Chapter Two - Nostalgia

"Yanzin. I told you to go shopping today."

"What?" Yanzin said irritably. He was sitting in the small communal living room of the unit where he lived. It would be a bit much to call it a 'home', really, because Yanzin wasn't very fond of either the building or the people he had to share it with. He turned around to look at Minsath, awkwardly resting his one good arm on the back of the couch.

"Turn that stupid music off, Yanzin, I'm talking to you."

Reluctantly, Yanzin bent and switched off the shiny black CD player by his feet. He did enjoy some types of human music. It was soothing. He would never have attempted to explain that to Minsath, though - she would stare him down with imperious eyes and probably despise him for the rest of their interactions.

"What is it?" he said.

"You were supposed to go to the store and buy food today," Minsath repeated. "You didn't."

Yanzin sighed and let his head fall back against the cushions. "I forgot. I think it's understandable."

"Forgot!" She was livid. "What do you mean you forgot?"

"I just – it just didn't occur to me. I'm sorry."

"Well!" Minsath said sarcastically. "I'm sure we can rest easy, knowing that if Yanzin doesn't do something it's only because he forgot. It's not as if he has anything more important to be doing."

Her human morph was short, with smooth black hair and snapping dark eyes. He hadn't known her at all before morphing to human - he thought they had assigned people to dwellings more or less randomly.

"I'm sorry," Yanzin said. "It's difficult for me to carry things anyway." He lifted up his arm, encased in the white plaster cast, and waved it at her. "Why couldn't you do it?"

"Because I told you to do it."

"Yes, but why? It would be much easier for you to do it," Yanzin said. He didn't know why he was pressing the issue. You never won arguments with Minsath.

He wished that they'd just been allowed to live alone. Of course, that would have been more dwellings for them to find, so it was easier to randomly place them in groups of three or four in a family house. He could appreciate that it was much more efficient this way. That didn't make Minsath any less aggravating.

"I don't see why I should have to pick up the slack because you've incapacitated yourself," she said now. "Like the fool you are. Idiot."

This was a sentiment he'd heard a couple of times already. "Just drop it, will you?" Yanzin groaned. "I'm not the only one who's been beaten up. You've dealt with this too."

"It doesn't happen to me as much," Minsath said pointedly. "And I walk away without managing to break my arm and get a concussion. I have to wonder if you aren't doing something stupid to attract the attention. In any case, stop trying to change the subject," she said. "You disobeyed me."

He had disobeyed... ugh.

The very first thing Minsath had done - dumped in this unit newly human and dazed - was to ask Yanzin and Arodin what rank they'd been. They had both been significantly lower, of course.

"Disobeyed, Minsath?" he said wearily. He should have kept quiet. He should have bowed his head and apologised and weathered her bad temper. But he was tired, and irritated, and his arm ached still, and his skin itched under the cast. He hadn't really felt safe enough to go out much except for work. He had very little patience tonight and he didn't feel like meekly apologising to her as he usually did. "So what will you do? Are you going to have me shot? Have me demoted? Are you going to report me to your superiors for punishment, Minsath?"

There was a small sound as she put down whatever she was carrying. Her voice was quiet. "What was that?"

Yanzin gritted his teeth and stood. "You heard me just fine," he said, turning around. "What are you going to do about it?"

She stared at him from across the room, her eyes narrowed. She wore black, always. Her head was cocked at an arrogant angle, still used to the days when seven-foot-tall bladed hork bajir leapt to do her bidding. The unornamented, unarmoured human clothes didn't suit her. She said nothing.

"That's what I thought," Yanzin said, lightly, after a few long moments. "Nothing. You're not going to do anything about it. Because there isn't anything you can do."

"Insubordination, is it?" she hissed. "You think you can disrespect your superiors? You think you can blatantly disregard the- "

"I have no superiors," Yanzin shot back at her.

"Oh, I understand," she said sardonically. "Authority is chafing a bit, is it? You're sick of discipline and obedience. You'd rather be like the humans, with their inane notions of equality and their idle, weak willed disorganisation! Quite the cowardly little rebel we have here!"

"Authority?" Yanzin said. He threw his good hand out in the air. "What authority? You're not a Sub-visser any more, Minsath! You have no authority! You're just like me!"

"Like you?" She laughed shrilly. "No, my sad, pathetic little underling, I don't think I'll ever be like you. You're defeated. You're finished. The humans have managed to break you. You can't see the point to anything anymore and you want everybody else be like you!"

"I'm not pathetic," Yanzin said tightly. He found himself walking towards her. "You're hopelessly deluded. You pretend that you're in command here because you just can't bear the truth: that you're finished, you're a prisoner, and you only live on humanity's mercy! Just like everybody else!"

"You're a traitor," she said, stepping forward. "You betray everything we are by your weakness!"

"I'm no traitor!"

"Face it, Yanzin," she said, stabbing her finger into his chest. "You're just. Like. Them. You're weak. Your cowardice and disloyalty would bring the Yeerk Empire down!"

"The Empire?" Yanzin shouted. "It's already been brought down! It's dead! It's not coming back!"

"The Empire will never die while loyal yeerks still live!" Minsath said, her face blazing.

"You're crazy," Yanzin said. He shook his head and laughed bitterly. She was crazy. There was no point in arguing with her. "It's gone. We fought and we lost, and it's all over. It is gone."

He stepped back from her. She watched him with straight shoulders, her chest moving as she breathed, her hands in fists by her sides and her chin tilted up.

Yanzin backed away. He hugged his left arm to his chest; it ached dully. He hated that his voice wasn't quite steady. "I'm no traitor, because there's nothing to betray. You're not a Sub-Visser. The Empire is dead. And I'm not interested in playing along with this pathetic little re-enactment that you're clinging to."

He went to bed.

They couldn't live their lives thinking that the old days were going to come back, he told himself in the dark. What was left? Yanzin knew that a handful of ships had escaped with Kandronas on board, but the Andalite fleet was hunting those down even now. Even if they were to survive and threaten Andalite supremacy again, that would mean nothing for the yeerks on Earth. A reborn Empire light years away would change nothing for Yanzin.

I am not pathetic, he told himself. I am not broken. I'm just being realistic.