Tell your friends! Tell your mothers and brothers and sisters and fathers! Chapter 2 is here so fear no more! Do R&R and spread the word about this fic! I hope you can guess what's coming next. I'll give you a hint at the end...
The images flashed through her mind- the wormhole and the clouds disappearing into black. She could see the huge ship launching more of its army at her, and the suit giving up the ghost. Falling, letting the zero gravity pull her back towards the hole which she knew she would never make. The darkness, no light. Fear. And the Chitauri whale, blasting through it not knowing how much longer the suit would hold out.
Toni's sleeping mind panicked, her nails digging deeper into her palms and letting blood ooze out. She shot forward, awoken by the pain, breath heavy and sweat soaking her brow. She looked around, her room was dark and the clouds blocked stars that night. Toni pushed the covers back and swung her legs out of bed. She pushed her hands through her hair, resting her elbows on her knees. She felt the sting of tears in her eyes so she blinked them back, standing up.
The Avenger's tower was quiet, its occupants asleep in their respective beds and nests. Toni padded her way to the elevator, wiping her brow with shaking hands. Steve's room. Steve. Where's Steve? Her mind told her as the elevator dinged and then opened. And then she was there, standing in front of the super soldier's door hoping that she wouldn't upset him by barging in at two in the morning.
Carefully Toni pushed the door to his room open and walked in. It was dark in the room, but Steve's bed was silhouetted, revealing that it was empty. Toni fell back against the wall, a shaking hand covering her forehead as she tried to calm down. Breathe Toni, think. Think about where Steve would be. She thought, her mind coaxing her off a mental ledge.
Toni knew Steve now, she knew that if he wasn't sleeping he'd be beating away his worries. She was, in fact, right. Steve was in the training room, one bag already downed and spilling sand out of a whole. His brow was furrowed in concentration and he was hitting hard enough that Toni feared he would break another bag. Toni walked in, letting the sound of the sliding doors shock Steve out of his late night therapy session. He looked up. She stood in the doorway.
"I couldn't sleep." He said, pointing to the punching bag with his thumb. Toni nodded.
"Neither could I." She replied. He bit his lip and walked over to her, pulling her into a hug. Her arms slid around him as she tried not to cry or shake. Steve sighed as she buried her face in his shoulder. He found his hand on her head, pulling her closer and closing his eyes. Something inside him feared that these demons would plague them for a long time. Something else inside him hoped that they could share the demons.
STSTSTSTST
Toni was awoken by the sounds of Natasha's harsh Russian echoing through the door followed by pounding. Toni groaned, rubbing an eye and realizing that for the first time in a long time she'd slept well. Then she realized that Steve's arm was draped around her and she remembered last night; going down to the training room after a particularly horrible set of nightmares.
"Get up Steve." Nat called from outside. "Clint's making breakfast and you know the rules about meals." Toni heard a groan and then Steve pushed himself forward, his arm rising away from her. He looked over to discover Toni was lying in his bed and he froze.
"Am I forgetting something really important about last night?" He asked. Toni grinned and shook her head.
"Not much." She said, not wanting to bring up the panic attack she'd had before going to find him. Steve bit his lip and looked down at her. "Gonna leave a girl in your bed and not kiss her?" Toni demanded. Steve cracked a nervous grin and then pecked her on the lips, which left Toni slightly disappointed. Instead, she smiled and pushed herself forward, turning to let her lips brush past Steve's. She could feel his breath catch as she did so, making her grin as she stood.
Steve watched her stand and straighten her tank top. He swung his feet to the floor and mentally coaxed himself to stand, to follow Toni out the door. To stay optimistic that today was going to be good.
"Come on Capsicle, Birdbrain's making food... God forbid it have eggs in it." She mumbled, reaching out to pull him off the bed.
It had been relatively unofficial now for three weeks, Toni insisting that telling the others would be touchy, but Steve felt like last night was... different. Steve hadn't, in fact, known that Toni was having panic attacks and she hadn't known of his issues with sleeping; how every night the super soldier would be up and beating a new bag to death. But now both knew of the other's mental state and, Steve realized, she'd slept well in his arms last night.
Steve hesitantly slid his hand into hers, letting her help him up. He didn't expect it when Toni kept pulling and ended up practically throwing Steve at herself. Cap and she were suddenly together, Steve accidentally pinning her to stabilize them.
