Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or any other character in this story.
A/N: This is one of those stories meant to play around with. I'm not taking this fic anywhere specific, and honestly have very little to no idea where I'm going with it. I hope you stick around and help me have fun with it, though.
Gossip
Chapter 2: Badmouthing
"Ow! Ow, Hermione! Let my ear go before you rip it off."
"Ronald Weasley," Hermione barked as she tugged Ron's ear harder. "You and I are going to have a long discussion about what you've been telling your brothers, so I'd shut up and start preparing my case if I were you!"
"Preparing my case? What am I, a prisoner about to be tossed in front of a Judge?"
"I'm about to be the Judge, jury, and Executionerif you don't tell me the truth."
Ron was about to respond, but was prevented from doing so when Hermione suddenly stopped, opened a door, and forcibly shoved Ron in by the ear. After stumbling and catching himself on a chair, Ron had a moment to notice that they were inside the charms classroom when Hermione began shouting. "Now, whydo your brothers think that you and I have had sex? I distinctly remember our romantic moments, and we have never done anything more than kiss."
Ron's face became as red as a tomato when he answered. "I never said anything about doing thatwith you to anyone. Where is this coming from, anyway?"
Hermione scowled. "Stop it, Ron. You know exactly what I'm talking about."
"Hermione, I swear that I never told anyone that we were having… doing… that!"
"Oh, then why did your brothers send you some Firewhiskey since you 'became a man,' huh?"
A flustered Ron grabbed a chair and moved to sit down in front of Hermione, who was rigidly standing with both arms folded in front of her. "Hermione, if you're going to accuse me of these things than can we at least sit down and talk about it?"
Hermione snorted and reluctantly fetched a chair to sit down. "Hermione, I never told my brothers that we- that we, you know, did that. They sent me the Firewhiskey because I finally gained the nerve to ask you to become my girlfriend."
"Then why did Harry tell me that you were bragging about sleeping with me?"
"I did not!" Ron hissed. "Dean was joking around about how I'd be in your pants soon enough because 'it's the quiet ones you have to watch out for.' I was a bit drunk at the time, so I just ran with the joke. Everyone there knew that I was being sarcastic!"
"Stop lying, Ron." Hermione hissed. "Harry wouldn't lie to me about something like this. If what you said is true, then why did you say that I squeak when I- when I-"
"Because you do squeak when I actually manage to surprise you with a kiss. I was talking about how hard it is to surprise you and why I like to do it. I wasn't talking about anything involving, you know, sex."
Hermione would have laughed at Ron whispering the last word if she wasn't so upset. "No, Harry wouldn't lie to me. You are-"
"Telling the truth," Ron interrupted. He reached out and wrapped his hands around Hermione's before gently squeezing them. "Hermione, I really care about you. I wouldn't risk that with some loose lips and false claims. I know how word travels in this school."
"But…" Hermione pulled her hands away from Ron and began pacing through the room "If you didn't claim anything of the sort, then why would Harry tell me that you did?"
"I don't know," Ron shrugged. "Maybe he was just in a bad mood today or… oh yeah."
Hermione stopped pacing and turned to Ron. She raised an eyebrow while staring intently at her boyfriend. "Oh? What does 'Oh' mean?"
Ron tried to act nonchalant. "It's nothing, really."
"It obviously cannot be 'nothing,' or you would have told me what 'nothing' was already."
Ron shrugged and sat down once more, while seeming to curl in on himself. "Well, I might have angered Harry into goading you yesterday. Not purposefully, mind you."
Hermione's stance became, if possible, more scrutinizing than before. "How did you get him to become angry at me?"
"Well, I didn't get him angry at you per se." Ron began rubbing the back of his head. "It- it's a bit complicated."
"Is it? Then you'll just have to tell me everything while getting straight to the point, then."
Ron quailed under Hermione's intense glare. "Well, after Harry and Ginny broke up and we got together, I teased him by saying that neither of us could keep a girlfriend while the other had one. Basically, that one of us would always be single while the other was dating. Last night, after having a few drinks, Harry admitted that he would like to find a girlfriend before graduation…"
"You know," Harry said as he held a shot of Firewhiskey between three fingers. "I haven't had a real relationship while at Hogwarts. Cho was my first girlfriend and we never really did much together, and Ginny and I were together for such a short time that I don't really think it counts."
"Of course it counts," Dean slurred after knocking back a shot. "If no ones else was with 'err, than you's were dating."
Seamus chuckled at Dean's slurring before knocking back his own shot. "Yeah, mate. You were officially dating Ginny, so you've got no problems saying that you bagged a girl at Hogwarts."
