Lorraine Bates Mcfly was sitting upon a hill, the wind blowing through her hair. It was a tall hill, full of wildflowers, and overlooked the city of Hilldale. Then Lorraine stood up, her face full of worry and fear and other similar emotions. Her eyes turned towards the sky as a plane broke into pieces and went crumbling into the nearby ocean. Which was full of piranhas. She screamed. "George! George was on that flight!"
She broke into a run down the hill, but tripped and rolled and broke her crown. She had just got it at Burger King that very afternoon. Her eldest son Dave was the CEO of Burger King. But still, you just can't break those crowns like that. She finally landed, clutching the grass, crying.
The therapy group found Alice twitching uncontrollably at the bottom of the stairs, her golden eyes wide and glazed.
"Alice!" said Hermione. "What happened? We were all about to storm out of here as an angry mob when you fell to the ground in a mysterious fashion!"
"I had a vision!" replied Alice. "As I often do. Because my eyes time-travel. A woman named Lorraine is screaming! And there was a plane! A plane from Oceanic Airlines! Someone named George was on that plane!"
"My father's name is George," said Timmy. "But everyone calls him Dad. And he had to go to Australia to pick up a dead body."
Everyone gasped. "What does it mean?" asked Doc.
"It hasn't happened yet," said Alice. "We may never know. But all I know is that I had another vision. Marty Mcfly is at this time in the Amazon Rainforest! We need to get to the Amazon!"
"But how will we get to the Amazon?" asked Lewis.
"I have a train," volunteered Doc.
"I'm filthy rich," said Dr. Kroger.
"I'm smart," said Hermione.
"There must be a way to combine your talents in some useful and productive way that will get us to the Amazon," said the mysterious man from "The Time Machine".
In the end, they drove Doc's train with Hermione navigating. Dr. Kroger used his extensive wealth to buy them all food from Burger King. When they were all happily fed with golden crowns upon their heads, they found within the time train a small blonde boy wearing a hideous purple suit.
"The name is Verne," said the small boy.
"I know that!" said Doc. "I'm your dad. I wanted to name you Eugene, actually. But we were afraid kids would beat you up if you had that name. We didn't want another Jules experience. Anyway, what are you doing here?"
"I don't know," said Verne. "I fell asleep here. And know I don't know how to get home. But that Alice chick over there is sure hot. Not like that Hermione girl. She has bushy hair and big teeth."
"What talents can you give to our mission to destroy Marty Mcfly?" asked the "The Machine" guy.
"Marty Mcfly destroyed my childhood. I have spent half my young life time travelling. I don't know how old I am. Or where I am. Or when I am. My best friend Percy Jackson… he was my best friend. And then my dad over here made us move again because the time cops were after us. Again. And then Percy was an old man. And he didn't even remember me. Actually, I'm amazed he lived that long. So I offer you my talents as an evil mastermind in order to chase down Marty Mcfly."
"That's my boy," Doc said proudly.
At this time, the Space-Time Continuum suddenly bent itself, a reaction to the time travels of time-traveling idiots, and the Time Travelers Anonymous group found themselves conveniently in the Amazon.
But there was no Marty Mcfly. Only a note found amongst the katydids.
"Aren't those a bug?" Lewis asked.
"Yes," said Hermione. "Now I shall officially read the note." She cleared her throat and began:
"I have your friend Marty Mcfly in my clutches. He will be safe. For now. If you ever want to see your precious Marty Mcfly again, I want Lorraine. Because she's insanely hot. Like wow. You must deliver Lorraine into my hands. We will do this via a swap. This swap will occur at the clock tower on November 26, 1955, 10:04 P.M. And don't run into our other selves! Love, Biff."
"It's true," said Alice with a nod. "I know what I was doing that night." She smirked evilly.
"You bring me Lorraine," continued the note. "And I will bring Marty and bananas, just to make it fair."
They all decided they really liked bananas, even if they didn't like Marty Mcfly. After much discussion, they decided they would go get Lorraine and bring her to the appointed date and location. Bananas have potassium, and Timmy was short.
They made camp and slept in the rainforest that night. The guy from "The Time Machine" fought off the Morlocks with a sharp stick. It was quite an exciting night. The katydids chirped loudly, and the moon shone bright.
But they awoke the next morning with one burning question: Where the heck would they find Lorraine? And when would they find her? These are important questions when one time travels.
"I know!" said Doc. "She was at the high school in 1955!"
"But I saw her on a hill overlooking the crash of Oceanic Flight 115!" said Alice.
Verne sighed. "Well, what age do we want to get Lorraine at? Obviously, she will be at different ages in different times."
"Obviously," said Dr. Kroger. "Maybe we should split up and go after different Lorraines in different times."
"Won't that wreck the Space-Time Continuum?" worried Lewis. "I mean, that is why I'm going to ground my future son."
"We'll put them back when we're done," said Hermione. "Except for the one we give to Biff."
"But which one do we give to Biff?"
"The prettiest one, of course!" said Timmy.
And so they split into pairs: Hermione and Alice. (girl power!) Timmy and the guy from "The Time Machine". Doc Brown and Dr. Kroger (the Docs!) , and finally Lewis and Verne.
And thus they departed into the time stream….
