AN/ Welcome to the second chapter featuring all the ridiculousness of the Marauders! Thanks for two reviews already, and with only one chapter out, I can't wait to give you guys more! So. You ready to try to ride the rollercoaster that is the Marauders' lives?

Disclaimer: Not J.K. Rowling. Why would she be using this site? Like we Potterheads would be all over anything she published.


"Remus? Remus? Remus..."

Remus bit down on his lip in an attempt to try to ignore Sirius' hand. This was a difficult feat, as the raven-haired boy's hand floated between Remus' book and his face. Remus tried to focus on the paragraph he was reading, but the more he tried to ignore Sirius' hand, the more he found himself looking at it.

"What?" Remus snapped, finally too annoyed to ignore the raven-haired boy. Sirius straightened with a smirk, and Remus realized that he given his dorm-mate exactly what he had wanted. His attention. With a sigh, Remus set down his book. When Sirius raised an eyebrow, Remus gave an irritated explanation.

"Well, you're obviously not going to let me go back to my reading until I hear you out, so I might as well listen. James want me down there?" Sirius grinned at him.

"Got it in one, Remus. James told me to come get you and drag you down to the common room to celebrate with the rest of the Gryffindors. They're thrilled they got a Black in their house." Remus snorted.

"James told you? I don't think so." Even in the short time Remus had known his new dorm-mates, it had become clear to him that Sirius was not a person who took orders well. He was a leader or a partner, never a follower. And Remus had only known him for a few hours.

"Okay, maybe he more suggested it and I agreed," Sirius conceded.

"And you just didn't want to get blamed," Remus scoffed. "How responsible."

"That must be sarcasm." Sirius flopped onto his bed and lazily put his feet up. Remus peered at him over the top of his book, which he had picked up again with the intention of reading.

"You aren't going back down?"

Sirius shook his head, giving Remus an innocent smile. "Nope. Don't want to."

"Fine," Remus drawled, wary but unable to act on his suspicions. "Just don't bother me."

"Okay."

There was silence for a few moments. Remus tried to read, but he ended up sighing and closing his book again. When Sirius raised an eyebrow, Remus rolled a hand. "Spit it out."

"What?" Sirius asked, just as innocently as his smile had been. Which was surprisingly so.

"Just-" Remus waved his hands, stifling an insult. "Out with it." Sirius shot him a lazy grin.

"I'm trying to figure out the best way to drag you down there without hurting you."

Remus sighed again, an action he thought he was doing too much of lately, then trudged down to the common room, followed eagerly by Sirius. The loud chatter of his housemates hit his ears like a sledgehammer, and Remus immediately strayed into the corner of the room. He stayed in the shadows for a half and hour before slipping back upstairs to enjoy his book. Peter was the only one to see him go, but, correctly assuming Remus wanted some peace, didn't call him out.

It was a little after ten when James and Peter came up, but it was almost midnight when Sirius entered the dorm, crashing into things as he went.

Remus pulled his curtains aside and watched as Sirius toppled onto his bed with a groan, falling asleep as soon as he hit his pillow. Either he had too much sugar, or my eleven-year-old dorm-mate is drunk, Remus thought, somewhat amused. He pulled the curtains shut, trying to find sleep again.

An hour or so later, Remus still hadn't fallen asleep. He sighed and stood, padding silently to the window and peering out. His eyes scanned the grounds before landing on the moon. The moonlight made him shudder, but the wolf inside him knew it couldn't get out for more than two weeks, so it stayed still. Thankfully.

"Remus?"

Remus whipped around, but once he realized it was just a sleepy Sirius, he relaxed, letting a smile cross his face. The raven-haired boy was looking up at him with the dazed look of the recently awoken. Remus knew the other boy probably wouldn't remember the conversation they were having tomorrow.

"Don't worry, it's not time to wake up," he assured. You can still sleep off your hangover or sugar high or whatever."

Sirius continued to stare blankly at him and Remus chuckled, walking back to his bed. Yeah, he's definitely half asleep right now. He won't remember a thing in the morning.

"Go back to sleep, Sirius," Remus said, laying down and pulling the curtains closed around him. This time, he fell asleep almost instantly.


Remus was startled awake when a pillow slammed into his sheets, catching the corner of Remus' blanket and sending it flying. He bolted upright, staring dumbfounded at the pillow. Then the rest of the bedlam exploded his senses, shocking him to awareness.

Peter was running around, chased by a book that was baring extremely pointy teeth. Chains rattled around it, and it took Remus a second to realize out that those chains were supposed to be latched around the book to keep it from doing any damage. Sirius was running after James, a pillow in his hands and a murderous look in his eyes. It took Remus a few more seconds to notice that Sirius was covered in some kind of white powder. James was roaring with laughter, despite the fact that Sirius looked ready to kill him.