Ron growled for a moment before throwing in his two cents. "I don't like anyone saying that they've 'bagged' my sister, but they've got a point. You have had a relationship while at school."
"But it's not the same," Harry whined. "I want a real relationship where I don't have to worry about having to deal with fights over dead friends and worrying about whether Death Eaters will destroy my relationship."
"Harry, don't worry about that." Ernie Macmillan responded. "You-"
"Wait," Hermione interrupted. "I thought that your party was just filled with Gryffindors. Ernie is a Hufflepuff. Who else was there?"
"I don't remember," Ron shrugged. "We had a lot of whiskey and it did start as just Gryffs, but a bunch of people started showing up because Seamus and Dean had invited them. I don't remember exactly who showed up."
"Harry, don't worry about that." Ernie Macmillan responded. "You've already defeated You-Know-Who, so that kind of stuff is behind you now. You can choose any girl in Hogwarts now and be sure that, as long as they're single, they will say yes and you won't have to worry about either of those things."
"No," Ron blurted. "No he can't. Harry can't break the trio-dating rule, so he's doomed to a bachelor's life."
Ernie blinked a few times. "What the bloody hell are you talking about?"
"The trio-dating rule. 'All three members of the golden trio can't be in a relationship at the same time.' Think about it; Harry, Hermione, and I have never been seeing someone at the same time. One of us is always single, therefore Harry can't date until after Hermione and I break up."
"Do you really believe that?" Harry asked. "Doesn't your dating Hermione break the rule somehow, since you're both in one relationship so I can have the second out of three?"
"No," Ron answered. "No, no, no no no, no. No. I am in a relationship right now, with Hermione, and she is in one with me. That's two relationships."
"That's drunk logic," Harry countered.
"It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."
"Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer.
"…And that's why I think Harry told you what he did." Ron concluded.
Hermione was silently fuming as she thought about what she had just learned. "Ron, where the hell did you get such a monumentally stupid idea? Why did you argue with anyone, especially Harry, using such an idiotic theory?"
"It was just a joke, Hermione." Ron explained. "I didn't expect him to think that I was serious or anything; I was just fooling around."
"That's still insulting, Ron. It is insulting to him and to us. Honestly, that has to be the dumbest thing that ever came out of your mouth."
"Oh, really?" Ron asked. "If you think I'm so dumb, then why do you even spend any time around me?"
"It's because I like you, Ron." Hermione answered. "And because you usually don't do anything like this without immediately realizing how much of a prat you are being. Now come on."
Hermione grabbed Ron's arms and pulled him out of his seat. Stunned, Ron immediately asked. "Where are we going?"
"We are going to find Harry," Hermione explained. "And once we find Harry you are going to apologize for being a buffoon."
"But what about breakfast?" Ron grumbled.
Hermione huffed as she pushed Ron out of the classroom. "Then you had better hope Harry hasn't finished eating breakfast, if you're hoping to get any."
Harry never figured out how he got into these situations. Harry understood that fate loved to play games with him, but to go from being accused of dating Susan Bones to be sitting scandalously close to her – alone, in the Room of Requirement – while looking over a paper? Well, Harry was sure that it wasn't a coincidence.
Harry fidgeted slightly as Susan slid closer to him, the side of her breast pushing into his arm. Harry could swear that he could probably count exactly how many threads of cotton was being pushed onto that spot, given how aware he was of the sensation. "Well, Harry," Susan breathed into his ear. "What do you think... of my paper?"
"Well," Harry gulped. "It certainly is a very nice paper." Harry shivered as he felt Susan's arm wrap around his back so that her hand could rest lightly on his other side. He shook his head slightly so that he could focus. "But, I found a couple of small problems."
"Really?" Susan smirked as she rested her chin on his shoulder. She could feel his face get warmer by such close contact. "Well, what mistakes did I make? Are they easy to fix?"
Harry cleared his throat and shifted down the bench, causing Susan to pout as he moved away from her. He moved so that he was facing Susan before continuing. "Yeah, you wrote a paragraph on how you have to think the spell every time you cast wandlessly, when you are only supposed to do that for spells that don't directly effect people like creating a portkey, and most kinds of shields. For more effect-based magic, like the jelly-legs jinx and most attack spells, it's better to also visualize what is going to happen. The spells are more effective that way then if you merely think the spell name."
Susan smiled as she listened to Harry. She couldn't tell if he was nervous by her signals, or if he was just naïve, but she was determined to snag Harry for herself before the day was done. "Is that the only problem?"
