyebrow. "Yeah, yeah. I'm one *very* satisfied woman at the moment, so it's a bit higher then you might otherwise have been offered." she groused.

"I'll consider it." Ranma replied, then smirked. It wasn't quite as good as Nabiki's predatory grins, but he was slowly, very slowly, getting there. "And I'll also consider what I'll be charging *you* for continued massages, once the month is up." he drawled, causing a chill to run up her spine. So, this was what it felt like to be on the receiving end. Nabiki didn't like it, not one bit.

"You do that." Nabiki agreed. She wasn't feeling up to the task of debating with him now. She was way to mellow to do it efficiently, way to content and dazed to think rationally. In her current state, she might just very well loose against Ranma and she didn't want that to happen.

She'd get him back for that dig once her mind was clear and her thinking unclouded by a near post-coital haze. Or what she imagined one of those would feel like, at any rate. This was exactly how she imagined it would feel after having been shown a *good* time in the sack.

The End! ( For now... )