The second time Mulder was the world's worst date.
Mulder turned up a little early and straighten his tie in the reflection of the restaurant window as he nervously glanced inside to see if she had arrived yet.
He saw Catherine Hanson from the lab sitting at a table near the window and was surprised when she smiled at him with recognition and waved.
Mulder walked in and over towards her table, "Hello, Catherine. Have you seen Scully? We're meant to be meeting here at eight for…"
Catherine grinned, "I hate to break it to you, Agent Mulder, but I think you've been set up."
Mulder looked comically confused, "Set up?"
"You know…set up…I think Dana has been playing matchmaker. I mean, she said she had a friend that she wanted to set me up on a date with, but I really had no idea…"
Catherine was clearly thrilled with the turn of events.
Mulder felt sick to his stomach.
He knew this was not going to be a date per se, but when Scully had suggested they meet for dinner he had been secretly thrilled. They ate together all the time, but they rarely made plans to meet and go out for purely social reasons. Maybe he had allowed himself to hope…
Mulder felt a startling lump in his throat and then he noticed the disheartened look on Catherine's face.
"You're disappointed?" Catherine asked sadly.
"No! No…no…of course not…" Mulder said quickly and rushed to sit down, genuinely not wanted to hurt his co-worker's feelings.
"You hardly look thrilled," Catherine observed and laughed awkwardly.
"No, I was just…I was expecting…I guess I was…"
Mulder uncharacteristically stumbled over his words and then Catherine gasped and brought her hand up to cover her mouth.
"Oh God, you were really expecting Dana, weren't you?" Catherine asked sympathetically.
Mulder shuffled awkwardly in his seat and looked down at the table.
Catherine took his silence as admission and smiled sadly. "Oh, Mulder…I'm so sorry…"
"I must look like a pretty sad sack right now, eh?" Mulder laughed awkwardly and rolled his eyes.
"You thought Dana had asked you on a date?" Catherine asked. "I thought you guys were pretty close?"
"We are. I guess she's my closest friend…my family…" Mulder observed a little sadly.
"But you thought she wanted more…" Catherine finished.
"I don't know what I thought. I thought…" Mulder shrugged. "You know about…?"
"Dana's cancer?" Catherine asked and then nodded.
"The last thing she needs is further complications in her life right now and here's me acting like a…like a…" Mulder stumbled over his words again.
"Lovesick teenager?" Catherine teased lightly and Mulder winced. "Hey, I'm not being cruel, but it sounds like you both need to talk."
A waiter came over and Mulder looked up at Catherine and raised his eyebrows.
Catherine laughed lightly, "How about we have a quick drink? I have some friends I can meet in an hour…reclaim my evening."
Mulder laughed gently, "I'm an awful date, aren't I?"
She shook her head, "I've had worse than this, Mulder…but turning up to a blind date only to find out that my date is in love with the person who set me up…that's going pretty high on the list."
"You won't…?" Mulder asked nervously as the waiter went to get them each a glass of red wine.
"Mulder, this is your business…it's not my place to tell Dana anything," she watched Mulder let out a nervous breath. "However, can I offer you a little unsolicited advice?"
Mulder shrugged and took a sip of his wine.
"You need to talk to your friend. And I mean really talk," she suggested seriously.
"My friend? Who is currently sat at home happy in the knowledge that she has set me up on a date with another woman? That friend?" Mulder suggested dryly, although even saying the words out loud increased his nausea.
"Dana is an honest person…" Catherine started. Mulder raised his eyes and she laughed. "A typically honest person," she conceded happily. "Would you like to hear some of the adjectives she used when cajoling me into meeting you for this world-class date?"
Mulder sighed and raised his eyebrows in a half-hearted encouragement for her to continue.
"I can't tell you word for word, but the description certainly included – smart, kind, funny, sincere, generous, passionate…sexy…"
Mulder had been looking down at the table as Catherine spoke but then looked up quickly at the final word, "She said sexy? Really?"
"Really zeroed in on that one, heh?" Catherine laughed. "Actually, I was hesitant at first and she clarified that you were 'gorgeous' and I'd be 'crazy' not to meet with you…"
Mulder licked his bottom lip nervously; scared to start to feel any hope again after the way this evening had turned out.
"That doesn't mean anything, Catherine. She set us up on a Goddamn date…" Mulder observed and then sighed with barely controlled irritation.
"You're scared?" Catherine inquired calmly.
"Of Scully? Yes, I'm fucking terrified…" Mulder hissed, clearly frustrated, but not angry with Catherine.
"Why?" Catherine tried again.
"I'm scared…because I don't know if she could ever feel this way about me. I'm scared because I have never felt this way about anyone and…" Mulder paused and closed his eyes, and then he took a breath and looked fiercely at his colleague. "I'm terrified that she could die, Catherine, because she's all I have…"
Catherine's eyes welled with tears and she reached across the table to touch his hand gently. "Fox Mulder, you need to talk to her."
"And if I lose her?" Mulder asked.
Catherine dismissed his concerns, "You really think Dana would just walk away from you? For any reason? Especially now? You won't lose her, Mulder. Not willingly. Not over this."
"She could…" Mulder started to talk and then found that he couldn't say the words.
"Mulder, Dana deserves better than to die never knowing that someone loves her as much as you do."
Mulder shook his head sharply, "This is not about me."
"Like hell, it's not. You can't be that much of a fool, Mulder. Dana is ill, but she is still taking time out of her days to try and set you up on dates – because she wants you to be happy. I would say for Dana, a lot of all this is about you."
Catherine stood and walked toward Mulder, she placed her hand softly on his shoulder and bent to gently speak into his ear. "Talk to your friend, tell her how you feel…for her sake even if not your own."
Mulder sighed, "I'm sorry, Catherine. About tonight..."
"I was surprised when I saw you, and I guess a little pleased…" Mulder looked guilty and Catherine rushed to shake her head, "…It was a momentary reaction, agent. Your partner is right, you are hot…but it's been a loooong time since anyone at the bureau thought they had a genuine chance with either of you."
Mulder chuckled sadly and stood to shake her hand, "For me at least…I think maybe since that first day. Thank you for being so good about this, I hope you have a good evening with your friends."
"Goodnight, Agent Mulder," Catherine said warmly and then smiled sadly as she walked away from what had honestly been the world's worst date.
