Author's Note: Okay so here is the newest part! Wow I got this out pretty fast. Now because of the whole new fan fiction rules about explicit content, I was wondering, should I just continue to post this story on here, or make a new blog on Tumblr for my slash stories? I would include Perfect Disaster in the blog as well, I just don't want any of my stories to get removed or get banned from fan fiction for something I wrote. Please let me know what I should do, and tell me what you thought about this next part! I hope it wasn't too terrible!

Disclaimer: I own no rights to Big Time Rush or anything like that.


Chapter Two: Everything Changes

Kendall forced himself not to push his alarm to the floor. The ringing in his ears failed to subside even after disconnecting the obnoxious beeping. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and sat up in his bed groaning. It was the first day of his last year of high school, and he couldn't wait for it all to be over. To leave this little town he had always called home without looking back.

He shuffled out of bed and walked to the bathroom. Kendall showered quickly, shaking his hair dry and brushing his teeth before heading downstairs for breakfast.

"Hey Big Brother, today's the day huh?" his little sister Katie greeted him at the kitchen table. She had to hold back the giggle she had from seeing her brother's distressed face. He was not happy.

"Oh yeah, just another day of hell."

"Language!" Mrs. Knight yelled from where she sat at the table, giving Kendall a stern look. "Now hurry up and eat so you can drop Katie off at school. I don't want either of you to be late."

"Yes mom." Kendall muttered with a roll of his eyes. He placed a kiss to his mom's forehead as he passed by her and seated himself at the table. He inhaled his food rather quickly, urging Katie to hurry up so he could get to school. The sooner they left the sooner the day would end.

Walking out the door and to his car, Kendall couldn't help himself from glancing down the street at the Mitchell house. It had been three years to this day since he'd spoken to Logan, their friendship halting to a stop after that kiss. Kendall avoided Logan as though he were the plague, and Logan, being the timid, smart boy that he was, took Kendall's hint and never bothered to speak to him since.

It had been rough on Kendall, Logan was his best friend. He had always been there for him since they were five. They protected each other like brothers and had each other's backs. Then Logan just had to fucking kiss Kendall and ruin everything.

On the way to school Kendall played the "what if" game inside his head. What if Logan had never kissed him? Would they still be friends? Would they still have their rowdy sleep overs discussing girls with James and Carlos? Would they still support each other no matter what? Playing the "what if" game tore Kendall apart. He would never admit it but he missed his old friend.

After dropping Katie off at the middle school, Kendall drove into the parking lot, finding a decent spot before heading inside. There he met up with Carlos, figuring James was off with Logan somewhere. That was how it was now. Kendall continued to speak to James when Logan wasn't around, and Carlos became his new best friend. They bonded over hockey and girls, Carlos knowing to never mention the incident with Logan to Kendall.

How anyone at school ever found out about the incident, Kendall didn't know. He never told a soul, but didn't bother to deny the rumors that sparked up. He figured the truth was better than lying; although he couldn't help but worry about Logan and his coming out. Kendall knew it had to be tough for his friend, but the last thing he had wanted to do after that day was talk to him about it.

"You look worried." Carlos muttered as Kendall walked up.

"No, I guess I just have a lot on my mind. How is James doing?" Kendall asked Carlos.

"He's good. He's in the cafeteria with…well you know who."

Kendall sighed. "You can say his name Carlos."

"Oh okay then. Anyways they are together in there. Logan wanted to introduce James to the new kid who moved here over the summer. Logan claims they are 'just friends' but James thinks they are fucking."

"Oh so the new kid plays for Logan's team huh?" Kendall asked, curious about his old friend's love life, not that he needed to know the dirty gay details. Those should be kept behind closed doors.

"I guess so. Logan never stops talking about him it's really fucking annoying. But hey at least he doesn't talk about you anymore." Carlos looked at Kendall's face and knew he struck a nerve. "Oh shit I'm sorry I didn't mean-"

"It's fine Carlos. I don't have to worry about him. It's senior year. We've got hockey to worry about. Not to mention I need to go find Jo and catch up with her a bit, if you know what I mean."

"Don't brag about your precious little girlfriend. Unless, do you think she could help me out with my situation?" Carlos asked with a hopeful look in his dark, brown eyes.

