Title: Round 1 - Playing The Family
Series: Playing Games
Rating: T
Spoilers: Post-BDM
Pairing: Jayne/River
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my over-Rayned mind. And I have no money, so suing me is useless.
Notes: This is unbeta-ed. Any mistakes are strictly mine.
Summary: "Gorram crazy-girl! You can't keep doin' that to a man!"
Jayne swaggered into the mess with a confident step. He wasn't gonna be letting the crazy girl do any kissin' on him. No, sir. No matter how pretty she'd looked perched on his chest or how pink her lips were or how sweet her breath was. There was no way she was gonna be getting' that close to 'im today. No. Way.
River wouldn't have had to have been a reader to have known that she was going to be in for a struggle. He had obviously been thinking of ways of stalling her plans. Silly boy. Didn't know that the kissing was inevitable and that his opponent already knew what steps had to be taken to further their progress.
She had realized that the big, tough mercenary would put up a fight, but she'd be lying if she said she hadn't hoped he would give in to her right away. And she had so hoped to get right to the sexin', too…
Internally shaking off the distracting thoughts of Jayne-sex, River watched him behind the veil of her hair. No matter how many times she noticed it, she was always surprised at how the man moved with ease and grace, considering his bulk. She observed the way the muscles in his arms moved beneath his skin as he reached for the food in the center of the table.
Jayne glanced up at her and caught her eye, throwing in a wink for good measure – just to let her know that he knew she was watching.
She elegantly raised a brow in response, then ruined it by rolling her eyes at him. It wasn't as though she were trying to hide the fact that she'd been staring. His smirk only widened.
The rest of the crew was witness to this silent conversation, exchanging questioning and, in the cases of Simon and Mal, outraged glances.
"Jayne…"
"Yeah, Mal?" The mercenary tore his smug gaze from River's and addressed the captain.
"Why're you eyin' up our little assassin here as if you're gonna be havin' her for breakfast and not the protein? You better not be plannin' somethin' stupid, Jayne, or so help me, I will let you go out the airlock this time." He tried to control the anger in his voice, he really did. It really wasn't his fault he was so bad at it, was it?
"Aww, Mal, I ain't plannin' nothin'." Should be worried more about what the crazy-girl's got planned, than me. River's unladylike snort was met with a quick glare. "Crazy-girl 'n I're just havin' a friendly little starin' contest, ain't that right, girly?"
Mal glanced at River, who, though perched serenely on her chair, still smiled at the rough man across from her.
"That right, little witch?"
"That is right, Captain. Jayne does not mean me any harm. He only wishes he had more of a chance to spend time with me." With that, River's foot slid up Jayne's leg under the table and into his lap. Her smile widened when Jayne choked on his mouthful of protein mash. So much for his keeping the upper hand today after being left so beside himself the night before. And he couldn't just stick his hand to his crotch to ward off her foot, neither, or the crew'd really notice somethin' was up
"What?!" Mal was glowering something fierce, and Simon surged to his feet. Kaylee laid a calming hand on his arm and he slowly let himself back down.
Now, Jayne wasn't scared of much. Reavers, 'a course, and maybe Zoë when she was pissed, but not much else. He couldn't honestly say he was even scared of Crazy anymore, not with her savin' 'em all on Mr. Universe's moon.
But at that moment in time, what with River's foot pressing lightly into his groin and Mal and Simon glarin' at 'im like that, Jayne was feelin' some mighty fearful tingles crawlin' up his spine. And that gorram little crazy-girl was still smilin' at him!
"Yes, Captain. I am a weapon, and Jayne, being profoundly intrigued by weapons of all kinds, finds me fascinating. He would like to see the extent of what I am capable of. Nothing more." She gave him a hard rub with the pad of her foot.
A collective sigh was released around the table. Little did anyone know Jayne's was for an entirely different reason.
"Well, if you're sure that's all…"
"Nothing more, Captain."
"Good. That's good to hear." He shook his head. "Now, let's get on to business. We'll be landin' on Persephone in 'bout 3 hours, so it's time to hand out everyone's planet-side assignments. Simon and Kaylee, I want you two to stock up on anything we might need for the infirmary, engine, and kitchen. Might as well get as much as we can, while we can."
He turned to the companion. "'Nara, you mentioned you had some shopping to do, sundries and the like, so that'd be the time to do it. Zoë and I'll go to the meet. It's with an old army friend, so we shouldn't have much need for violence. That means that, Jayne, you're staying with the ship."
"Aww, uh, Mal…"
"This is not up for debate, Jayne. And, in light of that little revelation earlier, I'd have to say you should be thrilled – since River'll be staying with you."
She squeezed him a bit with her toes, as if to tell him the two of them could have plenty of fun here, alone… "Gah, wha-uh… oh, uh… 'kay."
