THE KEEPER OF 221B BAKER STREET

PART 02: INT. 221B BAKER STREET - ENTRYWAY - DAY

SHERLOCK Holmes enters the main door followed by Dr. JOHN Watson. SHERLOCK pauses in front of the stairway and starts to unwrap his scarf.

MRS. HUDSON (O.C.)
(raised voice)
Oh boys, is that you? Do come in and meet your new neighbor. (more excited) She's from America!

Both men look at each other and SHERLOCK shakes his head.

SHERLOCK
(raised voice)
No time, Mrs. Hudson! (voice lowered, taking the first steps up the stairs) Come on, John.

JOHN grabs the back of his long coat and draws him back.

JOHN
A few minutes will not kill you.

SHERLOCK
(agitated)
Your need to be sociable might.

The two men go up the hallway, into MRS. HUDSON residence with JOHN leading the way.

Entering the living area, MRS. HUDSON is standing over a center table, placing emptied teacups on a tray. In a padded armchair, a woman sits; her back is to the men who just walked in.

MRS. HUDSON looks up and her face lights up.

MRS. HUDSON
Here they are!

JOHN
Ah, Mrs. Hudson, who do you have here?

The WOMAN in the chair twists her upper body around to get a quick look. A warm smile immediately forms on her face.

Description of WOMAN: Youthful looking, tall, 5 feet 9 inches, long dark brown hair, oval face, clear complexion, smooth full lips, and very light make-up. Oblong eyeglasses cannot distract from her large hazel-green eyes. She is of a healthy weight with pleasing curves. Overall, not a beauty but very becoming and lady-like. She is wearing a layered, chocolate maxi-skirt with pockets, a flattering, ivory short-sleeved blouse with lace trim, and brown flats.

The woman rises from the chair and turns to the two men with pretty smile still showing. She outstretches her hand to the nearest, which is JOHN.

WOMAN
(soft spoken)
Dr. Watson (looking at Sherlock) and Mr. Holmes. I heard some unbelievable stories about you two.

JOHN
(vigorously taking her hand and shaking it)
John, please, and him, (thumbing towards Sherlock) un-neighborly. (beat) How did you know I was Watson?

SHERLOCK, is alerted and looks to the WOMAN to answer. He notices her faintly grimacing as JOHN releases her hand.

WOMAN
Oh, the voice that said 'John' was on his way upstairs. You were the one who said it would only take a few minutes, and when I heard you speak to Martha, I knew you had to be Dr. Watson.

SHERLOCK
(interest peaked)
From that chair (nodding at the chair), over Mrs. Hudson's chatter, you heard us?

The WOMAN's mouth curls up and nods.

JOHN
First time in London . . . um . . . Miss . . .

MRS. HUDSON
Oh, my manners . . . John, Sherlock, Miss Isabell Mayson.

MAE
Call me, Mae, please. And yes, on a work Visa. I'm so excited to be here.

JOHN
Mae? From your last name. That's different. I would think Bell.

MAE
It was Izzy for the longest time, and I never liked it. But since nicknames are easier to remember, Mae seemed like a good alternative.

JOHN
(leaning closer to her)
Well then, Mae, I don't want you to forget me so why don't you give me one.

SHERLOCK
(short snort)
Watts is catchy.

Both MAE and JOHN turn towards SHERLOCK; his hands are in his coat's pockets and he wears a smirk on his face. JOHN scowls at him. It is obvious he doesn't like the name suggestion.

MAE
I agree.

JOHN
(appalled)
Hold on! Sherlock!

SHERLOCK lets out a short chuckle. MAE's hand touches JOHN's upper arm to get his attention back to her.

MAE
I agree to give you a nickname. How about, Doc?

JOHN nods and is visibly relieved.

MAE
(turning to Sherlock)
And how about you, Mr. Holmes? Do you have a nickname?

SHERLOCK
Too many to count. I would prefer not to add—

JOHN
(interrupting)
He likes, Sherley. (beat) Yes, definitely Sherley.

SHERLOCK's head tilts towards JOHN to show the annoyance written on his face.

SHERLOCK
(calmly)
Um . . . no, try again.

MAE
(looking at Sherlock)
Even I wouldn't do that to you. I can tell you need a less casual address. I'll think of something. (holding out hand to him) Until then, pleased to meet you, Mr. Holmes.

SHERLOCK takes his hand out of his pocket and take her hand into his. He doesn't shake it; instead he turns her hand over and fingers the palm's smoothness, and noting the healing calluses, faded nicks and barely visible scars on her wrists and fingertips.

SHERLOCK
What's a commonplace PA doing here in London? Not many employers would bother with a work Visa and relocation of an ordinary office assistant.

MAE slowly draws her hand from SHERLOCK's hold and adjusting her eyeglasses more up on her nose. She is unaffected by his slightly accusatory tone.

