Please see Chapter 1 for disclaimer.
Also this chapter is set in a different universe more akin to that of J.K.'s rather than the first chapter.
Always remember to Read and Review!
Voldemort sat in complete silence in his study, stroking his snake Nagini and plotting the best way to kill "the boy". And that was when the Death Eater, Wipple, ran in. Voldemort looked up at him annoyed.
"Sir! Sir!" cried Wipple, bowing hurriedly, "We lost your wand sir!" he sounded rather pleased with himself. Voldemort on the other hand was furious. He rose from his chair.
"You what?" asked Voldemort in a deadly voice.
"We lost your wand, sir!" Wipple repeated excitedly, "We was fighting the Order of the Phoenix, sir, and they stole it!" Wipple felt rather strange. "Sir," he asked confused, "Why is your snake eating me?"
"Because you are incompetent," said Voldemort with a shrug.
"Oh alright then," Wipple said with a frown. "But sir, if I'm to be eaten then who's on watch tonight?" Voldemort ignored the Death Eater and Wipple tried to ignore Nagini. However it is very hard to ignore the snake that is eating you but Wipple did his best.
A second Death Eater burst into the room. Voldemort wished he could kill this one too but Nagini was still eating Wipple. And it would appear that his wand was indeed missing.
"Hello Flob!" cried Wipple rather cheerfully from the floor.
"Hello Wipple. I'm sorry, but are you being eaten?" said Flob staring down at his colleague.
"Yup," replied Wipple, shrugging. "But I'm sure I'll be as right as rain by tomorrow."
"Excuse me," interrupted Voldemort, his voice dangerously soft, his eyes reflecting the firelight in a way that suggested he wasn't happy at being ignored. "Do you have something to say Flob?"
"Sir! Sir!" cried Flob, noticing his Master for the first time. "We found your wand sir!" he exclaimed excitedly, brandishing it. The wand let out a few half-hearted sparks.
Voldemort stared at him. The wand was dripping. "Where did you find it, and tell me who stole it," he demanded.
"In the toilet, sir!" Flob cried excitedly. "But I don't know who put it there."
"In the where?" asked Voldemort in a deadly voice, wondering if he had perhaps misheard the man.
"In the toi—Sir, I don't want to be rude but isn't that your snake eating Wipple?"
"Never mind that fool. Where was my wand?"
"In the toi--" Flob suddenly realised what he was saying, "In the...cupboard sir. Covered in... frogspawn... and...Ummm...octopus tentacles. Yeah that's right."
"Give it to me," said Voldemort still using his deadly voice.
"Are you sure sir?" asked Flob, dubiously. "It is rather...wet."
"Give it back now," said Voldemort in a voice that brooked no argument.
Flob gave it to him and backed away to the door. Just as he was about to leave, Voldemort spoke again.
"Since Wipple here is indisposed, and since you have lied to me, you will take his place on watch duty."
"But sir!" exclaimed Flob. "I'm supposed be on duty elsewhere tonight!"
"YOU WILL DO AS I SAY!" roared Voldemort. Flob shrieked and ran from the room, screaming "Yes sir! Right away sir!" at the top of his lungs.