"You know she doesn't talk to the Jennifers too much Carlos. She thinks their drama is annoying as shit, which by the way, it is. I don't know how you can stand her. But then again you've worshipped the ground she's walked on since we were freshmen."

"Can't help it man. I'm in love." A faraway look appeared in Carlos' eyes and Kendall knew the Latino was daydreaming yet again about his latest fantasy. Kendall shook his head at his friend's expression before his sight was blocked as two small hands covered his eyes.

"Guess who?" His girlfriend's voice Jo whispered in his ear.

"Hey babe." He mumbled, turning around to face her and giving her lips a long, slow kiss.

"Mmm…I've missed you Kendall." Jo snaked her arms up around his neck and smiled up at him. Kendall couldn't help but smile back.

"I know babe me too. Sorry hockey has been taking so much of my time up lately or else I'd be spending it with you."

"I know Kendall, it's okay. I made good use of the times you were gone."

This sparked curiosity in Kendall's mind. He raised an eyebrow at her and smirked. "What does that mean 'made good use'? You don't have some secret boyfriend hiding out anywhere do you?"

Jo giggled. "No of course not silly, there is only you." She poked his nose with the tip of her finger and stepped on her tiptoes to kiss his lips one last time before homeroom.

"That's what I like to hear. See you at lunch babe."

"See you." She waved before walking off to her class. Kendall turned down the hall, not shocked to see Carlos standing still with the same dazed expression on his face.

"Come on loverboy or we'll be late to class." Kendall tugged on the shorter boy's arm

"Ugh…how long was I gone for this time?"

"Five minutes man. Must have been some damn good fantasy."

Carlos licked his lips and groaned. "Oh it was."

"Dude you need to get fucking laid." Kendall said just before entering their first hour class together and taking seats next to one another. Kendall lowered his voice to a whisper. "Just make a move on her already. The worst she can do is turn you down."

"But it's me. There's no way curly Jennifer would want me." Carlos banged his head on the desk, causing a few students to turn their attention to the two of them. Kendall waved off his friend's action as a joke.

"Pull yourself together dude. Just hang out with her more. Invite her to the hockey games. Once homecoming rolls around, grow some balls and ask her to be your date."

"Easy for you to say, you have the perfect girlfriend."

Kendall smiled at his friend. "I do don't I? But anyways that's beside the point. If you don't make a move I'll make the move for you."

"No you can't!" Carlos yelled, this time earning attention from the teacher.

"I'm sorry Mr. Garcia what can't I do?" Mrs. Collins asked from the front of the room.

"Nothing nothing. Sorry Mrs. Collins, continue on." Carlos apologized to the teacher while listening to Kendall laugh softly next to him. "You fucking jerk. Don't talk to me." Carlos nudged Kendall with his elbow, giving the blonde a friendly smile before turning his focus back to the board, groaning at the end of class when they were assigned homework on the first day.

"So what class next?" Carlos asked Kendall once their homeroom ended. Kendall glanced at the schedule in his hand, reading what it said.

"Umm…Advanced Chemistry, and it's all the way on the other side of the building. See ya at lunch Los." Kendall hurried off down the hall, missing the look of horror on his friend's face as he left.

Kendall walked through the door to what would be his worst class of the year just as the bell rang. Taking a look at the room, Kendall let out an audible groan, causing most people within hearing distance to give him a weird look. Kendall trudged himself towards the only empty seat left open in the middle of the room, right next to none other than Logan Mitchell.

Kendall made it apparent by the way he slammed his bag down onto the lab table that he was upset with the seating arrangements, when really he was quite excited. He hadn't talked to his friend in so long, and he missed him. "You've gotta be fucking kidding me." Kendall muttered under his breath, but it didn't matter, Logan still heard him and shot Kendall a look. If looks could kill…

Kendall stared at his old friend for a moment, taking in his chocolaty brown eyes and perfectly gelled hair. Logan hadn't changed much in appearance since Kendall had last spoken to him; except now, the fact that Logan was gay practically radiated off of the smart boy's body in waves.

The teacher cleared her voice from the front of the room, causing both boys to jump in their seats, turning their attention towards her. "Good morning class. I hope you're all comfortable in your seats, and greet your partner. They will be your go to friend for the year, and welcome them as your lab partner."

