I'm gonna try to write more on Eta Carinae Nebula, guys. I promise. For now, enjoy this little tidbit. The prompt is Treat! As for the AU, you'll figure it out.

By the way, if anyone wants to take some of these AU ideas and run with them, be my guest. We need more fics.


Balthazar seldom went out to bars on nights like this. Gabriel invited him out for the Superbowl, then the Fourth of July, then Halloween, and finally the blonde agreed to go and see what all the fuss was about. New Years' Eve had the Wolves' Den jumping like he had never seen before.

Not to say he didn't get out. Balthazar did and quite often, as a matter of fact. He just didn't like crowds. Yet, somehow he found himself enjoying the atmosphere. Music thumped from the dance floor, colored lights streamed everywhere, and at least three quarters of the people around them had little masks on detailing the year to come in case some poor sob had gotten drunk enough to forget. Which seemed to be the exact road Balthazar was headed down right now, actually.

Gabriel was laughing, already there, as he ordered another round for them both. While Balthazar was the only one that came out with him, Speight didn't lack friends. Everyone seemed to know him. "'Nother on me, Bobby!"

The gruff older man came back up to him from behind the bar, not looking to be in the holiday spirit too much. "You keep screaming that, Gabe, and I really will put it on ya," he huffed humorously as he poured them both more Jack. "Loosened up yet, Balthazar?"

"Somewhat," the blonde laughed in response while Gabe downed his drink in a heartbeat. "This is fun, though. Perhaps you can point out the single ones?"

"Yeah," Bobby sighed, turning to another customer, "You've loosened up."

Gabriel hit him on the arm and leaned closer. "We got twenty minutes left before midnight! Unless you wanna kiss me, we gotta find some tail."

Finding someone to kiss in twenty minutes wouldn't be terribly hard in this crowd, Balthazar figured. They were basically shoulder to shoulder, people bumping into him at any given interval. His back was constantly being prodded by people ordering drinks, and the jackass on the opposite side of his friend seemed inclined to get in his lap for all the pushing against him that man's done. But he didn't mind. Somehow. It was all kind of fun. Just part of the experience. With warm bodies everywhere, everyone in an excited mood, finding someone to kiss would be stupidly easy. "I love you Gabriel, but not that much," Balthazar spoke, looking around the bar. "How about the dance-"

The man next to him, the one who had been edging closer to him the whole night, wrapped an arm around Balthazar's neck, pulling him close and not even looking at him. The man twisted them both around to face a surly looking woman on the stool next the mystery man. "Here," the guy announced, "We're engaged."

Balthazar blinked, trying to process what the fuck just happened, wondering if he should shove the guy off or something.

The woman blinked back at him, annoyed, then glanced up to the man. "You're gay now?"

The man finally looked at who he snagged under his arm then back to the woman. "Yes."

Oh, Jesus H. Christ. For real? He couldn't tell the damn woman to sod off? He had to rope a stranger into an elaborate lie? This guy was nuts... but that explained why he was edging towards Balthazar the whole night. He was trying to get away from the woman. Perhaps he knew her. She glared at him like they knew each other.

Balthazar glanced up to him and decided to hell with it. "Bi, actually," he smirked, putting his arm across the man's tense shoulders. On second thought, this might even be fun. Surely, Gabriel was getting a laugh out of it if nothing else.

The woman, not entirely convinced, glared between the two of them before her eyes zeroed in on Balthazar. "What's his name?" she nodded to the mystery man.

Very good question. Such a good question, in fact, that the man's fingers twitched. Balthazar decided to summon up his one year of theater in high school and scowled. "What the hell is your name, honey, and why exactly are you bothering my boyfriend? Go bark up another tree, sweetheart."

Her face turned red and her jaw set a little tighter, but she looked unperturbed. The woman looked back to the man. "You really expect me to believe this, Lucifer?"

Okay, Balthazar didn't have to act anymore. He stood from his seat, letting the man's arm go around his waist. "Take a hint, woman. He's not interested. Carry yourself."

That served to make her a bit angrier, but instead of biting back again, she stood and began walking towards the tables. Balthazar watched her, even as she glanced back to them with a snarl a couple of times, but eventually took his seat again, the man under his arm deflating quite a bit. "Who in hell's name was that harpy?"

"Eve," the mystery man answered, "She's an ex from like three years ago, but the woman's crazy." Balthazar was about to make an agreeable comment, when the man continued. "Look, thank you so much. She literally doesn't know what no means, so thank you. Let me buy you a drink."

Gabriel barked a laugh from behind them. "Are you kidding? The comedy gold is plenty payment for that!"

The man looked pretty embarrassed over it, but his attention on Gabriel gave Balthazar the chance to study him for a second. Dark blonde hair, striking blue eyes under small glasses, firm jaw, lean build- No wonder she was obsessed. He was a marvel to look at it. "It's fine," Balthazar laughed, waving to the offer, "I'm happy I could help at least." Happy he could pretend to be with someone who looked that good for a hot second, damn. The thought of wrapping him up for that midnight kiss crossed his mind, but it seemed pretty obvious by the earlier exchange that he was nothing but straight. A shame, really. "I'm Balthazar, in case she asks who you're marrying."

The man chuckled and shook the offered hand. "You caught my name. Most people call me Lu, though." So that was his real name then?