MAE
You're right. The opportunity came and I took it. I had some money saved to get me out here. The job doesn't even pay all that well, (switching to a more positive tone) but I get to do the something I really enjoy.

SHERLOCK
Reading, judging by the strength of your specs and the discolored nose guards. But not much into non-fiction. You read mostly fluff fiction with happy endings and the hero saving the heroine and them riding off into the sunset together. Contented to see life unrealistically than face reality making you an impractical dreamer and (glancing at John) restrained socially.

MAE doesn't seem bothered by SHERLOCK's assertions. Instead, she takes off her glasses, and flips them around to examine the guards closely.

MAE
Hum . . . I never noticed that before. Eww.

MAE tries to rub some dirt off the guards. Both men are noticing her face without the glasses on. She looks even more youthful and fresh.

JOHN
Um . . . what will you be doing, Mae?

MAE puts her glasses back on quickly and addresses JOHN's question with excitement in her voice.

MAE
The British Library is converting their large collection of rare books into digital media. I will be doing a lot of reading, (glancing at Sherlock with a slight smile) researching the authors and writing up bio's and summaries. Many will become part of Project Gutenberg.

Anticipating JOHN's question, SHERLOCK answers.

SHERLOCK
(addressing John)
Project Gutenberg is a non-profit online e-book depository of published works that are no longer under copyright restrictions. Typically, a publication where the author has been deceased for over seventy-five years is considered public domain. The site converts these works into digital files for anyone to download at no costs.

MAE
With the library just blocks away on Euston, I can walk to work when needed, but the best part is that I can do most of the job remotely and won't have the boss looking over my shoulder.

MAE suddenly remembering something and her face takes on a baffled look.

MAE
(looking at Sherlock)
Did you say something about me being unrealistic . . . a dreamer? I'm curious, why even bring these up?

JOHN
Mae, don't encourage him. Mrs. Hudson and I would like for you to stick around.

MAE
(beaming)
That's so nice of you to say. But don't worry about me, I handle my critics well.

SHERLOCK, looking at her, a little taken aback at her placidness.

SHERLOCK
(clearing throat)
Unrealistic and impractical . . . both flaws. The tour brochures, in your bag there, (nodding towards the purse lying on the side of the armchair) look to be of palaces and castle ruins, which supports this fantasy for knights and chivalry. The paperback also in your bag, Gaskell's North & South, alerts me that you are a fan of English woman authors. In saying that, it would be likely that you are a period drama junkie, establishing characters like Mr. Darcy as your ideal man. You drift off into a simpler time and era, with BBC programming as your most watched channel on the telly. The romance you have built up in your mind of old British culture is why you are leaving your homeland and taking an unsponsored position with low compensation.

MAE
(calmly nodding in agreement)
It's true, I'm a dreamer. But Mr. Darcy, is way over rated and boring. Now, Mr. Rochester is more my type. Mysterious and dark, and passionate for his Jane Eyre. As for TV, I don't watch much but when I do, it is period dramas. (short laugh) So, junkie, seems appropriate. But you are wrong about the reason I came to Britain. My mom was British, and through her, I've come to love it and feel naturally drawn here.

SHERLOCK's brow rises at her admission.

JOHN
(frowning)
Wait . . . who's Mr. Rochester?

SHERLOCK
(head snaps to John)
Read the book. (head snaps back to Mae) But, you agree, indulgence in idle imagining is a flaw?

MAE
(laughing lightly)
I think it is more of an addiction than anything. Mom use to tell me to always keep things sweet and simple, and run from the sour and complicated. I guess daydreaming is my way to escape from it all. But what are the comparisons? Youth escape with endless hours of video games and TV. Adults with substance abuse and immorality of all sorts. I like to dream silly dreams and think happy thoughts. (smiling at John) Not bad addictions to have, right, Doc?

JOHN
(nodding enthusiastically, nudging Sherlock)
She's got you there, Sherley.

SHERLOCK could not help but grin at JOHN's humorous stab, and give MAE a rare, impressed, look.

MAE
I'm curious what other flaws do you detect in me, Mr. Holmes.

JOHN
Um . . . Mae, again, you may not want to ask—

SHERLOCK
On the surface, you are obviously accident-prone in the kitchen.

Whoosh! Zooming in on subjects of SHERLOCK's dialogue.

SHERLOCK (V.O.)
Faded burns on your wrist and arm, and just removed plaster on your right thumb should have avoiding any area with sharp knives and a stove. Your grip is light, indicating that dropping objects with smooth surfaces is common; when wet, even more so. Paper plates, cups and plastic containers would be advisable around you. You are religiously kind and bite your lower lip often to hold back what you really want to say to keep the peace and not offend, leading to pent up frustrations and fuming, most likely resulting in involuntary eruptions of female emotions and the throwing of items. The cat hair on the bottom front of your skirt is the length and color of the stray Mrs. Hudson feeds. The dirt and dust all around the hem shows that the skirt fanned out on the ground as you knelt down to stroke it. Your reward, it clawing you, there, by your elbow.

