Disclaimer: I think my witty comment generator is broken. Anyways, so not mine.
A/N: I don't have anything in particular to say about this one. Continuing in the tone of kinda pointless and silly ... I promise, the plot will get more plot-like later on. Enjoy chapter two. And please review!
Chapter Two
A week passed without much of any progress on deciphering the Manchurian Scrolls, and life continued on as usual for the Scoobies.
Well, mostly usual, anyway. For those who were still in school, the end of the year was approaching, with all the chaos that typically accompanied it. This particular Friday, two of the girls found themselves awaiting a fate that they melodramatically declared worse than death as they waited with their history class outside the auditorium.
Lia was shaking. She was seriously shaking. "I can't do this," she moaned.
"What?" Lyn asked, stopping briefly to talk as she passed on her way to 5th period. "Is there another apocalypse?"
Diana shot her a what-are-you-crazy look. "I wish. Though it might as well be."
"Well, what is it then? What's giving you guys such a wiggins?" Lyn asked impatiently.
"History test," Lia replied in a dead voice.
"So, what's the big deal? I thought you crazy people had a history test practically everyday. What's with all the panic?" Lyn asked. She did have a point. The other girls were in a history class that was rumoured to be the hardest class in the school, and their teacher was indeed a bit test-happy.
Diana rolled her eyes. "That would be because it's not just any test, it's the AP test. A four-hour long, fucking hard test. That determines whether or not we get college credit for the class."
Lyn turned to Lia, who fortunately wasn't looking quite so catatonic as she had been a moment before. "Is my mind playing tricks on me, or did I just hear Diana Osbourne swear?"
Diana thwapped her for the comment, but Lia just said morosely, "We're going to our doom."
"Good luck with that," Lyn said cheerfully, waved, and walked off.
"That girl is evil," Diana muttered. The proctor called them in, and they went to take their test.
When Lia and Diana finally got out of testing that afternoon, cursing whomever had decided to make AP test times continue on past the end of the school day, they headed over to the Summers house. Both had agreed not to even talk about the test for a long while, so they chatted about various inane things on the walk over.
But by the time they reached Lia's room, she was looking morose again. She sighed, and flopped down on her bed.
"What's wrong?" Diana asked, sitting down next to her.
"Myles," was all Lia said.
Diana frowned. "Why? What's happening with Myles?"
"Nothing," Lia pouted. "Same as for the last, what is it, three months? It's like that thing Aunt Willow once said – we're in a holding pattern, only without any holding, or anything else. I'm tired of holding patternyness!"
"Just speak up then," Diana advised. "Tell him you like him."
"Easier said than done, Lia grumbled, raking a hand through her long black hair. "Just wait until you're in this position and see how well you do. It's much with the awkwardness. And rather a bit of pointlessness, too, since attraction is already kinda mutually acknowledged. Or at least I think so. I know you guys keep telling me that he likes me back, but I have to admit that after this long, I'm starting to wonder."
Diana gave her a sympathetic half-smile. "Oh, don't get all doubty. He's totally into you. It's completely obvious. Well, at least to anyone not you."
Lia scowled at her. "Are you saying there's something wrong with me?"
"Not at all," the redhead replied. "Just that as the person in question, you're expected to be blind. Don't worry. You'll get your smoochies soon enough." She grimaced. "And you know how hard it is for me to tell you this, considering he's like my brother, and the whole thought of you two kinda borders on mental places I'd really rather not go."
Lia smiled weakly back. "Thanks, Di. You're the best. I'm just, ya know, nervous. And furthermore, the way things are going, I'm beginning to suspect that if I want any Myles-kissage, I'm going to have to ask him out. Not the way it's supposed to work, peepz! And which, as previously mentioned, I'm way too scared to do."
"I understand. But, Lia. Dead horse. Flog much?" Diana said pointedly.
"I know, I know," the older girl said apologetically, standing up and beginning to pace around the room. "I'm so sorry, I've totally been talking your ear off. I just want him so much." A moment later, she realized how that statement sounded and hastily corrected herself. "Aah, not supposed to come out like that. I mean, not like that, because eeeeww-."