Logan's hand shot up in the air and the boy began speaking before the teacher even motioned him to. "May I trade with someone, because I am in no way comfortable here."

The teacher, Mrs. Baker rolled her eyes. "What's so wrong with Mr. Knight? Is anyone willing to trade seats with Mr. Mitchell?" Mrs. Baker paused, waiting for anyone to react to her question. Instead everyone sat there, all eyes on Logan and Kendall with knowing looks in their eyes. They snickered at the two, before turning back to the teacher and shaking their heads. "Sorry, looks like you're stuck there." Mrs. Baker simply shrugged her shoulders, moving onto the next class topic and handing out the syllabus.

Kendall heard Logan sigh next to him, and Kendall couldn't help but imitate the brunette. It was about to be a long year.


"So babe, how are your classes?" Jo asked Kendall as she slid onto the seat next to him, placing a kiss to his cheek before making a start at her lunch.

"Don't ask him." Carlos butt in, knowing Kendall was still agitated about what had happened in his Chemistry class. The worst part was that Carlos had known the whole time they shared that class, and Carlos never even bothered to tell Kendall. He was currently giving the Latino the cold shoulder.

"Aww why babe? Anything I can do to make it better?" Kendall felt Jo place a hand on his knee and squeeze tightly, the contact not causing a change in his mood in the slightest. Kendall shoved her hand away with a sigh.

"No not really. Let's not talk about me…" Kendall looked up at Carlos, a smirk appearing on the blonde's face at his friend's frightful expression. "So did you hear? Jennifer and her boyfriend broke up over the summer."

"Kendall knock it off. We aren't talking about her." Carlos gritted his teeth, his grip tightening on the fork in his hand as he shoveled his lunch into his mouth.

"Yes we are. I also hear you happen to be in her Theater class. Did you at least talk to her?"

"A little yeah. We talked about our summers and that's about it. Nothing more."

Kendall slumped a little in his seat. "One day Carlos. Remember what I said earlier…if you don't make a move…"

"Seriously Kendall drop it. Or would you like to discuss your new lab partner in Chemistry?"

Jo's ear perked up at the mention of this, catching from Carlos' nagging tone that it was a girl. "Lab partner? Kendall who is she?"

Carlos laughed, taking a sip of his chocolate milk, watching as Kendall's expression bubbled with anger. "Oh she's not a girl, Jo. It's Logan, Logan Mitchell."

Jo gasped and lifted her hand now to rest on Kendall's shoulder. "Isn't that a good thing? Maybe you guys can become friends again. There's no way he's into you still after all these years."

"He's not, trust me. He practically begged Mrs. Baker to have our seats changed, but everyone else refused. I'm stuck with him for the rest of the year."

"Good."

"How is that good? We can't stand each other. There is no way we can last having a class together and actually being forced to talk to one another. It's not going to work." Kendall sighed, shoving his half eaten lunch away from him and rubbing his face in his hands.

"You never know buddy. It'd be nice for you two to be like you used to. You and Logan were attached at the hip before the incident. Plus if you happened to get along, James and I wouldn't be stuck in the middle between you guys all the time. I miss it being the four of us." Carlos spoke, shoving the last bite of his lunch into his mouth. I miss it too.

"We'll just have to see what happens, won't we sweetie?" Jo pinched Kendall's cheek awkwardly, smiling brightly up at him. Her cheeriness was really getting on his nerves.

"Whatever guys, if Logan and I have a say in things, we'll never be back to the way things were." Kendall stood up from the table, pressing a soft kiss to the top of Jo's head before walking off to his next hour of hell. He couldn't wait until school was over to hit the ice. He needed a good stress reliever, and hockey always did the trick for him.

The final bell rang signaling the end of the day. Kendall rushed to the rink, hitting the locker room and changing into his gear before meeting his coach out on the ice.

"Ready for another good year Knight?"

"Only the best." Kendall forced a smile at his coach Steve. He could talk to him about anything. Through the last few years Steve had become the only man in Kendall's life he could talk to. Without having Logan as a friend, Mr. Mitchell was a no go for Kendall to tell his problems to, so he discussed them with his coach. The man always seemed happy to help his star player.

