Thanks again Ztofan - you are a fantastic editor!

Running a finger along the countertop, he lifted it up to his eye line. Cake batter. There was only one loft occupant who could be responsible.

His eyes searched the kitchen - smudges and handprints in batter were smattered over the cabinets. In fact, the refrigerator held a mark that could only be described as a butt print. Schmidt shuddered.

Reaching into the cupboard under the sink, he pulled on a pair of yellow rubber gloves and began to scrub.


Nick rubbed his face onto her stomach, his stubble tickling her sensitive skin as she let out a pearl of throaty laughter. Lifting his head he caught her eye before he pressed his lips against her skin and blew.

"Stop! Stop! Truce!"

Smiling, he rolled onto his back and pushed himself up the bed until they were at equal heading and slipped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close.
"Do you know what tomorrow is?" he asked.

"Nooo," she replied hesitantly, placing her hand on his stomach.

"It's our two week anniversary."

"Of course." She snuggled into his warm chest and ran her lips across his jaw, "How could I forget such a momentous occasion?" she teased.

"I'll have you know that you have the honor of being only my fifth relationship to reach this important stage."

Jess pushed herself up onto her elbows and looked down at Nick.

"Seriously? I mean I thought that you, you know, had quite a lot of experience in the relationship area." Her thumb began to circle his navel and she felt him squirm a little at his touch.

"Relationships? Not really..." he shrugged.

A question popped into her mind and before she could think better of it, it spilled out of her mouth. "Nick how many woman have you been with?"His brow furrowed as he looked up at her, "Been with? Are we in some old time movie right now?"

She shoved his shoulder with her hand and he laughed, "Hey, don't laugh," her voice became a little quieter and she continued, "You know what I mean." She lowered her lashes and looked at him through their sooty veil. His eyes darted to her reddened lips - still bruised from the kisses - and he watched them twist and purse anxiously.

"Well, if you must know, it's, uh, twenty five. And a half."

"And a half?" she asked puzzled, before she shook her head, "Wait, I actually don't want to know."

She lay back against the pillow and stared up at the ceiling, plain except for a pale blue light shade suspended from its center. The room became quiet and she listened to Nick's soft breathing as she thought.

"Jess, are you okay?" he asked, slipping onto his side and moving his leg across her hips.

She fidgeted, pulling at the blanket that lay across her chest, her fingers rubbing the material between them, her eyes flashing from side to side.

"Jess," he repeated.

Rolling her head, she looked at him. "Nick, I didn't know that you had, well..." She swallowed. "I've not slept with anywhere near that number of people and..." She turned away and covered her face with her hands.

"Hey, hey Jessica." He began to pull her hands away from her face and tilted her chin to look at him. "That's all in the past. You have nothing to worry about."

She licked her lips. "Okay… But, I'm concerned about how I, you know, measure up. You have a lot of comparisons to make..."

"Okay, now you're being dumb. You are the most unbelievably sweet, sexy," she blushed, "Hot, amazing, beautiful, intelligent woman I have ever been with. Nothin' else matters."

"But surely you must, you know, compare…"

He slipped his hand underneath her head, cradling it and looked straight into her eyes. "There is no comparison. With you, it's different. It's amazing and new and better than anything I could ever have imagined. I promise."

"Awww," she said, biting her knuckle as she smiled.

"Honestly Jess, this all feels like a dream. I'm in no hurry to wake up."

She circled her arms around his neck as he leaned in for another slow, toe-curling kiss. "For someone who doesn't like to share how he's feeling, you've got some way with words, Miller." She reached up and pulled something from his hair. "Cake batter," she smiled.

"Mmm, that was fun. I'll never look at a cupcake the same way again."

Then he pulled her back towards him and her laugh echoed across the room.


The smell of pine cleaner filled the loft as Schmidt wiped away the last smudge of cupcake batter from the kitchen floor. He sighed in self-satisfaction as he pulled off the gloves and tossed them into the sink.

"Heathens," he muttered as he pulled out a cup and began to prepare his Indonesian peppermint tea. This was the second time that week he had had to clean up after them.

"Hey Schmidty - save the hot water," Nick appeared in the hallway, holding up his hand in a halting gesture.

"Nick," he began, "What are you wearing?"

Reaching the kitchen, Nick retrieved two cups and looked down at himself. "Shorts."