"You okay?" He breathed. Toni grinned, nodding slightly, and then eased her lips over his. She was warm- her lips were warm- and then an arm was around Steve's waist, pulling him closer. Oddly, he found himself melting into the kiss, letting Toni wash over him. The moment was abruptly ended by another bang on the door and then it swung open to reveal Nat and Clint.
"Oh whoa." Clint breathed. Nat grumbled something in Russian and then threw her hands on her hips, giving Clint a look. "Wow, I was not expecting that."
"I told you they're a thing." Nat barked. Steve realized he'd pushed himself off Toni, but it had been too late and the other two Avengers had seen them.
"I've got to go revise the menu for this morning." Clint said, backing away from the situation. Natasha just kept her gaze fixed menacingly on Steve. Toni watched the two, wondering which one would spontaneously combust first. (She'd liked to have believed that the super soldier could have withstood the Black Widow's gaze but it was unlikely.)
Steve suddenly felt how warm his cheeks really were, flushed red in color and burning hotly. Nat pursed her lips and then spun around, making way down the hall for the elevator. Toni looked over at Steve and burst out laughing. He watched her incredulously. She was doubled over, propping herself up off her knees as she practically howled. Steve's eyes were wide.
"I thought you said you wanted to keep it quiet?!" He shouted, hands out in front of himself. Toni looked up, cheeks red and eyes watery.
"Your face Steve..." She took a breath. "Oh my God your face. I wish you could have seen it. Oh my God." She cackled. Steve blinked.
"What are you...? What?" He replied blankly. Toni shook her head.
"Nothing, nothing. The moment's over. Come on." She said, taking his hand and leading him out the door.
As they exited the elevator the entire room fell silent. Thor, Clint, Nat, Bruce, and Pepper all stood before the two in silence. It was Saturday and Saturday was their special breakfast day, of which the requirements stated that if you are in or are affiliated with the Avenger's Team then you have to show your face. Judging by the looks on everyone's faces as Toni and Steve walked in, five feet apart from each other, Clint had come running in the room screaming about what he'd seen. Toni made a mental note to trash the idiot's nest later.
"So! When beeth the larval human arriving?!" Thor shouted. Steve shot a glance of terror at Toni and then collected himself.
"What? No. It's not like that." Steve said. Toni sighed, walked over to the wrap-around couch in front of the TV and plopped down on it. Thor grinned at Steve, an odd and almost creepy smile.
"Of course not friend Rogers!" Thor said, winking. It seemed the God had picked upon insinuations.
"There's no baby Thor. I'm not pregnant, nor do I plan on being. Is it that big of a deal? I mean really!" Toni cried, throwing her arms into the air. Steve slinked over to one of the barstools in an attempt to stay out of the situation. "Are we having breakfast or not?" She huffed. Clint came swinging out of the kitchen, a grin on his face.
"Pancakes!" He sang. Toni practically leapt up, it appeared that out of the entire group Clint could make the best pancakes and Toni appreciated that. Pepper cleared her throat at the rest of the group and they all sat down at the bar island.
Toni realized that she'd automatically seated herself next to Steve and the others had filled the bar, leaving her no room to switch places. Suddenly there was a plate in front of her and it had a heart pancake on it. She looked up, glaring daggers at Clint. Nat looked over at her plate, craning her neck to see and then she was up, grabbing Clint by the back of his shirt to drag him out. Toni slid the plate away from her, passing it on to Steve, and stood.
"Not hungry." She growled. Steve stared at the heart and panicked.
"Neither am I." He reciprocated, following her out.
Steve caught the elevator with her which just made her angrier. He looked down at her, double-taking.
"What?" There was no reply. "What? What did I do now?!" He cried.
"They'll think we went off to have sex or something! God Steve, how hard is it to pick up on those little details?!" She shouted back. Steve's face fell slightly.
"Oh."
"Oh my ass buddy! Clint is so dead. So very dead. Jarvis, the balcony please." She said.
"Yes miss." Jarvis replied.
"What are you doing?" Steve asked, starting to worry.
"Wouldn't you like to know?" Toni growled.
"Why are we going to the balcony?"
"I dunno, maybe because Clint!" Toni shrieked. Steve, panicking, threw himself at her. He didn't know what he was doing, just that he need to distract her and hopefully calm her down. The two were a mess of lips and arms and Toni was pinned against the wall again and his hands were in her hair and he felt oddly guilty for liking what was happening. And then the elevator doors opened and he wondered, later, why life seemed to interrupt at the worst of times.