"You alright there Kendall?"

"It's just been a long day. I need to take my mind off some things."

"Okay Knight, just don't harm any of the newcomers. We need all the help we can get if we want to make it to Nationals this year." The coach clapped a hand to Kendall's shoulder. "This is our year."

"Hell yes! There's no holding back Coach. We're going to kick all those other teams' asses. We were so close last year."

"I know Kendall, and with all those training and one-on-one sessions we had this summer, there's no stopping the team with you as our captain. Plus we have to keep an eye out for scouts. Every school in the country is going to want you on their team."

Kendall could feel the blush rise on his cheeks at his coach's words. "I'm not that amazing Coach."

Steve just shook his head and sighed. "You don't even realize how talented you are. Hell I won't even be surprised if the NHL recruits you."

Kendall smiled. His dream was to play for the NHL, for the Minnesota Wild in particular. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves Coach. For now let's just aim for that national championship."

Kendall could hear the other players now shuffling onto the ice behind him. "You got it Knight. Now come on let's practice."

Kendall loved the feel of gliding over the ice with a hockey stick gripped in his hand. He flew by the other players on the ice, finishing every drill before everyone else, causing Carlos to give him an incredulous look. Kendall shrugged at his friend. After spending practically his whole summer either at the rink or working at the market, Kendall had pushed himself to his limit, and boy was he fast. Even Steve was surprised by Kendall's speed and agility. After the team's normal scrimmage at the end of the practice, Steve was practically bursting with excitement.

"Like I told Kendall earlier boys, this is our year. We're gonna go all the way this time. Now you all are sweaty disgusting messes, go hit the showers."

Kendall raced through his showering, hurrying back to his car as he headed for the middle school to pick up Katie in time to take her home. He was glad she had tutoring after school or else he would have been late.

"Hey Big Brother how was school?" Katie asked while sliding into the front seat and strapping herself in.

"You won't believe who's my Chemistry partner Baby Sister."

Katie turned to Kendall with a questioning gaze. "Who?"

"Logan." Katie's jaw dropped. She knew all about the boys' fall out. When there was no one to talk to, Kendall confided in his sister, the girl had always been so mature for her age and was wise beyond her years. Plus hiding anything from her would just be a waste. Knowing Katie and her vindictive ways Kendall knew she'd find out anything if she really wanted to know.

"No way. How did it go?"

"Oh we still hate each other, that much is evident." Kendall reached for radio dial, adjusting the music and changing the station to Katie's favorite to try and subdue the subject, but Katie wasn't that easily fooled.

"You know that's not true. You don't hate him Kendall."

"Yeah I know, but he hates me."

"How do you know that?"

"Oh it's obvious Katie. Nothing's changed between us. Not since, well you know…"

"I thought you weren't ever going to bring that up again?" Katie asked, reaching to turn down the volume.

"Yeah well sometimes I do. Enough about me, anything interesting happen in that school of yours?"

"No. Everyone's still the same boring people they were last year. Although Lauren and I had some classes together so that was good."

"Sweet. Any homework?"

"Hell no! If any teacher would have given me homework I would be so pissed right now." Katie crossed her arms over her chest while Kendall pulled the car into the driveway and putting it in park.

"Don't swear, you know how much mom hates it. Now come on, unlike you I actually have homework."

"Well that sucks." Katie exited the car with Kendall hurrying after her into the house. Stepping out of his shoes he made his way to his bedroom and closed the door behind him. Kendall moved to his desk where his laptop was and started up his Anatomy homework, cursing Mrs. Collins for handing it out on the first day.


Three weeks had passed. If Logan could help it, he and Kendall would only speak a minimum of five words to each other a day. Instead Logan would just hand Kendall their work and expect him to do his part of it, without explaining to the blonde what he had to do. Since Kendall's mind was usually on other matters beside Chemistry, he would do a less than mediocre job , earning him almost a failing grade in the class after the first few short weeks.

"Kendall you can't just fail out of the class, you need it to graduate." Carlos told the blonde at lunch.

"You think I don't fucking know that? Plus without a C average I can't play hockey. I'm freaking out Carlos!"

"Dude, breathe, we just have to find a way for Logan to talk to you again…the only question is how?" Carlos stared off into space for a while, his face set on thinking long and hard about Kendall's dilemma.