Back to SHERLOCK.

SHERLOCK
(passively, staring at Mae)
The lost dog flyer protruding from your skirt's pocket, you removed from the post about a block away from here, shows you have empathy for its owners and bolsters your compassion for the four-legged kind. In your benevolence, you mean to go out later on your own to search for the dog, but I can tell you that your time and efforts will be wasted.

MAE
(eyes widening)
How did you know I was going to go out. . . wait, wasted? Why?

SHERLOCK
Do you want to hear the truth or a happy ending?

MAE
(sadly with eyes downcast)
Oh . . . neither, I guess. (pulling flyer slowly from pocket) But you are wrong, Mr. Holmes. Kindness will never be a flaw. An inconvenience, perhaps, or even a weakness, but never a flaw. (handing the flyer over to Sherlock) If you could call the owners and tell them what happened, I would appreciate it.

SHERLOCK stares intently at MAE, and her soft, kind eyes raise and lock on his. A silent regard or understanding seems to be passing between them.

Absently, SHERLOCK takes the flyer, only to have it snatched away by JOHN. This breaks MAE's eye contact and she turns her head to JOHN. Not SHERLOCK. His eyes are still on the woman before him; his forehead furrows a bit.

JOHN
(speaking quickly)
I'll do that. He tends to go into too much detail and, well, doesn't do sympathy well.

MAE
Of course, thank you, Doc. You are probably the best man in breaking bad news to people. (turning to Sherlock) Is there anything else, Mr. Holmes?

JOHN grins at SHERLOCK, obviously liking being called 'best man' for once. SHERLOCK still focused on MAE, opens his mouth to continue but stops himself and his mouth clamps shut, and shakes his head. JOHN sees this and his grin fades to disbelief.

After a moment to recover, JOHN turns to MAE.

JOHN
Speaking of kindness not being a flaw but inconvenience, which we will gladly take on, if you need help moving, both of us will be available. (putting emphasis on the words 'we' and 'both')

SHERLOCK
(looking mildly surprised)
We will?

JOHN
Yes, we will!

MRS. HUDSON
(excitedly)
Oh, she is going to stay here, Sherlock. Mae is going to be your upstairs neighbor. (looking at John) And, John, if you could clear out the rest of your belongings.

JOHN
Of course, Mrs. Hudson. (looking at Mae) Not the flat on the other side of the shop, then?

MAE
(shaking her head)
I was having lunch at the shop and ran into Martha. We got to chatting, about this and that and I almost missed my appointment to view the apartment. I asked her if she would like to come with me. We both agree it is way too large and expensive for my needs. Martha saw how disappointed I was and she knew already that I was looking to get a second job, so she offered. She agreed to let me stay, rent free and in exchange, I'll keep things clean and tidy. (looking at Sherlock) Of course, I will only enter your space with your permission. I'm a hard worker, Mr. Holmes, highly organized and resourceful. I do enjoy cooking but if you feel that it would be unsafe—

JOHN
(jumping in quickly)
He gives you permission! (digging into pocket) Here take my key and get a copy made. Freely come and go whenever you want. (speaking defiantly) And, he will add to Mrs. Hudson's offer and give you a salary for your help. How about a hundred a week. (looking at Sherlock with a soured expression) No, better make it two. Two hundred a week!

MAE's face lights up, while nodding enthusiastically. She takes the key from JOHN.

SHERLOCK
I have no say in this matter?

JOHN
No, you don't! The place is in utter chaos since I left and, you are domestically incompetent in . . . everything. On top of that, you took advantage of poor, Mrs. Hudson, here. You'll probably do the same to Mae, so she might as well get paid for it. (smiling at Mae) But, I think she will do just fine. She seems, well, more tolerant.

MRS. HUDSON
He's right you know, Sherlock. I'm not your—

SHERLOCK
(interrupting)
Noted, Mrs. Hudson. Moving on. (turning to address Mae) Where are you from?

MAE
Kohler, Wisconsin.

SHERLOCK
Of course. Your accent is thicker. I should have known. Grew up there?

JOHN
(shocked)
You didn't know for sure?

MAE
Wisconsin Dells. Accent? Do I really have a Wisconsin accent on top of my American one?

SHERLOCK nods but does not elaborate.

MAE
Is it certain words or pronunciations that you pick up—

SHERLOCK
Your age?

JOHN
(gasping)
Now, hold on! You mean to say you don't know her age either?

MRS. HUDSON
(scolding)
Sherlock! Watch your manners . . . you know American women are touchy about that. (turning to Mae) But you're just lovely, Dear. Lovely.