Simon cast a worried glance at the captain. "Are you sure that that's a good idea? I'm sure River would be much happier in town shopping with Kaylee and me."
"D'you hear what I said about this bein' up for debate, Doc, and how it's not? Now, don't be lookin' so scandalized, Doctor. Might be a good idea for River to explore her strengths a little bit. And who better for her to do it with than our hired gun?"
Jayne just about choked again, and River stifled a giggle, halting her movement, but leaving her foot in his lap. Ain't that a loaded question?
Mal continued as though uninterrupted. "Besides, she could take him out iffen he ever tried anything, anyways."
"Yeah, Simon. Don't you worry none 'bout River. She'll be fine here with Jayne. And besides, we can use this as a little shoppin' date. It'll be fun! Not that havin' you with us ain't fun, River…" Kaylee turned to her friend apologetically, but River just nodded in understanding.
Simon smiled. "I supposed you're right. But only if River's certain."
"I will be fine, ge ge. Go have fun shopping with Kaylee. Buy her something nice."
Mal sensed he was quickly losing control of this discussion, and decided to close it before it got too out of hand. "Alright, then. I believe that to be all. If everything's settled, we'll meet in the bay before headin' out our separate ways. Dong ma?"
Without waiting for a response, he stood and brought his and Inara's empty bowls to the sink then offered the companion his arm. "May I escort you back to your shuttle, ma'am?"
"I would be delighted, Captain. Thank you."
The rest of the crew took Mal's departure to mean that the meeting was over. Simon and Kaylee headed towards the engine room to "prepare for landing" and Zoë left in the direction of the crew quarters. She paused just outside the door when she heard River's voice.
"Are you ready for me, Ape-man?"
"I don't think I'm gonna ever be ready for ya, Crazy, but you made it perfectly clear last night and with that stunt just now that I ain't got much choice in the matter."
Zoë frowned. Last night? Stunt?
"And it'll be just my luck iffen I don' get spaced when they find out 'bout your little 'game'. I'm not lookin' to get dead, you know."
"I will not let them dispose of you. I started this. The question is, are you going to finish it?"
Oh, my. It sounds like River's looking to get Jayne into a compromising position. Oh, Wash, baby, you would have loved this. Zoë smiled sadly as she thought of her husband and continued to her bunk. It didn't seem like this whatever-it-was between the two deadliest members of the crew was too serious, and so she saw no need in telling the captain just yet. But she'd be keeping an eye on them, just in case. This should get mighty interesting...
Back in the mess, Jayne and River continued their discussion.
"Finish it? Now you know I don't kiss on the mouth, girly."
She smiled patronizingly at him, and if humoring a small child. "Yes, Jayne, I know."
"Then what was all that go se you was talkin' 'bout last night? Then the kissin' 'n the… rubbin', from today? And speakin' on that, you might wanna see to that wanderin' body 'a yours, 'less you wanna be considered a tease. Ain't right to get a man all kinds of excitable, then leave him hangin'."
"Today was just for fun." River grinned and dropped her foot from his lap. "Last night, I had to add a spark to start the fire. We may not be kissing right now, but we will. It was the first step. Needed you to know what you wanted, but couldn't yet have."
"I don' want no kissin', ya hear me?" He paused to clear his head now that the distraction from her foot was receding. "Wait, yet?"
"Yet. The game has only begun, and we have yet to establish all the rules and conditions. Round one has ended with the desired results. Family has allotted time for round two. That begins in the cargo bay." River rounded the table to Jayne's side and stood behind his chair with her hands on his shoulders. He tensed. So much for not lettin' her get close…
Leaning down, River spoke softly. "The kissing will commence when you do want it and are ready for it." She brushed a kiss against his cheek and straightened. "In the meantime, set out the mats in the cargo bay. We will explore my flexibility and my proficiency for weaponless combat. I'll try not to grab you inappropriately this time. No guarantees."
Jayne was surprised at the awareness that he had had to resist turning his mouth towards hers. One day. One gorram day and I'm already wantin' to throw in the towel… She squeezed his shoulders softly before letting go and padding to the door.
River giggled to herself. If round two is as successful as round one, we will be kissing in very little time. "Until round two, Jayne." She disappeared from view, leaving the flabbergasted mercenary alone, muttering about the "crazy-reader-assassin-girl-who's-trying-to-make-me-as-crazy-as-she-is".
Jayne's indignant ramblings came to an abrupt halt. Oh, go se. Weaponless combat, in'propriate grabbin'… For a moment, his thoughts lingered on the fight in the Maidenhead, but he shook them away.
Jayne shifted uncomfortably and glanced down at his lap.
"Aww, hell…" He lifted his head to shout after her. "Gorram crazy-girl! You can't keep doin' that to a man!"
