Chapter 2: Confusion and Roll-Call

Voldemort's POV

I would say I was shocked but crazier things have happened. (Like not being able to kill a 1 year old. Geez they're never gonna let me live that one down, are they?) I looked over to Bellatrix, she looked confused and angry, and that's not good with Bellatrix!

I stared at her with probable pleading eyes. "Bella?" I asked.

She just looked at the crowd and thought for a moment. "I probably could," she announced. "but it could take a while.

I sighed, "Fine, now we have to do this correctly now!"

I projected my voice and said, "Stop fighting you sparkly men and giant anamagi."

They all froze and stared at me, apparently realizing there was a huge house here.

"I am more confused than usual. I hate that!" I yelled. "Now I'm going to need a representative to-ooh"

I cut myself short as I saw Cedric Diggary staring at me.

"You, Diggary!" I yelled. "I thought I killed you." I said.

Cedric sighed as if it were obvious. "My name is Edward Cullen. I've been called Cedric Diggary four times! One: a boy with black hair, green eyes, and a lightning scar. Two: by some ginger with freckles galore and with a confused look on his face. Three: by a girl with bushy hair, brown eyes, and an annoying, bossy kind of voice. Four: by you, some bald guy with creepy red eyes, no nose, and a posse of creepy people who look like they'd kill us and eat our flesh. That's not good, I'm a vampire." He finished.

"You don't like Potter either?" I asked with little girl glee. "Then you can definitely come in!" Cedric sighed and stepped forward.

"What about me?" asked one of the shirtless anamagi.

"Hmmm?" I thought. "Well you seem weird and uncontrollable, just like Bellatrix!" I smiled a toothy grin and everyone stepped back at my wonderful complexion.

"My name is Jacob Black." Said the anamagi. "I'm a werewolf, not an anamagi." He said flatly.

"No, a werewolf only transforms during the full moon." I said as if I knew everything. (Which in my world, I do!)

"Whatever floats your boat, weirdo." He murmured under his breath as he stepped forward.

"Let's see whose next?" I said as I looked through the crowd. "Ah! Clinically depressed girl!" I said as I pointed at the non sparkly non shirtless anamagi.

"What does she represent?" asked a sparkly girl. The crowd murmured in agreement.

"She represents why you should never put your heart and soul into a boy you know is going to leave you, and because she stands out and Bellatrix hates that." I said. The crowd seems satisfied.

"Well, that's all I wanted, you can get back to killing each other." I said pleasantly.

As if on cue they started to battle again. I was satisfied, Bellatrix seemed very happy to see them claw each other's eyes out, ("Nobody sparkles but me and what I want to sparkle." Said Bellatrix under her breath.) and Wormtail looked terrified, as usual.