Remus snatched his wand off his side table and held it hesitantly, not sure who or what to target first. Finally, he decided to try to calm all the chaos at once. The first spell that popped into his mind was something he was certain he couldn't do, but he screamed it anyway.

"Immobilus!"

To Remus' surprise, a flash of light burst from the tip of his wand. When the spots faded from his eyes, he realized the spell had worked. The room was frozen. James' eyes flicked sideways to look at him, as it seemed he could no longer move his neck.

"Remus," he said in a tone that some would call awestruck. "That was bloody brilliant!"

With a growl, Remus stood, dropping his wand onto his bed and kneeling next to his trunk. "What on earth happened while I was asleep?" he demanded, rooting through his trunk.

"James happened," Peter said nervously, which was understandable considering he had been in the act of tripping when Remus had frozen the room. "I was just waking up when I saw James crouching over Sirius' slippers. I asked what he was doing, and he jumped, throwing the bag he was holding at Sirius instead of his slippers. James threw a clock at me as payback, but it hit my book instead. That was when Sirius tried to clobber James with his pillow, which I think landed on your bed."

Remus paused in looking for his book of spells. "Where did you get the powder?" he wondered aloud. "And what is it?" James grinned easily.

"Oh, my family have friends whose kids go here. One of them got me a bag of itching powder from Zonko's. I've been saving that thing for months now."

"You know it's illegal to steal things from Zonko's," Remus said flatly. James grinned again.

"It wasn't stolen."

"Doesn't matter, you jerk!" Sirius howled. "You coated me in itching powder, and in case you didn't notice, I can't scratch myself!"

Remus growled again and muttered the counter spell to his own. Peter toppled forward and landed on the carpet with a thud, his book launching itself onto his back. Sirius whacked James over the head with his pillow before dropping it and stalking back to his bed. James ignored the pillow whack and collapsed on his bed, still laughing like a maniac. Needless to say, Remus attempted to avoid the other boys the entire time it took him to get ready. He grabbed his books and hurried out the door.

Two of my dorm-mates are lunatics, Remus thought, making his way through the common room and down to the Great Hall. He hunched in his seat, taking a few pieces of toast and trying to look as inconspicuous as he could. But a few minutes later, James, Peter, and Sirius tracked him down.

"Sorry that's what you had to wake up to," James said, pushing some older Gryffindor out of his way so he could slid onto the bench across from Remus. Peter sat next to him, but he went the route of politely asking. "But the look on Sirius' face was too good!"

Remus glowered at him. "If someone had heard, you could have gotten points deducted your very first day!" he hissed. "Look, James, if you've got a brain in that big head of yours, use it! You should've put duct tape on Peter's curtains, so you would have had time when he woke up. As for Sirius' slippers, you really should have done it earlier, when he was less likely to wake up, or waited until he was gone. And besides all that, you would've needed to prank yourself so we wouldn't get suspicious of you!"

Remus realized his mistake the second James and Sirius glanced at each other with matching devious grins.

"Oh no," he objected. "No, no, no-"

"That's pretty smart of you," James noted, nodding his admiration. Sirius bobbed his head as well.

"Guess all that reading actually does help," the raven-haired boy said breezily. Remus gave Sirius a sharp elbow to the side, but the other boy just grinned, even as he doubled over and wheezed for breath.

"So from now on, we'll be coming to you to make sure our prank plans are solid," James decided. He then promptly reached for the nearest pitcher of orange juice, as if his word was law and the rest of them should simply accept it.

"Sounds good," Sirius agreed. Remus spluttered indignantly.

"I have better things to do with my time than to deal with whatever lunacy you two create!" he protested. He looked to Peter for support. "Come on, Pete, back me up here." Peter's eyes said that he agreed, but his mouth said,

"Sorry, Remus. Too scared of getting pranked myself."

Remus put his head in his hands, staring at his unfinished breakfast. "I'm going to have my hands full stopping you two, won't I?" he asked with a glum resignation. Sirius slung an arm around his shoulders, a far too pleased look on his face.

"Yes, yes you are." Remus dug his elbow into Sirius' side again.


Luckily for Remus, their first week at Hogwarts was too crowded with classes to allow James or Sirius time to think up a way to make life hard for the rest of the school. There were little things, but nothing like the disaster Remus had witnessed in their dorm. That was extremely lucky for him, because Remus needed all the brain power he had to remember the knowledge that was being crammed in his brain. And the homework... Remus had never minded homework, but when he crashed in the common room at the end of the week, he was feeling overwhelmed.

The bright spot in Remus' week was the friend he had made.

It had happened in Potions, when he had been paired with bubbly redhead named Lily Evans. She was a very bright girl who was not only a natural at Potions, which was a plus, since Remus was bloody awful, but she was also the redhead who had been flanked the greasy-haired boy that Remus had lied to. He had been meaning to track down both of them anyway.