"I don't want to talk to him. If he can't put everything behind us then fuck it. I'll just ask Mrs. Baker for a tutor or some shit like that."

"No shit he can't put everything behind him. You broke his poor little heart back when we were freshmen. One day you were his best friend, and suddenly you wouldn't speak to him. How do you think he felt?"

Kendall stopped and just stared open mouthed at his friend. He had never stopped to think just how badly his cold shoulder affected Logan. He just figured the smart boy had shrugged him off and forgotten about him. Kendall never considered the idea that Logan actually cared about him. He figured it was just a simple crush. Was Carlos right? Did he really break Logan's heart?

"Carlos…I didn't really…I didn't break his heart."

"Um yeah. You did. You were too preoccupied with hockey to notice. I can remember at least 8 nights of long three way phone calls between me, James and Logan. He cried to us over you Kendall."

Kendall felt as though he had been sucker punched in the gut a million times. How did he never notice it before? No wonder Logan hated his guts and wanted nothing to do with him. He was a terrible friend when Logan had needed him most.

"Fuck."

Carlos rolled his eyes. "Fuck is right. Hell I wouldn't be surprised if he still…" Carlos suddenly stopped talking, clapping a hand over his mouth to keep himself from talking.

"If he still what? Still had a thing for me?" Kendall felt a blush creep up on his cheeks and suddenly Carlos' living room was too warm for his liking. "There's no way Carlos. Like I said before he hates me."

"Whatever you say man, but you need to get yourself a tutor if he's not going to help you. We need you on the hockey team."

"Yeah okay I'll talk to Mrs. Baker about it first thing in the morning. If I don't pull up my grade to at least a C, Coach is gonna kill me."

"Oh fuck. You better get one amazing tutor." Carlos said, patting Kendall on the back.

"I know, Mrs. Baker will probably just have me work with the smartest kid in class. She has a soft spot when it comes to me."

"Thank God. Now enough school, hockey, Logan talk. It's time I kick your ass at Biohazard Battle Blast."

"You're on."

That night Kendall hung up the phone with Jo just before heading off to sleep like he did every night. Waiting for sleep to come Kendall laid there in his bed, tossing and turning. His mind wouldn't shut up. His subconscious was cursing him for never realizing just how much he had meant to Logan. And now he was paying the price. He missed his best friend; Logan was the one person Kendall could tell anything to. Logan had seen Kendall at his weakest, and never failed at being his friend. "This is so fucked up." Kendall whispered to himself in the dark before punching his pillow and trying to force his eyes to close so he could sleep.

In the morning Kendall had to fight to open his eyes. That was probably the worst night of sleep he had ever gotten in his life, only getting about a good 2 hours after remembering the last time he had checked his alarm clock that night. He shuffled out of bed, pulling on a pair of jeans and a plaid shirt and forced his way down to the kitchen.

"Wow you look terrible." Katie said to him with a smile.

"At least it's only one day and not every day like someone else I know." Kendall shot back, his voice hoarse from lack of sleep.

Katie opened her mouth to retaliate but Mrs. Knight held out her hand. "Enough! It's too early for fighting."

"It's never too early mom." Katie said, a smile playing on her lips. Kendall grabbed a granola bar from the cabinet and motioned for Katie to follow him out the door. "Why are we leaving so early?"

"I have to talk to my Chemistry teacher. Now hurry up or you're walking to school." Kendall heard Katie groan, but smiled when she followed him out the door like he'd asked.

"Have a good day Baby Sister!" Kendall called out the door as he dropped Katie. She waved back, but didn't say anything and kept walking. "Whatever…" He mumbled under his breath, heading towards the high school.

When he walked into Mrs. Baker's room everything was quiet. She sat at her desk, rifling through papers and assignments without even noticing Kendall standing before her. Kendall cleared his throat to make his presence known.

"Ahh Kendall, what can I do for you?" She asked with a smile, looking up at him over her glasses.

"My grade. I think I need a tutor in order to pull it up, and I can't participate in hockey unless I find someone to help me. I can't fail Mrs. Baker."

"I figured I'd see you coming for help about this. Why don't you ask Logan to help you, he is your partner after all, and he is the top student in class." Fuck, I should have known he would be that. Mr. Future Doctor never failed at excelling at everything he did.

