A/N: Hehehe. Thrilled you're enjoying the journey so far. Let's see what Bella plans to do with our Edward.


Bella called him at six in the morning on purpose.

"Hello?" His voice was all gravel and sex. Bella allowed herself a brief moment to appreciate the brilliance of her plan. "Hello?"

She cleared her throat. "What are you doing this weekend?"

"Who is this?"

"Answer the question, boy. What are you doing this weekend?"

"I'm, um, going to-"

"No, you're not. You're going to be at the address I'm texting you. It's a nice, woodsy park just outside of town. This is not negotiable."

There was a pause. "Is this Bella?"

"Peon. You will follow instructions."

"Peon?"

"Good lord. They say you're a genius. Yes or no? Are you going to break your word?"

He yawned. For some reason, Bella pictured him in a white shirt, his arms stretched over his head. She shivered. "Fine, fine. I'm awake. What time do I have to be there?"

"Ten."

"Ten!? It's six in the morning."

"I'm a generous queen. It's obvious your beauty routine must take hours."

"Very funny. What do you mean queen? And why are you talking like that?"

"Ten o'clock, peon." She hung up the phone and flopped down on the bed, giggling to herself as she rolled over to sleep another couple hours.

~0~

"Okay, what are you getting me into, Swan?"

"Silence, peon."

"What the fuck is with you and this peon bullshit? And why are you dressed like that?" He gestured at her long dress. "You look like a psychedelic, Renfaire cast off."

"Uh, I look like a badass in a dress, is what I look like." Bella let out a long suffering sigh and her posture slumped slightly "Okay. Do you know what larping is?"

"What?"

"Live action role play. That's what we're doing here. Do you know what that is?"

He balked. "You're kidding, right? You want me to pretend to be like a dragon or something? Pretend to throw lightning bolts while we walk around using Shakespearean words?"

Bella's lip twitched. "Of course not." He looked relieved. "You don't get to do anything nearly as cool. Don't worry. You're not going to get into anything complicated. Here are the rules. You do exactly what I say when I say. No questions, no talking back."

"I'm roleplaying a pansy then?"

"No. You're roleplaying a slave. My slave."

His eyebrows shot up toward that bird's nest he called hair. "You have slaves?"

She gestured to her elaborate dress. "I'm a queen. Queen Kalina of Iapx. You will bow before me." She pointed to the floor.

He looked like he was about to argue, but then he sunk to his knees. He looked up at her from beneath long eyelashes and batted them. "If I do this, do I at least get a cool name? Can I be Stormaggedon, Dark Lord of All?"

"What? No. Peons have no names. They are less than nothing. And they especially have no names when they're stealing from Doctor Who. Ugh. I'm disappointed in you, peon. Your speaking privileges have been revoked."

"But-"

"Silence!" Bella snapped her fingers. Most everyone in the game was ready to go and Mike and Eric, who had been watching them to that point, were at her side, kneeling, in an instant. "Take this peon and get him in clothing more befitting of his station. Quickly."

"Hey," Edward protested as Mike and Eric manhandled him to his feet.

"Go with them and hold your tongue, peon. It's really not that difficult."

By the time Mike and Eric came back with a grumpy looking Edward, now in a get up that was closer to a burlap sack than not, Jasper and Alice, the couple who played Bella's closest advisors, had arrived in her tent.

"What's this? Have you acquired a nubile young slave boy?" Alice stepped over to him. She was five foot nothing, but Edward leaned away from her when she got in his personal space. "Hmm. He is obviously not of good breeding."

"He'll do," Bella said, waving a hand. "Peon." She pointed to Mike. "Instruct this one on the rules of the house so he will not embarrass us. This is a very important gathering."

Mike stood before Edward. "My queen intends to entertain the Chief of the wild tribe of warriors, the Serigala tribe, Djin'yan and his party this day."

"Which I have told Her Majesty is a bad idea," Jasper said.

Mike paid no attention to Jasper but continued his instruction to a bemused looking Edward. "You will follow the orders of the queen, her lieutenants Isli Pyrosi and Iasus Spereth," he gestured to Alice and Jasper, "and the guests to the letter. You will not speak unless spoken to."

"Christ. You people are a freak show, you know that?" Edward said.

"We have stocks, peon," Bella said. She could barely keep her laughter at bay. "This is your last warning. Quiet, lest you get shoved in one to be made an example of."

The look in his eyes was a challenge. You wouldn't dare. He opened his mouth.

Bella sat up straight and tilted her head at him. Try me.

Edward closed his mouth, and Bella smirked.

~0~

"My lady." Jasper came into her tent with three others behind him. "I have returned with your esteemed guests. May I present Chief Dingly Dan, leader of the Serigala tribe, and his two men, Dick-Us and Fuck-Us."

Jacob Black shook his head. They were all shirtless, their chests and arms painted with symbolic symbols in an approximation of tattoos. Jacob's long hair was braided and fell halfway down his back. Bella resisted the urge to snicker. Someone watched too much Game of Thrones and considered himself a Khal.

He stepped forward. "Queen Kalina of the kingdom of Iapx. My name is Djin'yan. My men are called Vilkas and Farkas." He raised an eyebrow at Jasper.

"My apologies, Chief Yin Yang," Jasper said.

Bella managed to temper her smile as she extended a hand toward Jacob for him to kiss. He looked at it, looked back at her, and a smile crawled up the right side of his face. He stepped back purposefully and looked her up and down, and then looked around the room. "You have introduced your men, but who are these others." He gestured at Mike, Eric, and Edward.

Edward was watching with a look that was half bemusement, half complete disbelief. She made a subtle gesture and Mike smacked Edward's arm, gesturing that he should bow his head. Bella looked back to Jacob. "They are nothing."

"You said you would only have two with you."

"And so I do. They are servants, no more." She tilted her head. "They are spoils, former elites of kingdoms I have conquered. Kingdoms that were easily stronger than your tribe. Once they were served by legions of slaves. Now they empty my chamberpot." Her point made, Bella smiled and swept her hand wide. "Please sit." She snapped at the peons. "Serve our guests."

There was some bustle as the three served wine (grape juice) and cheese (cheese).

"I must say, I'm surprised you've invited me to your private chambers. Do you not worry people think ill of you?" Jacob asked.

"My people know I have better taste than to consort with you. I care not one iota about what your people think." Bella waved a hand. "Let us speak plainly. These skirmishes you've initiated must stop. Your father and I kept out of each other's way. I was hoping we could come to some agreement."

"Mayhap." He looked her over, his lips coming up in a leer. "Mayhap an arrangement could be made by joining my tribe with your kingdom. You are quite becoming for being so pale. That is the way of your people, is it not? You broker peace through the potential of a shared lineage?"

Bella laughed. "You wish to be my king?"

Jacob put his hand on hers. "You think highly of yourself. I have no wish to be the ruler of your people." The look on his face suggested the idea disgusted him. Pale faces. Ew. He leaned forward. "However, I can be coaxed into peace in other ways."

Bella pulled her hand back, but he gripped her wrist to keep her pinned. "Don't be so quick to dismiss me, Highness."

"Let me go, or you will find yourself sans a hand, Chief," she said through gritted teeth.

Over Jacob's shoulder, Bella saw a curious sight. Edward had taken a single step forward. He looked pissed. She held her hand out to stop his forward motion.

Jacob's grin widened. He took a deep breath and then he shouted something in a language Bella didn't understand.

Then, all hell broke loose.


A/N: I've been told Peonward sounds too dirty. Hmm. Many thanks to Songster.

SO! How are we feeling about all things LARP?