Clint and Nat stood before them once more, Toni's eyes shot over to them as she and Steve froze in place. Clint was practically hysterical.
"Oh for fu- What is with you two?!" Toni screamed.
"Getting it on in an elevator." Clint laughed, hanging on Nat. Nat looked down at her partner.
"He... I have no answer." Nat admitted. Toni sighed and pushed Steve off her, slightly disappointed that his lips weren't on her anymore. "We'll take it after you two are off." Nat instructed.
STSTSTSTST
It was night and Toni was staring at her bed. She couldn't help but think of the dreams that plagued her sleep for the previous few nights, worse than the ones that sent to Steve's arms. She bit her lip then turned around. When she opened the door she was surprised to find Steve standing in front of her, frozen in the action of preparing to knock.
"Steve? What are..." She trailed off, catching on the bags under his eyes. "You have problems sleeping, that's right." She mumbled. He chewed on his lip nervously.
"I can go back to-"
"No. I need- I can't sleep either. Not properly. Not like three nights ago." She told him. He nodded and followed her in, closing the door behind him. Before he knew it Toni was in bed, waiting for him to come wrap his arms around her. He took a breath and then did exactly that, pulling her close, and then his eyes were closed. Closed to the daily fear and pain of the world. He felt Toni's breathing which got him in a calming rhythm.
"What do you dream about?" He mumbled to her. She sighed, tightening her grip on his hand.
"New York, the portal... all of it really. And you?" She replied. Steve steeled himself to answer the question.
"It's a long story, not so much as traumatizing, more like destructive. I'm still having a hard time adjusting to this era." He told her. She turned over so she could face him. Up close all of her features were suddenly clear, clear and sharp and always beautiful. Steve brushed some of her hair off her cheek.
"I didn't want to tell you but I found my dad's files on you." She said. He furrowed his brow. "You were anemic and color-blind and asthmatic and... Why did you want to join the army?" She asked. He pursed his lips and shook his head.
"I don't know, it was the right thing to do I guess." He replied. Toni shook her head.
"You're insane. You're so... so... so Steve Rogers." She mumbled and gently kissed him on the lips. She could feel sparks running through her veins at the touch, the closeness that came with the kiss. She pulled away, her lips sliding off.
"Is that a bad thing?" He whispered, perhaps he was flirting but Toni couldn't tell.
"No. No, it's just very startling. It's very- God, the only word I can think of is your name." Toni sighed. Steve smiled and kissed her cheek.
"We should sleep, perhaps now we can both actually do that." He murmured. Toni nodded, pushing her face into his shoulder and closing her eyes. There was a certain comfort in the way his arms wrapped around her, one she wasn't sure if she could get anywhere else.
And so they slept, curled into each like two puzzle pieces, Steve with his arms around her slept soundly for the first time in a long time. There was no need to find Natasha and beg her to talk to him or let him lie next to her or ask her to watch Bolt late at night. Instead he got sleep, real sleep, and he had Toni to help too. He was now her nightmare deterrent, her wall between the dreams of New York and being taken as a hostage and her fear of mortality. And the two dreamt of good things, things that made them happy and didn't give Toni panic attacks or keep Steve up for fear of seeing his friend's last expression.
STSTSTSTST
Toni came sliding into the living quarters where Clint was reading a book entitled The Absolutely True Diary a Part-Time Indian and had a popsicle stuck between his teeth. Where Nat was laying on the couch with her feet in the air and was reading something on her phone. Where Rhodey, who was visiting for the first time in a while, was flipping through the TV channels. And where Steve was attempting to make lunch. Everyone looked up as she scrambled not to slide into the wall. Rhodey flashed her a grin because he hadn't seen her all day. (She'd locked herself downstairs in her shop with Black Sabbath blaring on the stereo system.)
"OhmyGodguysIknowwhatwe'reforthedaywearesogettingfondueandteriyakitogoandwearepicnicingandhavingamovienighttonight." She shouted, meshing the words together.
"Why fondue and teriyaki?" Rhodey asked. Clint looked over at the Colonel sitting in the corner.
"How did you make out any of that?" He asked incredulously.
"Because I'm craving it that's why!" Toni shouted back.
"Fondue? What?!" Steve demanded. "Who is... fondue-ing?" He continued, catching slightly before saying the last word. Everyone gave him a sideways glance.