"About that, he won't talk to me. We don't get along…" Kendall rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably, hoping she had a better solution other than asking Logan.

"So I've noticed. But based on your grades he's the only one who would really be able to help you. Try talking to him Kendall. He understands how important hockey is to you right?" Kendall nodded, letting her continue on. "Well then just tell him that. I bet you can put your differences aside for this."

"I hope you're right Mrs. Baker, thanks for that."

"Anytime Kendall. My door is always open if you need me." Kendall left the quiet classroom, heading out into the semi-filled hallways. He found Jo at their usual spot, giving her a quick kiss and telling her all about his predicament.

"Logan doesn't hate you Kendall, he'll help you."

"Why do you sound so sure?" Kendall asked her with a raise of his eyebrow.

"Because he's a good guy. Now I'll see you at lunch babe." With a swift kiss to his lips, Jo took off towards her first class while a war raged inside Kendall's mind on whether or not to approach Logan for help. He knew there was no way it could end well.

Walking into his Chem class Kendall had to remind himself how to breathe. He knew he was going to regret ever bringing this up to Logan, but his hockey career depended on it. Right now, his dreams rested in the hands of the ex best friend who hated him. Oh I'm so fucked.

"Hey Logan," Kendall started out cheerfully, trying to warm himself up to the brunette boy. Logan gave him a look that said 'what the hell do you want,' before awkwardly waving up and Kendall and returning to bury his head back in their Chemistry book.

"So how are you?" Kendall asked, his voice wavering under his nerves. He tried not to bounce his legs beneath the lab table, but he couldn't help it.

Logan shrugged, still paying Kendall no attention and barely recognizing the blonde sitting next to him, just like he did every day before.

"Do you still want to be a doctor?" Kendall heard Logan sigh, and shut his book with a loud thump before Logan turned to actually look at Kendall.

"What do you want?" Logan asked, an annoyed expression on his face.

"I…I have a favor to ask you…"

"No."

"What? You can't just say no! You didn't even hear me out!" Kendall said, his voice rising in a panic.

"I don't care."

"Come on Logie, please-" Logan banged his fist on top of their table hard.

"Don't call me that Kendall."

"What, I can't call you Logie? Fine whatever Logan. But seriously, just hear me out, I really need your help." Kendall was pleading now, desperate for the brunette to listen to him.

Logan sighed, looking Kendall in the eyes. For a moment Kendall thought he saw a flash of his old best friend, but it barely lasted a second. He had to tell himself it was just a flicker of the light. This boy wasn't the friend he used to have.

"What Kendall? What do you need?"

"Help. With this class. I'm practically failing and if I don't have a C average I can't play for the hockey team."

Logan laughed, turning away from Kendall and began to open his book again. "You're so stupid Kendall."

"I know, that's why I need your help. Please Logan? If I don't play hockey then a scout will never notice me and I'll never be able to play for the NHL. Please, I'm desperate." Kendall was begging, his hands clasped together in front of him with a pout on his lips. Just give him the puppy dog face, no one can deny this face.

"Fine. When and where and how many times a week?"

"Really? You'll help me? You're not shitting me right?"

Logan laughed for real this time. "No I'm not."

"But why Logan? I thought…well I thought you hated me?" Kendall asked, searching the smart boy's eyes for answers to his question. Logan's yes said more than Logan's lips ever would. Kendall prided himself on reading people so well.

"Oh I do, but I know it's your dream to play hockey…like your dad. I can't just let my friend's dream fail right?"

Kendall's shoulders slumped at the mention of his dad, but his mood instantly shifted at Logan's last sentence. Logan had called Kendall his friend. Friend. The word played on repeat in Kendall's mind. It took all of the blonde's control not to lift Logan up into a hug.

"Thanks Logan, you'll never understand how much this means to me. I'll let you know later on times and what not. Here's my number," Kendall ripped off a corner of his notebook and handed the sheet to Logan, "Just text me so I have yours. You're a life savior Logan."

Logan took Kendall's number from him without any hesitation, before flashing Kendall his trademark, lopsided grin; a grin that Kendall hadn't seen in a long time. He missed that grin.