"Um," Gabriel hid behind Balthazar's back, trying to casually look over the blonde's shoulder, "Not to break up the blind date, but she's staring right over here." Lu frowned but didn't look. Neither did Balthazar, opting to take his friend's word on it and hoping she didn't see them shake hands during the introduction. "Should we take this somewhere else or get the wedding bells going?"

Balthazar risked a glance and, sure enough, spied the bitch glaring a hole in his head. He smirked back and stood up, offering a hand to a very apologetic Lu. "I was just about to snatch someone up for a dance, if you're willing."

The strawberry blonde actually smiled to the notion and took his hand. "I could stand to blow off some steam anyway."

"Keep it PG, you two," Gabriel smirked from his place at the bar, hailing Bobby for another drink.

Balthazar pulled Lu up from his seat and began to weave through the crowd, making space for the two of them to get to the ridiculously dense dance floor. But that would be ideal, actually. For once, Balthazar appreciated the flood of people. Less chance for Eve to see the two of them. The crowd finally dispersed a bit once they were on the dance floor, and Balthazar led them to a spot away from the speakers. He grinned and turned back around to his partner in crime, noticing his grin as well before embracing him for their dance.

Still, he didn't want to make this too awkward for the poor man. It was true enough that Balthazar swung many ways when it came to relationships, but he was still fairly sure Lu wouldn't be into a mating display. For appearance's sake, though, he pulled him close so they could speak. "Did you come here alone?"

Lu shook his head. "I'm here with my brother." Balthazar could feel the smile against his cheek. "Lost track of him a while ago, though."

Well that wasn't good. "You have a phone, yeah?"

"Yeah," he laughed, "I just got preoccupied with Eve, then you..."

Balthazar nodded. "I take it this isn't your first time here, though."

"I somehow doubt it's not yours either."

Curse this man for being straight. The blonde smirked. "No, but I don't typically come out for parties like this."

The other man laughed against him again, a far too wonderful sound. "It's my first time coming out here for New Year's, too. We were actually going to hit a couple of other places tonight, not the least of which is IHOP."

Balthazar's smile just grew. This man was too much. "Then I wouldn't worry much about your ex, then."

"This is the first time I've seen her in over a year! Trust me, I don't worry about her."

Somewhere, someone started screaming and more yells of joy and cheer joined the chorus as the music slowed to a stop. A little confused, Balthazar peeled off of his impromptu date and looked around the crowd, just as everyone started chanting, "Ten! Nine! Eight!" He glanced towards Eve's general direction, quickly finding her with arm's crossed and a smile playing on her lips. Oh, right.

"Seven!"

Balthazar blinked at her and looked back down to Lu. "What's the whole deal about kissing on New Year's anyway?"

"Luck, I think?" the other answered best he could, glancing around the crowd. "Is she watching us?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"Six! Five!"

"So, uhh..." Lu looked around again, a tinge of pink coming to his cheeks before sheepishly looking at Balthazar. "Look, you've done more than enough-"

"It's okay if you don't want a kiss," the blonde chuckled, finding the shyness endearing, but being annoyed at the situation all the same. Damn his good looks to Hell. "I understand."

"Four! Three!"

Lu awkwardly shrugged. "I'm fine with- I just don't want to put you on the spot, that's all. If you're not okay with it, that's okay. And, you know, with Eve and all..."

"I'm fine with it." Maybe he could at least get a parting kiss from the stranger, straight or not. "It would be convincing, after all. I just don't want you uncomfortable."

"Two!"

"I wouldn't be."

"One!"

The room erupted in a roar of applause and cheers as the new year rang in. Balthazar glanced around the room again, watching couples pair up and still spying Eve craning her neck to see them. He turned his attention back to the man in front of him and, before his brain could protest, leaned in to kiss him as if they've dated for years and he knew his lips like they belonged to his lover. Lu wasted no time in returning the kiss, even deepening it, snaking a hand to the back of the blonde's neck. For a mere moment, it was perfect.

And then it was over. Lu leaned away, looking quite shocked, before a smile sprung across his face and he broke down in into a fit of giggles. Balthazar quickly followed, watching his dance partner put a hand to his mouth and glance toward the tables. When the blonde glanced over, all he saw was Eve's back as she walked away. "It bloody worked!"

"Oh my God," Lu barked a laugh, holding on to Balthazar as if to keep himself steady. Finally, though, his breathing became a bit more under control. "Well," he spoke with a big grin and a few misplaced chuckles, "I guess you can consider that your treat for helping me tonight, unless you'd rather that drink now."

Another kiss would suffice. "I might need that drink, actually."

They dissolved into giggles again as the music slowly started back up. Lu straightened up and took Balthazar's hand, beginning to lead them back to the bar. "I hope Mike didn't see that, actually," he chuckled, "Talk about a lot to explain."

When the other glanced back to him, Balthazar gave a goodhearted smirk, but it fell when the man looked away again. Dammit. Just his luck.


Yep! Fake dating AU!

I hope to come back to this one. I got a few things planned. Is Lu really straight? What's the deal with Eve? Is Balthazar going to start caring too much and reach the point of admiration that ends up being unrequited love and super angsty horrible crap that this author loves to write? We may never know, but we probs will.

Thanks for reading!