"We are." Toni replied awkwardly.
"Um... I think I'll pass on that." He mumbled.
"Seriously though guys, how did Rhodes make out any of that?" Clint asked again.
"What? Why?!"
"Because I love fondue..." Toni said. Steve rushed over and led her to the corner.
"Toni, I kind of thought that we weren't ready for that in our relationship." He whispered fiercely. Toni blinked at him. "I assumed that was something that would happen when we're... more serious." He continued. Realization dawned on Toni and suddenly she was doubled over. Nat rocketed forward, alerted by the noise that she thought was screaming. Her muscles visibly relaxed when she saw Toni practically on the floor laughing. Steve looked at her. For the second time that week Toni was laughing at him so hard she was crying. He wondered if this was going to become a thing.
"Toni?" Nat called. Toni started trying to regain herself but it didn't work. She fell into Steve's arms, laughing into his shoulder. There was quiet all around the room as she laughed, and Steve heard her mumbling something that sounded like "Dad wasn't lying!" It reminded Steve that Toni's father was Howard Stark, the man that had basically created him. And that Toni had probably grown up hearing stories and reading comics about Captain America. He winced slightly.
"What happened?" Rhodey asked, standing up to see better. Toni finally collected herself and straightened up.
"Steve thinks that fondue is sex!" She laughed. Clint cracked a grin and Nat just stared at the man supporting Toni Stark. Toni turned back to the super soldier. "Steve, honey, fondue is melted cheese for dipping food in." She said, patting his chest. He looked at her, flushing red.
"I should go finish lunch." He mumbled, head down, and slinked back to the kitchen. Toni worked her way over to Rhodey as a chorus of laughter broke out in the room. She plopped down next to him, bumping shoulders.
"How you been?" She asked coolly, like she always did around him.
"Pretty damn good Toni. What about you? I didn't know you and Steve were- uh- dating." He said. Toni shrugged, glad that her old friend finally decided to stop by.
"Yeah... that's not even a story really. And technically we weren't officially dating till a few days ago." She said.
"Ah yes, the old after-battle intercourse eh?" Thor said, surprising the two. Toni jumped slightly at his voice.
"No we were just... What the fuck do you mean 'after-battle intercourse'?" She shouted, processing what he'd said.
"You know, to relieve that adrenaline and what not." Thor said, quieter now. Toni glared at him.
"Where is God's name is that a thing?"
"Do mortal warriors not do that? I had thought that you and friend Rogers started that a while ago. And friend Clint and Natasha too." Thor replied. Clint, behind them, blushed a vivid red and Nat glared at him. Toni caught it, but just barely, and she wondered if perhaps there was truth to that part of Thor's statement. Toni sighed.
"No Thor, 'friend Rogers' and I haven't had after-battle sex. That's not something we're accustomed to on Earth." Rhodey cracked a grin at Toni's discomfort. Thor, with a look like a scolded puppy, took a seat next to Clint.
It took Steve a while to finally talk to any of them. And when he did he had meekly piped up with, "What were you doing down in the shop all day?" Toni looked over, shocked out her little world watching Pimp My Ride with her legs strewn across Rhodey's. It made Steve suddenly desperate for them to have that kind of familiarity.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. I was actually making you a surprise. Come on, I'll show you." She said, swinging her legs off Rhodey and then standing. Steve turned off the stove, clearly having burned whatever he'd been making for lunch.
She led him into the elevator where he pressed button for the underground level that was her shop. As they relaxed, as the ride was a fairly lengthy one, Toni found herself leaning back against Steve's chest, breathing him in. His arm was suddenly over her shoulder and he was interlacing his fingers with hers, swinging their hands slightly. The corner of Toni's lips tugged into a blissful smile. Sometimes, she thought, it was the little touches, the easy way he held her or smiled with her that reminded her that happiness is real.
The doors slid open, revealing her shop which was cluttered and messy. Steve let her led the way out, their fingers still intertwined. Inside the shop was a mannequin sporting a suit. It wasn't just any suit either, it was a modified Captain America suit. Steve looked at it, not quite comprehending what it was really. Toni glanced from Steve to the suit a few times. It was all navy blue and now resembled the original suit more, in the sense that both had a very industrial, bulky feel to them.
Toni waited expectantly as Steve took in the suit. There was silence.
"Why?" He mumbled. Toni looked a little shocked.
