HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! Yes, it is I once again. Thought you were rid of me didn't you? Well no, since I now have a undying passion of hatred for that one review last time, I decided what the hell, I'm going to put as many chapters into this damn story as humanly possible. So many chapters! And by the time I'm done with this crap, you will want to stick hot needles into your eyes and ears to get rid of the pain!!. I will then proceed to incur so much pain into your life that you will want to die in the most sickly evil way possible……enjoy the show!
Chapter 2: interview with the madman….
Walking up the steps to the Hinata wasn't that hard for deadpool or keitaro, the two seemed to be used to the strenuous activity of walking a couple of miles. All the way, keitaro noticed some odd about his new friend. He was mumbling to himself about the situation….
"I'm getting this déjà vu feeling….like I was doing this before…man this is some weird shit……maybe I need to see a doctor".
"about what?".
"well kei-man, you ever get this feeling someone's watching you? Like when your looking at a book or talking to that psycho chick who kicked your teeth in?".
"now that you mention it….".
"well, its cause there are people watching…look!".
Putting a hand on the third year ronin's arm, Deadpool pointed to the woods next to him. He knew someone was watching their every move. But all Keitaro saw were tree's and bushes, nothing more.
"its just tree's deadpool".
"no no, they are there….watching….waiting, ill catch them someday!".
Falling to his knee's, the merc let out a scream while shaking his fists in the air.
"SOMEDAY!!!!!!!".
"……".
"YOU HEAR ME!!! ILL GET YOU!!! I KNOW YOUR THERE!!!!! ARRAUGH!!!".
"….you ok?".
"………………….yeah I'm good".
Getting up off his knee's, deadpool started back up the steps next to a now slightly confused keitaro. Making it to the tea shop that was run by haruka just a few minutes later. The two stopped for a second before spotting the woman with a broom in one hand and a ever present cigarette hanging loosely in her mouth.
"deadpool! Meet my au-".
A broom stick cracked keitaro across the top of his skull as he was making the introduction, her eyes went from her nephew to the man standing, snickering at the two.
"the name's haruka".
"kenny McCracken at your service".
She eyed him when she saw the smile appear under his mask, figuring out that was a lie the older woman then asked him a question.
"where you from kenny?".
"a little village outside of Warsaw Poland, my parents were Russian immigrants escaping the communist during the sixties. My father was a poor dirt farmer…".
"what did he farm?".
"dirt, yeah he wasn't too bright….my mom actually made most the money, she made stale bread for the junkies in the nearby village. It was me and fifteen other siblings, one became a crack addicted meth smoking dog breeder. The other thirteen died on the titanic and I became a doctor before I was burnt all over my body by Paris Hilton's blood while trying to find a cure for cancer. I'm not surprised her blood is very acidic, must be from constant make up usage and that damn rat dog she keeps in her purse….I of course went into mercenary work, because a scarred doctor doesn't do well with patients. I then met the love of my life, a girl named Sammy. She was a patient at a mental health facility and I was a scarred mercenary who broke into the nut house to steal and eat the pills they served to crazy people. After falling in love and snapping her neck on accident, I joined a crack team of guys who thought my skills were useful, until they ditched me here in Japan".
Haruka stared at him like he was in a restraint jacket, this guy was defiantly off his rocker. Looking to her nephew who wasn't phased by his rant at all, her eyes drifted back to the mercenary.
"….my name's deadpool by the way".
"don't worry aunt haruka, he was joking".
"no I wasn't".
"yes…you were".
"no I wasn't, seriously all my siblings died on the titanic! You don't think I wouldn't remember such a horrible day…..momma cried so much, her fat rolls shook like the ocean waves".
Keitaro sighed and began walking up the rest of the stairs, back to the apartment. A smiling deadpool behind him all the way. The building slowly came into view, which caused a whistle to come from the mercenary as his arms crossed.
"damn….what do you do for a living!".
"I'm just the manager here".
"……are you sure you don't sell drugs?".
"NO! are you crazy!?".
"yeah, but seriously who keeled over and gave you this place".
"my grandma left to go around the world, she wanted me to look after the place while she was gone".
Nodding his head in understanding, Deadpool began making his way to the entrance but was stopped before his hand reached the door handle.
"ok deadpool, I'm going to give you a warning…the girls here are a little well…"unstable".
"hmmm I see…..do any of them foam at the mouth or speak latin?".
"…..no".
"do their heads rotate one hundred and sixty degree's before they puke out pea soup?".
"no…".
"well what do they do?".
"motoko tries to cut you in half with her sword, naru punches and kicks you…..kaolla blows you up, kitsune flirts with you to get what she wants and….well shinobu isn't that bad".
"I see….you know bumper car's would solve all your issues, you should consider getting a few of those bad boys".
One of Deadpool's legs come up and kicks the door in, all while keeping eye contact with keitaro.
"wha!? Why did you do that!!!".
"we have to get inside before the sun goes down kei-man, the night is when the radioactive zombies hunt for brains…..and they spew radioactivity from their mouths….it wont kill you but it'll fuk your day up".
Looking away from the mercenary, keitaro sighed while looking into the doorway, seeing the familiar faces of the Hinata group come charging towards them. While keitaro just stared like a deer caught in the headlights of a truck…..
BWAHAHAHAHA how you like that you freaks? Eh? EH!?? Nah I'm just kidding, but I've got some more random crap coming so don't move from that damn seat….or else!. im kinda glad im redoing the whole damn thing, i wasnt as descriptive last time. so this should make people happy...or else!. i've been having afew brain storms in my head for the past few days, one involves a tenchi muyo and love hina crossover which ive never seen before in my entire life. maybe keitaro being a distant relative of tenchi and coming to visit him, or tenchi is a tokyo U student and is living with keitaro and the gang. but it would have double of the insanity of girls, not just the girls at the hinata, but the girls from the tenchi show thown in with them at the apartments...ah insanity, its soooo fun...and random! cant forget the random.