"Yes Nicholas, but whose shorts?"

He shrugged, "Jess's."

The small red shorts barely covered twelve inches of his body. Schmidt shook his head as he poured boiling water into his cup. "I can see your pooch, Nick. And is that-? Is that the outline of your junk? Eww." He placed down the kettle. "Can you not see what she is doing to you? First you are wearing her clothes, next she goes shopping for you and finally you will be dressing in matching outfits!"

Turning, Nick pulled his face into a frown. "And how many times have you tried to change my clothes, Schmidt?" Putting his hands on his hips, Nick squared up to his friend. "Can you not just be happy for me, for once? For the first time in a long time things are working out for me. I got the girl. And she's great."

They were silent as Schmidt sipped his peppermint tea and Nick prepared a cup of coffee for himself and Earl Grey for Jess. The sound of a door slamming was followed by a yawning Winston heading towards them.

"Winston. Winston. WINSTON!" Schmidt's voice escalated until Nick winced at the volume.

"Huh?" said Winston, pulling out an earplug from his left ear, "Why are you shouting?"

"Winnie - why are you wearing earplugs?" asked Nick, puzzled.

He pulled out the other earplug before reaching into the fridge and selecting a carton of orange juice. "Cos you and Jess are loud, Nick. Real loud. Like loud with a capital L, loud."

"See, Nick? You see what your relationship is doing to us? Poor Winston can't even sleep..."

Nick picked up the two cups and turned to Schmidt. "Look, you need to get over this. You are not going to stop this thing between me and Jess. So you may as well stop complaining and get used to it."

"Nick, Nick..." Schmidt cried as Nick stomped back to Jess's room.

"Winston, we need to work quickly. The loft dynamic is slipping. I feel like I'm losing my best friend."

"Hey, what about me?" Winston objected as he swallowed his juice.

"You know you're my standby Winston. And you are my number one friend of color," he said with a wink. "Help me fix this."

Winston shrugged and nodded, "Fine, What do you have in mind?"


The loft was quiet when they arrived back. It was late. Their date had been extended when they had decided to go for a walk after dinner. They'd laughed, kissed and talked.

"I wonder where Schmidt is? He's usually hanging around to harass us after a date." She shrugged off her coat and hung it up.

"I think he's still pretty pissed off," Nick replied as they stepped into the living area.

"He'll get over it," she smiled as she pulled him close. "Come on, we need to finish celebrating, if you catch my meaning," she winked.

She took his hand and started pulling him in the direction of their bedrooms. Suddenly she stopped and turned to him. "Um, Nick, where are our doors?"

Frowning, Nick looked ahead. His mouth dropped in surprise. The doors to both of their bedrooms had been removed and only the hinges remained, hanging sadly from the doorframe. Scowling, he turned on his heel and stormed to Schmidt's room. He banged on the door with his fist, "Schmidt! Open the door!"

Slowly, the door opened and Schmidt stood; a smug smile on his face, his arms crossed.

"Which one?" he smiled, opening the door a little further and gesturing to the two disembodied doors perched against the wall.

"You idiot! What are you thinking?" The furrow in between his brows increased as he took a deep breath.

"Yeah Schmidt, you took our doors? Seriously?" Jess stood beside Nick, her mouth pursed.

Schmidt began to inspect his nails as he replied, "I warned you and you didn't listen. I had to take action. This, this – thing is causing so many problems. I keep finding evidence of your activities, Winston and I can barely think over the noise..."

"Oh my God Schmidt! It's not like we are doing it every second of the day!" Jess cried.

Nick turned to Jess, "Can you give us a minute?" She nodded and sighed before heading to her now door-less room.

"Look pal," he placed his hand on Schmidt's shoulder, "This has got to stop. It's getting ridiculous."

"I needed to make a point."

"Fine, well you have. So give me the doors." Schmidt pulled his door to behind him and stepped in front of Nick.

"No Nick. I'm not giving you the doors back until you sign the oath. The madness has to stop."

Nick threw up his hands in frustration, "Seriously, you're still going on about that? It is not going to happen."

"Why are you being so selfish Nick? Can't you see that there are two other people who live in this loft!"

Nick rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "As far as I see it, you are the only one who has a problem with me and Jess. And maybe that has more to with your personal life than it has to do with what we may, or may not, be doing."