MAE
(smiling appreciatively at Mrs. Hudson)
Thank you, Martha, but I don't mind. (turning to face Sherlock) If you guess, I won't be offended if you are wrong. Besides, how can anyone possibly know one's age accurately?

SHERLOCK brow rose and lowered back down.

JOHN
(rolling eyes)
Here we go. . .

SHERLOCK
Determining age, Miss Mayson, is the most fundamental use of deduction based upon a various number of factors . . .

And whoosh! Taken to various parts of MAE's body in a rush and it speedily going through transformations in the aging process.

SHERLOCK (V.O.)
. . . the main one being the natural process of ageing including facial lines, sagging, hair loss and greying, and overall condition of the body. You are of some age but your fleshy body doesn't betray it. Vanity then comes into play due in part for the need to render oneself younger by frosting oneself with cosmetics, foul youth creams, and plastic surgery. I detect no such applications, only the daily use of natural coconut oil to moisturize your skin where your pulsations are diffusing its light fragrance, and from the light sheen on the lips, you also use it as gloss.

Back to SHERLOCK.

SHERLOCK
Then there is the initial human experience of interacting with people.

Whoosh! Visions of infant girl rapidly going through normal experiences of growing and learning, up to a dark, punked-out, vampish teenager.

SHERLOCK (V.O.)
Absorbing a language, its vocabulary, and basic social skills in infancy up to the rebellious stage of late teens that would give way to knowing approximately what decade from which one was born. The music, television, and trends of that time can give away major clues. I narrowed it down but still cannot pinpoint the period to give an accurate age.

Back to SHERLOCK. He pauses to make her out more, pressing palms together and holding up to lips. JOHN is stupefied.

SHERLOCK
You've lost a considerable amount of weight and had to replace your entire wardrobe, so you frequent thrift shops and second hand stores, preferring the more feminine in your newly established confidence in your appearance over loyalty to any particular decade. These would certainly tell me your age but there are too many contradictions where you are concern. In saying this, I do not need to guess because by my question, Miss Mayson, it is clear that I don't have the answer. So, I will repeat, what is your age, and add, for Mrs. Hudson, a polite, please.

A stunned silence followed for a few seconds until MAE broke out of her daze and turned to JOHN.

MAE
(breathlessly)
Was that some sort of twisted compliment or was he somehow flirting with me?

JOHN
(shaking his head with a grin)
He flirts, but only with your mind, so it must have been a compliment.

MAE
(thoughtfully)
Oh, I see. Well, maybe I was the one flirting with his mind.

SHERLOCK and JOHN both give her questioning looks.

MAE
Tell me, Doc, does your friend like coconuts?

JOHN
(nods with grin forming)
Loves them! I've seen him devour several Mounds bars in one sitting. (winks at Mae) And with the odor coming from his place, the tropical plug-in air fresheners must have long since expired.

Broad smiles broke out on all the faces minus one. SHERLOCK crosses his arms on his chest, obviously not amused.

MAE
(cheerfully)
Well, I'll add them to the shopping list and bake him some Macaroons.

Taking two steps forward, MAE secures her hand on SHERLOCK's shoulder and raises herself up to whisper in his ear her age. SHERLOCK's brow jerks and the corner of his mouth twitches up, indicating his surprise. JOHN shakes his head in awe.

Lowering herself, MAE steps back with a pleasant expression on her face. A chink of a spoon, has MAE turning sharply towards MRS. HUDSON, who is behind her.

MAE
Martha, let me help you with that tray. (turns back to John and Sherlock) Please, excuse me.

MAE moves quickly, not allowing MRS. HUDSON to pick up the tray. As she moves towards the kitchen, she speaks over her shoulder.

MAE
(sweetly)
It was nice meeting you two. I'll see you later.

JOHN
Yes, you too, Mae.

SHERLOCK nods once her way and pulls phone out of coat pocket.

Typing into search: MANUFACTURERS KOHLER WI, and one company's name is prominent in Eastern Wisconsin. Clicks on link to company's web site.

JOHN elbows him. SHERLOCK looks up from the phone at him.

JOHN
Martha? Did you know that was Mrs. Hudson's—

SHERLOCK
Yes.

JOHN
Ah. (pauses three beats) So, you really were off, then?

SHERLOCK looks off to the two women in the kitchen, chatting away, moving about in the kitchen. MAE's musical laughter chimes and soft voice reach the men's ears. Suddenly, a dish is heard shattering on the floor and both men look at each other.

SHERLOCK
Not even close.

JOHN jaw drops, looking towards the kitchen. SHERLOCK turns on his heel, and moves for the door.

SHERLOCK
(calling over his shoulder)
When she is done picking up the pieces, tell her I need mousetraps and clean sheets straight away.