In which Victor had to face reality.


If he could trade his fame and fortune for the sake of bringing back his Yuuri, he would. If he could make everyone forget about him being the living legend in the world of skating just to have his beloved alive, he would. Victor wanted nothing more in life but one. And that one was Yuuri Katsuki. The man who changed his life. The man who covered the dark skies and painted rainbows on them instead. The man who made everything beautiful again. Without him, everything would turn hideous again. And Victor didn't want that.

He'd like to imagine that he was just in a field of flowers with his love, chasing him and making flower crowns under the tree. Yuuri would sure look beautiful with the billions of flower crowns he could make. And Yuuri would still be smiling under the sun, laughing as he proceeds to kiss Victor with his power.

If the world were like that, then Viictor would never want to leave it.

If it were nothing but a child's mere dream, then Victor would never want to wake up.

He just wanted to be with Yuuri forever.

The faint rays of the sunlight tickled his eyelids as the Russian slowly opened his eyes. He wasn't in his room nor in Yuuri's. The first thing he saw was a while ceiling. It looked too plain. He wanted someone to actually paint it just like what Yuuri did with his life. If so, then maybe waking up wouldn't be so bad for other people. Victor knew that everyone deserved to wake up with a good mood.

His head tilted to see a large, glass window and the rays of the sun entering the room. He squinted his eyes as his eyes made his way to his left. Victor's eyes widened when he finally saw the dextrose and the I.V. bag hanging on its metal rack.

"I'm...in a hospital?"

He blinked. "Yuuri...?"

But all he heard was nothing but loud silence.

Why was he in the hospital, anyway?

All of a sudden, all the memories came back to him.

The bus.

The street.

The accident.

Yuuri.

Victor started shaking. Tears began to form from the corner of his eyes as he recalled the blood that swam on the asphalt road. He bit his lips and tried to cover his ears as he recalled his scream mingling with the passengers' and the driver's. And he clenched his fist as the thought of murdering that driver came into him. How could he not even see that he ran over someone who crossed the pedestrian lane? Isn't doing that against the law? Was the driver just stupid? He probably was. If he wasn't, then he could still be laughing with Yuuri at the seashore of Hasetsu. It was his stupidity that led things to this. And Victor wanted to curse him for the rest of his life.

He couldn't feel any air coming into him. His head hurt. More tears came out as his world slowly turned black again.

Victor heard the door open and footsteps approaching. Half a second later, he felt a pair of shaking hands rubbing his back.

"You idiot! Breathe! Breathe! Calm down! You don't want the nurses panicking again!"

And he managed to. Victor turned to see his comforter's face.

"Y-Yurio?"

Yurio sighed in relief. Victor could see that the teenager was too exhaused to even get infuriated. It wasn't like him to stay silent and keep calm. The silence has went on for a minute beforr Victor finally asked.

"Where's Yuuri?"

Yurio looked down before another round of tears came in. He frowned and bit his lip, as if he was trying to stop himself from crying. But it seemed that no matter what he did, he couldn't. Yurio fell to his knees and cried as much as he could.

Victor felt himself shaking again. "I-Is he...?"

"Dead. He's dead."

His whole world suddenly spun as the realization came into him.

Dead.

Yuuri Katsuki is dead.

He couldn't believe it.

Once again, he lost another person he loved.

But this time, it was someone he couldn't live without.

And just like magic, the world turned ugly and monochromatic once again.

As the sun began to settle into its horizons, Victor could only hope that it was just another nightmare. He could only hope that he would wake up next to his beloved drooling in his sleep.

But this was reality.

And he couldn't do anything about it.


The news of the skater's death spreaded like wildfire across the world. Everyone came to Hasetsu to pay their respects. The wake was more or less something public. But at night, it became private for the sake of his friends and family to find comfort in each other.

Yurio and Victor, however, were affected the most.

Victor couldn't even look at Hiroko. But Hiroko understood.

"You know, it's not your fault,"Hiroko started when she sat across the two. Victor wasn't his usual self ever since that day. He never talked to the media and the others as well. The only time he spoke was when he was with Yurio as he was his only security blanket as of the moment. But all that came out of his mouth were blames and regrets. And the same went with Yurio. Yakov tried to act like a proper father by comforting Yurio. But there was nothing he could do. At that moment, Victor was his only comfort zone. Neither could even skate anymore. It was as if the rink died along with Yuuri.

"It is,"Victor said, his voice hoarse. He laughed before continuing, "I should have been more careful with your son. I'm sorry. I am not worthy to be your son-in-law anymore or even be welcomed in this family."

"Vicchan, as a mother, I want to tell you that no one expected that to happen. Not the driver. Not the passengers. Not Yuuri. And not even you. It just happened. Nobody can be blamed for this."

"They say that things happen for a reason, right?"

Hiroko nodded.

"If so, please tell me. Why did it have to be Yuuri?"

Hiroko looked down, a stream of tears running on her cheeks. "I don't know either."

"Then it's probably my fault."

Hiroko gritted her teeth and frowned, fury boiling up her blood. "Have you even considered Yuuri's feelings about this?!"

Everyone froze and looked at Hiroko as she stood up and looked at Victor. Mari gulped and Minako frowned as well. Victor started shaking, along with Yurio.

"Yuuri doesn't want to see you like this! He doesn't want to see you blaming himself because if so, then...then he would be blaming himself for what's happened to you! You don't want him to blame himself for everything, right? Well he feels the same towards you! If you keep blaming yourself, then Yuuri would feel very bad!"

But, to Victor, that message meant something else.

"I see. Well, I guess I'll have to go out for a while."

Yurio looked at him. "Oi! Are you deaf?"

Victor chuckled before walking out. "I'm sorry to disturb you. I'll just go away."

And he left without another word.


Victor stood at the Hasetsu seashore, looking at the gold ring on his finger.

"It's my fault,"he whispered. "I'm sorry, Yuuri. I can never protect you."

Suddenly, a bright light came into Victor's eyes. He couldn't breathe nor speak.

Victor passed out.

And when he woke up, he found himself on Yuuri's bed with Yuuri beside him.