I stood in the small hospital room, a hand lying on Rachel's forehead. I took her hand in my other one and squeezed it, feeling tears in my eyes.
"Silver?" Rachel said with a terribly weak voice. I knelt down by Rachel and hugged her gently, telling her, "It's ok, I'm right here." Rachel swallowed, looking at me as I hugged her, and she forced herself to speak again. "This was God's plan for me," she said quietly. "I'm… happy. I get to see my father again," she said, quieter. The doctor near us was working with the machine. They were taking her off the life support today, I was the last one to say goodbye; she had no chances of getting better, and Rachel was ready to go. But I wasn't ready to let her go yet, and I couldn't hold back the tears building up in my eyes. I clenched my fists around Rachel's blanket and brought my head down, the tears rolling down my cheeks, and I began blubbering like some kind of baby, in front of everyone else. Rachel shuffled under her covers and placed a frail hand on top of my fist, and I unclenched it, looking up at her with wet eyes. She gave me a sweet little smile, a tear rolling down her cheek, and she spoke to me.
"Please don't blame it on Him; He takes me when He feels like it," Rachel said quietly. I understood; I've been going to church with Riu for two weeks now; but I still didn't know why God had to take her so soon. I sniffled slightly and took her hand in mine, rubbing her knuckles with my thumb.
"I-I know… i-it's just, I'm going to miss you," I said, my voice wavering. I squeezed my eyes shut, while more tears squeezed their way out. "You've been my best friend forever! I-I can't just let you go!" My voice was loud, I didn't mean it to be. My voice was cracking left and right, but I honestly didn't care.
"Silver…" Rachel said calmly, and I calmed down, knowing that's what she wanted me to do. I looked into her blue eyes, those eyes that were normally beautiful, which now harbored no life. I remained silent, and took both her hands now. Rachel looked at the doctor next to her bed. "I'm ready to go," she said weakly to the doctor, who nodded, then she looked out at everyone else. They all looked at her with sad faces, but then Sonic stood forward. Sonic's head was down at first, but then he looked up to look in her eyes, and he spoke.
"You've been a great friend… to all of us," he said, looking back at everyone else. "Take a look, even the 'Ultimate Life Form' Shadow is tearing up," he said, smiling back at Shadow, who sat in the corner. Shadow looked up and quickly wiped at his cheek and turned his head away from them. Rachel chuckled slightly.
"Thanks guys," she said quietly to them, "I love you all."
"We'll see you soon," Sonic said to her, and he knelt down by her and gently hugged her. When he backed away again, Rachel looked up at the doctor and nodded. The doctor stroked Rachel's forehead, whispering "goodbye" to her, and he pulled the plug on the life support machine. I stared at Rachel, tears pouring down my cheeks, as I could just see her decaying in front of my own eyes. Her breathing became labored, and she turned her head to look directly at me. She pulled her lips into a smile and spoke, no louder than a whisper.
"I can see him… he's standing right there," she said weakly. I knew what she was referring to, and I bit my lip. Rachel looked back at me, smiling. "I love you… Silver," she said quietly. My heart tore in two, as the tears began to flow faster down my cheeks, and I replied.
"I love you too," I said. Rachel's grip on my hands weakened, and she stopped breathing. She continued to look at me, until her eyes slid shut, and she died with a smile on her face. I squeezed her limp hand in mine, staring at her, my lip quivering.
"I-I loved you too," I mumbled, and I kissed her forehead gently. I rested my face into my arms, right next to her, and began to cry. Everyone else, besides Riu, left by that time, but I didn't notice.
I sat there, crying onto her bed, until Riu rested a hand on my shoulder, and I looked up at him with wet eyes.
"I just can't believe she's gone," I cried. Riu extended his arms out to me, and embraced me in a hug, tears falling down his cheeks too.
"She's in a better place now," Riu said quietly. I sniffled and squeezed him tighter.
"B-But… I loved her," I said quietly. "She was my first love… and now she's been taken from me. Is this God telling me I'm destined to be alone?" I asked rhetorically. But Riu answered me anyways.
"Of course it's not," he said, looking me in the eye. "Silver, Rachel wouldn't want you to grieve for the rest of your life. Sure, she's gone now, but it definitely wasn't because God wanted to cause you pain. These things happen to people all over the world, every day." I hiccupped and wiped at my eyes.
"Then why does he do that? Why does he allow pain and suffering if he can do everything… if he loves us so much?" I asked. Riu took a moment to answer.
"Silver, I honestly think the reason He keeps us on this cursed planed, exposed to all that satin can dish out, is to test us… to see if we truly love him or not," Riu replied. "You see, God wants us to grieve, it's a natural reaction to death, but he doesn't want you to blame others… or Him… for the person's death. He wants us to learn from it, and grow in their faith. If you think about it, He gave up His one and only son, Jesus, who was completely pure from sin, to pay for the sins of all of us lowly sinners. He's made the biggest sacrifice of all." I sniffled and hugged Riu again. After a few silent moments of contemplating what Riu had said, I spoke.
"I don't blame Him," I said, "I-I'll be strong. I know I'll see Rachel again someday, and until I do, I'm going to love God for my whole life." Riu hugged me tightly back, and we both looked back at Rachel's body, tucked nicely into the bed. I let go of Riu and walked up to her bed. "See you in the future, my little angel," I said to her, stroking her bangs. I knew someday I'd see her again, when I too come to the gateway of Heaven. But until then, I felt the urge to go the church for awhile and talk to the pastor. I stood up and headed towards the door.
"Where you going?" he asked me.
"I'm heading up to church for awhile," I said to him. "Don't worry, I'll be back soon," I assured, and I took one last look at Rachel, before I left the room and headed down the hall.
As I drove to the church, a slideshow of Rachel and my greatest times flashed through my mind. The day we first met, as kids, the day I finally asked her out, our first kiss. My eyes began to water up a little again, but I squeezed the tears away.
"No tears, not now," I told myself. "I don't want to be sad anymore. If she's happy, then I'm happy too." The song "This is Home" by Switchfoot began to play in my head as I drove to the church. I concentrated on the lyrics.
"I've got my memories always inside of me
But I can't go back/Back to how it was
I believe you now/I've come too far
No I can't go back/Back to how it was
Created for a place I've never known
This is home
Now I'm finally where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I've been searching for a place of my own
Now I've found it/Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home
Belief over misery
I've seen the enemy
And I won't go back/Back to how it was
And I got my heart set on what happens next
I got my eyes wide/It's not over yet
We are miracles/And we're not alone
This is home
Now I'm finally where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I've been searching for a place of my own
Now I've found it/Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home
And now after all my searching
After all my questions
I'm gonna call it home
I got a brand new mindset
I can finally see the sunset
I'm gonna call it home
This is home
Now I'm finally where I belong
Where I belong
Yeah, this is home
I've been searching for a place of my own
Now I've found it/Maybe this is home
Yeah, this is home."
I pulled into the parking lot of the church and sighed, letting go of the wheel and turning off the car. I just sat there for a few moments, staring out into the parking lot. I swear, it felt like Rachel was sitting right next to me. But of course, I looked to my side and found nobody there. But my mind was telling me, "It's ok Silver, she's with Him now. She's fine."
Now I know/Yeah, this is home
I've come too far
And I won't go back
Yeah, this is home."
The end! *squee!* That was so cute... and sad :( Don't worry, Rachel will magically be alive again for the next story ^-^
Sorry it took so long to update, I nearly forgot about this one! Hope you enjoyed the story, and thank you for all the sweet comments! God bless you all, and good day!