"Wh, wh- whaaaat? No, no. That's ridiculous. Whatever is going on in my life right not is completely separate from this-this mess!"

"Oh, we're a mess," Nick began to clap slowly, "Congratulations on being the most clueless guy I know!"

"You know, I have no idea why we are friends sometimes! You are selfish, uncaring, have very poor personal hygiene-"

"You know what, if you have such a big problem with me and Jess why don't you just move out?"

"Well maybe I will," Schmidt replied petulantly.

"I'll believe it when I see it," Nick scoffed as he stormed away.


Jess lay sprawled out on her bed, a pillow clutched to her stomach, when he walked in.

"He's still being an idiot. I'll go get the doors when he's at work tomorrow. Sorry," he gave her a twisted smile.

"Kinda ruined our plans…" she sighed, sitting up.

Nick's thoughts drifted off as she spoke, an idea forming in his head.

"Maybe not. Wait here, give me 30 minutes."

"Okay," she replied with an amused smile, wondering what he had up his sleeve.


She pulled on a cardigan as she headed to the roof when the text message arrived from Nick. "Nick, where are you?"

He appeared from around the corner with his hands in his pockets. "Close your eyes," he told her.

"Okay," she replied uncertainly, placing her palms over her eyes.

He guided her a few feet before pushing away her hands. "Welcome to the penthouse suite."

There, on the roof, he'd placed a tent – the one Schmidt had bought the week he decided to start camping. With a smile, she pushed back the opening and dipped down to step inside. Crawling inside, she pushed off her shoes. The air mattress they kept in the laundry room was there, along with a selection of pillows and blankets and a storm lantern that she recognized from a blackout last year.

"Wow, fancy!"

Settling in beside her at the foot of the mattress Nick pointed to one corner, "Here you see we have the living area, fully equipped with cushions and pillows." He pulled a cooler from behind him, "And as you can see there is a fully equipped mini bar with all your beverage needs." Leaning forward, he patted the mattress, "And here we have the finest, rubberized air-filled mattress your dollar can buy."

"What more could a girl ask for," she smiled, leaning in for a kiss and pulling him onto the makeshift bed. The plastic groaned and squeaked in protest as they shuffled up the bed, the shifting weight of their bodies making the mattress shake from side to side.

"Hmm," she laughed, "You know I've never had sex in a tent, uh, penthouse before."
"Is that so?" he replied. "Well we need to fix that…"

He began to slip the sweater over her shoulders and he reached down to kiss her slowly. The air was chilly and he pulled a blanket over them as she hooked her leg around his and tugged at his shirt. The air began to warm in the small space as they shed their clothes, their body heat and breathing turning up the temperature.

Soon there was nothing between them but a slick of sweat. "God you're amazing," he told her as ran his hands up and down her body, "I still can't believe this is happening."

She giggled and pulled him up to face her, "You're crazy."

"You're fantastic," he quipped back, his eyes darting around the delicate features of her face. He settled on top of her, his body pushing her into the mattress so its ends bowed slightly beside them. "I mean it. I've never met anyone like you before."

Biting her lip she stared up at her roommate-slash-boyfriend and wanted to pinch herself. "And I've never met anyone like you. Now come here and make me regret not getting things started between us months ago."

"As you wish," he whispered, his mouth heading straight for her neck while his hands continued to roam, eliciting soft moans and whispers from her.

She let him continue, seemingly covering every acre of her bare flesh with his touch until she could take it no more; she breathed heavily, whispering in his ear, "Make love to me."

He caught her eye and saw something unfamiliar, a glint of something different. Something he liked. Gently pushing her legs apart, he leaned into her ear and repeated, "As you wish."


The morning light filtered thought the blue material of the tent, casting an unnatural hue on its occupants. Her back creaked; it was now lying on the cold hard floor. The mattress, not up to the exertions of earlier, had spent the night slowly deflating.

She looked down at Nick. He was lying halfway down the bed, his arm slung lazily across her waist, his face half buried in the blanket they lay on. His bed head and stubbled face, combined with the half smile he was wearing, gave him an endearing quality. She reached out and ran her fingers though his hair.

Everything was happening so fast. She had no idea still what this really was. But she knew she liked it. A lot.

And no one, especially not Schmidt, was going to ruin it.