"Yes, thank you for that scary visual place," Diana interjected sarcastically.
Lia winced. "Sorry! I was trying not to bring that up, Even for me that's … just, no! It's sorta funny, actually, fantasizing and dreaming about a real life crush just feels somehow wrong. Let alone any … steamier imaginings." With a slight laugh, she turned and gestured towards her wall of BJT fanart. "Hence the continued Daemon-love. I'll tell you something, be wise while you still can, and stick with fictional crushes. It's so much less messy and painful."
"I can imagine," Diana laughed.
"Thanks for indulging my need for serious girl talk, Di."
"No problem. I know how that is."
"Now, all I need to do is get Dawn to get off my back about Myles. Or at least, more importantly, convince her to leave him alone. She keeps threatening to hit him if I don't ask him out."
Diana laughed at the thought.
Lia scowled, and plopped down on her window seat. "No, really," she groused. "Yesterday before school, I was over in the art room. She comes in, asks me, 'can I assault Myles'. I say no, she then asks if Lyn can. At least that time she went away after that. Usually she's not nearly so agreeable."
"Ouch," Diana commented sympathetically, but she was struggling not to laugh.
"Yeah," Lia muttered. "Darn sister. Some days I just wish she would've stayed a ball of energy."
"Where are Dawn and Katelyn anyway?" Diana asked.
Lia thought for a moment. "Uh, I think they went out Bronzing. Which is actually sounding like a pretty good idea right about now. I'd better do a quick patrol first, but then you wanna join them?"
The younger girl smiled. "Sure. Sounds like a plan!"
"K then, just give me a sec," Lia said. She threw on a green tank top emblazoned with the words "Kiss Me, I'm Irish" and a pair of black low rise jeans. She then pulled out the weapons bag she kept under her bed. She fastened a large silver cross on a chain at her neck, and fished out two stakes, one of which she tossed up to her friend. "Di?"
"Yeah?"
"Want a knife too?"
"Sure." Diana had developed a bit of a talent for throwing knives.
Lia pulled out the weapon in question and handed it over. Straightening up, she kicked the bag back under her bed and shrugged on a black leather jacket. "Great. Let's go."
"Ya know," Lia commented, half an hour and seven of Sunnydale's twelve cemeteries later, "Mom once said Uncle Xander had told her he wished dating was more like slaying."
"O-kay?" Diana responded.
Lia giggled. "Uh huh. 'Simple, direct, stake to the heart, no fuss, no mess.' I kinda know the feeling, but I'd hardly call an apocalypse simple or no fuss."
Diana started to respond, but ended up just eep-ing and leaping behind a convenient tombstone when a newly risen vampire charged at the girls.
"Of course – oof –," Lia grunted as the fledgling knocked the wind out of her with a well placed punch, but recovered almost instantaneously and continued the conversation as she kicked the vamp down, "that was when – uh – he was going out with Aunt Cordy, so I can almost – understand." She plunged her stake into the fledgling's heart, and as it turned to dust she turned away to help Diana up.
"Am I the only one weirded out by some of the stuff about our parents when they were our age? Because the whole idea of that couple just boggles the mind," Diana commented as they continued on past rows of headstones.
"Ohhh yeah," the damphyr agreed. "It wigs me too. It's like the more I hear, the less I want to know." They finished their rounds of that particular graveyard, and she asked, "So, on to Restfield then?"
"But of course," Diana said. "What really freaks me though, is not only that Uncle Xander and Aunt Cordy dated, but the reason they broke it off is because he was cheating on her with my mom, of all people."
"This is why adults should not be allowed to have had childhoods," Lia commented. Suddenly she frowned, and looked to her friend in confusion. "Why's my pocket vibrating?"
Diana smirked at her friend's confusion. "Phone."
Lia slapped her forehead, "Oh, doh!" She pulled out the cell, and flipped it open to answer it. "Hello? … What? … Yeah, kay … yeah, Diana and I'll be right over. Kay, bye." She snapped the phone shut, and tucked it away with a muttered curse. "Damnit, there goes our evening," she pouted.
"What?" Diana asked.
Lia sighed. "We're wanted at the Magic Box. They've had a breakthrough on a prophecy."
