Chapter 2

6:14 AM

When Neela heard him say the word 'rape,' she broke down. She knew what had happened to her. She had said it over and over again in her head, but she couldn't handle him saying out loud. She was trying her best to be strong for him, but she couldn't pretend any longer. She began to sob.

Neela pressed her head against Ray's shoulder, and he quickly climbed onto the bed with her. He wrapped his arms around her without causing her more pain. Her whole body began to shake and tremble. Ray just held her, leaning his head on top of hers. He whispered to her that everything was going to be alright, but he couldn't help but feel helpless. She was hurting, not from the physical pain, but from the emotions of it all, and there was nothing he could do for her but hold her.

After minutes of pure crying, she raised her head. Ray handed her a tissue from the tissue box on the nearby table. She dabbed her eyes with it, but even as she wiped away the tears that stained her face, more tears came.

"What happened, Neela?" He prompted. He took her hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"I don't know…I don't know if I can…"

"You can do this," he assured her.

She swallowed a hard lump that had formed in her throat. Her head was spinning, but she tried to pull herself together and remember everything that happened, even though she so desperately wanted to forget.

"I was walking to the apartment from the train," she stuttered. "Someone grab…grabbed me from behind and pulled me into this alley. I yelled. I yelled and screamed for someone to help me but no one came. He ripped my shirt and he pushed me to the ground. I fell on some broken bottles but I was so terrified…I didn't even feel it."

She cleared her throat. "I tried to crawl away…I tried to fight him but he was too strong. He hit me on the head," she pointed to the cut above her eye. "He hit me with something and I blacked out. I don't know for how long, but when I came to, he was on top of me and he was…." Her tears came stronger and faster. "When he was done, he…he thanked me and just left. He was just gone. And I didn't know what to do. I just picked myself up and came home."

Ray paused. He didn't know how to respond. How could he tell her that he wished he had been there to save her? How could he tell her that he would kill the person who had hurt her? How could he tell her that her story made him feel as if he had been shot through the heart?

"Neela, I'm…I'm so sorry," was all he could manage to say.

"You can't tell anyone. Please, Ray, I don't want anyone to know. I didn't even want to tell you."

He was struck by her words. How could she not tell him?

"You can tell me anything, Neela."

"Please, promise me you won't say anything," she stuttered, ignoring his remark.

"I promise," Ray agreed. "But, Neela, you have to go to the hospital."

She shook her head. "No."

"You need to get your injuries checked out and…"

"You said I was fine," she retorted.

"You are but…"

"I can smell him on me, Ray. I can smell his breath. I can feel his hands on me." Ray's blood boiled. "I can feel his lips on my lips. I can even taste him and I don't want to. I don't want to remember him, Ray. I just want it to be over. I just want to take a shower, and wash him off of me. I want to forget that this happened."

"I know. I know you want to forget but, Neela, forgetting isn't the answer. I don't need to tell you, that after your bathe, the evidence is gone. If you want to catch this guy, you have to have a rape exam done."

"I don't want to catch him."

Ray sighed. He had heard women like Neela tell him that too many times and he had given them the same speech that he was about to give Neela. Only, for the first time, he knew that his speech really meant something and he knew that she would be the most important person he'd ever tell it to.

"You're upset and you're scared and you're angry and you have every right to be. I understand how you feel but you're not thinking clearly. I know that you want to forget that this happened, and maybe you'll never change your mind but, Neela, if you don't go to the hospital now you lose your chance of ever being able to change your mind."

She wiped the tears from her eyes. "I can't go to County."

"Then we'll go to Mercy."

"Don't you have a shift in a few hours?"

Ray looked at the clock. Had it really been almost two hours since he had first been woken up by the slamming of the door? Had it really been almost two hours since he had felt his whole world turn upside-down?

"I'll tell them I have a twenty-four hour bug or something," he replied. "I won't let you go alone."

She nodded. "Okay," she whispered, unsure of whether or not she really meant it.

"Okay," Ray said. He stood. "I'll go get changed and we'll go together."

He headed for the door, but then stopped when Neela called out his name. He turned back towards her. She tried to turn her body to look at him but pain shot through her back.

"I don't think I can get dressed by myself," she admitted, not looking at him.

Without saying anything, Ray walked over to her dresser and pulled out a pair of comfortable pants. He then walked to her closet and found a large T-Shirt. He walked slowly back to the bed and stood in front of her. She clutched the sheet to her chest and tried to stand but she fell back onto the bed.

"Here, let me help you up," he offered. He placed each of his hands on her arms and helped her to her feet. The pain she felt was unbearable. Quickly, knowing that dropping the sheet would leave her topless, Ray walked behind her. He knew that she was as embarrassed enough as it was, and seeing her naked from the waist up would just add to her embarrassment. She dropped the sheet and Ray quickly slipped the T-Shirt over her head from behind. He slowly and carefully helped her put her arms through the arm holes. The fabric against her skin burned but there was nothing either of them could do for her. Ray helped her sit back down and he began to put her pants on as if he was dressing a porcelain doll. He lifted her slightly to get the pants over her hips.

"You okay?" He asked, noticing the pain on her face.

She nodded but didn't speak.

"I'll be right back," he said.

Although he didn't want to leave her, he quickly headed for his bedroom and threw on a pair of Jeans and a T-Shirt that he arbitrarily picked up off the floor. He wasn't even sure if it was clean. He grabbed his wallet and County ID badge off his bureau and shoved it into his pocket. He sat on his bed and picked up his cell phone from his bedside table. He disabled the alarm that was set to wake him up in just another half hour and then dialed County.

"County General," the voice on the line said. Ray recognized it as Frank's voice.

"Frank, it's Ray. I must have eaten something bad for dinner last night. I've got a pretty bad case of food poisoning. Tell Kovac that I won't be in today."

"Can't you ask Neela to cover for you?"

"We ate the same food," Ray lied. "We've both been up all night throwing up."

"Well, that must smell nice. Alright, I'll tell Kovac."

"Thanks Frank."

Ray hung up the phone and stood. He placed the phone in his pocket, along with everything else, and walked back to Neela's room.

"Are you ready?" Ray asked from Neela's doorway.

"I don't think anyone's ever ready for this," Neela replied, without looking up.

Ray approached her. She tried to stand, but couldn't find the energy. Sensing her struggle, he helped her to her feet and continued to hold onto her arm as they walked out of her room and out of the apartment.