"What do you mean why? You needed a new suit so I made you one." She said. Steve looked over at her, catching her expression,
"No! No, don't get me wrong Toni, I like it! I really do but it's just a little bit... Why'd you really make it?" He asked, turning back to the suit. She chewed her lip for a minute and then turned her gaze to the suit.
"Your file kind of freaked me out, I couldn't stop thinking about it so I made this. It's a carbon fiber weave design I created last night. Jarvis and I woke up early to start construction. And the star and shoulder stripes are lightweight titanium so there's extra protection there." She said, sitting down on a toolbox. "I didn't really mean to overreact but I couldn't stop thinking 'What if Steve got hurt in a fight' and that if you did I sure as hell wouldn't sleep again. I'm kind of relying on you now big guy." She sighed. Steve sat down next to her, bumping shoulders like he'd seen her do to Rhodes.
"I like it." He whispered. She turned her head to look at him. Their faces were inches away and their eyes were locked together. "I'm relying on you too, you know. I sleep pretty awful without you and you've kind of grown on me." He said. She tried to force back the grin that was playing with her lips.
STSTSTSTST
Three weeks to the day since Toni and Steve had made it official and it still made Nat gag whenever they were near each other. Of recent they'd grown annoyingly close and no longer tried to conceal their relationship. Now you'd walk into the living quarters and see Steve whispering something in Toni's ear that would make her crack up and Clint would just pout because he didn't know what it was. Or Nat would do her regular morning wake-up walk through the tower and she'd discover Steve and Toni holding each other in their slumber. But for Nat, the most annoying thing was when they used the living room couch as a napping place.
It was Friday Night Movie Night. And for the Avengers, Movie Night was a big deal. To Toni it was the biggest deal in the world. She avidly believed, while not outright showing it, that the Avengers were a family and families have Movie Nights. Every night it alternated 'Movie Pickers' which was a very prestigious position decided by who won the previous nights hardcore Board Game Championships. The games generally rotated between The Amazing Labyrinth, Settler's of Catan, Risk and finished with Apples to Apples. Suffice to say Nat herself generally never got to pick movie. Tonight, much to everybody's surprise though, she was picking. She'd never done awesome at the other games but she almost always won Risk.
Apparently Toni had psyched herself up all day for Movie Night and then crashed. Steve, after a long day attempting to help Clint shop for groceries, was also tired. Nat, searching their cabinets for a movie two hours in advance, walked into the living room to find Toni curled up against Steve. Nat hissed slightly in attempt to avoid walking into Steve's stretched out arm. Clint looked up from his book, a new one since yesterday's hadn't lasted long.
"Ack, their like cats..." She grumbled, pausing to glare for a moment. "It's disgusting." It wasn't quite contempt in her voice, a kinder version but close. Clint smiled and then flicked his chin at the cabinet full of movies.
"Which one are we watching tonight?" He asked. She shrugged. Moulin Rouge was out because she'd cried at the end. The movie adaptation of Anna Karenina was awful so that was out too. She sat down on the floor, folding her legs crisscross-applesauce style and rocked back and forth. The silence in the room made Steve and Toni's breathing fairly loud. Nat grinned as she riffled through Bruce's collection of animated Disney movies (his favorite being Lilo and Stitch) and pulled out The Princess and the Frog. She held it up for Clint to see. Clint nodded in approval
"Yeah sure. It's a pretty good one if we're going to watch a Disney movie." He said. Nat looked up at him and sighed.
"I don't know if he's told her yet," She motioned to Steve and Toni. "But S.H.I.E.L.D wants him to start work with a hit team basically. It'll keep him busy and apparently I'm on it too. We're supposed to be at a briefing meeting tomorrow to get more information." She said. Clint nodded and motioned for her to sit as he scooted over. Nat, smirking, joined him.
"Are you okay going out again?" He asked, suddenly the serious side of Clint showed. She nodded.
"Yes, yes I am Clint. But thank you." She pecked him on the cheek, that friendly way that she was used to doing.
"You don't want me to request to join, do you?" He knew her too well too think she'd say yes but he had to say it. Maybe just so she knew he was there, maybe not. She looked over at the sleeping couple on the couch.
"Nah, it's not that big of a deal. I'll be home for dinner, I swear." She said, feigning the teenage girl. Clint wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close.
"Want to pull a prank on them?" He muttered to her, grinning.
'...You're my mission.'