Harry nodded. "Aside from some nit-picky things, yeah. That's the only major problem. Everything else is just grammar and a couple of sentences that don't make sense, given how you've worded them. All of it is really standard."
"I guess I should have proof-read the paper once more before showing it to you." Susan tried to slide next to Harry again, but he stood up and moved to sit on the other side of the table. "What's wrong? You don't like sitting next to me."
"It's not that," Harry waved off, his cheeks still slightly tinged with red. "It's just that I work better when I sit across from my study partners."
"You always sit next to Hermione when you study." Susan pointed out.
"Yeah, well, Hermione likes to look over peoples shoulders when she is helping people, and Ron always goes berserk after a half hour whenever he sits there. It's easier for everyone if I sit next to her. I can deal with her hissing in my ear whenever I bungle something in my potions essay."
"She doesn't seem to be correcting you much nowadays, though." Susan noted as she leaned forward, crossing her arms on the table. This allowed her to study Harry more closely, while giving him a chance to notice her considerable bust. "Why is that, I wonder?"
Harry smiled and leaned back, taking off his robes to reveal a tight blue shirt and jeans, and placed his hands on the back of his head. The fact that this stretched his shirt to accentuate his muscles did not go unnoticed. "Well, after I defeated Voldemort I stayed with an acquaintance in France so that I can recuperate. I received some tutoring in my worst subjects, like Potions and the History of Magic, while I was there."
Susan stopped ogling Harry for a moment to ask, "Who was this acquaintance?"
Harry shook his head. "I stayed with a friend's mother for the summer. That's all I'd prefer to say about that."
"Oh come now, Harry." Susan giggled. "Your life to date has been far too well documented at this school for you to be keeping secrets now. Now, who do you know that is from France, or who has a connection to France?" Susan cupped her face with her palm and began to tap a finger on her cheek. "Well, the first and most obvious choice would be Fleur Delacour." Harry's eye twitched, and Susan gasped. "Oh my god, you were staying with Fleur Delacour's family."
Harry dropped his arms. "Yeah, well, I'd rather no one knew where I was this summer. If people found out that I was staying with a family that includes a Veela, two half-Veela daughters, and currently no male family members, then they might begin to accuse me or them of committing vile acts over the summer."
"Would they have any basis in truth?" Susan inquired.
Harry glared. "The Delacour's have never done anything that I would ever consider vile, Susan, and neither have I."
Susan was taken aback by his cool tone. "I meant no offense, Harry. I was just curious as to what your relationship with the Delacour matriarch was, now that she's probably looking for a new mate and you were with her all summer."
Harry nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry for the tone I took with you, Susan, but Apolline and I get along very well and I'll not have anyone insulting her. Every time someone hears that I was staying at the Delacour estate, they assume something perverse happened. Mrs. Delacour was a wonderful woman, and it hurts to think that everyone thinks of her in such a perverse manner. It wouldn't even matter if anything happened or not anymore. Just the mere fact that people suspect her just because she's Veela…"
Harry looked down at his hands, not knowing what else to say. Susan reached across and took one of his hands in hers. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply anything. I was just curious about your summer."
Harry smirked. "Yeah, you've been really curious about me recently. You've been around more often since the beginning of the school year." Harry raised an eyebrow at Susan. "Why the sudden interest?"
Susan absently licked her lips and moved around the table to sit by Harry. Susan took his hand in hers again before speaking. "Well, I've always thought you were a great guy, Harry. You are really smart and athletic, and you are really helpful. I just wanted to get to know you better."
Harry chuckled for a moment. "That's what the daily Prophet and Witch Weekly are for. Why are you bothering to hang around me, really?"
Harry slipped his hand out from between Susan's and placed it around her waist. As Harry settled himself into her side, he used his other hand to cup her face and redirect her eyes toward his. "Harry," Susan breath became harsher as the two began to lean slightly toward each other.
However, before either could move another centimeter, Hermione burst into the room with Ron in tow. Harry and Susan burst apart so fast that anyone who was watching them would have thought that they had apparated. "Harry," Hermione cried as she dragged Ron over to their table. "There you are! I've been looking all over for you. Ginny and Lavender said you'd be in the library, and when you weren't there we began searching for all of your usual study areas."
Harry fought to control his embarrassment at nearly being caught kissing by Hermione. "We decided that it would be better to go somewhere other than the Library to talk about our Defense homework."
"Hello, Hermione." Susan growled, a bit miffed that neither of the intruding Gryffindors acknowledged her presence. "How nice of you to stop by. We were in the middle of studying, so can this wait until later?"
