My stakes in claim mean nothing. My attempts of possession are in vain.
I am just a servant to all words, destined to be a master of none.
-Disclaimer-
Two
*The Antlers*
Chapter 2
He brought me out into the hall
(I could have sworn it was haunted),
And told me something that
I didn't know that I wanted
Miroku
"She hasn't been sleeping. From a professional standpoint, looking at these results she hasn't been able to for awhile. But from a personal point of view, I think we already knew this. All of us have realized that something has not been right with her for a long time," I say with tired eyes.
I set my clipboard down on an empty chair and turn to look at everyone in the hall.
"I think we should sit down," I mumble, wincing at my words.
The look in my eyes must be horrible. I can't believe that I have to be the one to tell them. Why is the world so cruel? And why is Kagome in this position in the first place? What did she do in a past life to deserve this? There's no way she did anything in this life that constitutes this kind of pain. She was always too kind for her own good.
Which is why I know she never meant to put me in this situation. She never meant for me to carry such a burden; never meant to put the weight of her world on my shoulders. But somebody's got to do it. Somebody's got to deliver the truth, because she can't do it anymore. She can't do anything anymore. It's too late for that. We were too late for that.
"This is entirely your fault, Inuyasha!" Sango glares right at him, tears forming in her eyes.
I wish she wasn't crying because of Kagome. I wish she wasn't saying those words. But there is some truth to them. And if anyone knows how much the truth hurts, it's me. Because right now, I'm the only one who knows the truth about Kagome. Right now, I'm the only one who has the ability to make each and every person's life in here implode.
I stare down the hall connecting to the lounge, biding time. Watch as the nurses' flit from one room to the next. Gaze at visitors who walk by us, not once glancing in the window of Room 124 to see the fragile girl lying on the bed. They're too preoccupied with finding their own loved ones, there's no space for them to find any sympathy for her.
And I know for a fact that there is nobody else who's coming to see her. Everyone in her life that truly cares about her is already here. Just 5 people, with a few stragglers along for the horrible ride. But when I think about it, the hallways should be filled. They would be filled too, with people pouring out onto the street if every person who she ever affected knew what was wrong.
But the world doesn't work like that. If it did, she wouldn't be in this position in the first place.
I'm wasting time. I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it. Once I open my mouth, everything is gonna go to Hell.
I shift my vision back to the people seated around me. My eyes fall on Sango first. She's so strong, but even she can't hold back the tears that are born from seeing the girl who's like a sister to her lying on a hospital bed, lifeless. God it hurts just looking at her. I wish I could take her pain away, dry the tears in her eyes before they fall onto these dirty hospital floors. I would do anything to make her stop crying. Anything.
She's got her arms around Shippo and Souta, always the doting aunt even in the face of disaster. Shippo's crying too, and rightly so. Ever since he walked in on her he's been a mess. I can't imagine what the poor kid is going through. To walk in on your mother figure and try to wake her up, only to find no matter what you do, she just won't open her eyes…
And Souta's just out of it. Kagome means the world to him. She's all he's got left. And barely so right now. That's why I don't wanna say anything; because once I start he's gonna break. I can see it in his unresponsive gaze, his rigid stance. He shouldn't have to go and lose another family member. He shouldn't be staring off into space right now, eyes frozen and unblinking at the health poster above Kaede's seat.
Speaking of Kaede, she's looking pretty concerned too. Kaede is just her boss and next-door neighbour but you can tell Kagome's affected her a lot. Her face is pale with bags under her eyes; she's as concerned as the rest of us.
Well, maybe not as much as one of us. Inuyasha's got his face in his hands, and he's barely holding it together. I've never seen him so close to tears before. It's gut-wrenching to look at. He's slightly shaking too, although you wouldn't realize it unless you stared at his hand clutching Kikyo's.
I'm kind of shocked that she's here actually. But her sister is here. And she's got a heart too I guess, even though it's her heart that's bound to be part of the cause of this problem in the first place. But she's been here as long as we have, ever since Kagome was found, so I'll give her that much.
"Miroku, cut it out with this bullshit and quit stalling." Inuyasha's feeble voice cracks in the middle of his sentence.
And I realize that I can't postpone this any longer. Because this is it; this is the moment of truth. All I can do to prepare myself is inhale, take a deep breath and then shoot one quick glance at the closed door of Room 124 before I begin.
Drop me a line.