Remus' and Lily's conversations had started out innocently enough, with subjects along the lines of school and the potions on hands, but on Thursday, out of the blue, Lily had said,

"I know they were in that compartment."

Remus had been so shocked, he had dropped the beaker he had been holding. He had managed to catch it, and after hastily assuring Professor Slughorn, yes, everything was fine, he had turned to Lily.

"You did- er, do?" he asked, a tad nervously. Lily shrugged.

"I saw them." She frowned. "Why did you cover for them? Potter and Black were being awful, and I thought you didn't know them." Remus shook his head.

"I barely do. I met them for the first time on the train. Honest."

"Then-" Lily started, frowning.

"Well, your friend seemed angry," Remus interrupted, lifting a placating hand. "I reasoned that I wouldn't appreciate getting ratted out to someone in that state, so I lied." Lily sniffed.

"Well, Severus wasn't happy. Once we got to Hogwarts, I told him they had been in that compartment. You and that blond boy are innocent, and I tried to tell him that, but he's pretty mad at all of you. You should tell Potter and Black to stay away from him for a while, because trust me, you don't want to be around Severus when he's angry."

"His name's Severus?" Remus asked. Lily looked at him curiously.

"Yes, it it. Why would you say that?"

"Well, Sirius and James gave him a different name." Lily narrowed her eyes.

"What?"

Remus chewed his lip, already regretting continuing on the conversation. But he reluctantly said, "Snivellus."

"I'm not surprised," Lily growled. "Merlin, I hate those two."

"They're not that bad," Remus said, surprising both of them.

"I thought you said you barely know them."

Remus did barely know Sirius and James. He didn't know why he was defending them. Sirius and James had attempted to prank, no, bully Severus and they should have paid the price. In fact, considering what they had put him through throughout this week, it would be nice to see them punished. But Remus heard his mouth said,

"You don't really know them either, Lily."

Lily gave him another curious look before returning to her cauldron. She was about to toss a spoonful of powder in, but Remus grabbed her wrist.

"Hold on," he said, nodding at the open Potions book in front of them. "The book says to wait five minutes before adding the powder."

"Oh." Lily squinted at the page, then looked up at him with a grateful smile. "Thanks, Remus." Remus smiled back.

"No problem."

The rest of that Potions class had been spent in companionable silence, broken only by their occasional comments.


Remus collapsed into one of the couches by the fire, his bag dumped carelessly next to him. Remus' head spun from all the information his teachers had tried to cram into it. Simple Transfiguration. Pfft. Nothing simple about it at all, Remus thought tiredly. He rubbed his temples, trying to remove the image of a mouse being turned into a cup from his mind. He would be better off without that floating around his already packed mind.

"Thanks for standing up for us."

Remus jumped and his eyes flew open. He looked around wildly, then relaxed as he realized it was just Sirius and James. They stood next to his chair, both smirking. Peter had already fallen into the chair across from him and could only send him a shrug when Remus gave him an inquisitive look.

"What do you mean?" Remus asked slowly, deciding it was a better course of action than to say "You're welcome". After all, he wasn't sure if they meant what he thought they did, and he didn't want people getting the idea that he was part of this group of lunatics. Though it might already be too late to salvage that façade.

"Please," Sirius said, lazily flopping onto the couch next to Remus. "James and I heard you." Remus scowled, both at James' bat hearing and Sirius' pleased grin. "So thanks for that. We don't need a dirty secret floating around." Remus put his face in his hands.

"One bloody week and I'm consorting with pranksters," he moaned.

"Consorting is too long a word," James mused. "I prefer interacting."

"That's longer," Remus muttered, making the bespectacled boy laugh.

"Exactly why we need you to be the brains of this group." James reached into his robes and pulled out a piece of paper, dropping it on the table in front of Remus. Remus eyed it, not even reaching out.

"And?" he asked warily. James gestured to the piece of paper, and Remus looked around at the faces surrounding him. Peter, blond hair and blue eyes, full of energy and enthusiasm, as well as a sense of innocence. James, tousled black hair and dark hazel eyes, his wit and charm sparkling like his glasses. And Sirius, black hair falling over his bright gray eyes, smirk and wink at the ready. Remus knew he was stuck with them. And whether he liked it or not, Remus knew he felt a connection to them. He sighed, picking up the piece of paper.

"Well, I can see one flaw already," he noted, raising an eyebrow at his companions.

"What is it?" James asked.

"It's blank."

"And that, mate, is why we need you," Sirius said. "Jamesie and I have a bunch of ideas, but we need you to make them possible."

Remus tilted his head. "You actually have something for me?"

"Oh yeah, several plans," James said eagerly. Remus leaned back, folding his hands behind his head and closing his eyes.

"Fire away."


Thanks for reading! Please drop a review, even if you already have, as it makes my day that much brighter. Trust me, I love getting your guys' thoughts and observations. I'll try to get the next chapter out as soon as possible! Bird out!