"That didn't look much like studying to me," Ron grumbled.
Harry glared at Ron while Hermione elbowed him in the gut. "Seriously Ron, we're here because you've already stuck your foot in your mouth once. Don't stick it in there again. Now do what we came here to do."
Ron nodded and stepped forward. "Look Harry, I'm sorry I was a prat yesterday and said all that stuff about the 'trio dating rule.' It was a bunch of Dragon dung and I'm sorry."
Harry smiled. "Don't worry about it, Ron. I didn't really care in the first place. I knew you were just joking."
Hermione smiled for a moment before coughing and becoming serious once more. "Alright, now I would like for you to apologize, Harry."
Harry's eyebrows furrowed and his smile disappeared. "What for? What did I do?"
"You lied to me about why they were throwing the party." Hermione announced.
"What?" Harry's brow furrowed even more. "I didn't lie about anything that happened last night."
"Harry, please stop. Ron told me that the party was about our becoming a couple, and not about us allegedly having sex."
"But that was what the party was for. I read Fred and George's note on the crate of liquor. It said, 'To Ron, for getting into the Bookworm's knickers.'Ron wouldn't shut up about it all night!"
"That's not true!" Ron stated. "I never said that I slept with Hermione."
"That's true," Harry conceded. "You never said 'Hermione and I had sex,' or 'I got into her knickers.' However, you did tell everyone all about how she acts in bed."
"That's drunk logic," Harry countered.
"It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."
"Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer.
"Oi, Harry, you're sounding pretty confident there." Seamus piped in. "That's pretty hard to believe, considering Ron's already gotten so far with our dear Granger."
"Yeah mate," Dean added. "You really think you can break that up? Anyone who can make a girl howl like Ron did Hermione must be doing something right."
"She doesn't howl," Ron corrected. "Hermione's a squeaker."
"Woo," Seamus cried. "A squeaker, huh? I never heard of that one. How does it work?"
Ron laughed for a while before saying anything. "Something like this isn't like fixing a broom, Seamus. There are subtleties to it all."
Dean fell off of his chair laughing. "What do you know about subtleties, Ron?"
Ron tried to glare at Dean, but failed miserably. "Look, it works like this; you do everything right and then you hear one squeak, then two, and then next thing you know all of your senses are overloaded."
Harry watched Hermione's reactions as she glared at Ron so furiously it was a wonder that he didn't burst into flames. "Need I continue, or can you go back to berating your boyfriend away from here?"
Ron stared at Hermione with his hands over his heart. "Hermione, I swear to you that I did not say any of that! This is what happened."
"That's drunk logic," Harry countered.
"It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."
"Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer.
"Oi, Harry, you're sounding pretty confident there." Seamus piped in. "That's hard to believe, since Ron's already worked so hard to be with Granger."
"Yeah mate," Dean added. "You really think you can break that up? Anyone who can make a girl howl like Ron did Hermione must be doing something right."
"What are you talking about?" Ron asked.
"Oh come on, mate." Seamus cried. " Word around the grapevine is that you've been makin' the beast with two backs with Hermione. Is she as wild as they say the quiet ones are?"
Ron turned as red as a tomato, and was too stunned to say anything. "I wouldn't jump into a relationship like that, you sods. Something that serious isn't like fixing a broom, Seamus. There are subtleties to relationships that you Have 'ta grasp first."
Dean fell off of his chair laughing. "What do you know about subtleties, Ron?"
Ron tried to glare at Dean, but failed miserably. "Look, it works like this; as much as I think about it, I'm not going to do something like that with Hermione just yet." A smirk came upon Ron's face. "It doesn't hurt to dream, though."
"That's what happened!" Ron pleaded. "I swear, that is what I remember happening."
"That's what you think," Harry said in a false-sotto voice. "Where there are one million eyes, there are one million stories. I can tell you that, just like Ron, what I remember is what I remember to be the truth."
Hermione's eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms. "Well, there may be a million versions of this story, but there is one universal truth. So, we're going to pick everyone's head until we figure out what really happened."
The next thing that Harry knew, Hermione's hands were wrapped around his and Ron's arms, and Hermione was rushing out of the room with them in tow. As Susan sat alone in the Room of Requirement, there was only one thing that she could think to say. "Goddamn it, if I'd have stuck to the plan then Harry would have stayed. I'm going to killHermione for ruining my chance later."
A/N: A special thanks to psykotikwitch for getting me to get off my ass and write this chapter.
Edit 5/22/2018: I just fixed a couple of minor grammar mistakes, Nothing major, really.
